About the fact that I accidentally turned my sister into a cripple

Chapter 427 I don't need it

The sun was setting and the sky was a fiery orange.The neon lights of the city are lit up, and the streets under the high-rise buildings are gradually covered by the afterglow of the sunset.In the golden veil, people and cars come and go, interweaving together the prosperity and hustle and bustle of the international city
"The school's infirmary is still very particular, and the windows are all in the right position for a good view."

Hearing the voice behind her, the girl on the hospital bed closed her eyes, and the setting sun falling in from the window reflected her outward facing face softly and brightly.

"The scenery is good scenery, but the people are not good people."

"But you were unconscious in the afternoon, and this villain in front of you carried you back here." Sakakihara Le handed the freshly peeled green apple to the girl.

Tianhai Qimingyue's eyes only stayed on this apple within reach for a second, "It's just going upstairs on my back, as if it is a great favor that must be repaid in this life."

Sakakihara Raku's hand hovered in mid-air for more than ten seconds, and could only retract it in the end.

He sliced ​​the apple with a fruit knife, put it into his mouth, and said while eating:
"Indeed, it's an insignificant matter. This kind of trivial matter can't prove anything. The school doctor said that you didn't rest well and you suffered from heat stroke, so you passed out suddenly. Ruri, Yuki, and Suzu all came to see you just now. Zhixue went out to buy the apples, and she dared not face you."

"Sakakihara-san."

"I am listening."

"In the past month, you have cared about me many times like this, including but not limited to suddenly coming to deliver water when I was thirsty, and learning from my sister that I couldn't eat enough to cook for me alone. But it's a pity, In my opinion, these are meaningless entanglements. Whether they came to me out of nowhere last night, or carried me to the infirmary without my consent at noon today."

Tianhai Qimingyue's voice was not cold.

More like flat. Flat without ups and downs.
She closed her eyes again.

"I know you guys want to apologize to me, but it's a pity that your apology seems to me to be hard work without sincerity."

"Sincerity means sending Zhixue back to Tianhai's family?"

"otherwise?"

"That's a pity, July, I won't send Zhixue back. Send her back in her current state, what state do you think she will be in? Will she be very happy?"

"At least--"

With a serious face, Sakakihara immediately interrupted her:

"At least it's better than being by my side? About this, in July, you can ask Zhixue's true heart, does she want to stay by my side, or go back to that home? If Zhixue said she wanted to go back, would she She is truly voluntary, without any hesitation in saying that she wants to leave, why should I not let her go?"

"It doesn't matter who—"

"Look who caused it? July, I don't want to discuss too much on this point. When Zhixue first moved in, did you really care about her? I know you are all busy with your own affairs, but just In fact, when Zhixue faced difficulties, which one of you really cared?

"I remember Uncle Ying said to us when he sent Zhixue over, and we agreed to treat Zhixue like a family member. But in fact? Did one of you teach her how to live? You had one at the beginning Do you express condolences to her in food and clothing?
"I will always do these things at home, and only Liuli is willing to help me.

"I know, you can attribute this to 'she will do it by herself', but please don't forget that Zhixue is a child born with defects, she can't do too many things."

"Is this what you said?" Tianhai Qimingyue didn't change her face.

"It's not a rhetoric, it's just an explanation for what you just said in July. Don't you know these things in July? How can you use this as an example?"

Tianhai Qimingyue lowered her head, her head was still a little groggy, she didn't know why she said those inexplicable words just now, she knew that she really couldn't refute this.

When Zhixue fell in love with someone, several members of the family were responsible.

It's one thing for Zhixue to like someone, but it's another thing for someone to choose to respond and violate what she promised.

Tianhai Qimingyue took a deep breath, "I never cared whether Zhixue likes you or not. It's just that someone now has no integrity at all."

"I'm trying to apologize."

"Oh, as I said, your apology is only hard work, without any sincerity."

"I won't agree to the sincerity you said in July."

"Then you think your apology is an apology?"

The communication between the two fell into a long silence at the same time.

Sakakihara Raku stared at the shadow elongated by the setting sun outside the window, feeling that time was passing so slowly
"Sakakihara-san."

Hearing Qi Mingyue's voice, Sakakihara did not look up.

"Don't you think you are annoying now?"

"Is that so?" Sakakihara continued to lower her head.

