I am not human

"Hey, okay, don't be angry?"

Liao Qingshu: "..."

"...Is that enough? It's just a ghost..."

Liao Qingshu: "..."

"Cheng Chengcheng, in this way, if he comes back, let him stay here, okay? The premise is that he comes back by himself!"

Liao Qingshu: "..."

"...Okay, can I accompany you to look for it when I'm free? It's okay!"

Liao Qingshu: "..."

"Fuck!...Tomorrow! I'll look for it tomorrow! I'm satisfied now!" Jiufang Ziyan stopped the battery car angrily, and shouted without looking back: "Now, get out of the car!"

Liao Qingshu left the back seat silently, handed the helmet back to Jiufang Ziyan, and left with a straight face.Jiufang Ziyan restrained and took two deep breaths, then walked into the mountain management office, but was startled by the heavy atmosphere in the office as soon as he entered.

Jiu Fang Zhongjun, who is a director but rarely appears on camera, Xu Moyi, who is in charge of personnel and takes care of everything, Lin Hongle, a mountain and sea patrolman who always sleeps more than awake, and Xiao Hei, the technical director. If Lord Thor is disguised as a generator, then all the members of the Mountain Management Office can be said to be gathered now.

And all of them have solemn faces.

"That..." Under such a serious atmosphere, Liao Qingshu was embarrassed to get angry again, and raised her hand weakly and asked, "Excuse me about the tree that ran out of the mountain and sea realm..."

"It's Shengmu Mandui." Jiufang Zhongjun said.

Liao Qingshu was stunned: "Sacred wood... is it so big?"

"Shengmu Mandui, also known as 'Tingmu Yajiao', is said to bear the fruit of wisdom." Jiufang Ziyan also frowned, "I thought this kind of sacred tree was taken away by the eastern heaven long ago. .”

"It should have been taken away." Jiufang Zhongjun said, "According to the information left by the former director... that is, your father, the sacred tree and the sacred beasts near this holy tree Mandui have already been taken away by the Eastern Heaven Realm. At that time, the visiting celestial beings wanted to dig up this sacred tree and transplant it to the back garden of the emperor of heaven, but he himself grabbed the ground with his roots and refused to leave. Someone else's plaything, whoever dares to touch it will kill him... probably like this."

As soon as these words came out, the four people present except Xiao Hei showed expressions of surprise.It was the first time for Lin Honglexian to know about the relationship between Jiufang Ziyan and the former director, so she couldn't help but look at Jiufang Ziyan twice more; Xu Moyi's surprise went even further—she couldn't figure out that in Jiufang Zhongjun's memory, she would never How the Former Director of the Bling Race Golden Retriever Birthed a Pit Bull SonLiao Qingshu's point was entirely on the four words "Oriental Heaven". Obviously, he did not expect that this small broken unit that couldn't even pay the rent, water and electricity could be connected with such a high-end vocabulary as "Heaven". superior.As for Jiufang Ziyan——

"He wants freedom!" the man wearing sunglasses yelled in disbelief. "He's a tree! As a plant, all you need is sunlight and water!"

"Obviously, he doesn't think so." Xiao Hei replied calmly, tapping on the keyboard with his long and slender fingers, "If a little photosynthesis can satisfy him, he wouldn't try his best to escape. I Managed to get the dream fragment of the dream traveler who extradited him... I have to say that he has spent a lot of painstaking efforts to escape this time, and his methods are way higher than those monsters who only know how to bite and bark."

"Dream fragments... Is this kind of thing still available?" Liao Qingshu asked in surprise.His mouth had hardly been closed since entering the room.

"It's okay for me." Xiao Hei said indifferently, "It's almost like finding a video. But unfortunately, it can't be shared."

In this case... Isn't there a suspicion of nonsense?If it's something only you know, no one can refute you even if you insist that the tree climbed down from the Tokyo Tower.

Liao Qingshu had doubts in his heart, but seeing that the people around him seemed to have no objection to this, he had no choice but to suppress the doubts in his heart.As if seeing his suspicion, Xiao Hei showed a sneer, which made Liao Qingshu feel uncomfortable.

Jiufang Ziyan stretched out his hand and carried Liao Qingshu behind him, gave Xiao Hei a warning look, then turned to ask Lin Hongle: "When did that tree escape?"

"Sorry, I'm not very clear about this." Lin Hongle apologized.

"What is not clear?" Jiufang Ziyan asked.It was Lin Hongle's responsibility to inspect the situation in the mountain and sea world and find the escaped mountain and sea beasts in time.

Lin Hongle scratched his head: "Well, how should I put it... In short, the spirit of the tree has gone away, but left the original body to continue to grow in the mountain and sea world, so there is no clue in the breath. If not When I went to Kaiming, I happened to find that soulless exorcism shell, I’m afraid I still don’t know about it until now.”

"If we guess based on the time of the dream, it was about a month ago." Xiao Hei continued, "The good news is that the dream traveler is a local, and the initial location of the escaped mountain and sea beast is based on the location of the extradited person." It depends, from this point of view, we are not completely at a disadvantage - after all, we still have available contacts on this land... if creditors can also be counted as contacts."

