I am a writer in Tokyo

The thunder explosion made everything in the world quiet, and also made the Ito family, who had originally felt like they had escaped death, fall into silence.

So, was it the death of Takumi Oyamada that led to the death of this poor autistic patient?
The ju's body was trembling slightly.

He could understand the poor child's psychological activities better than anyone else present. It was a kind of despair that was like suffocation under the grip of despair, and all colors turned to black.

The wind turned into an invisible beast that could tear rags into pieces, and the rain turned into silver needles falling from the sky.

Any physical sensation would make him fall into extreme panic and anxiety, including other people's gazes, whether they fell lightly or heavily on him.

Over time, he began to become neurotic and liked to hide behind the curtains, leaving one eye exposed to observe what was happening outside.

He lost all ability to love and be loved, and of course, he also lost his qualifications to be a human being.

Perhaps he is more suitable to be the protagonist of No Longer Human than Okawa Masato, but unfortunately, he does not have the courage to pursue life like Okawa Masato. In the face of such a huge decline, he is just a poor minion who may die at any time.

Boss Ito's voice was a little low. He felt that what he did was very wrong, even though everyone was comforting him out of kindness.

"But if you don't let Xiaoshanda Zhuo Mi work, perhaps their fate will be even more miserable. Sometimes death is not a very bad result. For them, it is also a good thing to end this hell-like world early."

Everyone looked at Kitajima Koma in astonishment. It was hard to imagine that he had said such words.

After all, for any normal person, no one would choose to reject life.

What Ju said seemed more like what an elderly man with no interest in life would say, or what a patient with severe depression would say.

Oshima Kazuya was the first to realize the problem. He quickly spoke up for Kitajima. Although he knew that the writer's mental state was not so healthy, he didn't want to let everyone know about it. So he thought about it and said, "Perhaps, Kitajima is looking at it from the perspective of the suffering. He is really gentle."

After all, another way of saying this is "Just die", which does sound a bit cruel.

Boss Ito's expression did not improve much. Teacher Oshima knew that he was a good man. If he was not a good man, he might not have let Takumi Oyamada stay to work.

Mrs. Ito and the first generation did not speak. They sat in a place where the light of the house could not reach and where they could not be seen, secretly thanking for the safety of their family.

They expressed their emotions cautiously, and only the mother and daughter knew that they did not have the sad thoughts like the men under the lights. At least they did not seem so sad and sentimental in this matter.

I still remember that Mrs. Ito and the first generation kept saying peace and other things in the middle of the night.

It was raining heavily outside, covering up all audible sounds, including the relief in their hearts and of course the pity in their minds.

Under the wash of rain, all traces return to nothingness, including life.

Mr. Matsuo wanted to try to remember the traces of life and the courage to fight against fate. He first met Mr. Ito's eyes and found the sympathy in his eyes. Then he tried to say: "If we still want to do something, then go to his funeral and take a look. We missed Oyamada Takumi's, but maybe we can catch up with his son's."

"Logically speaking, we don't need to go." Someone muttered.

"Yes, logically speaking, they don't have to go, but I think this is the only proof of their family's existence in the world. I can't imagine who will press the button to trigger the spark."

"His funeral was simple, no one would care. If there was no one, the funeral would not last long. As for pressing the button, who would care about such a ritual? Not even he himself would care."

Every word written by Kazuya Oshima is brilliant.

But where is he now?

At this moment, all eyes fell on Mr. Oshima, whose every word was full of gems. Mr. Oshima laughed awkwardly, said a few words, "I'll do it," and then rushed into the heavy rain.

The taillights of the car tore open a corner of the rainy night, and then were swallowed up by the darkness again.

By the time Oshima Kazuya arrived with the news, two days had passed and the rain had not stopped.

They set out from Koma's house, picked up Boss Ito, and then headed towards their destination.

In the car, Oshima Kazuya said that he didn't know the answer very clearly, but he could find the hospital where Oyamada Takumi was treated. If he followed this line of thought, maybe it would work.

When they arrived at the hospital, they were greeted by a very young nurse.

She seemed very professional and enthusiastic. After all, apart from boss Ito who looked like a seal, the other three were all very handsome.

After taking the information handed over by Oshima Kazuya and taking a look at it, she asked several people to walk into the reception room: "Because this surname is rare, I remember it very clearly. Are you looking for him?"

"But this is not guaranteed. This gentleman has not appeared since he came once a few months ago. I was the one who received him at that time."

"He has a son." Mr. Matsuo said that it would be better to leave such matters involving the patient's privacy to a lawyer.

The nurse was stunned for a moment, then nodded uncertainly and replied yes.

"We want to know about his son..." Matsuo thought about it and felt that it would not be a good idea to leave the body there, so he changed the way he put it: "Some things require his son..."

"I'm sorry." The nurse's words startled everyone, and they all thought that they might have missed the opportunity again. Then they heard her ask, "Excuse me, how did you know that he has a son?

Did he tell you guys?"

Seeing the nurse's strange expression, Ju said, "Yes, not only him, but everyone in the village said he has a son. Could this be false?"

"This is not false. He does have a son. I just don't know what's going on with you. After all, it's a bit difficult to find his son now. No, it's not possible."

Indeed, now that his son has passed away, it is of course unlikely.

