Feng Lang Yu Qing

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"Does she like you?"

"do not know."

"Does she like girls?"

"This... I don't know." I was kicked out of the tube building by the boss before I could find out whether she was gay, straight or bisexual. tat

My mother was completely quiet over there, and after a long time, she replied to me with a little sadness: "It's sunny! Otherwise... let's forget it! I think you are a bit mysterious..." Then I heard my dad say that I also have today.I think I might have to get a genetic test done...

All right!Don't think about my father who gloated at other people's misfortune and made trouble.

Looking back on my first half of life, I think I have a lot of experience in flirting with girls.It is specifically reflected in that if I drink with a few of my buddies in a bar and flirt with girls, there are eight or nine out of ten girls who will be picked up by me on the spot, and the remaining one or two tenths can leave me with contact information .

But when she saw Xiaoyu, she didn't dare to use these methods in front of her eyes, and always felt that she was abrupt.Most of us in this circle are playing a spring breeze, who takes who seriously?We are all adults, and there is nothing wrong with your wish.But Xiaoyu is different.She's not like any other girl, not even anyone I've seen so far.No matter how seriously you take her, you can't be too serious.She should be held carefully, cared for, and loved.Not at all abrupt.

But because of this, I don't know what to do.

"She's so nice, super nice, very nice. I... really want to be with her for the rest of my life." I choked up a little after speaking.I don't know why I want to cry, but it just hurts.

The phone was also quiet for a while, "Then take it home and have a look!"

"But I don't know what to say to her."

My dad's gloating voice came over again, "Look, look, she's a coward. If she had half the charm of me, she wouldn't have to worry about finding a partner and being single until now, you know~" I wanted to cry at first, listen After finishing this sentence, I suddenly didn't want to cry.Not only did she not want to cry anymore, she also wanted to go home and beat him to death.

"Shut up." My mother said harshly to my father, and then continued to tell me: "Don't listen to your father's nonsense, he was much more cowardly than you back then."

I think my mother's personality is a bit like Xiaoyu's, both of them are the kind of gentle ladies, but back then, why did my father want culture and no culture, personality and personality, and looks and looks? Apart from being able to fight Is the good-for-nothing old man chasing back home?

To this day, I still feel that my mother's matching with my father is really blind.But from another point of view, the fact that my dad like this can catch up with my mom like this shows that my dad has a very good way of chasing his wife!Maybe I can learn from it.

It's a pity that my mother's next sentence killed my desire to humbly ask the old man for advice in the cradle, "I chased him back then."

At this moment, I felt that my outlook on life had collapsed.Many thoughts kept coming up and merged together, and finally there was only one sentence "Mom, why didn't you think about it back then?"

"Probably... it's because your dad is so cute and stupid! I think he would be too pitiful if I didn't want him."

Oh, I see, it turns out that she is doing good deeds every day, sacrificing herself for others, sacrificing her, saving thousands of female compatriots... Ah bah, what I'm thinking is all messed up.

But after thinking about it, if it was Xiaoyu chasing me, there would be no need for a rose diamond ring, as long as she said a word, no, no, no, no need to say a word, just give me a look, and I would marry her immediately, with a dowry That kind!

If I pretend to be pitiful, is she willing to pick me up like my mother picked up my dad?Wait, how could I just wait for her to chase me?What if she is shy and unwilling to chase me?What if a man confessed to her and took her away during this period?

Imagine for a moment, Xiaoyu is married, and the groom is not me... Damn, the heart, liver, spleen, lungs and kidneys are all screwed together.

"Mom, tell me, how can I chase a girl so that she thinks I'm serious?"

"If you're really serious... Be good, don't harm a girl from a good family."

Is this really my mother? _(:3ゝ∠)_

Unable to gain experience from my elders, I can only turn my attention to my peers.

This kind of experience, logically speaking, should ask someone who is married or not yet married but has already made up his mind, but unfortunately, all the people I know from my generation are still living, and one More than a làng.It was only at this time that I realized that the saying "Things of a feather flock together and people live in groups" is really true!My circle of friends is full of single dogs, and there is no single person. =_=

Although the gang I know is not reliable, but the three cobblers are the best Zhuge Liang, and they can always come up with some ideas by brainstorming... right?

After some intense discussion, I went to Baidu Sogou Tieba to make corrections, and finally decided on a three-step strategy for chasing my wife:

Step [-]: Get close to her, talk to her in various ways, and see if she likes women.Even if there is a slight tendency to bend, you can proceed to the next step;

Step [-]: Create a sense of presence in front of her in various ways.

The third step: take it back to the nest.Apply for a marriage certificate as quickly as possible.

So, the next morning, I made myself really beautiful, packed up a few clothes, and ran to the Tongzilou, where I was soft and coquettish and rolled around, and finally the boss was "moved" to let me into the house.

A good start is half the battle!Although his expression was a bit weird, as if he was looking at a silly roe deer that had to run into a trap.But this little detail was left behind by me when I saw the little fish sitting on the sofa.

I sat next to the little fish with a shy face wagging my tail, and then I chatted with the boss and the little fish in a serious manner, until late at night, and stayed at his house with the reason of "it's a little dark, and I'm a little scared." down.Good distance conditions for the next step!sprinkle flowers~

Three days later, I finally came to a clear conclusion that she was bisexual, a psychiatrist by profession, and a lover of reading.The most used clothing brand is xxx, the favorite lipstick brand is xxxx, and the favorite...

The first step is successfully completed, and then the second step is carried out. The specific implementation steps of the second step include but are not limited to: look at her circle of friends, space, Weibo, and see what books she is reading recently?playing what?buy what?Then find various topics to chat with her; study psychology books hard, try to make her feel a sense of empathy; take her to visit H city as an excuse, ask her out, take her to various attractions to eat, eat and have fun .Then after getting acquainted with her, give her a nirvana of love.

It's a pity that ideals are full, and reality is very skinny.

When I spent five days thinking about psychology, I was able to chat with her to improve our relationship, she threw out an extremely uncommon word, and then turned on the master mode, holding the audience.Finally, he smiled and asked me, "What do you think?"

I, I... can I use Baidu to read it?

Facts have proved that there is no way to pretend to be a master in the professional field by cramming.The road has been broken.

But it doesn't matter, because I still have plan b.

"Uh... I saw you were reading "XX Crime Book" in your WeChat reading, and the movie seems to be out, would you like to watch it with me?"

"OK!"

The x petal said: This is a horror movie with a suspenseful detective skin, and the score is quite high.According to the xx theory, horror movies can make the heart beat faster and adrenaline surge, and the possibility of a successful confession will increase by a few percentage points; moreover, if the girl is a little more timid, you can directly hold her in your arms when she is afraid , said to her: "Don't be afraid, I'm here, these are all fake!" At that moment, her boyfriend's strength exploded.