As deep as you are as hell
Chapter 132: He stood up again
For the life of the first 25 years, my brain is blank, and no matter how I dig out the memory, I can't dig out any slush claws.
Also since April, Li Liang has prescribed many, many medicines to me every month.Some medicine bottles are also very strange, blank bottles, not even a name, no instructions.
And when I take the medicine every day, Ah Yan will stay by my side and watch me swallow the medicine piece by piece.I have no chance of sneaking away the medicine at all.
After taking the medicine, my little face almost wrinkled into a bitter gourd, and I felt that even the root of my tongue was foaming with bitter foam.
And Ah Yan's clean palm opened, and there was a candy wrapped in colorful paper quietly on it.
Sometimes I feel that the relationship between Ah Yan and me is very strange. He treats me very well, but this kindness is also very pure. There is no emotion between men and women at all. Instead, it is more like the attitude of a brother to a sister.
So what is my attitude towards him?
In many late nights, my body started to have a high fever for no reason. It was Ah Yan who took good care of me and found alcohol to wipe my forehead, hands and feet.
He obviously has a handicap, but he is willing to push the wheelchair back and forth in the villa for me time and time again.
And what I said to him unintentionally, Ah Yan remembers clearly.
One day I just muttered that I really wanted to eat soft-boiled eggs, and Ah Yan even cooked for me, and even made several dishes that I felt very familiar with.
He knew that I had a sweet taste. The sweet and sour pork, sweet and sour pork that day...every dish hit my heart.But I still feel that his approach is not the way of London.
I have a delicate personality, and I hate others to attack me the most, and I am also afraid of the dark night.
So Ah Yan talked to me in an extremely gentle tone, even his room was next to mine.As long as I press the alarm bell on the bedside at night, he will definitely appear by my side within 3 minutes.
Ah Yan's kindness to me is like spring rain sneaking into the night, watering the green wheat field in my heart.
During those days spent with him day and night, if you want to say that I didn't have a moment's heart for him, it would be a lie.
But I also seem to know in my heart that that kind of feeling doesn't look like real liking, and my swaying heart still hasn't found a stable place. Instead, I feel that Ah Yan is more like a substitute for someone.
But I can't remember anything about the past.
If I insist on recalling it, I get a headache and a bursting feeling.
Now Ah Yan is in front of me, reaching out and rubbing the top of my hair.The bright sunshine fell on him, covering him with a particularly ambiguous and beautiful atmosphere.
"Then it's settled. After Dr. Li finishes your examination tomorrow, I'll take you to school next Monday." Ah Yan's ending voice was slightly raised, and it sounded a little joyful.
"I'll accompany you to watch the sunrise tomorrow." The words suddenly turned a corner, and Ah Yan looked at me intently.
I find it strange, why does he suddenly want to accompany me to watch the sunrise?
Moreover, the terrain on the side of the villa is too flat, and the sunrise seen is also flat. How can it be as beautiful as the sunrise seen on the top of the mountain?
As if piercing through the thoughts in my heart, a smile appeared on the corner of Ah Yan's mouth: "I will accompany you to climb the mountain and go outdoors to watch the sunrise. After we come back after watching the sunrise, you can obediently go to Dr. Li for a checkup. This deal How about it?"
Going to Liliang every month for examination and medicine is almost a routine for me.But there are very few opportunities for me to step outside the villa.
I agreed straight away, for fear that Ah Yan would go back on his word.
The sun was setting, sinking below the horizon.
In the rays of the sun, sporadic images suddenly flashed in my mind, as if I had walked a long street with someone, and finally I stopped behind him, enjoying the sky with him, and the solitary birds flying together.
But who is that person?Why can't I remember anything in my mind?
I shook my head, trying not to think about this headache.But the blue diamond necklace around my neck started to feel slightly hot.
Early in the morning of the second day, when the sky was still dim, I had already gone out with Ah Yan, ready to go to Tanhua Mountain.