Ju thought about it and decided to confess: "I heard recently that his son passed away, so we thought of going to pay our respects."

At this time, the nurse noticed that everyone was wearing black suits.

She uttered a cry, a little shocked, and then she realized something: "But his son has been dead for a long time."

Seeing everyone's expressions change suddenly, she quickly said: "His son died a long time ago. Because he suffered from depression and autism, their family life was a little unhappy. It seems that his wife also died a long time ago.

I heard that when his wife died, he was very lonely and was waiting at home alone. "

"Yes, Mr. Takumi Oyamada died while he was working away from home," said Koma.

"Did he go out to work?" The nurse sighed and said, "No, it was Takumi Koyamada who brought his child here for treatment. The situation at that time did not allow his child to be discharged from the hospital for treatment, so a guardian was required to accompany him all the time.

So Takumi Oyamada worked in a nearby town to raise funds because his son needed to be hospitalized for a long time.

Later it was said that his wife also died due to some circumstances. After he returned, his son seemed to sense something. He was very restless that night. He looked very manic and his emotions fluctuated greatly.

In the morning, the cleaner found him dead from suffocation because his collar was locked around his throat due to his twisted body.

When Oyamada Takumi returned from attending to his wife’s funeral, he learned of his child’s death.”

The nurse sighed. She had witnessed a lot of suffering in the hospital, but never such a tragic situation. It was as if one family had swallowed all the suffering in the world.

"So, he went on to finish the child's funeral."

"But everyone says that his son lives in the city, and he has been working to support his children." Boss Ito looked unhappy.

Not only Boss Ito, but everyone had a gloomy face.

"Yes, then he developed hysteria and always felt that his child was still alive," the nurse continued.

It was at this time that Ju realized that the nurse remembered Takumi Oyamada not because of his rare surname, but because of his story.

Such tragedy is still fresh in the memory of everyone.

"He always felt that his child was alive and living in the hospital, and his memory stayed when he returned to the countryside." The nurse paused, her eyes reddened a little: "We are reluctant to cure him, but we have to.

Because Mr. Oyamada Takumi will still pay. "

The money paid was probably for his son's medical expenses.

Ju didn't say this out loud.

After the nurse finished speaking, there was silence in the room for a long time. The light above the head became sticky.

They didn't know how they walked out of the hospital and got into the car. They only remembered that the nurse asked how Oyamada Takumi was doing, and that he still had a lot of money left in the hospital account, and asked them to let them know if they met him.

The sky outside was terribly gloomy and the rain was falling all the way from here to Tokyo.

But Koma felt that this rain should have fallen throughout Oyamada Takumi's life.

The car window was flying on the highway, and a flying insect outside was clinging to the glass without moving, its tiny body shivering in the cold wind. Even though spring had come or even passed, it still faced death at this time when life was taking off.

The steep hillside opposite the window was covered with unknown flowers, swaying in the wind, glowing dazzling white. Although the white was blinding, it also looked like an unpredictable transparent thing soaring in the summer sky.

After a while, Ju slowly uttered two words: suffering.

These two words triggered a very uniform response of "What" from everyone in the car. It was obvious that they did not hear clearly.

Then, Ju said, “I want to write something.”

"Yes, you should write something." Oshima Kazuya had wanted Koma to write something a long time ago. Now that he is willing to write, he will not say things like "it's too late" or "it's useless." It is rare for someone to be willing to use words to mourn the suffering.

If this person is Kitajima Koma, it would be a good thing.

"So, the name is Passion?"

Ju leaned against the car window and hummed softly.

No one followed up with any flattering words, and the car fell into silence again.

Boss Ito did not clap like he did before. He seemed to have become much quieter. Perhaps it was incongruous for a restaurant manager who only knew how to grill and cook on weekdays to suddenly experience the meaning of life.

After returning home, Ju disappeared from public view for a long time.

When Oyamada Takumi's affairs were turned into files and put into the display room, it meant that all his affairs here were over and would never be used again; when the Ito family's tavern was finally renovated and reopened, Koma appeared.

He looked like he came from a land of suffering, with disheveled hair, a gray face, and a haggard appearance.

The diligent Mr. Miyai poured a cup of hot water for Koma, saying, "I heard about that incident. It is an honor for him that you can write something."

He pondered in his mind, and thought of a sentence he had heard the editors say before: "Many people will sing praises of life at special times, and of course there are more people who will sing praises of suffering, but there are very few who can tell the stories of those who are defeated by suffering.

They do not have any shining points in human nature, nor do they reveal some so-called great principles that need to be fought against.

He is suffering, everyone is suffering, thank you for writing about everyone.”

Mr. Miyai heaved a sigh of relief. It was not easy to piece together these words. For him, it was much more difficult than bearing the responsibility behind the word "security guard".

He likes the feeling of hearing profound truths come out of his mouth, and he also likes the feeling of standing together, transcending the level of life and looking down on life.

In any case, at this moment, he and the writer are on the same level.

Koma thanked him quietly, then followed Oshima Kazuya, who had been running all the way, into the trendy office area.

They have a lot to do.

Next, they will tell the life story of a poor guy on a pile of papers.

Then, let everyone know about this person and the suffering that suffocated him. (End of this chapter)