"It's annoying, it's annoying to apologize, it's annoying to give gifts, it's annoying to come to me hypocritically, it's annoying to force me to come here. No matter what angle you look at, you are just an irresponsible scumbag now."

Sakakibara lowered her head, listening to Qi Mingyue's neither salty nor weak voice.

What, he wondered, caused the present situation?
What made July say such things to herself
At first, I just liked Liuli and after being entangled by Qiyue, I somehow remembered the encounter with her in the past.

Because I made a promise to Qiyue in the past, I am sorry for her now, so I have to shoulder the responsibility to her. And during this period, I felt the dedication of Qiyue to myself, so I fell in love with her
But there is no doubt. This again conflicted with Liuli, who was completely dependent on herself.

The two sisters started to quarrel with each other because of relationship problems.

We quarreled with each other for a long, long, long time.
As for himself, he was caught between the two sisters.

On the one hand, she has to face Liuli's reliance, and on the other hand, she has to face Qiyue's infinite love for herself.

I didn't want them to get hurt, and I didn't want them to hide in a corner and be sad one by one in the future, so I wanted to take full responsibility and let them get hurt again and again.

And I... also have to run back and forth between the two of them, taking care of their feelings.

Why not let them voluntarily rely on themselves like a strong man?

Sakakihara can only answer. What they seek from themselves has never been "strength". What they need has never been a single emotional sustenance.

As for emotional sustenance, even if Sakakibara completely controlled the Tianhai family, it would be useless.

What they care about is whether a person will understand and take care of their feelings. Then they will give more and more responses.

There is no doubt that they are good girls.

They are also worth entrusting for a lifetime.

but why?
Sakakihara suddenly felt that she seemed to be living among them, and she needed to be responsible for this and that. She seemed to have given them too many unrealistic feelings.

On the one hand, let them fall in love with themselves infinitely, but I can't give them all the feelings they want.

"I want to hear your speech, why did you accept Zhixue?"

Sakakihara tried to capture some information from Qi Mingyue's face, but unfortunately, there was only paleness after waking up from a coma.

"As you said in July just now, be responsible."

"Then you don't have to be responsible for me and my sister?"

"Of course, we must."

"Then?" Tianhai Qimingyue looked at the floating clouds outside the window, "And then you said that to my sister and me a month ago?"

"It's all responsible, July Xue needs someone to sympathize, you can assume the identity of Xue Xue and think about it—"

Tianhai Qimingyue sighed, "I've had enough of your rhetoric, 'empathize'. Sakakihara-san, why, why do you have to empathize? My position, why do I have to empathize?"

".July, I don't think you would say such a thing." Sakakihara smiled at her, and grabbed another apple from the dinner plate, "Would you like an apple? I'll peel it for you, it's delicious of."

"Why? Sakakihara-san, now I just feel that you are taking advantage of the relationship between us and kidnapping me. In addition, I now feel that you always smile in front of me after doing those things, which is very fake .”

Qi Mingyue's tone became more and more flat.

Plain to the point that Sakakibara is exhausted
Even the setting sun falling on the palm of my hand feels so dim.
"Are you not satisfied with me?" The half-peeled apple stopped in his hand.

"Yes, I can't see any trust." Tianhai Qimingyue rubbed her forehead, frowned tightly, and pinched the center of her brows.

Sakakihara looked at the half-cut apple in his hand, and the fruit knife hovering above:

"... You probably didn't hear clearly when you were in a coma before, so let me say it again. When I accepted Zhixue's confession, I also rejected her. I asked Zhixue, 'Knowing that I will never agree to you in the future, are you still willing? Follow me?'. Zhixue answered as expected, she agreed, and she didn't care about it at all. She doesn't mind who I like or not, as long as I can still appear by her side, as a family member and a sister, she will It doesn't matter."

After Tianhai Qimingyue heard it, her originally uncomfortable expression disappeared instantly. She opened her eyes, paused for a second, and then closed them again after returning to her usual indifferent expression:

"What? You think this is not considered betrayal?"