This mountain has never had a name before. Every time I look at the distance from the top of the villa, my eyes always fall on the top of this sharp mountain. Ah Yan half-jokingly called that mountain "Tan Huashan".
The mountain is not just me, I will go to the mountain.
When pushing Ayan's wheelchair up the hill, I felt the long-lost relaxation and joy in my body and mind. I don't remember how long I haven't been in touch with the outdoor scenery or heard the chirping birdsong.
But before I got halfway up the mountain, my physical strength began to run low, my palm-sized face was unknowingly pale, and my forehead was covered with a thin layer of sweat.
Ah Yan was talking to me about the scenery along the way with great interest, but when I turned around, I was almost taken aback.
When I fell forward, he grabbed my arm in time and took me into his arms.
His embrace is wide and warm, and I have the impression that I have never had much contact with the opposite sex.But why lying in Ah Yan's arms, I didn't hear my heartbeat beating like a drum at all?
Don't I love Ah Yan?
But Li Liang clearly told me that I must have loved someone deeply before.The necklace around my neck and the plain ring on my hand were all given to me by that person.
If that person wasn't Ah Yan... then who would he be?
I crashed into Ah Yan's arms and hit his chin with my forehead.Lying on Ah Yan's chest, I clearly heard a muffled shout from above me.
"Did it hurt you?" I was just about to struggle to stand up, but found that my whole body was limp, and I couldn't even exert strength in my hands and feet.
Ah Yan has the habit of carrying a handkerchief with him. When he helped me wipe the thin sweat on my forehead, he frowned suddenly the next moment.
"Why is your forehead so hot?"
Before I could react, Ah Yan began to check my whole body nervously: "Did you get hurt anywhere?"
My eyes were blank, I obviously didn't feel any pain for a moment, and I didn't bump anywhere, how could I get hurt?
And even if I'm hurt, what does that have to do with my fever?
A Yan's eyes were firmly attached to me, and finally fixed on the white knees exposed under my white gauze skirt.I moved down his line of sight, only to find that there was a red mark there, with blood oozing out along the skin texture.
The wound seemed to be inflamed, and the blood flowed more and more fiercely. After a while, my skirt was stained with blood.
Ah Yan tried to help me stop the bleeding, but even a handkerchief was dyed red, but nothing worked. Instead, something in my body seemed to be passing away, which made me feel like I was going to faint at any time.
Now we are halfway up the mountain, far from the top of the mountain, and it is difficult to go down the mountain.
And this small road is rarely seen by people, not to mention that it is not yet seven o'clock in the morning, who would get up early in the morning to wander around here?
My eyes went dark, and when I was about to fall forward again, I finally learned to be smart. I took the initiative to put my arms around Ah Yan's thin waist, and leaned my head in his arms, trying to drive away the bursting headache. feel.
"Ayan, my head hurts. Why do I feel like I'm going to die?"
It's really not that I made a fuss or deliberately said frustrating words, but that I can really feel that my body is very weak, and my physical strength is not even comparable to that of a seven-year-old child.
Ah Yan seemed to know all kinds of strange thoughts in my mind, and smacked my forehead heavily: "What nonsense are you talking about? You just got a cut in your knee and started talking about life and death? How can you be so delicate?"
"I'll send you down the mountain, and then I'll go to a hospital to stop the bleeding. Then you can sleep well, and when you wake up, the fever has just subsided, and you may be noisy again."
I grinned a smile uglier than crying: "But why did you send me down the mountain?"
The mountain road is rugged and difficult, and we have spent a lot of effort when we climbed the mountain.
But Ah Yan's words still gave me a lot of relief, at least I can calm down a little bit, and I don't think so wildly anymore.
My limbs were limp, and I couldn't find the strength to force myself to stand up.But Ah Yan kept hugging my waist tightly, and a blue vein suddenly popped up on my neck.
"Ayan, what are you doing?!" The moment I soared into the air, the sound of exclamation almost came out of my throat.
