Lingering to the Bone: The President's Way of Chasing His Wife

"Dad, I never thought of living in this way, let alone hurting you in this way. Doing such a thing is the biggest pain in my heart. I just want to put I give you the best of myself, but I can’t do it myself. I don’t know when I became what I am now. I pushed myself to the edge step by step, but in the end I found out that I did it myself. Everything is wrong. You are right, no one is sorry for me, and no one betrays me. The person who betrayed is not you, but me. I have given you the heaviest hurt time and time again. , I forgot that you gave me the warmest family, let me know what family affection is and what love is, I have come step by step to the present, I can no longer tell which one is the real me, I have lost I have lost my original intention, my original intention has changed, I have become numb and indifferent, maybe I should really learn, as a man, what should be done and what should not be done, but these Over the years, I have always had a clear conscience. The only one I am ashamed of is you. I hurt you. Do you know that these things are actually my most painful memories in the depths of my heart. I am afraid, I am afraid of meeting you, I am afraid of putting pressure on myself over these things again and again, but I have never cared about your feelings, I ignore your feelings, this is my life The biggest mistake is actually as a father, you should hate me in your heart, because I, a son, never gave you any care or any help. On the contrary, I gave you a lot of sadness and pain. Once again, I imposed all my own things on you, and again and again I threw away the things I didn't want again and again. In my heart, I didn't have any concept of the world, and I didn't think that I had something What can I do and what can't be done. Sometimes I just want to live in peace and stability, but why is it so difficult? Who did I offend? Do I deserve all the hurt and pain I have suffered? Do you deserve it? Suffering my abandonment of you, betrayal of you, is it all my fault? Is everything I do really so unforgivable? In your world, what did I say? And how in your hearts, I am nothing, I am not even a part of this family, I pull myself back from the abyss of pain again and again, just to hope that I can be happy and happy Life, but in the end I got nothing but despair again and again I really don't know how many days and nights like this I have to spend, I don't know how many days and nights like this I have spent , I am living tenaciously under mental torment, and I am desperately living upwards, because I am afraid that I will completely collapse if I relax, and I dare not let my tense nerves relax a little bit. Relaxed, I made myself like a wooden man, without any emotion for anything, only that faint face.When everyone thinks that I am a wooden person, when everyone thinks that I am not worthy of being a man at all, I have not given up on my ideals, because I know that deep down in my heart, I can do everything No, you don’t need to care about everything, but I must care about these things. I want to turn everything about me into the best and best thing in the world. I want all those who look down on me, just like my son, I bow down to me again and again, but I can't do it. My ability is not as good as my son, my energy is not as good as him, and everything I have is simply too late. I don't know how he did it, but I Knowing that he must have paid a lot of hardships behind the scenes, suffered a lot, and endured the torture of others again and again, I can't understand that feeling, how distressed it is.You are my father, I long for you to give me the warmest return again and again, I long for you to let me stay in this warm family again and again, even if the final result is that I am covered in bruises and can only leave alone, Even if I can only hide in a corner alone and feel sad, I will not give up easily again and again, but in the end I find that no matter what I do, I can't get the best result. My most painful memories are given to everyone. I always put my pain on others. I don’t think about whether others will feel pain because of what I did. I only know that I do it for revenge. Others, take revenge on the society, take revenge on everyone who has ever wronged me and wanted to hurt me." Zhang Yichen suddenly realized that such a father is so scary, it doesn't look like his own father at all, he used to be so Cowardly, but why did he suddenly say these words now? These words made him a son a little scared, and there was no way to understand. He didn't understand how much pressure he had put on his father, making him die in a flash After becoming like this, everything I do is really right, every time I keep saying how much my father did too much, how much I hurt everyone's heart, but Now think about the things I said and did to my father, wouldn’t it hurt their hearts? Maybe people should live with their hearts compared to their hearts, and put their pain on others again and again. What you get is always just what you least want to see. As a result, those results may seem normal in the eyes of others, but they are the most painful in your own eyes. "I think who of you Don't talk about anything else, let's all live the life that everyone wants to live, don't bear these pains alone, it is enough for everyone to live happily, why bother to make yourself so Tired, why let everyone be implicated because of their own little bit of unhappiness? You are all my relatives, please don’t hurt each other, so in the end it’s us who get the most hurt again and again. It’s still our family” reputation is something that I can’t reach. I wish I could live a happy life. Maybe in the eyes of others, love in reality is not as good as the cruel reality after all, but I still Believe that love is the most beautiful love, as long as you really love each other, no matter how difficult it is, you will not be afraid.