Villain, be good! I'm here to give birth to a baby [Quick Wear]

(The following is the system reading the villain's life's thoughts...)

……

In the third year of Yongyuan, the first snow fell.

It was the day Yang Li and I were born.

It is also my mother’s death anniversary.

She died of dystocia, and my biological father died long ago while saving people while controlling a flood. Yang Li and I were considered posthumous children. Perhaps because of this, my mother was determined to give birth to Yang Li and me at the risk of her life.

Although Yang Li and I are twins, our destinies were determined from birth.

Because I have gray eyes.

People with gray eyes are not all unlucky, but there is a 50% chance that they are destined to be unlucky, and I am that unlucky half.

The doctor suggested that my grandparents should make the decision while I was still ignorant and didn't know anything, and find some random reason to make me die unexpectedly.

I don’t know what my grandparents were thinking. In the end, I survived and they decided to raise me as a normal person. If I really developed a disease later, they would have someone take care of me until I died.

Even if I was destined to die young, they wanted me to live like a normal person instead of strangling me in my cradle.

I am very grateful that they decided to raise me like this even though they knew I was unfortunate. If I hadn't overheard their conversation when I was a child, I wouldn't even know that I was unfortunate.

Who knows, I might have spent my childhood happily like Yang Li, and it was this conversation that made me realize that the Yang family is not as peaceful as it seems.

The current emperor is already dissatisfied with the Yang family because they are so popular among the people. This is a hidden "threat" to an emperor, and he cannot tolerate a minister's reputation surpassing his own.

Although the Yang family is no longer as strong as before after the deaths of my parents, His Majesty is still dissatisfied with the Yang family's unshakable position in the court and has been suppressing forces related to the Yang family.

The Yang family’s greatest support is my grandfather, but he is old and gradually unable to do anything.

Especially under the deliberate suppression of the emperor, it became increasingly difficult for him to support the thriving tree of the Yang family.

Until the emperor decided to make the eighth prince the crown prince, my grandfather opposed this and died in the court...

Because the Eighth Prince had raped a woman and had some dirty dealings with court officials in order to obtain disaster relief funds, which was not what a wise ruler should do, so my grandfather stood up and hoped that the emperor would appoint a new ruler.

But the emperor seemed to be deliberately going against his grandfather. Although he did not mention the matter of making the eighth prince the crown prince for the time being, he still let the eighth prince succeed to the throne after his death.

The eighth prince became the new emperor and changed the reign title to Yongchu.

And Yongchu means the beginning of the Yang family's decline.

On the surface, the new emperor acted as if he didn't care about his grandfather's previous death-defying advice not to let him become the crown prince. He claimed that he understood that his grandfather was doing it for his own good, but he was still feeling aggrieved about it in his heart.

As soon as my grandfather died, the old tree that protected the Yang family fell.

It was easier for the new emperor to take action against the Yang family, but he was very good at disguise. When he was a prince, he loved to say one thing in public and another in private, and it was even more so now.

He will not directly become the "bad guy" himself, but he will force the Yang family to become the "bad guy" in disguise.

So the Yang family sent people into the palace to serve the new emperor. My grandmother was very conflicted at the time, but the new emperor had hinted very clearly that the Yang family must choose between me and Yang Li to enter the palace for him to vent his anger.

It was clear that I was the right person.

Anyway, I am a short-lived person and will not live long, nor can I become a tree that protects the Yang family from wind and rain in the future.

But Yang Li is different, he is a normal person and his life should not be ruined because of this.

So my grandmother found me and hoped that I would represent the Yang family to enter the palace to serve the new emperor. That day, my grandmother apologized to me over and over again, and she looked much older after that day.

Because although this is the right choice, it is also the wrong choice.

Entering the palace to serve the king sounds like nothing.

In fact, it means pushing me into the abyss.

The new emperor will certainly not be very nice to me because he bears a grudge against my grandfather for his death-defying advice. However, he is very concerned about his reputation and will certainly not reveal his narrow-mindedness in public, but it is hard to say what he will do in private.

So my grandmother knew that I was going to suffer instead of enjoy myself, and she felt guilty about it. She said that if my grandfather were still alive, he would definitely scold her.

She was unable to protect me, so I had to enter the palace and suffer even more in my already short life.