From the moment I met Ah Yan, he was already in a wheelchair.
And Li Liang also told me that Ah Yan's leg injury was an old disease, and it was a blessing in misfortune that he didn't have his leg amputated when the root cause of the disease fell.But no matter what, Ah Yan will never have any chance to stand up again in this life!
But just now—
A Yan was trying to stand up just now, but his figure was wobbly, and soon fell back into the wheelchair!
"People like Ah Yan don't plan to do rehabilitation training, nor do they plan to change prosthetics... To put it a bit cruelly, according to his current situation, the muscles in his legs will only shrink more and more... so what? The possibility of regaining the ability to walk normally?"
When I asked Li Liang about Ayan's injury with longing but anxiety, these were the exact words she told me.
But now Ah Yan is struggling to stand up again and again!
Every time I see him fall back on the chair again, I can't help but feel uncomfortable... His physical condition is obviously like this, but at this time, he still remembers to take good care of me, and even tried to stand up and send me to the hospital. down the mountain.
"Ayan, let's call..." I took out my phone, and finally remembered that I could call Li Liang and the others for help.
But the next moment, I was leaning on the side of the tree trunk, but I was hugged by Ah Yan through the waist.He glanced back at his wheelchair, as if he was considering whether he could put me up and push me down the hill.
But he also remembered the subconscious disgust in my eyes when I saw this wheelchair for the first time, and he just took me down the mountain without saying a word.
My arms were tightly wrapped around Ah Yan's neck, and every time he took a step, I felt anxious.And I can also feel the effort of Ah Yan to send me down the mountain. There are large drops of sweat rolling down his neck, and the sticky sweat smell squeezes out the refreshing woody fragrance.
The broken hair on his forehead was wet, his eyes looked wet, and his lips gradually lost their color.
My body was swept by the heat wave, and I felt that the temperature of my body was getting higher and higher. The little sobriety I had left forced me to hug Yan's neck tightly and not let go.
"Ayan, if it doesn't work, you can just let me down? I can do it myself..."
Also since April, Li Liang has prescribed many, many medicines to me every month.Some medicine bottles are also very strange, blank bottles, not even a name, no instructions.
And when I take the medicine every day, Ah Yan will stay by my side and watch me swallow the medicine piece by piece.I have no chance of sneaking away the medicine at all.
After taking the medicine, my little face almost wrinkled into a bitter gourd, and I felt that even the root of my tongue was foaming with bitter foam.
And Ah Yan's clean palm opened, and there was a candy wrapped in colorful paper quietly on it.
Sometimes I feel that the relationship between Ah Yan and me is very strange. He treats me very well, but this kindness is also very pure. There is no emotion between men and women at all. Instead, it is more like the attitude of a brother to a sister.
So what is my attitude towards him?
In many late nights, my body started to have a high fever for no reason. It was Ah Yan who took good care of me and found alcohol to wipe my forehead, hands and feet.
He obviously has a handicap, but he is willing to push the wheelchair back and forth in the villa for me time and time again.
And what I said to him unintentionally, Ah Yan remembers clearly.
One day I just muttered that I really wanted to eat soft-boiled eggs, and Ah Yan even cooked for me, and even made several dishes that I felt very familiar with.
He knew that I had a sweet taste. The sweet and sour pork, sweet and sour pork that day...every dish hit my heart.But I still feel that his approach is not the way of London.
I have a delicate personality, and I hate others to attack me the most, and I am also afraid of the dark night.
So Ah Yan talked to me in an extremely gentle tone, even his room was next to mine.As long as I press the alarm bell on the bedside at night, he will definitely appear by my side within 3 minutes.
Ah Yan's kindness to me is like spring rain sneaking into the night, watering the green wheat field in my heart.
During those days spent with him day and night, if you want to say that I didn't have a moment's heart for him, it would be a lie.
