His eyes were soaked with water, and they began to boil the moment they looked at each other, bubbling up, and his love could no longer be concealed.

Song Shengshi was stunned by the surging emotions. Looking at those eyes, he couldn't say anything for a while.

why?

Song Shengshi couldn't figure it out. He didn't think he had done anything out of line recently. It was common for members to express their love to each other since they were trainees.

No, there is still a difference. The members’ interactions only start from the moment they step into the practice room and introduce themselves.

As for him, more than 20 years ago, when he told Xu Duoduo that he wanted to know more about SEVENTEEN, and when he clicked on the first video link sent by Xu Duoduo, the gears of fate began to turn.

Song Shengshi is not only their companion, but also their fan. He originally thought that living together would break the fan filter, but he never thought that he had never had any so-called filter for SEVENTEEN.

What attracted him the most was the pure affection between the members.

And these are all true.

"Shengshi."

His thoughts were interrupted, and Song Shengshi looked up blankly at Li Zhixun who was lying on him.

His well-trained arms were supported on his sides, pressing down the sofa, causing it to sink a bit, and almost shrouding Song Shengshi's upper body in shadow.

"You're distracted." Li Zhixun's tone was calm, and he didn't seem surprised by Song Shengshi's reaction.

After he made up his mind to express his love, Song Shengshi's eyes were confused for a moment, and then he immediately fell into his own thoughts.

But it's good that I didn't dodge.

Li Zhixun slowly released the force on his arms, and leaned down with his whole body. He leaned his ear against Song Shengshi's slightly rising and falling chest and listened to Song Shengshi's chaotic heartbeat.

His eyes darkened and he reached down and clasped Song Shengshi's fingers.

"I love you," he bent down, his forehead against Song Shengshi's chest, his voice trembling, "I love you, but..."

“I don’t know what to do….”

Lee Ji-hoon's affection for Song Sheng-se was not that strong. In the beginning, Lee Ji-hoon didn't even think that he liked Song Sheng-se as much as the other members.

He still remembered the first time he met Song Shengshi, when he looked at him from behind Choi Seungcheol, and the surprise that burst out when the boy's hazel eyes touched him.

It was as if he had been waiting for a long time.

It was clearly the first time they met, and before that, they were in different countries and had no interactions.

Li Zhixun thought for a long time but couldn't figure out why Song Shengshi looked at him like that. In fact, he knew that he should put more attention on practice, but he couldn't let go.

Because at that time, besides his parents, he was the only person who gave him that expectant and surprised look.

Li Zhixun knows that his personality is not very likable, and many people around him will eventually stay away from him because he is too cold or a little difficult to approach.

Li Zhixun cared a lot about that look, and naturally began to care about Song Shengshi as a person. Sometimes when he saw him in an embarrassing situation, he would take the initiative to help him out, even if his methods might be more awkward and his words might not be as pleasing as others.

But Song Shengshi still easily found the little cat hidden in the hard clam shell. He opened a crack and put his arm in to pet the cat, not worrying about being pinched at all.

The little cat Xun was holding the clam shell, feeling both enjoyment and fear. He wanted to quickly pull the clam shell down to block it, but was worried about hurting Song Shengshi.

At that time, Li Zhixun was not very familiar with the skill of making new friends quickly, but it was a skill that he had to master. The trainees in the practice room were like wheat straw in the field, which would grow again after one crop was broken.

Although the speed of overlapping and replacement is fast, it is just like the growth cycle of wheat straw, which takes at least ten days to half a month.

This is an awkward time because it necessarily includes two assessments of group cooperation with five to six people, and more than four double assessments, all of which are randomly assigned.

The awkwardness of this period of time lies in that if you don't get along well with others, you can just endure it and it will pass. This period of time is very long.

This was not a particularly comfortable process. Although it seems now that the relationship between me and the members was not perfect, because I had the mindset of living together for a long time from the beginning, I didn't have too many complaints.

Basically, all the dissatisfaction has been expressed, of course, there may be some that have not been expressed but are still brewing.

Song Shengshi has never shown this kind of stubbornness. After he adapted to the training life in Korea, he naturally helped the new trainees to integrate, and when the trainees he had a good relationship with left, he was able to say goodbye calmly.

There is always a kind of temperament about him, as if all problems can be easily solved.

