I am a freeloader in the anime world

Su Yang chatted with Yukinoshita Yukino for almost the entire lunch break, and he didn't seem to be in any unpleasant mood.

"Could it be that Hiratsuka-sensei is wrong?"

Su Yang thought silently.

"what happened to you?"

Yukinoshita Yukino looked at the strange look in Su Yang's eyes and asked uncomfortably.

"Hiratsuka-sensei said that you were not in a good mood, but I have been chatting with you in the Service Club for the whole afternoon, and I didn't see anything wrong with your mood."

In line with the energy-saving principle of saving energy if possible without thinking, Su Yang decisively asked his doubts.

"..."

Hearing Su Yang's question, Yukinoshita Yukino fell silent.

After a moment, Yukinoshita Yukino spoke.

"Do you know Hikigaya Hachiman from Class F, first grade?"

"I know. He was in a car accident at the beginning of the school year and stayed in the hospital for more than a month. He just came to school today." Su Yang told his understanding of Hikigaya Hachiman. Of course, it was only his understanding of the current situation. Su Yang did not tell the specific situation, including his future.

"I caused his car accident." Yukinoshita Yukino looked into Su Yang's eyes, her expression somewhat nervous and uneasy, and she felt guilty. "Because of this car accident, he missed the opportunity to integrate into the class group when he entered school, and now he is isolated by various groups in the class."

"..."

What I mean is, is there a possibility that even if there hadn't been this car accident, with Hikigaya Hachiman's personality, he wouldn't have been able to integrate into the group in the class?

Su Yang recalled what the illegal time traveler he arrested had said, and complained silently in his heart.

However, Su Yang did not say out loud what he was complaining about, mainly because he didn't know how to say it.

Should I tell Yukinoshita Yukino not to worry, because this world is actually a light novel world and the author set it up. Even if there was no car accident at the beginning of school, Hikigaya Hachiman would not be able to integrate into the group.

From the mouths of those illegal travelers, Su Yang didn't dare to say that he understood Hikigaya Hachiman 100%, but he could say that in this world, apart from those illegal travelers and Hikigaya Hachiman, Su Yang was the person who knew Hikigaya Hachiman best.

Ego, scars, self-protection, and distortion.

These four words represent Su Yang's understanding of Hikigaya Hachiman.

Of course, these four words can also be said to be one word, which is loneliness.

As a person who has never been sociable, popular, and often teased since childhood, and at the same time, he is the eldest son in the family, and part of his parents' love is divided by his younger sister, although the relationship between the siblings is very good, Hikigaya Hachiman has always been passively in a lonely growth environment.

Not only that, Hikigaya Hachiman is also a sensitive person, and this sensitivity has also brought him psychological scars.

It wouldn't matter if Hikigaya Hachiman's experience was experienced by a cheerful and optimistic person, or if it was experienced by Su Yang.

However, it is precisely Hikigaya Hachiman's sensitive personality that makes him shy away from interpersonal communication. At the same time, because of this, he is very hesitant about interpersonal communication.

As a result, the more hesitant he is, the more his social skills decline and the harder it is to make friends. This in turn causes confusion among others, making people wonder if there is something wrong with Hikigaya Hachiman. Gradually, Hikigaya Hachiman becomes passively alienated from the group, thus falling into a vicious cycle from which he cannot extricate himself.

Loneliness is the underlying color of Hikigaya Hachiman's growth.

However, humans are social creatures with instinctive emotional needs, which cannot be avoided.

Hikigaya Hachiman also longs to be close to others.

However, this desire was constantly alienated in Hikigaya Hachiman's lonely situation until he entered puberty and achieved self-awareness.

The expansion of people's self-awareness is an inevitable stage during adolescence, the only difference is the degree of it. People leave their ignorant childhood and begin to care about the existence of "self", and this "self" is constructed through the evaluation of others.

Moreover, people at this time have not yet established a mature personality and are filled with the inexplicable desire for performance in adolescence. At the same time, they desire to be recognized, imagine the eyes of others, and look forward to the expectations of others.

These are the restless psychology unique to adolescence, that is, self-consciousness.

Hikigaya Hachiman's long-term lonely and repressed life has made him extremely self-conscious. When he transfers his desire for self-consciousness onto others, this is the source of his misunderstanding of other people's behavior.

Adolescence is often accompanied by beautiful ambiguity between the opposite sex, and Hikigaya Hachiman also had this ambiguity during his junior high school years.

However, Hikigaya Hachiman's emotions have always been in a humble state, and in the dark history he has experienced, he has never taken the initiative.

If a girl treats everyone gently, after being magnified by Hikigaya Hachiman's self-awareness, she will mistakenly think that "she may like me" and thus invest her emotions and expectations on this "her".

And in this process, it doesn't matter what kind of person 'she' is.

The essence of this so-called "like" is actually Hikigaya Hachiman's desire to be noticed and recognized.

As a result, Hikigaya Hachiman's kindness was trampled upon, even though the fault was not entirely on the other party.

Because every time he mustered up the courage to approach her, he ended in failure. When his self-esteem was trampled on time and time again, the sensitive Hikigaya Hachiman suffered a lot of hurt.

Because of loneliness, I tried to get close to others, but in the end, I got hurt by getting close and fell into deeper loneliness.

"So, you think that the root of Hikigaya Hachiman's current problems lies with you."

After a long silence, Su Yang asked Yukinoshita Yukino.

Yukinoshita Yukino did not say anything in response to Su Yang's question and fell into silence. However, Su Yang saw deep guilt and self-blame in her eyes.

Obviously, even if Yukinoshita Yukino didn't say anything, Su Yang knew that she had indeed blamed himself for all the problems.

This time, it was Su Yang's turn to be silent. He didn't know how to comfort Yukinoshita Yukino, but he knew that if this problem was not solved, Yukinoshita Yukino would probably have a thorn in her heart and would be trapped in self-blame all the time.

However, Su Yang had no idea how to remove this thorn at the moment.

After all, to solve this problem, I'm afraid we have to solve Hikigaya Hachiman's current problem first.

However, Hikigaya Hachiman’s problem is not so easy to solve.

According to what those illegal travelers said, this is probably not just a matter of time, but Yukinoshita Yukino might also have to be sacrificed.

Su Yang was reluctant about this.

After all, the bento made by Yukinoshita Yukino is still very delicious. If Su Yang really pushes Yukinoshita Yukino to Hikigaya Hachiman, wouldn't he have no delicious bento to eat in the future?

That won't work!

Su Yang made a silent decision in his heart.

However, whether it was really because of the delicious bento made by Yukinoshita Yukino, or because of some other reason that made Su Yang reluctant to part with Yukinoshita Yukino, only he himself knew.