Bamboo Forest Manager

Rationality and Emotion

“…Hey Seo-ya, I heard it’s exam period. Are you having a tough time?”

The cafe was bustling with people.

At Choi Yi-seo’s question from across the table, Oh Yoon-ji tilted her head slightly.

“No? Why?”

Although it was exam period, this final term had been relatively relaxed overall.

Usually spending much time with Kim Woo-jin had helped him allocate his study hours effectively.

In fact, because he reviewed until late before exams started, he felt quite at ease during the actual exam period itself.

“You don’t look very happy.”

“…”

“Your face looks rather gloomy. Since I called you here, I feel like I should listen to your worries.”

“Did you call me here for counseling?”

Despite the crowd in the cafe, it felt quiet enough to be considered serene.

Many students had chosen this cafe as their study spot. Unintentionally perhaps but due to exams season changing its usual atmosphere of the place significantly.

Choi Yi-seo pointed that out as he continued speaking,

“You call a college student during exams for counseling?”

“You said yourself you were relaxed. Besides knowing Choi Yi-seo well enough made me think you could handle this much.”

“…”

“And if it really was too hard on you; unlike before—you would have declined.”

That was true indeed.

The old Choi Yi-seo who couldn’t refuse friends or get swept away by circumstances no longer existed.

“You’ve always been like this since back then.”

Proactive might be the word for it.

Always acting confidently with herself at the center—this attitude of Oh Yoon-ji’s was both her strength and flaw.

It was not strange that she naturally became the center of the group.

“……Well.”

But people change as they age.

At a glance, Yoonji’s expression seemed to have lost some of the confidence she had in the past.

Of course, it was only a year or two older, but still.

“What kind of advice do you need?”

Choi Iseo deliberately overlooked it and glossed over the matter vaguely.

Yoonji had always hated others seeing her weaknesses; it was a kind of consideration on her part.

“Why is that?”

But Oh Yoonji asked Choi Iseo for a reason instead.

“You don’t need to know.”

“Is it something I don’t need to know, or is it better not knowing?”

“It’s better not knowing.”

“It’s about Woojin, isn’t it?”

Having a friend who was too perceptive was always something to reconsider.

Especially since Choi Iseo had absolutely no talent for lying.

“Cough, let’s just move on.”

Eventually realizing he couldn’t hide it any longer, Choi Iseo tried to be considerate in his response.

“Tell me. Maybe I can help.”

“…Isn’t it somewhat inappropriate to ask your ex-girlfriend about such things?”

Faced with his ethical concerns, Oh Yoonji paused for a moment.

Was she organizing her thoughts or calming her emotions?

Choi Iseo didn’t know how far along she got with that process.

“So you’re okay if I don’t help then?”

Upon hearing Yoonji’s words, Choi Iseo sighed deeply.

He thought he would appreciate her help indeed,

Wanting desperately to share these frustrating feelings with someone else,

“It’s okay.”

But what wasn’t right remained so.

Still standing firm and straightening his back as he replied; although his voice trembled when saying “it’s okay,” confirming once again that he lied.

Oh Yun-ji didn’t press any further.

Choi Yi-seo was always like this.

“When reason and emotion clash, you always let reason win.”

“…Is that a compliment?”

“Maybe.”

Suddenly, Oh Yun-ji wondered what it would be like to be with Kim Woo-jin, but she decided it must be their secret and let it go.

“Should I talk about my concern then?”

“Yes, tell me. That’s why I came here.”

It must be a rather serious topic if she’s making such a fuss about it.

“This vacation, you agreed to work with us.”

“Yes, that’s right.”

“I was thinking of changing the job role. What do you think?”

“…That was your concern?”

It seemed surprisingly trivial.

“What do I need to do?”

“All our company’s broadcasters lack exercise. So I thought maybe you could help out.”

“Why not hire professional trainers for that?”

“Sigh, that’s the problem. The broadcasters all have different waking times and schedules for coming in and leaving work,” she explained her grievances about their irregular lives.

“So hiring a personal trainer is tricky too. Everyone has different schedules, and sometimes they can’t even wake up at the agreed time.”

