When Ultraman appears in reality, however:

Chapter 311 Diary

The painting feels somewhat eerie, but when I look closely, some frightening details begin to emerge.

For example, the boy in the picture is also wearing red clothes, and the messy lines seem to outline the image of a young man who was tortured to death.

What was even more horrifying was that there was a huge gash in his abdomen, with his internal organs hanging from the wound. His blood and gastric juice mixed together, forming a picture that would cause ordinary people to feel extremely painful.

It’s a pity that I can’t feel pain.

Although this portrait was extremely similar to my current situation, I still needed more clues to understand my situation.

For example, who am I?

After some thought, I made a bold guess: perhaps death has come to this body.

However, the scene before him clearly did not conform to the traditional sense of the underworld.

If this is really the underworld, then the Ox-Head and Horse-Faced Devil, the Black and White Impermanence, and the King of Hell should all appear.

Could it be that for some reason, my household registration was changed to a foreigner, making it impossible for me to enter the jurisdiction of the underworld where I originally belonged, and thus participate in the hell rituals of other countries? This idea is too incredible.

I shook my head and murmured, "Strange..."

Then I opened the cabinet on the other side, trying to search for more useful objects.

There were fewer medical supplies than I'd hoped, but this is an office, not an operating room, so I can't complain.

A large number of books were stacked together, and I randomly pulled out a black diary with the slogan written on it.

“To take a tragic intoxication from the absolute meaninglessness of life.”

I simply sat on the office chair in front of the display desk. Although the black seat cushion was stained a little dark red, there was really nothing I could do.

After all, just sit comfortably.

Opening the first page, there are only two prominent words on it, which are obviously written by the previous owner of the diary.

Name: Yue Ji.

Birthday: March 7th.

I had some impression of this name, but I couldn't remember it, so I had no choice but to continue flipping.

2020 12 Month 15 Day.

Try your best, Yue Ji, don't forget the video you are going to make, everything you hate is here, you can't stop.

Don't be incompetent. You have always been alone. Even if you are lonely all your life, you have to go on with hatred. You have to become strong, no matter how many tears you shed.

"What the hell..."

I shook my head, seeming to sneer at this diary. Although I agreed with the concept, it was quite funny when it was written out.

……

"There are some wrinkles in Yue Ji's diary. Is it because it fell into the water?" Yi Xilin pointed to the edge of the black diary, but Ma Xiayi refuted.

"If you really fall into the water, it won't be like this. It's very likely that..."

Ma Xiayi did not continue, firstly because she realized something, and secondly because the content of this page was a bit too much.

2021 8 Month 28 Day.

I want to write a good article. This may be the last thing I want to say. If something unexpected happens, the police or others can find evidence and clues from here.

I suddenly felt that no conversation could solve the problem, and the black and white writing half a month ago had no effect...

I once had a dream to gain freedom with my own abilities. The past two years of my attempts at self-media can be said to be the happiest time of my life. My grades have improved, and I can do what I want to do.

But...things have changed. Even my relatives and family members made me understand what a dead end is.

I can only bury everything I have left here.

I need to survive. Without anyone's support, I can finish my studies and try my best to be a good son. But why? Everything has become like junior high school again.

Why do you want to destroy everything I have? Because you found a new wife?

They lied to me over and over again, concealed and diverted conflicts over and over again, destroyed my identity countless times and kicked me out of my home.

Yes, you got married and had a new family, and so did my mother in the past, so you would choose to break my legs, whip my body, and then leave me outside in sub-degree weather overnight.

No one understood. He was like a liar who deceived everyone. Even if I tore my face and bit my finger bones, they still thought I had a mental illness.

It is true that epilepsy and depression occurred, but I never used the illness as an excuse. I always fought for my rights and relied on my own will to resist.

I have been cheerful and talkative since I was young. Even though I have these mental problems, I will still adjust my heart and use my willpower to resist.

I wouldn't be such a fragile person.

But you made me lose everything again.

2022 2 Month 1 Day.

I feel so tired, so lonely, so oppressed...

I was rescued. When the sanitation worker dug me out of the snow, my skin had already been frozen and cracked. My life was about to be abandoned, but my cousin saved it and then sent it to the hospital.

Fortunately, my brother still cares about me.

Unfortunately, only my brother showed up.

Countless pages of painful emotions almost silenced the two girls for a while.

until……

2022 4 Month 29 Day.

Life started to get better. My dad went to live with my stepmother, and I was the only one left in this place. Even if he didn't give me a penny, I could support myself.

Learn editing and fitness.

Don't stand still.

A long time has passed, it's time to set off Yue Ji, this is your own struggle.

2022 8 Month 18 Day.

When I saw the screenshots of Ma Xiayi’s birthday, I did feel a little emotional. I don’t know why, but when I think about the past, I feel that everything seems to be indifferent.

Compared with the hardships of junior high school and high school, what does this matter?

Others are always others. Even your own family doesn't want you. Why are you still trying to seek their care? Seeking so-called love?

It's somewhat ridiculous. I still need to continue on the road of survival and I am still far from being an ordinary person or even having a better life.

It will be difficult for me to reach it in my lifetime, so I will have to spend the rest of my life repairing the trauma of my childhood.

……

I was somewhat touched, perhaps because of the resonance in my heart. Even though the words above made no sense, I could still understand the emotions in them.

December 2022, 10.

I lost everything and was left alone. My dad was drunk and came back to smash my house to pieces. I suffered a seizure due to the emotional excitement and then fell to the ground, unable to move. I could only breathe heavily to stay alive.

The numbness of the body must be painful, but when my father's soles were still on my body, I felt the most excruciating pain.

It's always been like this.

It never changes.

I hate myself.

I hate being born like this...

Tell me again and again what hope is, and then shatter it all in an instant.

……

There is too much content in the diary...

But most of them record Yue Ji's loss, pain, confusion, and grief.

The further the content is recorded, the greater the degree of pain.

Just like a boxer who constantly builds up his resistance and will to defend himself from blows, but the enemies attacking him grow at a faster rate.

Always when Yue Ji just caught his breath, he would give him a heavy blow that shattered everything.