"...You think it's fine. But I want to make it clear that I never wanted to see Zhixue. I just saw her suffering and wanted to give her a place suitable for her life. It turns out that Zhixue is also very happy. She needs my care, and even likes you, Liuli and Ling, she is a good girl, she chooses to quit after knowing that she is hurting others.
"I, I saw you and Liuli in Zhixue. Just as I couldn't give up on you at the beginning, I couldn't give up on Zhixue. The difference with treating you is that I understand that I can't really accept Zhixue's feelings, and I never I have never treated Zhixue as a lover, what I like will always be your feelings for me."

Tianhai Qimingyue understood what she meant, "So, if I want you to give up Zhixue completely, it is equivalent to giving up me and my sister?"

"That's it."

"Then you go."

".what?"

"Since the conflict cannot be adjusted, you can go. You don't need to apologize to me in the future, I don't need it."

Sakakihara Raku's voice suddenly became quieter. He raised his head and looked at Tianhai Qimingyue who was frowning tightly and pinching the center of his brows:

"I hope you're talking nonsense."

".I do not need."

"."

Sakakihara was silent again for quite a while.

He closed his eyes, and the setting sun shone on his face, creating a layer of warmth.

What I recall in my heart is the appearance of the past in July.

Meeting for the first time, teasing myself with black-bellied words in the literature department, watching the fireworks alone on the day of the firework festival, looking for me in the snowstorm with white hair on my head
Scenes of memories, like revolving lanterns, are recalled in my heart.

Sakakihara feels that all of this is the expression of Qiyue's liking for herself. He is also willing to respond to her liking and wants to be responsible for her.

But with my character, I can't see anyone's sad character.

Let the situation become what it is today, and no one wants to meet it.

Sakakihara suddenly stood up, "It's my fault. Maybe I shouldn't have so much sympathy in July."

"."

Tianhai Qimingyue didn't respond, maybe she didn't want to talk anymore.

"In this matter, I am sorry for you, so if you want not to be so sympathetic, I can naturally do it, if you want."

"You want an apology, that's the basic requirement."

"Yes. The most basic request, what can't you agree to?"

"You agreed?" Tianhai Qimingyue supported her aching head and looked at Sakakibara who was standing by the bed.

I don't know if it was because of the dark sky, but she felt someone's figure became a bit dark.
"I agree, since it's July, why can't I agree to your request?"

"."

Tianhai Qimingyue didn't know why her head felt so uncomfortable today, so that her head was in a mess.

She squeezed the space between her eyebrows again, and turned to look at Sakakihara Raku who stood up at some point.

He didn't smile anymore, but looked at himself with his usual indifferent eyes
"The last thing I want in my life is to quarrel with you, July. I always feel that I can smile and coax you with a cheeky face when I quarrel with you. But, July, you seem to have forgotten what our initial relationship was. I remember We have discussed countless times, I not only have sympathy for your feelings, but also the liking you got after you paid for me, since you want me, I don’t need sympathy
"That's good. July, I agreed. As you asked, maybe it was my mistake that I chose to take you home in the past. I should have left you alone at the bus stop that day. Why should I sympathize You? Why did I go up to you? Why did I show you unnecessary sympathy?
"In my hometown of Songshan City, when I accompanied you to ride the Ferris wheel, I should ignore your confession again, why do you want me to sympathize with you over and over again?

"Because you have persisted for more than ten years, you have to sympathize with your experience? What do you think is the reason? Isn't it because of my bad and good character?
"Enjoy it, because you took the initiative to be so happy to death? Of course you can think so, but after that, I only have endless regrets for Liuli, but because I sympathize with you, I have to continue to hide Liuli. It's not like I can't live without you, insert Aren't I living for you?

"In the back, and because of you, I had to wander back and forth between the two of you, sandwiched between you, taking care of your feelings back and forth, and making you happy.

"Really, July, as you said, I shouldn't sympathize with others, and I shouldn't sympathize with you, nor should I sympathize with you.

"Now. That's it. You must hate me being around you when you are sick, and you don't need me to sympathize with you and take care of you. If you want to stab me with a knife, take revenge, feel free to welcome me, I won't hide for a while. "

Sakakihara Raku didn't get angry or make any smashing movements, only a sentence of plain words
"That's it, let Liuli continue to take care of you, I'm leaving, goodbye."

He left quickly, simply and neatly.

The green apple that was on the bedside table, peeled half for her, and was still shaking slightly in the bowl
Tianhai Qimingyue looked at it in disbelief
(End of this chapter)