In fact, I don't blame her. She should have chosen me. Yang Li is not suitable. He is so normal and he should stay normal.

In order to prevent the world from blaming my grandmother, I acted like a "bad kid" and was eventually sent to the palace by my grandmother for self-reflection.

But after I was castrated and entered the palace, I found that I was too naive. The new emperor was even more petty and calculative than I thought. He hated my grandfather so much for his death-defying advice that he was willing to give me such a heavy reward. So the ways he tortured me were more disgusting than the last.

In order to make myself feel better, I chose to please him and turned myself into a wicked person who was hated by everyone, so that he could humiliate me in front of everyone and indulge in his sadistic desires.

This kind of humiliation is actually much better than the torture in the dark. In this way, I gained favor, avoided a lot of trouble, and was even able to help the Yang family secretly.

But I am no longer worthy of the Yang family.

The new emperor wants fame and face, and the Yang family wants them too.

I can't let such a "White Crane Family" created by generations of ancestors be destroyed because of me, so I don't want to have any contact with the Yang family, lest those people think that my grandmother taught me bad things, or think of going to other places related to the Yang family...

My badness is just my personal badness, it is my nature, it has nothing to do with others, and even less with the Yang family.

The Yang family is innocent.

I am the dirty one.

I originally thought that I would remain so dirty until death, but then I met Li Li, a newly crowned top scholar, who was the first person willing to be friends with me.

No matter how I scolded him, he didn't care. He said he thought I was not a bad person and wanted to be my friend.

But I scolded him for being self-righteous and power-hungry, and told him not to say such extremely hypocritical things under the guise of being a friend.

I don't need friends.

Because I don’t want anyone else in the world to be sad for me after I die, so I don’t need anyone who cares about me.

I should be despised by everyone, notorious, and a complete bad person.

But Li Li was more stubborn than I thought. He always said that I said one thing in public and another behind my back, and that I didn't really mean to hurt anyone. Even when I ignored him, he would come to me alone and even gave me a white jade flute, saying it suited me very well.

I scolded him severely, but in order to maintain my image as a villain, I still took the advantage. However, I didn't want to accept it, but he refused to take it, so the flute has remained with me.

Until Li Li got into trouble, I had to "fake his death" to get him out of this. This man has read a lot of books, but he still doesn't understand the ways of the world. He dared to report the matter of embezzling disaster relief funds. He has no sense at all.

You have to know that those old ministers who dared to take action against this thing had done this kind of thing with the current emperor in the past. If the emperor really punishes them, would they not have some "evidence" of the emperor's past in their hands?

Therefore, the emperor turned a blind eye and pretended that he knew nothing. He would only give those old ministers a warning when they went too far, but he did not dare to really take action against them.

Only a young man like Li Li, who knows nothing, would dare to go against the tide and even come before the emperor to seek justice. He is simply courting death without even realizing it.

I had no choice but to kill him in this way, and secretly found a place to raise him. However, I was still a step too slow, and he was rendered mute by the poison, with almost no hope of recovery. He felt desperate, and at one point couldn't accept this fact and wanted to commit suicide.

Civil officials have always been good at debate, and being unable to speak is tantamount to cutting off their livelihood.

But I still asked someone to treat him, and even learned sign language to communicate with him, hoping to give him hope. However, the effect was not obvious, so I could only ask someone to watch over him and not let him die for the time being.

In order to cure his throat, I spent a lot of money to buy various expensive medicinal herbs and tried many prescriptions. As a result, I didn't have much money. Even when someone deliberately took a black crane cloak to humiliate me on my birthday, I couldn't bear to throw it away.

The thing is good, let him humiliate me. I don’t mind him humiliating me this time anyway, and I can get a good thing to wear for free.

Somehow this matter reached Li Li's ears. He went crazy and scolded me for being so lowly and insisted that I throw the thing away. I thought he was overreacting, so I scolded him and left.

Maybe I scolded him too much. After the quarrel that day, Li Li suddenly seemed to have figured it out. He no longer refused to take the medicine and became much more obedient. However, he became more and more silent, which was completely the opposite of before.

I don't care why he became like this, as long as he doesn't go crazy and commit suicide.

On my next birthday, I received a plum tree sent by my grandmother, along with a bundle.