I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

An Lin felt like this was a story worthy of being savored.

“Who would have thought that their fate from the Immortal Spirit Tower would have a chance to continue…”

He looked at Xuanyuan Cheng and Shu Honglan, who were still interacting with one another, and he sighed with emotion.

Thinking back, he was still engaging in passionate brawls with War God Xing Tian and Emperor Ziwei, but Big Brother Cheng had already secured a future wife.

They were on two completely different levels…

An Lin was quite depressed with this in mind, and he clasped a hand over his chest.

“An Lin, do you also think Shu Honglan is a reincarnation of Celestial Immortal Shu Yu?” Xu Xiaolan asked with a smile.

An Lin splayed open his hands. “Big Brother Cheng clearly thinks that and Shu Honglan has admitted to it, so what can I say? My opinion doesn’t really matter at this point.”

Xu Xiaolan nodded. “Things like possession, reincarnation, and being reborn are quite common in the cultivating world. Hence, it’s possible that Shu Yu could have retained her divine intent and reincarnated.”

“Well, I know that Shu Honglan likes Big Brother Cheng, and Big Brother Cheng must also have feelings toward Shu Honglan. Otherwise, he would not let her pursue him for several decades, but I have to say, isn’t this relationship progressing far too slowly?” An Lin spoke as he chomped on spirit fruits.

It was quite clear that Xuanyuan Cheng and Shu Honglan had mutual feelings for one another.

Hence, it was a little strange that they still hadn’t become dao partners even after several decades.

Even if you tried to set a wet log alight, it would have dried out and caught on fire after several decades!

“There’s actually a reason behind this…”

Xu Xiaolan hesitated momentarily before speaking in a quiet voice.

“Hmm? What is it?” An Lin interest had been piqued.

“I heard that Xuanyuan Cheng’s parents split up due to relationship problems, and the split had greatly traumatized him, which is why he won’t easily begin a relationship,” Xu Xiaolan replied quietly.

An Lin’s eyes lit up slightly, and he nodded.

Most cultivators were actually quite faithful unless they were part of a really scummy minority. They wouldn’t just enter relationships easily like mortals on Earth before going through breakups and even divorces without thinking too much.

In the cultivating world, you were either friends or dao partners who would stay together forever. If a couple was to suddenly split up due to relationship problems, not only would they be looked down on by others, it could even affect their dao hearts. In extreme cases like Patriarch Zhu Yin’s case study, one could even suffer a drop in cultivation base.

A dao partner was a partner for life, and monogamy was held in high regard in society.

This was also why Xu Xiaolan had proposed a hundred-year agreement to verify their feelings toward one another.

“Looks like we’ll have to do something decisive to break that barrier in Big Brother Cheng’s heart.” An Lin looked at the two people in the distance, and it would not be an exaggeration to say that they were a match made in heaven.

Shu Honglan did try to seduce Big Brother Cheng, but none of it could be considered to be actual seduction. All she did was to dance for him, give him some presents, and maybe give him a few passionate looks from time to time.

It was clear to see that she wouldn’t be able to bring herself to mount Big Brother Cheng by force.

“How about… we use some aphrodisiacs?” An Lin muttered.

Bam!

An Lin instantly copped a smack to the head from Xu Xiaolan.

“What are you thinking? Can’t you suggest some constructive plans?” Xu Xiaolan glowered.

An Lin was a little confused. How was this not constructive? This was mutual love, and all that would have to happen was for that final layer of paper window to be punctured. However, they discovered that this paper window was constructed from diamond and couldn’t be punctured even after several decades! What could they do aside from taking some drastic measures?

“How about… we get Shu Honglan to confess to Big Brother Cheng?” An Lin suggested with an excited expression.

“We tried that as well,” a crisp voice sounded from behind him.

An Lin turned to find a beautiful woman in purple standing beside him in a respectful manner with a wide smile on her face. “Tong Ling pays her respects to Sect Leader An Lin.”

“Oh, so you’re Tong Ling. No need for formalities. Tell me the specifics.” An Lin was intrigued.

“Forty-two years ago, Big Sister Lan Lan confessed to Pavilion Lord Xuanyuan Cheng, only for him to reject her even though he was quite touched. After that, Lan Lan confessed five more times in the next few decades, but she was euphemistically rejected each and every time without exception…” Tong Ling heaved an exasperated sigh.

An Lin was astonished. “Holy f*ck, Shu Honglan can persevere even after that? It’s not good for Big Brother Cheng to leave her hanging for so long…”

An awkward expression appeared on Tong Ling’s face. “Actually… it’s Big Sister Lan Lan who has been forcing herself on him this entire time. Well, that’s not entirely true. Pavilion Lord Xuanyuan Cheng seems to enjoy this process…”

“What kind of stupid situation is this…” An Lin’s lips twitched.

“In reality, Pavilion Lord Xuanyuan Cheng holds Big Sister Lan Lan in high regard in his heart. Thirteen years ago, there was a battle against the Heavenly Human Tribe, and Pavilion Lord Xuanyuan Cheng risked his life to hold off a dozen or so Heavenly Human Tribe generals in order to buy time for Big Sister Lan Lan to escape,” Tong Ling continued.

An Lin understood now.

Shu Honglan held a very high position in Big Brother Cheng’s heart, but he was very averse to and even horrified by the concept of becoming dao partners with someone.

“Gamophobia[1]…” An Lin muttered to himself.

“Xiao Ze and Fanny are so happily married, but Xuanyuan Cheng still isn’t willing to come out of his shell.” Xu Xiaolan was at a loss.

An Lin then stated a few more potential courses of action. For example, getting them to go on a holiday together or sending them into a set of perilous ruins to speed up the progression of their relationship, all of which were rejected by Xu Xiaolan and Tong Ling.

After listening for a while, Tong Ling lost hope and began to participate in the activities again.

An Lin and Xu Xiaolan were still discussing what to do about Xuanyuan Cheng.

Da Bai lay beside them and yawned at the sight of the bickering couple.

“Two people who haven’t become dao partners after more than a hundred years are concerned about two people who haven’t become dao partners after only several decades. How amusing, woof!” Da Bai grumbled lazily.

Boom!

His words were like a bolt of lightning, which instantly rooted An Lin and Xu Xiaolan to the spot.

At the same time, ten thousand points of damage were inflicted.

A brief period of silence ensued.

“You’re right… Why am I so worried about Big Brother Cheng?” An Lin muttered.

Xu Xiaolan placed her hand on An Lin’s, and she spoke with an earnest expression, “An Lin, I will marry you whenever you want.”

An Lin pinched her delicate nose with a smile. “I told you I would only marry you after the conclusion of this war, when no one can disrupt us. When that time comes, I’m going to hold the grandest and most lavish wedding in the entire world for you!”

“Alright!” Xu Xiaolan nodded with passion glowing in her eyes.

“Burp…” Da Bai let loose a loud burp.

He was chomping on his golden rice balls again. They could dispel all of the negative emotions in his heart, and he immediately felt much better as he narrowed his eyes with bliss.

[1] Gamophobia: a fear of commitment, in particular, marriage.