Dear Freud

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Yan Xu VS An Yao.

An Yao walked into the clinic, took off his white coat, and took a paper towel to clean the water stains on his arm.

Just now, a blond boy wearing a sick uniform was running around in the corridor, accidentally hit a patient who was drinking water. Fortunately, An Yao responded quickly, picked up the boy and flashed away, but it was hot to his own. Arm.

The little boy shyly said sorry, but An Yao didn't mind and smiled at him: "it \ 'sok" Seeing the little boy was okay, An Yao quickly rolled up her sleeves and rushed to the tap, which was fine.

An Yao dried the water droplets on his arm with a tissue. When he lowered his head, he saw the faint cross scar on his hand. He was injured in the orphanage when he was a child.

At that time, there was a new little sister in the orphanage who was curious and interested in everything. He ran there and drilled here, always playing with Yang Zi.

Once, the orphanage was decorated with iron frame materials in the corners, and the two younger sisters were crawling on the shelf. An Yao saw that the shelf was going to fall down and pull them. As a result, all three had the same scar on their hands.

She did not stay in the orphanage for long, and the children there did not impress her. Because of his good grades, he was exempted from tuition fees and lived in the dormitory. He was taken care of by teachers and occasionally returned to the orphanage. But after junior high school, she vaguely felt inferiority. She didn't want to go back, so she never returned to the orphanage. Pretending that her relatives are abroad, and after finishing high school, she went abroad and reunited with her family.

She has been working very hard and finally went abroad with a full scholarship. However, there is no family, alone.

An Yao was a little trance, now that he is far away from the United States, it is likely that he will not go back in his life. It's also good, it doesn't matter, there are no people in her country who care about her.

In fact, it was the one who didn't let her care about this world.

She looked at the beautiful and calm face in the mirror and felt dead and lifeless at all times. I do n’t know if it ’s the time of low mood or something. She suddenly has a large loss and confusion in her heart. I do n’t know the meaning of her life.

Thinking, I saw someone coming in from the mirror.

An Yao turned around and saw a tall, thin man in a black slim shirt and jeans, wearing a mask, could not see his cheeks, but exposed a tall nose bridge and unusually clear and beautiful eyes.

An Yao was stunned for a long time. Those eyes were very pure and clear, like children who were not involved in the world.

Her heart knocked inexplicably.

She packed up the unexpected mood and walked over to ask, "Do you feel uncomfortable?"

He didn't speak, his dark eyes looked at her for a second, and he was vigilant and uneasy. Then he immediately avoided her eyes, and his long eyelashes dropped, covering his eyes.

This patient is so strange, An Yao thought. She tentatively asked a few more questions patiently, but he didn't respond or talk.

She thought he could not hear, and asked him with a piece of paper, asking him what was uncomfortable.

She was a little closer to him, which made him nervous again, took a hard step back, and breathed hard.

An Yao saw his breathing "difficult", frowned slightly, and said, "I will listen to your heartbeat first."

Hearing his words, he raised his eyes and stared at her stunnedly. She turned to get the stethoscope. He shook slightly, and seemed to be struggling and trying to slip away, but his feet didn't move.

An Yao quickly put on his stethoscope and approached him;

He was stunned, blinking and blinking, watching her hand touching his chest, seeing that she was about to touch it, he was trembling, hiding back conditionedly, backing up again and again. But his back hit the wall all at once.

"Eh, what are you hiding? It won't hurt." An Yao chased up and pressed the stethoscope on his left chest quickly and successfully.

"Bang! Bang! Bang!" His heart beat quickly and hard, like a drum, shaking clearly into An Yao's ear. She was startled, how could the heartbeat of a normal person be so fast?

When she was surprised, she noticed something strange. Her fingers were still pressed against his chest, and the sharp undulations and tight texture lingered around her fingertips.

Unguarded, her heart trembled slightly.

Looking up, she saw him lowering his eyes, long eyelashes drooping, flapping fans, the person was very shy, his ears were red.

An Yao lost her mind for a moment, and suddenly realized that she was too close to him, so close she could clearly feel that he was very nervous and his body was tight.

The atmosphere is subtle.

She withdrew her hand, took a step back, thought about it, and said softly: "You are a problem I have encountered."

The man in the mask didn't speak, and his dark eyes lifted up quietly to see her. When he saw her, his eyes froze, and he immediately avoided the droop.

"I can't diagnose you with any problems. Can you tell me what's wrong with you?" An Yao asked.

He still did not squeak, thought for a moment quietly, suddenly turned his feet and left.

"Hey ..." An Yao was going to chase, but the next patient came in, and she only saw his outstanding back.

This episode made An Yao feel a small ripple in her heart, and felt that there was a little fun in her life, but she didn't think much about it, until the next day after work, the male patient wearing a mask appeared Too.

On this day, he was wearing a dark casual shirt, which looked clean and moist.

When he looked up to see him, the pen in An Yao's hand paused: he came again.

She asked him where he felt uncomfortable like yesterday, he did not answer like yesterday. After 5 minutes, he left without saying hello.