“Oh.”

“You’re not a professional trainer but you’ve been exercising for a long time. Min-ji told me you even took some BAPF photos. Could you show me some?”

“…I’ll choose some pictures.”

Some were taken in suggestive poses.

She needed to pick ones that were more ordinary and less revealing.

Picking just one photo from her phone for Choi Yi-seo to see elicited an “Oh.” from him as he exclaimed in surprise.

Expecting some sort of comment on the photo itself, he quickly switched back to business talk instead.

With her head bowed in humility, Oh Yun-ji began speaking softly,

“To be honest, the cost of hiring trainers is also an issue. That’s why I’m asking for your help.”

“Hmm, is it okay to speak so frankly about this?”

“I know this approach works best with you, right? You think logically, but you’re weak when it comes to emotional requests from others.”

Weak indeed.

But it wasn’t wrong to say so, and I didn’t feel too bad about it.

“I’ll pay you much more than Minji. Plus, you won’t have to do any menial tasks; just manage the kids’ exercise routines.”

“Well, that’s not too bad.”

It wasn’t just ‘not bad’; it was actually quite good.

Personally, I loved exercising and getting paid to do it with others was a bonus.

“Right? I’ll even get you a membership at the gym near our company building. They have great equipment there. I go work out sometimes myself.”

Listening to Yoonji made me start looking forward to it even more.

Choi Eseo was browsing through photos of the gym’s interior and its equipment on her phone in amazement when she realized,

“Oh no.”

She had been so engrossed that she had neglected Yoonji. Lifting her head,

“Yoonji?”

“……”

Something was off.

Her eyes were open but seemed fixed on something beyond this place, distant and unfocused.

No matter how many times Choi Eseo called her name amidst the murky haze of confusion, there was no response.

“Yoonji?!”

“Huh-? Oh!?”

Startled into awareness by my shaking and calling out her name, Yoonji finally took a deep breath as if she had forgotten even to breathe.

“What’s wrong? Are you hurt? Why did you space out all of a sudden?”

“No, no. It’s nothing.”

Yoonji smiled as if dismissing any concerns over nothing significant at all while Choi Eseo genuinely worried for her; however, Yoonji deliberately changed the subject,

“Anyway. Once summer break starts take a couple days off then come in for work with Minji.”

“……”

“It’s fine really. Just tired and dozed off for a bit.”

Could that really be called just nodding off?

It didn’t merely feel like fatigue.

The body of Oh Yun-ji was here, but her mind seemed to have drifted off somewhere, leaving behind a hollow sensation.

There was a thought that it might be more natural if she never woke from this state.

Oh Yun-ji finishes her story about herself with a laugh, as if rejecting it altogether.

“That’s all for now. Please take care during the break. The kids in our group are all pretty easy-going.”

“Okay…”

“And…”

Oh Yun-ji slowly rises from her seat.

Choi Yi-seo had planned to just study and leave from the beginning, so she looks up at her while remaining seated.

“As a senior, let me give you a piece of advice.”

Senior.

The word itself brought a bitter smile to Choi Yi-seo’s lips due to its resonance and meaning.

“If you’re still pondering over something, it means there’s lingering attachment. If you’re regretting something, it means there’s still love.”

“…”

“Blaming each other or fighting…all these things can only happen when you’re together.”

Oh Yun-ji’s clear voice pierced Choi Yi-seo’s heart deeply.

“No one knows what kind of ending awaits after time has passed.”

Watching Oh Yun-ji walk away, Choi Yi-seo mulled over the words she had offered as advice.

“Sigh.”

It wasn’t that Choi didn’t know about whatever was going on between Oh Yun-ji and Kim Woo-jin.

She wanted to ask something desperately:

Was it really okay for her relationship with Kim Woo-jin to have evolved into this?

But…

Choi Yi-seo lacked the courage to go that far.

What remained was a heavy lump in her chest.

“Sigh.”

She wanted to lighten her complicated thoughts.

Meeting Oh Yun-ji had made everything feel even more chaotic for her.

Before she knew it, her fingers were tapping out on the phone—a number they had memorized and deleted several times before.