But I also seem to know in my heart that that kind of feeling doesn't look like real liking, and my swaying heart still hasn't found a stable place. Instead, I feel that Ah Yan is more like a substitute for someone.
But I can't remember anything about the past.
If I insist on recalling it, I get a headache and a bursting feeling.
Now Ah Yan is in front of me, reaching out and rubbing the top of my hair.The bright sunshine fell on him, covering him with a particularly ambiguous and beautiful atmosphere.
"Then it's settled. After Dr. Li finishes your examination tomorrow, I'll take you to school next Monday." Ah Yan's ending voice was slightly raised, and it sounded a little joyful.
"I'll accompany you to watch the sunrise tomorrow." The words suddenly turned a corner, and Ah Yan looked at me intently.
I find it strange, why does he suddenly want to accompany me to watch the sunrise?
Moreover, the terrain on the side of the villa is too flat, and the sunrise seen is also flat. How can it be as beautiful as the sunrise seen on the top of the mountain?
As if piercing through the thoughts in my heart, a smile appeared on the corner of Ah Yan's mouth: "I will accompany you to climb the mountain and go outdoors to watch the sunrise. After we come back after watching the sunrise, you can obediently go to Dr. Li for a checkup. This deal How about it?"
Going to Liliang every month for examination and medicine is almost a routine for me.But there are very few opportunities for me to step outside the villa.
I agreed straight away, for fear that Ah Yan would go back on his word.
The sun was setting, sinking below the horizon.
In the rays of the sun, sporadic images suddenly flashed in my mind, as if I had walked a long street with someone, and finally I stopped behind him, enjoying the sky with him, and the solitary birds flying together.
But who is that person?Why can't I remember anything in my mind?
I shook my head, trying not to think about this headache.But the blue diamond necklace around my neck started to feel slightly hot.
Early in the morning of the second day, when the sky was still dim, I had already gone out with Ah Yan, ready to go to Tanhua Mountain.
This mountain has never had a name before. Every time I look at the distance from the top of the villa, my eyes always fall on the top of this sharp mountain. Ah Yan half-jokingly called that mountain "Tan Huashan".
The mountain is not just me, I will go to the mountain.
When pushing Ayan's wheelchair up the hill, I felt the long-lost relaxation and joy in my body and mind. I don't remember how long I haven't been in touch with the outdoor scenery or heard the chirping birdsong.
But before I got halfway up the mountain, my physical strength began to run low, my palm-sized face was unknowingly pale, and my forehead was covered with a thin layer of sweat.
Ah Yan was talking to me about the scenery along the way with great interest, but when I turned around, I was almost taken aback.
When I fell forward, he grabbed my arm in time and took me into his arms.
His embrace is wide and warm, and I have the impression that I have never had much contact with the opposite sex.But why lying in Ah Yan's arms, I didn't hear my heartbeat beating like a drum at all?
Don't I love Ah Yan?
But Li Liang clearly told me that I must have loved someone deeply before.The necklace around my neck and the plain ring on my hand were all given to me by that person.
If that person wasn't Ah Yan... then who would he be?
I crashed into Ah Yan's arms and hit his chin with my forehead.Lying on Ah Yan's chest, I clearly heard a muffled shout from above me.
"Did it hurt you?" I was just about to struggle to stand up, but found that my whole body was limp, and I couldn't even exert strength in my hands and feet.
Ah Yan has the habit of carrying a handkerchief with him. When he helped me wipe the thin sweat on my forehead, he frowned suddenly the next moment.
"Why is your forehead so hot?"
Before I could react, Ah Yan began to check my whole body nervously: "Did you get hurt anywhere?"
My eyes were blank, I obviously didn't feel any pain for a moment, and I didn't bump anywhere, how could I get hurt?
And even if I'm hurt, what does that have to do with my fever?
A Yan's eyes were firmly attached to me, and finally fixed on the white knees exposed under my white gauze skirt.I moved down his line of sight, only to find that there was a red mark there, with blood oozing out along the skin texture.
