Bamboo horse and bamboo horse grow up together

"Unsent Letters"

-------Inner monologue

When will you come back? Didn't you just go on a business trip for a friend for a few days?I gave you a lot of money to the uncle in the security room and said, as soon as you come back, you can call me, but the news he gives me every day is that you haven't come back yet.He found out that you went abroad, it seems to be a battlefield, dammit, how can I believe his words, it must be the rumors spread by you, deliberately let the uncle spread lies to anger me.

I certainly wouldn't believe it, I'm so smart.

—— Yang Fan

Know why people are always prejudiced against us, why they despise us?

Because they think we are too messy, we are all at the age of hormonal bursts, and we can't always manage our own meat.So, a piece of mouse droppings ruins a pot of soup. People who don't know us, when they hear our identities, always think that we are indulgent, depraved bad people. We give people such an impression, how dare they call on them to understand us and respect us? We, after all, we can't even respect ourselves.

It's not your fault, the hormones of youth are too tormenting, you are still a child, I know this.

Please grow up quickly.

—— residual temperature

Yu Wen, we have been beaten to death before, our home was in a mess, we had a cold war to the end, and we swore to ignore each other to the death, I also felt inferior because of your education background and the shining back on stage, but I can I assure you with my life and everything I have, I have never loved another human being, never.

—— Yang Fan

No matter how good the cake is, if it's not yours, you can't cut it

I ate a cake abroad today and I had a toothache in the afternoon, I went to a medical clinic and while I was waiting, I had a test and they calculated my age based on my teeth and wow, I'm older than you Three years old, I forgive you. After all, I am three years older than you. Three years ago today, I also experienced the days when hormones were running wild in my body and my blood was boiling.

Well, don't be sad, I've been abroad for a few days, and I won't grow up with you in the past few years, don't eat cakes anymore, it's not good for your teeth.

—— residual temperature

The sweet-scented osmanthus blossoms in autumn are really fragrant, and the faint fragrance runs into the nose, and you can't hide it.I was rehearsing a play in a theater recently. Like you, I took the bus to and from work. When the bus stopped at the stop sign, a boy came up. There were obviously many seats, but he still stood at the door for many stops. I called him over. Sitting down, he shook his head, and after a few stops, a girl jumped into the car and embraced the boy.

The bus stopped at the entrance of your radio station. When the back door opened and closed, a lot of floral scents came in. If you hadn't left, both the floral scents and you would have come in.

—— Yang Fan

I have smelled the fragrance of sweet-scented osmanthus in foreign countries, and now it is the time for the fragrance of sweet-scented osmanthus in China. I hope we can break into the embrace of the same wind together.The days to go home are far away. I seem to fall in love with wandering. I have seen a lot in the days of floating like duckweed. If you are free and interested, I can tell you slowly.

—— residual temperature

We always had arguments, but when someone bullied us, it was always the same.

Look, I've been attacked again,

But, the days of fighting alone, I am weak like a puddle of mud

—— Yang Fan

I want to tell you something you dare not say.

Do you still remember that in the first year of high school, there was a tall and thin boy in our class who often called me to squat in the shade and play chess in the physical education class? You were not in my class at that time, so you probably didn’t know him.He is sitting right behind me, and I can't help but look back to chat with him from time to time. I know he likes pretty girls, and I know I like you, but I just can't hold back the thoughts in my brain, wanting to play with him, whenever he walks away I would sniff all the wind that passed by me, I would sniff it all into my nose, I want to see him smile, play with him, and walk into him crazily.

I know this is wrong, but I just can't restrain that thought in my head. In the end, I was almost tortured to death, and I took the initiative to apply for a transfer. In the end, when I was divided into arts and sciences, I chose I am not good at liberal arts.

You were the same as I was then.

Over the years, I have been relying on the pen to make a living, and I have also written many things against my will. After all, if I don’t write, someone will write for me.You see, I'm not a pure and sincere person either.

—— residual temperature

This winter, I went to the Northeast once. The snow in the Northeast is still so thick and big. Standing on a high place, it is a vast expanse of whiteness. Those who fought snowball fights on the snow with me back then, how could no one wrestle in the snow unscrupulously? It's over.

The snow was so heavy, and the children downstairs were making snowmen, which was really noisy.I was drowsy sitting next to the heater, and the people sitting with me were some old men in their seventies and eighties.

Yu Wen, I don't want to do anything these days, I just want to work hard to make money and wait for you to come back.