A moment later,

“Gasp! Gasp! Is that you Seo?!”

Breathless as if he had ridden a bicycle, Kim Woojin stood before her.

“You said it was okay to be late.”

Choi Yiseo tried to hide her gloomy mood, but he responded with a bright smile.

“I wanted to see you early.”

Despite his simple words, she felt the damp knots in her heart begin to loosen.

Kim Woojin casually took the seat next to her.

She had called him over to return his clothes, and just as she was about to take them out of the bag,

Kim Woojin gently caught her hand that was reaching for the bag.

No further words were exchanged.

He cautiously held her hand as if asking for permission, then calmly approached Choi Yiseo and embraced her warmly.

“……!”

No other words were needed.

That was simply it.

She wanted to ask if something unusual had happened because of the entirely different atmosphere,

but that wasn’t it.

What was different was herself.

“Has it been very tough?”

From Kim Woojin’s voice flowed not forgiveness or apology, but consolation.

Perhaps because of that,

Choi Yiseo found herself hugging him tightly without realizing it and nodded slightly in his embrace.

“What made it so hard?”

“Because of you.”

“That hurts.”

Though she couldn’t see his face buried in his chest, he seemed likely smiling bitterly.

“It’s complicated; my head is so muddled that it hurts.”

Was not forgiving Kim Woojin wrong?

Was meeting Yunji wrong?

Or should she have strongly denied such a relationship from the start and left?

Various thoughts crossed her mind.

“Just say whatever comes to mind.”

At Kim Woojin’s words, Choi Iseo spoke her first thought.

From noble mtl dot come

“Bad guy.”

“Cough, what else?”

“How could you do that with Arin while saying you were studying? What would happen to my trust in you if you lied?”

“I have no excuses. What else?”

“I waited to eat lunch with you because I wanted to be together. But then you spent time with Yerin?”

“…Ah, is there more?”

“Idiot. Annoying. Why do you make things so hard for me?”

“What else?”

“If you’re going to mess around while dating three people, shouldn’t you handle it better?”

“It’s also my first time dating three people. What else?”

“It’s embarrassing doing this at the cafe.”

“It’s okay; we’re in a corner where no one can see us. Everyone is busy studying anyway. Anything else?”

“…It feels good being with you after a long time.”

“Me too.”

“Why did you suddenly hug me?”

“You looked like you were struggling?”

“Why are your instincts only good at times like this?”

“I don’t want to lose them?”

“Don’t answer a question with another question.”

“Sorry.”

“I want us to have dinner together.”

“Let’s eat something delicious, your favorite.”

“There’s really nothing between Yoonji and me anymore?”

“It’s over now.”

“Is this really okay? Yoonji is my friend and she’s your ex-girlfriend.”

“It’s not Oh Yoonji’s friend and Oh Yoonji’s ex-boyfriend meeting; it’s Choi Iseo and Kim Woojin meeting each other.”

“I know letting go of the idea of ‘us’ would be easiest on my heart.”

“While I respect your choice, I will keep trying not to let go.”

Choi Yiseo kept her lips tightly sealed.

Looking down at her, Kim Woojin smiled broadly.

“Is it over?”

“……”

With each word she uttered, she felt as if the worries associated with them were disappearing.

Perhaps that was why.

What remained inside her wasn’t rational thought but an emotion close to purity.

Suddenly, she remembered what Oh Yoonji had said earlier.

You are a rational person.

In the battle between emotion and reason, reason always won.

She didn’t deny it because she knew it herself too well.

And the one who was changing that part of herself was undoubtedly the man in front of her.

Perhaps that was why.

As the tangled web of complex rational thoughts cleared away, a vivid emotion that had found her screamed wildly,

“I think I love you… incredibly, incredibly much. To the extent that I want to forgive you.”

Kim Woojin hugged Choi Yiseo a bit tighter after she murmured those words and laughed cheerfully,

“Me too.”

Usually,

Even when everything falls apart at the end,

Spilling nonsense at the very last moment,

‘Why only then?’

Feeling Kim Woojin’s lips on her forehead, Choi Yiseo let out an incredulous laugh at herself for falling once again.