The wound seemed to be inflamed, and the blood flowed more and more fiercely. After a while, my skirt was stained with blood.
Ah Yan tried to help me stop the bleeding, but even a handkerchief was dyed red, but nothing worked. Instead, something in my body seemed to be passing away, which made me feel like I was going to faint at any time.
Now we are halfway up the mountain, far from the top of the mountain, and it is difficult to go down the mountain.
And this small road is rarely seen by people, not to mention that it is not yet seven o'clock in the morning, who would get up early in the morning to wander around here?
My eyes went dark, and when I was about to fall forward again, I finally learned to be smart. I took the initiative to put my arms around Ah Yan's thin waist, and leaned my head in his arms, trying to drive away the bursting headache. feel.
"Ayan, my head hurts. Why do I feel like I'm going to die?"
It's really not that I made a fuss or deliberately said frustrating words, but that I can really feel that my body is very weak, and my physical strength is not even comparable to that of a seven-year-old child.
Ah Yan seemed to know all kinds of strange thoughts in my mind, and smacked my forehead heavily: "What nonsense are you talking about? You just got a cut in your knee and started talking about life and death? How can you be so delicate?"
"I'll send you down the mountain, and then I'll go to a hospital to stop the bleeding. Then you can sleep well, and when you wake up, the fever has just subsided, and you may be noisy again."
I grinned a smile uglier than crying: "But why did you send me down the mountain?"
The mountain road is rugged and difficult, and we have spent a lot of effort when we climbed the mountain.
But Ah Yan's words still gave me a lot of relief, at least I can calm down a little bit, and I don't think so wildly anymore.
My limbs were limp, and I couldn't find the strength to force myself to stand up.But Ah Yan kept hugging my waist tightly, and a blue vein suddenly popped up on my neck.
"Ayan, what are you doing?!" The moment I soared into the air, the sound of exclamation almost came out of my throat.
From the moment I met Ah Yan, he was already in a wheelchair.
And Li Liang also told me that Ah Yan's leg injury was an old disease, and it was a blessing in misfortune that he didn't have his leg amputated when the root cause of the disease fell.But no matter what, Ah Yan will never have any chance to stand up again in this life!
But just now—
A Yan was trying to stand up just now, but his figure was wobbly, and soon fell back into the wheelchair!
"People like Ah Yan don't plan to do rehabilitation training, nor do they plan to change prosthetics... To put it a bit cruelly, according to his current situation, the muscles in his legs will only shrink more and more... so what? The possibility of regaining the ability to walk normally?"
When I asked Li Liang about Ayan's injury with longing but anxiety, these were the exact words she told me.
But now Ah Yan is struggling to stand up again and again!
Every time I see him fall back on the chair again, I can't help but feel uncomfortable... His physical condition is obviously like this, but at this time, he still remembers to take good care of me, and even tried to stand up and send me to the hospital. down the mountain.
"Ayan, let's call..." I took out my phone, and finally remembered that I could call Li Liang and the others for help.
But the next moment, I was leaning on the side of the tree trunk, but I was hugged by Ah Yan through the waist.He glanced back at his wheelchair, as if he was considering whether he could put me up and push me down the hill.
But he also remembered the subconscious disgust in my eyes when I saw this wheelchair for the first time, and he just took me down the mountain without saying a word.
My arms were tightly wrapped around Ah Yan's neck, and every time he took a step, I felt anxious.And I can also feel the effort of Ah Yan to send me down the mountain. There are large drops of sweat rolling down his neck, and the sticky sweat smell squeezes out the refreshing woody fragrance.
The broken hair on his forehead was wet, his eyes looked wet, and his lips gradually lost their color.
My body was swept by the heat wave, and I felt that the temperature of my body was getting higher and higher. The little sobriety I had left forced me to hug Yan's neck tightly and not let go.
"Ayan, if it doesn't work, you can just let me down? I can do it myself..."
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