Breaking the cocoon gl+ Fanwai

During the Spring Festival, she will go home to celebrate the New Year.I felt a wave of panic and always felt like I had to do something.I started knitting, using the event to assuage my inner panic.At first I only planned to knit some warm clothes for my mother, but before I knew it, I even knit a snow-white scarf for her, and finally embroidered her name on it. Mother knitted two scarves.When I met her face-to-face, seeing her stupid appearance, I felt joy for the first time in my heart, and the joy was entangled again. I could only run away, not daring to watch her reaction afterwards.

That winter day, the days when she left, I fell into endless emptiness and longing.I miss her, I miss her so much, I miss her every day, and I never know that I have fallen into the mud.She would send me text messages, one after another, all insignificant things, but it brought me a lot of comfort, at least I knew what she was doing now.But I can't call her back, I pretend I can't see it, but I have to watch it with my mobile phone every day.During the night vigil on New Year's Eve, my mother forced me to call her, and I actually called her. When I heard her gentle and pleasant voice, I almost shed tears.The loud sound of firecrackers came from the other end of the phone, as our background sound, I don't know what I said, but the throbbing of that moment is still fresh in my memory.

But within a few days, I ushered in a new round of nightmares.

(Fives)

I don't remember exactly what happened on the fifth day of the Lunar New Year, I just know that I went crazy, grabbed those bastards, punched and kicked them.They are demons, they want to snatch my most important thing, my last precious property, how can I give them.

A beautiful woman appeared and claimed to be my therapist.Where is my psychiatrist, I don't know where she came from.But she has a familiar feeling, just like Gu Fan, which makes people feel a sense of trust for no reason.I subconsciously relied on her, and then in the police station, I saw Gu Fan who had rushed back from the journey.

She said she was my lawyer.I know she is a law student, which is not surprising.But what surprised me was that she actually called that psychiatrist senior sister. At that moment, I suddenly understood that she took care of me like this, not just because of her feelings for me, but actually entrusted by my mother. Also a psychiatrist, it's all a hoax, she's actually treating me.No wonder, no wonder she always likes to observe me, in fact, she is studying me.I felt cheated, she lied to me, she actually lied to me, my heart suddenly became cold, cold to the bone.That feeling even overshadowed the anger of being harassed by Zhang Yucheng's family again.

I decided to move out of her house, I couldn't accept the fact that she cheated on me.

That night, I packed my luggage and found that she was not there.I wanted to leave immediately, but when I passed the stairs, I heard the voice of conversation.She was talking to the psychiatrist's woman, and I overheard their conversation verbatim.I don't know how to face her, every word and every word when she cries is like flying flames hitting my heart, burning my heart aches and making it hard to breathe.So early in the morning, I followed her senior sister and fled her house.

For a long period of time, I lived in a daze, not knowing what I was doing.I worked very hard to cooperate with that psychiatrist for treatment. I knew that I was sick, and this disease must be cured, because I was about to file a lawsuit.But I want to cure this disease, but not just for this. In fact, I understand in my heart that it is more for her. This is her wish. She wants to see a healthy and beautiful me. How can I not be as good as her wish.But I can't get close to her, I tell myself, I don't deserve her, she is so good, but what am I? I no longer deny the fact that I am in love with her, I just still can't be with her, When I think of this, I feel inferior and feel shameless.

The lawsuit was over, everything was over, and we parted outside the court that day, which I thought was a farewell.Unexpectedly, she actually called and said that she would come again.I was in a nervous mood, or maybe I had foreseen something. In short, I persuaded my mother to go to the hospital to accompany my father for a night, and my mother agreed.I don't even know why I made such an arrangement. The inner conflict makes my brain messed up. I don't know what I want to do. My brain and body are out of sync.

She came, and as before, she lingered downstairs for a long time before coming up.I was so nervous that my palms were sweating.I treated her as if we were strangers.I could feel that she was sad, and seemed to have something to say to me.I couldn't be more tense, the anticipation and avoidance are taking my breath away.

She entered the mother's room, hugged the baby and talked for a while, she cried, crying very sadly, I was so sad, I covered my mouth and dared not make a sound.When she came out, I hurriedly hid at the end of the corridor. She didn't notice me, but went into the bathroom to wash my face.I stood at the end of the corridor waiting for her to come out, the struggle and entanglement in my heart was beyond words.

When she came out, she looked at me across the corridor for a long time before I adjusted my mood and called her to eat.The atmosphere at the table was indescribable, and I was almost suffocated.Finally she put down the bowl and chopsticks, I panicked and started trying to interrupt her with various words.But in the end, I failed, we started to quarrel, and then entangled, she restrained me with her powerful strength again, pushed me against the wall, and firmly wanted to confess to me.I could barely breathe, my heart was racing.She said: I love you, walk down with me! At that moment, my tears broke the embankment.For so long, I felt that I was just waiting for such a sentence, as long as she said it, I could be with her regardless.But I don't want her to speak out, I am such a conflicted entanglement.