[European style] go home

That night I was on patrol at the headquarters gate under the orders of Sergeant Major Gowers.It was originally an open space, but now it is full of various military vehicles of the German army.If there are guerrillas hiding here, they can easily shoot at me in the gap between vehicles, and I can't find their position like a headless chicken, so I can only shoot around blindly.In this case, I must die.

Thinking of the word "death", I couldn't help shivering, and shrank my head into the raised cotton collar.I'm 17, just out of high school, and my life is just beginning.False dreams of being a pilot aside, my original plan was to work in a library, where there must be a shortage of librarians like me.Although I sat in the first row in the real school (①), it was all the fault of damned mathematics, without which I would definitely have entered the liberal arts school (②) and successfully entered the university.

I still have a lot of things to do, I haven't reconciled with Helmut, I haven't gone home to spend time with my parents, I haven't seen the saplings I planted when I was a child grow up healthily... I am so young So much so that I never seriously thought about the suicide note.Who thinks about death in their teens?

At this point I was really utterly flustered, and I felt my limbs begin to shake uncontrollably, but it wasn't from the cold.I looked up at the clear night sky, so densely littered with bright stars that it looked like light from a hole in the floor of heaven.

So, after my death, am I eligible to ascend to heaven?Will I meet the saints and the Mother, and even the Father? ...

Just as I was thinking wildly, a loud voice suddenly sounded from behind me, which really startled me: "Hey! Sentinel, what are you in a daze for? Which company are you in?"

I turned around tremblingly, and there stood before me a well-dressed officer—someone must have come to the headquarters, or they wouldn't have put on the uniform.I looked at him, involuntarily clenched the butt of the gun in my hand, took another breath, and then answered cautiously: "I am from the 7th company, and my name is Schumann."

"Major Gravetz, don't you bother the soldiers today?" Another voice with a smile came from behind him, this voice was clear and sweet, much better than that of the major.

"Captain von Kagneck!" Major Grawitz, turning to see the man, greeted him cheerfully. "You're back from Verone! I'm glad to see you unscathed. "

Captain von Kagneck smiled, then turned to look at me.I almost cried out in admiration when I made out his form in the darkness—the young officer was dressed in the most splendid black SS uniform, with an eagle A black hat with a large brim and a skull emblem was worn on top of his neatly combed blond hair, and the pure black lapel warm long coat outside the uniform set off his slender body.I can assure you that if there is a girl here, she will fall in love with him immediately!

"Major Grawitz, may I bring one of my friends to the party?" Captain von Kagneck asked. "This is Mr. Schumann, a young but brave soldier who has just finished Two hours on duty."

Major Grawitz frowned and looked at me carefully, and finally agreed for his sake: "Okay, but you can't run around!"

And I was still immersed in the excitement of him remembering my name, completely unaware of where I was about to go.The three of us walked the parking lot in a strange formation: the two officers walked side by side in front, talking while walking; A nose that was red from the cold.

I put down my weapon on the porch of this palace-like villa full of Eastern European style, and followed Captain von Kagenek into the Kharkov German Command building that I had never stepped into.The moment I stepped into the gate, I couldn't help but be amazed by the exquisite Ukrainian architectural art.The luxurious crystal lamps hanging from the roof contrast with the arched stairs on both sides that surround the balcony door behind. The walls and ceilings are full of colorful Orthodox murals. The whole hall is resplendent and resplendent. The interior of the Hagia Sophia that I have visited is not much better.

Until then, from a tall Christmas fir tree full of gifts placed indoors and Christmas bells all around, I didn't fully realize that today is Christmas Eve!

No wonder the hall was full of officers and their beautiful wives in their best costumes!Everyone's face was radiant, even the Russian prisoners of war who served as waiters had put on clean new clothes. Although the Orthodox Christmas had to wait for ten days, who would not be infected by the joy overflowing from the scene? ?

After Captain von Kagneck greeted all his colleagues who came to say hello to him, I took a few steps closer and said cautiously: "Merry Christmas, Captain von Kagneck."

"Merry Christmas, Schumann." He took two small goblets from the waiter's tray and handed me one of them with a friendly smile on his face. "Have a glass of good vodka." .”