I really want to get old quickly. After we get old, we carry a sack of money to find a building in a corner, and tell everyone that we were married, but our wife passed away, and we come here to retire.At that time, we sat together under the wall to bask in the sun and clean our ears.It would be better if that place was isolated from the world. They don't know what homosexuality is and what discrimination is. They just think that we are poor widowed old men. Maybe by then, we won't have the strength to throw ourselves on the bed. It doesn't matter. We still have a lot of memories, besides, who stipulates that love only belongs to young people.

—— Yang Fan

I was in the United States recently, I am in this multi-ethnic country, but as of today, he has not legalized homosexuality, yesterday, the residents of this city held a massacre, a group of people held signs and went south, shouting for human rights , equality; another group marched north, holding religious signs.

The two groups of people met, and the voices were deafening. I stood on the side of the street and watched. There is no less prejudice against same-sex in this country than anywhere else. You see, human beings are prejudiced against things they don’t understand, but they are precisely in the prejudice. All can not be self-examination.

At that moment, I felt like an impartial referee, listening to the two groups of people arguing, both were reasonable and could not be refuted.Nature implants the gene for liking the opposite sex into a group of people, but feels that the world is too much the same, and the happiness is too similar, and then implants the gene for liking the different sex into a small group of people, but forgets to gather everyone together and start A meeting of equals.

I originally joined a group of people and held up a sign and raised my arms and shouted, but I didn't, it's not that I don't love you, it's just that it doesn't make sense, just love well, and don't care what others do.

However, others always want to come and control us.

—— residual temperature

I went to an awards show today. I haven’t been out for a long time. I received a doll from a fan. It’s pink and tender. I originally rejected this color, thinking that it’s only normal to wear black and white. , But recently, I like pink and tender colors more and more. I have a lot of pink, red and yellow clothes, all of which look good. I may not be young, or why do I prefer young and vibrant colors so much.

I did a fortune-telling recently, and the fortune-teller said, I may have a peach blossom in my life, a peach blossom, hahahahahahaha, are you happy, I want to wear my pink clothes and wait for the peach blossom, if you don’t come back, it will be forever No need to come back.

I'm telling the truth, I didn't lie to you.

I am drunk.

—— Yang Fan

My computer betrayed me. When I was writing a manuscript today, I originally wanted to type the word "clothes", but you were the first in the list of words typed. I pressed the space bar without thinking, and waited for your name to appear on the I was stunned for a few seconds when I was writing the manuscript. This happens often, so I miss you often. I changed the input method, and it was really difficult to adapt everything from scratch.Your name sounds nice, Yang Fan, Yang Fan, Yang Fan, Yang Fan, Yang Fan...

—— residual temperature

Recently, I like to smoke. The smell is not very good, and it is uncomfortable to smoke, but it is really boring and has nothing to do. Solved it myself.

Also, my acting skills are getting more and more backward recently, many people are very disappointed in me, I seem to be the worst one.I really can't imagine how strong Han Yu was to let me, a yellow-haired boy, be the male number one.I visited his parents, read his diary, and I understand him more and more recently.

By the way, I have been a little free recently, so I took a depression test. I seem to have drawn a lot of hooks, and my score is a bit high. When I was a child, I never got such a high score in the math test.

I'm probably going to take a few psych classes.

—— Yang Fan

I went to Canada today, there was a friend here, I went in for a stroll, loud music, lying lights, high consumption, fancy tattoos, and someone sprayed dirty words on me, my heart vibrated more than the music The range was still fierce, and I was really afraid of sudden death inside, so I hurriedly fled the scene.

It's good to be young, I may not be the main consumer group of the bar anymore, and it didn't walk into me.

The above words are just to comfort you, and it is true only if you read it in reverse. Don’t be angry, there is also a vast world for me outside.

—— residual temperature

I went to two psychology classes, those people were really miserable, I got into this, and it was too unconvincing to say that I was crying, the people who came to the class were all people with psychological problems, they were In order to obtain salvation, I only enrolled in classes.

The teacher inspired us to recall our childhood, and a group of people were crying. I think of my childhood, and it’s nothing. It’s the road I walked with you, but I didn’t feel hungry, did I?It seems that there have always been wind and rain in my memory, but I haven't seen it much. How much wind and rain have you resisted alone.I remember how many things my grandfather told you, why didn't you tell me a single thing, it seems that you are the real grandson, now I know, if you listen to your ears, you have to do work.

