Crosstalk: Stop playing with your uncle!

Chapter 57: Fenhe Bay

When it came to the main show, the two of them divided the roles. Qi Long brought a handkerchief to play the female role of Liu Yinhuan, and Dong Qianglai played the male role of Xue Rengui.

"What is the relationship between these two characters?" Qi Long asked, not understanding.

Gao Dongqiang answered: "Husband and wife relationship!"

Qi Long suddenly realized: "You are my husband (yes), and I am your mother!"

"Isn't that right, mother? You are my wife!"

"Oh, I'm your wife, but let's make it clear. I'm your wife on stage, but I won't go home with you off stage. We pay one price for being on stage, and another price for taking you home!"

"Nonsense, I don't want it, let's just play husband and wife on stage!"

There was laughter from the audience, even from the stage.

Lao Guo and Yu Qian were also happy backstage, and Yu Qian waved and asked someone to give them both a point.

"Qi Long has really learned the essence of Hou Shu. He always remembers to shape the characters from various details and even makes jokes. Extra points for that!" Yu Qian commented.

"Hahahahahahaha, I guarantee that there will be a burden about being a prostitute later on!" Lao Guo smiled!

Lao Guo guessed right. After Dongqiang finished speaking, Qi Long nodded.

"Then I feel relieved. We'll play husband and wife on stage. It's a deal. Let me ask you one more question!" Qi Long asked again.

Dong Qiang nodded: "You say!"

"There are no intense emotional scenes in this play, such as kissing scenes and sex scenes. I sell my art, not my body!" Qi Long asked seriously.

Gao Dongqiang: "Do you understand? There is no sex scene in opera without sex scenes!"

"That's fine without it," Qi Long breathed a sigh of relief, and then leaned over to Gao Dongqiang who was about to move the table and said, "Actually, if you give more, you can add a sex scene!"

"Aren't you selling your art but not your body?" Gao Dongqiang wondered.

"The price you're offering is an offer I can't refuse. I can add some punctuation to that sentence!"

"How to add it?"

"Busking question mark, not comma, selling body exclamation mark (Busking? No, selling body!)"

"No, let's just sing a play!"

"Row!"

The two moved the crosstalk table and distinguished the front and back stages. Qi Long also wrapped a handkerchief on his head to represent that he was a woman. The two officially began the performance of "Fenhe Bay". Gao Dongqiang told Qi Long that his character should be called first.

Dongqiang held a fan and blocked Qi Long's face. Qi Long blinked and looked out from behind the fan, his eyes seductive and his face very funny, which made people laugh.

Gao Dongqiang blocked it again, and Qi Long exposed himself again, not only from one side, but also from top to bottom, left to right, and he even blinked seductively.

Every time she looks delicate and charming, and her movements can be referred to the Jade Rabbit Fairy in Journey to the West, when she says, "Hoha, hoha, who sent you to me?" and the beautiful woman suddenly appears from various obstructions.

"What are you doing?" Gao Dongqiang hit Qi Long on the head with a fan.

Qi Long was also angry after being hit: "Why do you always block my way? Block the light, block the light, you can't just block me and not let me shine!"

This was an impromptu joke based on Gao Dongqiang's previous impromptu question. Dongqiang himself almost laughed out loud. He pinched the fan so hard that it hurt his fingers: "That's not about blocking the light. I have to block it. It's like a door curtain. You are shouting from behind the curtain!"

Qi Long suddenly realized: "Oh, I haven't appeared yet!"

"That's right, listen to the voice before you hear the person!"

Qi Long expressed his understanding and stood behind the curtain. He didn't say anything for a long time. Dong Qiang urged him: "Why don't you scream!"

"what is it call?"

"You don't remember?"

"I know so much and suddenly forgot it. Please remind me. Just remind me what the first word is. No need to be specific, just give me a hint!"

"Name!" Gao Dongqiang gave a hint.

Qi Long shouted, "Qi Qi! Number 38!"

The repeated number 38 caused laughter as soon as it opened its mouth. Gao Dongqiang waited for the laughter to die down and then hurriedly shouted, "It's your son's name!"

Qi Long shouted behind the fan: "Gao Dongqiang!" The laughter that had just stopped sounded again.

"Go away, why are you still taking advantage of me? I was talking about the name of your son in the play, Ding Shaner, and I said Ding Shaner is coming soon!" Gao Dongqiang told him everything.

After all the words were spoken, Qi Long successfully finished this challenging segment. Gao Dongqiang put away the fan and Qi Long walked out.

Dong Qiang reminded: "You have to be more feminine. You are a female role now, so you need to show feminine characteristics."

Qi Long impatiently said that he understood, and walked to the front of the stage shyly. Dong Qiang began to imitate the sound of a musical instrument by making clanging sounds with his mouth.

Qi Long was so shy, he stretched out his hands and held them in front of his chest, shaking them left and right.

"What are you doing?"

"It's a very popular dance. Ladies, raise your hands to your chest and clean the glass with me. Clean, clean, clean the glass!"

"That's not it!" Gao Dongqiang hurried over to stop them: "That's wrong, we are doing opera, start over!"

The second time, Qi Long performed a sexy dance: "Touch under the legs, shake head and stand up, squat, pull in legs, bend waist and touch legs and stand up."

Dongqiang called him back again: "Don't do these nonsense, just do the opera movements!"

The third time, Qi Long didn't do anything weird, but he couldn't sing the lyrics. After Dong Qiang finished the beatboxing instrumental accompaniment, Qi Long was still stunned on the stage. Dong Qiang reminded him from behind: "The lyrics, say the lyrics! The lyrics for when you're on stage!"

Qi Long understood, put his hands on his abdomen, and bent down slightly: "Hello, I'm No. 38 Qi Qi, from Beichun City, Jilin Province!"

This is the fixed line when the hostesses come on stage, usually standing in a row!
I heard someone in the audience shout, "Change the group!"

The already hilarious scene became even more laughter-filled because of this audience member's interruption. Qi Long stared at the audience in astonishment.

Dong Qiang came up and said, "I'm sorry, sir, we have already had our turn today. This is the only trouble left!"

With this connection, the laughter continued.

Qi Long grabbed Dong Qiang and said, "Foreman, kick him out. Last time, he and Guo Degang drank with me and they didn't pay me!"

The audience burst into laughter. Gao Dongqiang pushed Qi Long away and said, "Fuck you. Am I the foreman? We are singing a play now. Why are you introducing yourself? Sing the lyrics?"

"What word?"

Dongqiang spread his hands: "Well, I can't do that."

After another teaching session, Qi Long's segment finally ended. Then Xue Rengui, played by Gao Dongqiang, came in and asked Liu Yinhuan where this was to confirm that he had not come to the wrong place. He then asked if she knew Liu Yinhuan.

"Sister-in-law, the daughter of Mr. Liu, the wife of Xue Rengui, Liu Yinhuan!"

Qi Long asked: "What silver ring?"

"Liu Yinhuan!"

"Liu Yin what?"

"Liu Yinhuan!"

"What's the ring?"

"Liu Yinhuan!" Gao Dongqiang shouted loudly into Qi Long's ear.

Qi Long pretended to be surprised: "Female?"

"Nonsense, can Xue Rengui's wife be a man?"

"No women!"

"what?"

"Our foreman said that all the women have left the stage, and I am the only one left!"