At that time, most of the trainees were fascinated by Song Shengshi's temperament, but they didn't know that this was the so-called charm of a mature older man.

Although he was gradually infected with youthful spirit during their subsequent interactions, Lee Ji-hoon will always remember that when Miki's mother took Miki to terminate his contract with Paradox, Song Shengshi calmly proposed a more appropriate solution to the then overwhelmed Miki's mother.

With an upright posture and eyes that were sharp and firm yet gentle enough, he produced layer upon layer of supporting materials and a rough ten-year development plan that combined Sanmu's personality traits, which convinced Sanmu's mother to accept the more suitable training plan.

Before leaving, Sanmu's mother said to Song Shengshi: "You can see it more clearly than me as a mother."

Although Li Zhixun had long discovered that Song Shengshi's surprised and expectant eyes were not only shining for him.

But things had already changed. Rather than delving into the reason for that flash of gaze, he was more concerned about Song Shengshi's attention and appreciation. How much of it should be divided, and could he get a piece of it?

love, love, love

When Li Zhixun saw the members around him showing their love to Song Shengshi in exchange for more attention, he began to panic.

He realized earlier than any other member that Song Shengshi did not understand love and could not feel love.

Lee Ji-hoon had seen the confusion in the members' eyes during their first kiss many times. Compared to the love expressed by kissing, the tears shed by the members and the physical pleasure were more likely to attract Song Shengshi's attention.

Li Zhixun wanted to know how Song Shengshi felt, and wanted to know the psychological activities that went through him when he took a step back and separated himself from the situation when everyone was crying with joy.

These are too private, and except for the most professional psychologist, Li Zhixun does not have the confidence to analyze these deep emotions.

He even thought about asking a wizard to calculate it, but he was afraid that the calculation might reveal something strange.

Guessing people's emotions is itself a part of creation, but Song Shengshi made him even cautious in guessing and speculating.

When Song Shengshi's separation anxiety broke out in China, Li Zhixun completely couldn't understand Song Shengshi. Since then, although Song Shengshi recovered quickly, Li Zhixun developed the habit of seeing a psychologist regularly.

There are no secrets between members of a large group. It took Lee Ji-hoon a long time to deal with the members who were worried about him, and they "reluctantly" accepted the decision that the members would take turns to come to the recording studio to accompany him when he couldn't sleep.

Song Shengshi seemed to misunderstand that he was still troubled by the terrifying scene in Los Angeles, and took the initiative to approach him and accompany him.

Li Zhixun did not deny it.

In fact, he was quite happy. The psychologist told him other ways to deal with and understand emotions, which gave him inspiration. He stayed in the studio all night several times just to record these precious ideas.

But he was still confused, just like returning to the practice room in the middle of the night and pulling up the canopy, not sure whether he could see the moon or the starry sky outside.

Maybe it was a cloudy day and the night was dark.

This strange uncertainty made Li Zhixun hide his love. He despised his own cowardice. He was afraid to spread his love, but the land was barren and nothing could grow.

If the members have planted things on this dry land, what will happen if one day they realize that the land cannot bear fruit?

Li Zhixun looked into Song Shengshi's eyes and leaned over to kiss the tip of his nose again.

When I looked up, I saw Song Shengshi opened his eyes again, and confusion flashed across his eyes.

There was not much space on the sofa, and the two people were lying on top of each other. Song Shengshi was squeezed under Li Zhixun, and his shoulders were hunched.

Although he was in such a controlled posture, Song Shengshi's eyes showed a look of confusion after the sleepiness at the beginning had dissipated, and more of it was the excitement of being eager to try.

The rational dilemma only lasted about two seconds, which made Li Zhixun feel like laughing.

Ah, it seems that during the time I was hesitating, Song Shengshi was well nurtured.

He leaned over, bit Song Shengshi's Adam's apple, and licked it gently with the tip of his tongue, like a hunter biting the lifeblood of his prey, feeling the vividness and beauty of the life he touched.

He couldn't bear it anymore, and he didn't want to be like before, indecisive and longing for a clear answer.

He is a creator, which means that every emotion is precious creative material for him.

But now, the sour and tangled unrequited love material is enough, he wants to know the hot and sweet love.

If Song Shengshi doesn't understand, then he will keep irrigating and fertilizing, and turning the soil over and over again to make the land fertile again.

One day, sweet fruits will grow on it.

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