Second Piano Concerto

After Ah Si said this bitterly, there was no sound for a while.His hand slipped from Qin Haiou's shoulder, clamping Qin Haiou's arm tightly, staring blankly at the messy tabletop for a while, two lines of tears suddenly flowed from his eyes.

"Yuyou..." He muttered softly, "Where have you been?...Don't go, don't go...I still owe you 200 yuan and haven't paid it back..." As he spoke, tears flowed more and more A lot, tears poured out of his red eyes, and there were messy tear stains on his face, and after a while, the snot also flowed out, dripped over the oil stains on his mouth, and gathered together with the tears on the tip of his chin. fall down.He supported the table with his left hand, and grabbed Qin Haiou with his right hand, shaking his head between the two, shaking all over his body.

"I, I love you so much..." he choked up, "accompany you to climb... the snow mountain, cross the grassland... What's so good about that bastard! You run away... run away with him, what should I do! What the hell should I do? !what to do……"

The more he talked, the more excited he became, and the more excited he cried, there was no dry place on his face, and tears, sweat, snot, and saliva were all in one ball.Qin Haiou was held by him with all his strength, unable to move or dared to move, turned his head to look at the balcony, and saw Tan Shuo listening to the mobile phone walking back and forth on the balcony, gesticulating in the air with his hands, as if very anxious.So he dismissed the idea of ​​calling Tan Shuo back, and carefully straightened Ah Si's body a little bit. He was full of sympathy for him, but he didn't know how to comfort him, so he could only persuade him dryly, "Don't cry."

Ah Si lowered her head, not sure if she heard it, but she cried even harder.He withdrew his left hand from the table, but knocked a wine glass over with his elbow. The glass rolled to the floor and shattered. Unconscious.He grabbed Qin Haiou's arms with both hands, raised his wet face, and begged hoarsely: "Yuyou, come back... come back!" As he spoke, he slid down, followed by a "pass" Kneeling on the shards of glass all over the floor.

Qin Haiou hastily tugged at him, but he couldn't move.At this moment Ah Si finally let go of him, as if he didn't feel any pain, he hugged a table leg instead, like a lump of soft and stubborn mud, crying and pressing his forehead against the wood.

Qin Haiou looked at him motionless, and suddenly felt an indescribable sadness.

Qin Haiou has never been in a relationship, and he doesn't know much about the ambiguous hints between men and women.He was playing the piano when his peers first fell in love;If he ever had a lover, it was his piano.He knows that people who are in love are happy and people who are out of love are sad, but he just knows that.He never thought that a man could be so hurt by his feelings that he could cry bitterly.He didn't understand what happened to Ah Si's body, but Ah Si cried so sadly, as if his heart had been shattered like glass all over the place, and could never be glued together again.Qin Haiou suddenly had a feeling of deja vu.He remembered the first time he heard Puccini's opera "Madame Butterfly" when he was a child. At that time, he didn't know a foreign language, and he couldn't understand a word of what those beautiful voices were singing. The intense emotions deeply affected his emotions, and the emotions of grief, despair, conflict and struggle had touched him before he understood the whole story.When he was young, he sat in front of the record player and suddenly burst into tears, which scared his parents and sister.

There is no Madame Butterfly in Qin Haiou's life, and Ah Si's story is probably not Madame Butterfly either.But this feeling was so similar to what he remembered, which made Qin Haiou feel sad and blocked.

Doesn't everyone have a sad thing in their hearts?Is there anyone in this world who is carefree and free from worries?

Qin Haiou thought of all the things that happened after that concert. After all, he failed the expectations of others, but he just couldn't control it.He even developed an aversion to the piano, as long as he saw the piano at home, he couldn't wait to avoid it.He fled that world in embarrassment and came to this small town surrounded by mountains. He wandered around the town every day, forcing himself to see the scenery that had nothing to do with the piano, and think about people and things that had nothing to do with the piano. However, only he himself knew, The confusion that he suppressed in his heart is increasing day by day.He is like a giant in the piano world, but once he leaves that world, he seems to know nothing and can't do anything, like a fragile baby who can only be taken care of by others, but is unable to take care of others.When he recalled the journey he had traveled over the past twenty years since learning the piano, he was surprised to find that he could no longer remember why he wanted to learn the piano, and why he had the idea of ​​escaping.This road, once considered by everyone, including himself, to be a bright road, has now disappeared without a trace.He didn't know where to find the way, didn't know which direction to explore, and didn't even know if he had the courage to play the piano again.He locked these pains and confusions in his heart, but he couldn't restrain them from growing wildly there.He grew up surrounded by the halo of everyone's expectations, and now that something like this happened to him, he couldn't even find a way to ask for help, let alone vent his distress to the outside world.Looking at Ah Si who was drunk and crying bitterly, he couldn't help feeling a lot of envy.It is said that getting drunk solves a thousand worries. He never drank alcohol to play the piano. At this moment, he suddenly had the heart to go all out. He looked up at the wine glass on the table and saw that there was only half a glass of wine left in Tan Shuo's glass, so he poured the wine into the glass. Picking up the cup, without looking or thinking, he raised his head and drank the remaining wine.

