What should I do if the object of the date is my first love!

After that day, Yan Dong never saw Feng Yuanlin again. Feng Yuanlin didn't know about his name change. After he blocked him, he came to the school to look for Yan Dong twice. Knowing the classmate who had chickenpox, Yan Dong asked the classmate in advance to just say that he didn't know him. After a few times with no results, he never heard of Feng Yuanlin coming to ask him about it.

Nearly 7 years have passed, during these [-] years, Yan Dong was fortunate countless times that he did not make the final step with that trash for revenge, and did not really become the kind of person that Feng Yuanlin said would do anything for revenge at all costs, He didn't sell himself out of hatred, he did think so, but he didn't, and he could actually mosaic himself and destroy Feng Yuanlin, even if he didn't have himself, that photo would be enough to make him suffer if he showed Sheng Chunqiu , but he didn't, even though he still hated them, he didn't make it to that step.

He stood in front of the abyss, but he never took that step.

He clearly knew that he hadn't become that kind of person, but at the moment he met Feng Yuanlin today, he was still led by the nose, and he loathed himself like a sick man.

Yan Dong, who had calmed down, thought about his reaction just now, and realized that the shadow Feng Yuanlin had cast on him was far more serious than he imagined.

He sat opposite Yan Dong, wearing a thin blanket that still smelled like Qin Haoming, convincing himself in his heart: I'm not, I'm not trash, I'm different from him, I didn't, I didn't hesitate to sell everything for revenge, I didn't, I didn't hesitate to bottom line hurt others.

I'm not that kind of person.

He said as if to assure someone: "I didn't do it in the end... I didn't do that kind of thing for revenge..."

Qin Haoming looked at him, sighed deeply, and said, "Brother, you can't do this, and you... don't take yourself seriously."

Seeing the confusion in Yan Dong's eyes, Qin Haoming stepped forward, put the hot water cup aside, he took his hands that were no longer cold and gently kneaded them: "You can't take yourself so seriously... You can't sacrifice yourself for that kind of garbage...you shouldn't even do it for me...you have to cherish yourself more"

Listening to his words, Yan Dong smiled wryly: "Qin Haoming, if you had any expectations of me before, you should know now that I am no longer Midsummer, and you should be able to see that I am not even a normal person. Man, I'm just... sick..."

No, he didn’t want to say this, he had thought it through, after telling him everything, he had to admit his mistake and ask his forgiveness, if he was still very angry and didn’t want to be with him, he would try his best If you keep chasing him, you will make yourself better, and you will become the midsummer that he liked before.

Instead of being like this now, relying on his liking, to test how far he can tolerate himself.

Obviously promised to be together well, obviously he himself said to be honest with each other, obviously he did something wrong, and he was the one who hurt the other party, but at this moment, before every word he said, it seemed like a scar was cut on his heart , but he talked more and more like an addiction.

Qin Haoming clicked his tongue, turned his hand over, and said lightly: "Mr. Yan, I found out that you really don't take my words seriously. I said it clearly. If you say something bad about my brother again, I will kill you." Lock you up, don't you forget about it? Or is this your purpose? You just want me to lock you up?"

Yan Dong was pulled by his beating hand, but he didn't pull it out. The more Qin Haoming was like this, the more frightened he was. Qin Haoming pinched his red palm that was slapped: "...Brother, in fact, I found out before that it is Are you too demanding of yourself? You are not a saint, not a god. As a person, you can be selfish, hateful, stupid, make mistakes, and not always be kind and sunny. I like you. I don’t understand why you are so To separate the you now from the you ten years ago, in my opinion, no matter you are called midsummer or severe winter, it is you, you are my dream ten years ago, and you are my dream. The hope of the past ten years is also my happy every minute and second in the past few months. You said it yourself, I am the person you want to live your whole life, how can you forget it?"

Yan Dong let him hold hands: "...Aren't you angry?"

Qin Haoming originally blurted out and wanted to say, I'm not angry, but after a long silence, he said: "...I'm actually very angry. When I heard him say how close he is to you, I couldn't be more angry, but now, I would rather you met him at the beginning." To a nice guy, happily in a relationship, I'd be jealous to death, but, at least that way, be happy in those times I'm not around, so you can maybe believe it now, I like you , is sincere."

Yan Dong no longer struggled, he whispered: "I believe... I... because I believe, I want to tell you this matter, I... really want to tell you."

He should have said it on the day I had noodles with him in Chen Sanye's cafe, but he dared not, dared not confirm whether he could accept himself like this, even if he said that he was no longer midsummer, but He still didn't dare to show him the most despicable side of himself, so he never dared to mention it. He didn't dare to talk to him about it until he came back from Three Nights Villa and he was absolutely sure that Qin Haoming liked him.

Make this matter clear and settle it, and then, you can invite Qin Haoming to live with yourself and yourself, as if you really want to live a lifetime, with daily necessities, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea.

Knowing how unreliable these words are, he still couldn't help but defend himself.

When Qin Haoming heard his words, he gently hugged him in his arms, and stroked his back with his hands without any embarrassment: "...I know, I believe in you."

