The daily struggles of divorced women in ancient times

"After my brother was born, my life became even harder. I worked non-stop from morning till night, washing diapers until my hands turned white, but I couldn't even get enough to eat. I used to have a place to sleep, but after my brother was born, I could only sleep in the woodshed. Once, my stepmother went out to buy something, and my brother almost rolled off the bed. I saw him and rushed over. My brother was fine in the end, but my hand was burned by the brazier on the floor."

"I thought that since I saved my brother, I would be able to get a good word and have a full meal. But who knew that my stepmother came back and said that I wanted to kill my brother. My father beat me and almost killed me. I couldn't get up from the beating and there was no one to cook, so they remembered me. Maybe they thought I was still useful, so they threw me some food. After a few days, I came back to life."

As Zhang Xiaolian was talking, the bad memories of the past seemed to come back to her. She said self-deprecatingly, "Sister Xia, I'm not lying to you. I hated it. Later, my brother got sick. The family was really broke. My father couldn't borrow a penny from outside, so they wanted to sell me. I thought that even if they sold me, it would still be a way to survive. At worst, I could become a maid, at least I wouldn't starve. But in the end, they wanted to sell me to a brothel! It was a brothel..."

Zhang Xiaolian's eyes were a little strange at this time, and the pain just now seemed to have disappeared. She looked at Xia Mianwan and asked with a smile: "Sister Xia, guess what I did?"

Xia Mianwan looked at Zhang Xiaolian steadily and said, "Well... probably he set a fire and burned these two damn people."

Zhang Xiaolian didn't expect Xia Mianwan to say that. She looked at Xia Mianwan in surprise, and her tone rose a bit, "You know?"

"Guess."

"Yes, I set the fire. In order to set the fire, I told my father that I was willing to be sold and just wanted to have this last meal with my parents. My father looked at me with such a gentle look, softer than ever before. There was still some rice wine at home, and my father and stepmother drank it all in one go. Because I told them not to worry about not having anything to drink in the future, that after I entered the brothel... I would work hard and become the top star in the brothel, so that they could have a good life every day! Not to mention this wine that is not good enough to be served, I would get them the wine from the Western Regions."

"Do you think they are naive? They believe this..."

"Then, after they fell asleep, I set a fire in their room. The fire was really strong, burning and burning..." Zhang Xiaolian began to cry as she spoke. It was so bitter. Life was really so bitter.

"Sister Xia, do you think I'm a bad person? My parents deserve to die, but my brother is innocent. But I can't do anything. Without my parents, he will die too." Zhang Xiaolian looked at Xia Mianwan and said softly.

Xia Mianwan sighed, handed a handkerchief to Zhang Xiaolian, and said at a loss for words, "This world is too bitter."

Zhang Xia Lian looked at Xia Mianwan in astonishment, "Sister Xia, aren't you going to call me cruel? After all, I set fire to my family."

"Don't tell others to do good without suffering others' suffering."

Zhang Xiaolian was happy to hear this, and wiped her tears and said, "This is my past, but I have never regretted it. After I came to Xiaowu, everyone was actually very nice, but I didn't know how to get along with people, and I was afraid of being abandoned by Xiaowu. I didn't have any other skills, and I really couldn't survive. So, I always used some little tricks and little means, because they really worked. Now I know I can survive, I'm not afraid anymore, and I won't be like this in the future."

"Why are you telling me this?" Xia Mianwan was still confused.

"Maybe it's because I'm not afraid anymore. Before, when I was in the mountains, I was always afraid of being abandoned, but now I'm not afraid anymore."

Xia Mianwan was silent for a while and then said, "Then why do you stay in the mountains?"

"I stayed in the mountains because I felt more comfortable there. I actually hate people and the world. The way you looked at me that night made me feel ashamed. However, I also want to try to no longer have to look at people's faces, and see what it means to live an upright life. I don't plan to get married again in the future. I will live a good life with my brothers and sisters in the mountains. Sister Xia, I really wanted to drink a bowl of wine with you that day. Although I have little contact with you, I often hear people mention you. I envy you very much, but you ordered me that night and didn't want to drink with me. So, after Xiaowu said those things yesterday, I thought about it carefully and figured it out a little bit."

Xia Mianwan propped up her chin and tilted her head to glance at Zhang Xiaolian. Zhang Xiaolian was actually very pretty, and she was very infectious when she said those words, but... they were on different paths.

Pity……

Xia Mianwan sighed slightly, human hearts...are hard to predict.

"Then I wish you a good life in these mountains." Xia Mianwan said seriously.

"but……"

"But what?" Zhang Xiaolian asked puzzledly.

However, tears and pretending to be pitiful should not be used as weapons against one's own people, because only sincere people will be held hostage. However, Xia Mianwan did not say this.

"nothing."

"Sister Xia, I will take good care of the yard in the mountains. It can be regarded as a layer of protection for you." Zhang Xiaolian bit her lip and said.

Xia Mianwan's attitude had never been warm. Even when she heard that she had set fire to someone, she was not very surprised. Zhang Xiaolian didn't know what else to say. For a moment, she actually felt a little nervous, a nervousness she hadn't felt since she set the fire. So she twisted her hands unconsciously.

After a long silence, Xia Mianwan raised her eyebrows and looked at Zhang Xiaolian: "Xiaolian, you don't have to be so roundabout when telling me this."

Zhang Xiaolian lowered her head with a hint of sadness, and then said goodbye to Xia Mianwan.

Xia Mianwan looked at Zhang Xiaolian's back as she left and fell into deep thought. She was such a powerful person, but she didn't know if she would really need him. Fighting for yourself is not a bad thing, but... let's just wait and see.