Qin Haiou swallowed half a glass of wine in one breath, the cold rice wine rolled down his throat and into his stomach, it didn't cause any discomfort, on the contrary it was sweet like drinking a drink.So he turned over the wine jars on the table one by one, poured all the remaining wine into the cup, and drank as much as he poured out.Normally, he would never do such things like searching for bowls and scraping dishes at the dining table, but for some reason now, after drinking two cups of rice wine, the cold feeling became hot, rushing straight up from his stomach , warming his heart, and the worries in his heart seemed to be dispelled by the heat.He tasted the sweetness, and continued to search in the wine jar. After a while, he felt hot all over his body, and his head was dizzy, but it was indescribably comfortable.

He drank happily by himself, so he wanted to move the bamboo chair forward, but when he moved his leg, he bumped into Ah Si who was still slumped on the ground.At this time, Qin Haiou was no longer sober as before, and he didn't know what to do.His arm was originally very strong, and he let Ah Si lie on the ground because he was polite and cautious before, but at this moment he just wanted to lift Ah Si up, so he grabbed Ah Si with both hands and lifted him up, Ah Si felt as if he was being trapped. The koala that had stripped its trunk was dragged by Qin Haiou all the way to the sofa.

Qin Haiou threw Ah Si onto the sofa and took a breath.Now his vision is a little shaken, his feet are unsteady, his head is swollen and hot, and his temples are throbbing.He didn't think about whether he was drunk or not, and fell down next to Ah Si. Ah Si suddenly woke up, opened his eyes in confusion, looked at him for a moment, and opened his mouth: "Yuyou..."

"I'm not Yoyo." Qin Haiou said.

"It's not Yoyo." Ah Si said.

"Yes, not Yoyo. I'm Qin Haiou."

"It's not Yoyo." Ah Si said.

"You're drunk," Qin Haiou said, "I seem to be drunk too."

"It's not Yoyo." Ah Si said.

Qin Haiou decided not to talk to this man anymore.

"Let me tell you," Ah Si seemed to have finally opened his mind, and leaned forward to grab him again, "There are only two kinds of women in the world... one is the one who has already dumped you, and the other is the one who is about to dump you , only brothers are for life... for life!" After speaking, he patted Qin Haiou heavily.

Qin Haiou was shaken by Ah Si's slap, and Ah Si finally stopped admitting the wrong person, which made him feel very good.He listened to what Ah Si was saying, and felt that he also needed to say something.He used to not speak out his thoughts casually, but now his desire to confide is very strong.He turned this idea around in his mind, and said: "When I first started learning the piano, I didn't know whether I could play it well...but the teachers said I played it well, so I thought I played the piano well." Well done."

Ah Si nodded: "Me too... I used to be an office worker with a stable salary, but Yoyo said she wanted to experience the romance of Sanmao, so I resigned and accompanied her to find romance."

Qin Haiou said: "Then I gradually discovered that I seem to be playing very well... I can easily play the running sentences and passages with complex rhythms that other students find difficult, without feeling strenuous at all... Don't worry." Some students need to play many times to memorize the score, I can remember it after playing it once... other students need to practice the piece for a week, I can practice it in two or three days..."

A Sidao: "Then we went to the grassland, entered the desert, and climbed the snow-capped mountains on foot... We boiled rainwater when we were thirsty, and ate compressed biscuits and canned food when we were hungry... Once we didn't take a bath for more than ten days, and we grabbed each other's hair The lice in the bed are like monkeys...but we think it's romantic...we wish it was so romantic to death..."

Qin Haiou said: "After I won the award, everyone said that you can play better... I think so too... So I went to find more difficult pieces to practice. The audience liked my technique, I can't let them down... There are many difficult songs in this world. I practice them one by one, and I can feel at ease until I get the approval of others... Otherwise, I don't think I am qualified to stand on the stage. on stage."

Ah Si said: "Later we were penniless and had to go back to the city to find a job... At this time, Yoyo began to regret, she said that I only know how to play, but don't know how to fight... She also said that she wanted to find someone reliable, Someone with a stable job, who can give her a sense of security, will spend the rest of her life...but I can't be relied on, I don't have a stable job, and I can't give her a sense of security..."

Qin Haiou said: "But...the more people who agree with me, the more afraid I am to face them...the more pieces I master, the more worried I am about making mistakes during the performance...I don't know when I started, I'm getting more and more nervous. From the day before the show, I've been thinking about the piece I'm going to play the next day, and I can't even sleep well...I don't want to tell other people, but they still know...they I thought of many ways, and I worked very hard, but none of them worked, none of them..."

Ah Si said: "I know... Yoyo blamed me because she refused to admit her innocence at the beginning... But I still like her... I can't bear her... When she left with that person, Take out the 200 yuan left on her and give it to me..." Ah Si couldn't go on talking, holding her head in her arms for a while, and gradually broke down in sobs.

Qin Haiou didn't look at Ah Si, he just looked at his hands.He said a lot of words intermittently, and he seemed to feel a little more comfortable in his heart, and seemed to be even more uncomfortable.He looked at his hand, the countless fragments of broken memories were like torn scores, the broken five lines were like the broken strings of a kite, and the falling musical notes were like dazzling raindrops, falling on him one after another, causing him to be shocked Surrounded by feelings of loneliness and helplessness.He looked at his hands, and after a long silence, he murmured again: "I always feel that I just keep playing the piano because I am too good at it... If you ask me why I play the piano, I just want to know Come up with this reason."

After speaking, he fell down on the sofa beside him in a daze.