I feel very happy, so I didn't go to class, and I still have a little trouble, but when you come back, I will naturally recover.

—— Yang Fan

Recently, I discussed the same-sex issue with a group of young people. In order to prevent the estrangement and prejudice caused by clarifying my identity before, I disguised myself as a "normal person" and talked with them. At least two of them were same-sex couples, and they all agreed with me. Opinion, the same sex is abnormal and perverted, they don’t fight against me, you see, everyone is like this, in order to join the conversation I opened temporarily, to gain group recognition and a sense of security, they quickly agree with my point of view and abandon their own Judgment of right and wrong.

We are also like this sometimes. I really hope that they will call me stupid when they gather behind their backs, and then speak freely of their own opinions.

I've tried this experiment several times and never came across an argument, and I don't like this answer at all.

—— residual temperature

I went to have breakfast today. Two boys came out from the hotel next door and sat in the seat in front of me for breakfast.

One of the boys was fidgeting and kept moving his body on the stool

Another boy drank soy milk and looked at his uncomfortable partner with a smirk

very familiar youth scene

One of the boys had pimples all over his face, if it wasn't for the fact that there were people sitting beside him,

I thought that was you back then.

—— Yang Fan

I saw a couple of couples who proposed marriage on the road in Iran. They used to join in the fun. They were arrested by the police before they could propose marriage. Their system seems to not allow them to propose marriage in public. I was a little surprised, it’s not I cover the news scope, but I was curious, so I followed it up.Later, they were released, but they didn't seem very happy.

This is also the first time I have encountered this kind of thing. I thought it would only happen in the last century. Hey, I don’t know what to say, I want to go home.

—— residual temperature

Summer is here and no one is going to scoop out the sweetest middle piece of watermelon and feed it to me anymore.

When I ate watermelon at noon on the set, I didn't move a piece. It's not that this year's watermelon is not sweet, but, but what?

Forget it, it will be sweet when you come back.

—— Yang Fan

Outside, I tell jokes, no one can pick up my jokes

You see, I haven't watched Quyuan Zatan, heard cross talk, and sketches with me since I was a child, but I just couldn't chat together.

No one agrees with my humor, it's boring.

—— residual temperature

I met that boy on the set again. When he passed me, I took a deep breath. You must be very angry. Let me explain to you.

He has your smell on him. I don't know what kind of smell it is, but as long as I smell it, I can think of you and feel at ease. I thought that this wonderful smell would never be found second in the world. Personally, but when he passed me, I could catch the smell instantly, and then my heart beat wildly and my blood rushed.

I'm almost 30 years old, not like two years ago, I'm a big kid now, I used my will to suppress my physical reaction, and successfully forgot the feeling brought by my sense of smell.

I can understand what is love and what is responsibility.

Growing up is a bit difficult. I am afraid of losing you forever. I wish you safety abroad with my life.

—— Yang Fan

Yang Fan, I seem to have been tamed by you, you are really a master tamer.

I joined a documentary team, and I took good care of each of them. The girls in the team sat on the plywood and asked me: "Who taught you so perfectly."

I looked at the sea level happily, happy because I was praised, looking at the deep blue seabed, I suddenly got goosebumps all over my body, it was you, it was you, Yang Fan, who trained me so well, so I have no temper.

If you say what you want, I will always give it to you. If you act like a baby with me, I will always nod. You know, I always give you the best.Your career destined you to be a sensitive and insecure person, so under the surface of your joking, there is always a little anxiety, and I will give you comfort when you need it most.So, I've developed a knack for always using my best words to comfort everyone on the team who is unhappy, and effectively processing information during arguments.

I can cook whatever you like. The delicious food made me very popular with the team. They even wanted me to stay as the chef.It's all because of you, because there is no food you don't like, I tried the recipes one by one.

I thought I was the smarter of the two of us, now that I think about it, you are, you don't have to do anything, just stand in front of me, pinch my face, shake my hand, you know, I can do anything Do it, like you take me on a bike, and I fall down first to catch you when you fall.

You have great wisdom, I have never noticed it, after all, I am willing to do all of this.

I want to learn your coquettish skills, but when I awkwardly said "OK~" on the splint, the whole sea level was still, everyone looked at me like a monster, I really wanted to jump into the sea and never Floating up, I was ridiculed for a long time because of this sentence.

—— residual temperature

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