Yan Dong let him hold him, and gradually felt at ease: "I didn't make it to the end with him... and I didn't print those photos... I didn't hurt anyone..."

Qin Haoming was hurt by his words. Every time he said a word, he responded by saying, "I know, he is a boyfriend who is full of condemnation for how dark and hateful he is. With the malice under the hatred that he can regret for a lifetime, he planned a plan." A revenge, and this revenge only hurt himself from beginning to end.

Then because of this revenge that only hurt himself, he loathed himself to this point...

In the end he...

"Brother, you don't need to be perfect, and you don't need to live for other people's expectations, whether it's someone else's or mine. You're already, really amazing, and what you've done is already good enough."

"...but I made you sad..."

"Well... there is a little..." Qin Haoming nodded and admitted: "But you did everything in the end, so I have to forgive you."

"...It's because of you."

It is because of you that I was able to make the only correct decision when I was so stupid.

Yan Dong hugged him back: "I will become good, I will work very hard, become enough to be worthy of your liking, I will..."

Qin Haoming rubbed his head lightly and sighed: "Brother, you must not like me at all, so you can't remember what I said, I don't need you to become better, you are the best, always have been, I I want to be with you, I want you to never have to go through those things alone in the future, I want to be able to accompany you and support you, I am your lover, not your little follower, although I am willing to be your little follower , but..." Qin Haoming said with some complaints: "It's agreed to be together well, and it's for my own good if you don't make up your own mind, why don't you count your words?"

Yan Dong was speechless, feeling a little speechless. He buried himself in Qin Haoming's arms, and after thinking for a long time, he suddenly realized what was wrong with him.

I belatedly thought about what Qin Haoming just said, why did he distinguish himself so clearly from midsummer ten years ago?Why do you always try to catch up with your former self?

He and Sheng Xia were originally alone.

He is the midsummer who has experienced darkness and is no longer innocent, he is the midsummer who has walked through the mud and got up again, midsummer is a spoiled child in a paradise built by a lie, and when the lie is exposed and falls from the false paradise, that The overly beautiful hypocritical shell cracked, and it became the current severe winter.

The imaginary enemy he tried to chase was his once perfect but fragile self.

I don't need to catch up with "midsummer"?

He showed a moment of confusion: Then I am all this, what are you trying to figure out?

Holding Qin Haoming in his arms, he suddenly felt relieved. He seemed to have finally removed something. It felt a bit like standing in front of the door looking for the key for a long time, only to find that the key was in his hand when he looked up.

Like a cat chasing its own tail.

What have I been drawing all these years?

He leaned against Qin Haoming's arms, relaxed his body, and felt a kind of exhaustion, and a rare relief after exhaustion. He recalled what he said to Feng Yuanlin just now: See?I am very happy, and will continue to be a kind of happiness.

That was just what he said at the time to provoke him deliberately, but now, he suddenly believed it, Feng Yuanlin, he is just a person with a dark heart and a miserable life, no matter what he gets, he will never be satisfied, and he will never feel I don't want to be happy, so I can't see other people's happiness.

All he did was jealousy, and in the name of justice.

And a lie itself is a lie, he just exposed a lie that will be exposed sooner or later, and tried to attract attention with hatred.

A pathetic lunatic.

An insignificant lunatic.

He will live happily ever after, not for anyone to see.

Not to stimulate Feng Yuanlin, nor to reassure Lin Ye and Yan Lili.

But for myself, together with Qin Haoming, to live happily ever after

Qin Haoming was on the plane early in the morning the next day. He came back for such a short night, which seemed meaningless for a short time, but both of them knew that something had changed.

In the past few months, Yan Dong thought that that was already the happiest state he could feel, so happy that even if they separated one day, relying on those good memories, he would be able to spend the rest of the lonely life happily Life.

And when everything was said and done, he realized that he could be happier. Every day when he woke up, he was full of anticipation for the new day. No matter whether it was because he was too busy with work to date, he just thought about being with him. Another day was added to the time, and there was another day in his life with Qin Haoming's imprint, which made him feel happy.

Waking up in anticipation, falling asleep in satisfaction, feeling that I love him a little more every day, and just being able to love him more makes him feel happy.

The weather is getting colder and colder, Beijing's autumn is as fast as her wind, sweeping swiftly, leaving only golden leaves.

"The Witch's Tavern" was safely launched amidst the attention of the public, and the download volume even surpassed "The Nasty Knight" on the same day, becoming the dark horse of Jinqiu due to idle games.

The long front line of "Odd Star Continent", which was originally not expected, has received the fruits of victory in a timely manner.

Everything is getting better.

Yan Dong was afraid of this sign at first, and everything seemed to be getting better, which proved that life was about to come out again and step him into the quagmire.

But he suddenly had infinite courage.

Let him be enough to face the mirror and say: Come on, fucking life, I'm not afraid of you.

The author has something to say: emmm last chapter

changed 7 times

It should be ok to change it again. The plot of the last chapter is quite important, so I have to change it.

and so late today

It's because I'm traveling and this youth hostel is very noisy ==

There is a fat man with a particularly low quality who has been noisy until this time, isn’t it scary?

Also lock my chapter, I'm so angry

I feel super clear