The Boss Medicine of Quick Transmigration is Coming

Chapter 99
(This extra episode is from 单啦啦啦啦啦啦啦, thank you, little cutie~)

(1) The world is very interesting, the boring one is me
I have the love of my parents, the admiration of others, and a wealthy family that others cannot envy... I have walked through all kinds of praise since I was a child. In order to keep these expectations of my parents, I am very happy try hard...

I should be very happy... But why do I want to leave so much?I don't know, but I really want to leave, leave home, leave here and leave this world...

After trying my best, I finally left, leaving the place full of expectations for me.When I came to a new place, I couldn't help thinking easily: I will live better here. I told myself: everything will be fine.In the end, it can be regarded as a clear recognition of the reality, and all this is just my delusion.But why the reality is always unsatisfactory. It may be because I always love to think that everything will be better.Oh, it's the same everywhere, and the same annoys me.Gradually, I became obsessed with pain. Every time I feel so heavy that I feel as if I have drowned, pain can help me, it can make me feel that I am...alive.

In the new school it was the same as usual, and I continued to play a perfect role. "Are you so happy?" I asked myself. "It should be happy..."

Looking for a noon, I walked up to the roof and stepped on it.Looking at all kinds of frolicking people below, why don't you envy, yearn for, or want to blend in?I also want to sway the sweat of youth wantonly like this, but I am as afraid of light as a mouse in the gutter.A mouse is a mouse after all, and will always be afraid of light, let alone see it.Maybe you will only see the sun in your dreams.Just looking at it like this and thinking about it, I suddenly felt that jumping from here might be the best result for me...

Walking forward uncontrollably, there is no trace of fear, only despair.At this moment, someone rushed over and stopped me to persuade me. When I denied it coldly, he even said, "No one knows better than me what it feels like before committing suicide. You can't fool me." I was so moved that I began to be curious about your experience, and it actually produced a feeling of longing to be understood, which is really ridiculous..
(2) I never felt beautiful in the world until I met you
I thought you were just my imagination, but I didn't expect to meet again.I thought of many ways to say hello to you: smiling politely, shaking hands with a little rustiness, or waving enthusiastically, and then patting you on the shoulder carelessly. look away.But I can't help observing your every move, this is probably what I yearn for.How can you understand my mouse's feelings like this? It's really a fantasy...Everything loves the sun, and so do I. I can't help but lean into you. I can't stop missing you.

When I was suffering, you suddenly came to me and told me: You can help me, you can help me get rid of this!Excited, how can I not be excited!I want to get rid of the present, and stand beside you openly. I hope this is not a delusion. You live with me in a daze, and you are happy, but you are afraid that you will see that I am not as good or outstanding as outsiders say. Will go will leave. No!I can't accept such a result!Then I couldn't help but feel ridiculous: the mouse is indeed a mouse, even the thoughts are so dirty. Living in the gutter, I can't stop looking up at the sky and longing for the sun, it's really sad and deplorable.
Maybe you are an angel sent by God to redeem me. Every time I feel desperate, you will always stroke my hair and say softly: "It's okay, cry when you want to cry, laugh when you want to laugh, get angry when you are not happy, don't want to Just give up, this is your life, no one can force you, no one.” Yes, this is my life but why is it always out of control. With your company, I slowly began to find that I like I missed you. Maybe it was to stand with you who are as bright as a star. I started to work hard to become better... Really, it’s really good to have someone I like. I still want to work hard for you when my world is collapsing. a handful.

Maybe God has pity on me as a bedbug. I gradually got better and began to return to the sun, and I couldn't leave you more and more.Gradually, you have grown up, and you have really become an "angel in white" to save other people. You have become a doctor with a high reputation and are busy with various patients all day long, and we spend less and less time together.I admit that I am uncomfortable and unhappy, but I will still support you, because that is what you love. Every time I see you complete one operation after another and successfully save lives, there is joy everywhere, but I only care about Distressed...

It is human nature to be greedy, and I am.Gradually, I began to be dissatisfied with the present moment: I want to protect you and own you, and I don’t want you to be distracted by other people and things (even if that’s what you love). My body and mind are clamoring: I want to possess You have your all, I think you are mine, you must be mine... so selfish I think "love" is:

unavoidable
Hard to harvest
Forever
trying to possess
This nasty idea followed me for the rest of my life and I still couldn't realize it.

I just waited for you for the rest of my life and followed you for the rest of my life, neither disturbing nor giving up. Maybe this is the condition for me to return to the sun, people can’t always be too greedy...

(3) If you are in my dream, I will never sleep forever
On the day we first met, the cloud was beautiful and the wind was gentle. I watched you fall in love with the world...

I wish you and I were ordinary people, had ordinary encounters, ordinary acquaintances, ordinary love, met together from black hair to white hair...

…I often fantasize about:

It would be great if we just have the love of ordinary people... From the beginning of acquaintance to knowing each other and loving each other, and then living with you in a small town, sharing endless dusks and endless bells.It will be in the evening of summer, on a sunny day, with flowers blooming beside you. You are wearing a white dress and smiling brightly, while I watch silently and follow with a smile.We can also enjoy a quiet and peaceful old age together and experience the happiness of four generations living under one roof.They will also lazily sit on rocking chairs, teasing each other about the joys and regrets of the past:
You, you may say that you want to have new dreams in your life, and have simple expectations in the simple years; I said that I think my youth is clean and without ups and downs, just like the sunrise and sunset that follow the rules and give all strangers indifferently Man smiles and is happy.I also want to have a satisfied heart for the rest of my life, and have ordinary growth in the stable years...

If I can do it all over again, I will stand in a place where there is light, blue sky, white clouds, and a gentle breeze to meet you, and wait for the street lights to come on in the long night, and when people from house to house are gradually falling asleep, I will secretly say I love you...

Send you the love of the whole universe from ancient times to eternity:
I hope that the green hills are late autumn

For whom does the magpie cry?

happy as you like

If you have love, wait for dawn

——To Xi Fan
(The outline you left unintentionally, but I spent my whole life tracing it... no regrets)
(End of this chapter)