The third day, the fourth day ... he came every day.

Gradually, the rippled faint watercolors in Anya's work life began to thicken; for the first time in her life, before going to bed every night, she had expectations and waiting for the next day's life.

Before the end of work, it was expected that the next patient would be him, and she couldn't help but heartbeat.

Although he didn't speak every time, she also felt inexplicably happy to see him. She thought he was deaf and mute and began to learn sign language and lip language. But he couldn't stare at her, and looked down for a second.

In order to let him see, An Yao even squatted down in front of him, forcing him to look at his gestures and lips.

That time, after a couple of seconds of staring at each other, An Yao himself felt: Uh, let him look at his mouth, this thing is really ... subtle.

Perhaps it was her behavior that surprised him. He stayed shorter than usual, jumped out of the chair in a panic, and ran away without greeting.

An Yao was frustrated, thinking he would not come again.

The next day, when she was about to get off work, she lifted her heart at once and kept looking at the door, and he did not disappoint her and appeared again.

And this time, when he left, he left a small gift on her table. Half a palm-sized square box, light purple, with a small bow tied.

The box opened, and inside was a rubber band with hair tied in it.

An Yao remembered this. When she squatted down in front of him the other day, she didn't know what to do, her rubber band was broken, her long hair fluttered at once.

Perhaps it wasn't her staring that made him uncomfortable, but the hint and change of the atmosphere when she spread her hair that made him nervous and uncomfortable.

Thinking of this, An Yao blushed for the first time.

Later, he appeared every day, and brought a small gift every day, boxes of different shapes, colorful colors, colorful gifts.

He hasn't spoken, and she feels okay, she is very happy.

Until one day, her internship period came, she should have been sitting in a meeting with other interns. The tutor spoke long and exhausted, and she looked at her watch with anxiety.

At this time, he should come.

What if someone tells him that she is an intern and will not come again?

She knew him only on the two pinyin "XuYan". If she loses contact, how can she find it?

The annual meeting is finally over, but the doctors have long been off work.

An Yao was almost sour in tears, Fei rushed out of the meeting room. He ran into the waiting area and saw the familiar figure.

The waiting room was empty, and the doctors' doors were all locked. He was the only one, not sitting.

Holding a small dark blue box, he stood in front of An Yao's door, facing the closed door, stubbornly and silently guarding.

An Yao was stunned, only to realize that she was hopeless and indifferent to the world and collapsed at that moment.

The cleaner searched the garbage bag and walked past him. He glanced at him and said that Dr. Ann is an intern, and he said why you do n’t believe it.

He was like an unreasonable child, standing stubbornly and upright, looking at An Yao's door, motionless, after a while, he was not answering the cleaner because he used Chinese.

He faced the door and the air and said, "She will come back to find me."

The voice is clear and calm, and it sounds good.

This is the first time An Yao has heard him speak, not to her, but to herself.

She will come back to find me.

An Yao has heard a question many times later on TV on magazines or in the ears of hospital nurses: Hey, when was the moment when you fell in love with someone?

Whenever this happens, An Yao will think of this scene, his quiet and stubborn back.

That day, Yan Xu didn't wear a mask. When An Yao stepped forward to see his face exactly like Yan Yan, he was stunned for a long while without much surprise and discomfort.

She knew that this was the person she liked.

On that day, Yan Xu handed the dark blue gift box dotted with stars into her hand, her eyes were drooping, nervous, shy, and intermittent, saying:

"Me, show me, my favorite, to show you."

There are two tickets for the planetarium.

That day, An Yao followed him to see the vast sky and universe.

The first time they held hands was on the steps of the Metropolitan Museum of Art. At that time, they watched the exhibition from the museum together. It was autumn and the sky was very high and blue.

An Yao stood on the long stone steps, looked at the sky, and saw migratory birds like wild geese flying across the blue sky.

She knew that Yan Xu was about to return to her country, and suddenly she had a general feeling in her heart, saying: "Why do birds have to fly far away in winter?"

Yan Xumu looked up at the flock of birds and felt that the answer to this question was clear. He replied, "If you go back, it's too far."

"..." An Yao reacted for a few seconds, and couldn't help laughing. She almost couldn't stand up straight, smiling like she hadn't been so happy in her life.

Yan Xu looked at her puzzled, unable to understand. I don't know what she is laughing at.

He walked down the steps, and An Yao still had a smile on his face, catching up and holding his hand.

He paused and looked down, holding her hand in his hand, very white and small, very beautiful ... He blinked in confusion and embarrassment and said, "Rusheng ..."

"Ah?" An Yao answered.

"..." he swallowed, and said, "You ... you took my hand."

"I know." An Yao said.

"... Oh." He didn't know what to say, and only frowned tangledly. Oh, I didn't accidentally catch it, but since I know why not let go?

His way of being caught by her and causing her to stumble, An Yao could not help but endure, she pulled him with a smile: "Go!"

And everything she gets along with in the future is she pulling him.

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