I took the glass and took a sip.In fact, I haven't had vodka since I've been here, even though my friends rank it among the best things to keep warm.I am not used to the taste of strong alcohol, but at this moment I had to drink the wine in the glass, not only because it was an order from the superior, but more importantly, the invitation came from the handsome From the mouth of Captain von Kagneck.After drinking a cup, my abdominal cavity burned violently like a ignited firewood. A burst of heat spread from inside to outside made me stretch my limbs, and this warmth even climbed up to me. cheek, making it burn red—maybe.

At this moment, melodious classical music sounded, and it turned out that the band played the first piece of the dance.Forgive me for not having any artistic attainments, so I can't tell which piece of music it is, but there is no doubt that this ignited the atmosphere of the scene, and everyone came to the center of the hall to dance elegantly with their partners.

As a young and handsome officer, Captain von Kagneck became the focus of the ladies present, who rushed to dance with him, from one end of the hall to the other, from the beginning to the end of the piece , They didn't give him any chance to breathe, it could be seen that he was already getting tired.

I sat in the corner watching all this with interest, but what caught my attention even more was the variety of delicious snacks here, and I even had gingerbread that tasted very similar to the ones my mother made at home.You know, it's been a long time since I've had a real sweet tooth!

I don't know how long it took, maybe more than an hour, the band finally stopped playing, and the audience suddenly fell silent.Immediately afterwards, a beautiful woman in a dark blue dress walked to the center of the hall, smiled at everyone, and sang the popular song "Lily Marlene" (④).Although to my ears, the German version of the lyrics is not as beautiful as the English version sung by Marlene Dietrich (⑤), her demeanor is indeed somewhat similar to that beautiful Hollywood actress place.

Just as I was engrossed in admiring the female singer's performance, a voice suddenly sounded in my ear: "Do you want to go out and get some air?"

I looked back and found Captain von Kagneck looking at me.I knew that I couldn't refuse any of his requests, so I simply agreed.We bypassed the crowd, gently opened the balcony door and walked out.The surrounding air suddenly condensed, and everyone spoke like smoking a cigarette.

"You dance very well, Captain von Kagneck," I complimented.

"Thanks," he replied, "why don't you come dance with me?"

"I'm a terrible dancer," I shook my head. "In fact, no one taught me how to dance when I was a kid."

"I'll teach you." I was flattered by his words.But before I could say no, he took my hand and put the other on my waist.He led me a few steps, and suddenly realized that I was dancing a lady's dance at the moment, so he smiled and said "sorry" and adjusted our movements, and now I put my arms around him.

"One, two, three, four..." He danced, counting the beat.Under his guidance, I quickly entered the state, and within a while, I learned well.This made him overjoyed. "You're a quick learner, Schumann. I think you're smart."

"Thanks." I'm so shy that the vodka I drank earlier climbs up my face again, and it gets worse when I feel the heat of his words on my neck.I thought I must have looked very embarrassed at this point.

"Are you drunk? Don't drink too much vodka, it's not the same as our wine." He looked at me and reminded intimately.

I nodded, but it seemed like I was really drunk, I felt dizzy.Taking advantage of the strength of the wine, I suddenly said: "...Albert, call me Albert."

He was obviously taken aback for a moment, then smiled with some embarrassment, and replied, "Okay, Albert."

"Walter." I looked at him and laughed like a fool, "I have to go back to my bed. Goodbye, Walter."

"Goodbye, God bless you." I still remember his voice and intonation when he said it. I have always had a good memory, especially good at remembering things that I think are important.So even though it's been three months, I still remember everything about that Christmas party.That was the last bit of joy I felt in 1942.

The author has something to say: ① "Sit in the first row": In German schools at that time, those who sat in the first row had the worst grades, followed by the second row and the third row.So sitting in the front row is a very humbling thing.

② Liberal arts middle school: a type of general complete middle school in Western Europe.There is a strict promotion and repetition system and a graduation examination system. Only graduates who pass the examination are eligible to enter the university, which is the only ladder to enter the university.

③Verone: A city along the Don River, near Stalingrad.The Eastern Front at that time.

④ "Lily Marlene": German song.The song was so loved by both sides in World War II that there were even scenes of Axis and Allied soldiers fighting in the trenches singing it at the same time.

⑤ Marlene Dietrich (1901.12.27—1992.5.6): Born in Berlin, Germany, German-American actress and singer.The English version of "Lily Marlene" she once sang became the favorite song of soldiers from both the United States and Germany in World War II.