Jiufang Zhongjun sighed: "One month... For a monster with a high IQ, it is enough for him to learn how to hide himself. Maybe he has already taken a plane to Hawaii. The sun is very good over there."

"Don't think about it, the prerequisite for going abroad is to have a passport..." Jiufang Ziyan said, suddenly slammed his hand and pulled Liao Qingshu: "I know how to find him, follow!"

"Ah? What?" Liao Qingshu was dragged out by him at a loss.Xu Moyi slowly raised her hand: "Hey, that's right! I just... ordered a supper." Seeing the two of them disappearing outside the barrier, she paused.Forget it, I'll give the extra two servings to Xiao Hei, who just happens to eat a lot recently.

Urged by Jiufang Ziyan, Liao Qingshu stepped into the car in a hurry, while putting on his helmet, Liao Qingshu asked, "Where are we going?"

"Go to a snake demon first, and if it's not right, then go to someone else." Jiufang Ziyan replied, and suddenly started the car, almost throwing Liao Qingshu who was still sitting still.Liao Qingshu hugged his waist in shock, raised her head and asked, "Why are you looking for the snake demon?"

"That snake demon is secretly dealing in false certificates..." Jiufang Ziyan paused, then his voice suddenly dropped: "Hey, relax your hand a little bit."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Liao Qingshu suddenly realized that she quickly withdrew her hand.As soon as Jiufang Ziyan said this, he understood that Zhongyin is hidden in the world, and now the Liworld management system centered on the Wanwu Academy keeps in touch with the residences and territories of various monster races. If you want to hide yourself, the best way is instead Mix in the crowd.And if you want to live in the crowd, you need the necessary documents.

Originally, all kinds of offices have the business of helping immigrant monsters to obtain false certificates. Even the down-and-out management office can help with most of the certificates.But there are also some monsters who are proficient in personnel affairs, and simply avoid the firm and secretly start the business of issuing false certificates, exclusively for the use of non-humans who want to avoid people's eyes and ears.

The snake demon lady is also one of them.She came from a low family background and had no family to rely on. Because she was negligent in cultivation and her magic power was not high, she lingered in the world with her beautiful skin.Most of these country monsters are homeless. They are not only despised by noble monster clans such as the Qingqiu fox clan, but also often coveted by some wretched guys because of their beauty. It's not as good as a half-demon under the shelter of the All Things Academy.

The nature of snakes is obscene. Driven by their nature, most snake demons will hang out in nightclubs and other places in red light districts, making a living mainly from skin and flesh. In comparison, this lady can be regarded as clean and self-sacrificing. Her current job is to Doing live broadcasts online, relying on social software from time to time to find handsome men to have sex with, the small life is quite comfortable.In the past two years, she had no choice but to make money by making fake certificates because of her livelihood. Later, because of the Ministry of Exorcism's vigorous crackdown on the fake certificate business, and she gradually figured out the way to make money by live broadcasting, the fake certificate business Basically do not do.It wasn't until a month ago when a beautiful guy came to her door that she was so fascinated that she reluctantly resumed her old career.

But she never expected that it was that "reluctance" that caused her a big trouble.

It was almost ten o'clock in the evening, and she was trying on the newly bought lipstick in front of the mirror, preparing for the upcoming live broadcast, when the doorbell suddenly rang.She walked over to open the door indifferently, but as soon as the door opened a crack, she regretted it and quickly pulled the door back.

"Hey!" Jiufang Ziyan slammed the door tightly and said angrily, "Bug, you dare to close the door for me!"

"If you don't open it, you won't open it! If you want to mess around, I will complain to you!" The snake demon screamed, but his voice was a little trembling.She is not one of those mountain and sea beasts who have only been frightened by Jiufang Ziyan's small fights. She has fought head-to-head with the chief Jiufang back then. There was a conflict, and Jiufang Ziyan broke his tail on the spot, and he lay on the bed for more than half a year to recuperate, and now his joints still hurt—no, that's not fighting at all, it's hanging and beating at all!

She didn't know that Jiufang Ziyan had lost most of his spiritual power, and the snake demon who had lived for hundreds of years was shaking like a sieve at this moment.Jiufang Ziyan hammered on the door for a long time, but suddenly there was no movement.As soon as she spat out the snake letter, she quickly closed the door, but she dared not look out from the cat's eyes.

At this moment, there was a loud bang, and the anti-theft door that had been installed in her home for a year was reimbursed.

She herself was also knocked to the ground by the violent impact, she raised her head hastily, and saw Jiufang Ziyan walking through the door carrying a shiny golden X stick, followed by a young man with curly chestnut hair, holding a It is a small red ball with a flocculent barrier behind it.

Two men broke into her home!Still holding a vibrator and a vibrating egg in his hand! !Do you want such a heavy taste! ! !

Liao Qingshu smiled apologetically at her, and conveniently put Hongyu back into her pocket.Just now Jiufang Ziyan got angry and wanted to blow up the door. He couldn't persuade him for a while, so he hurriedly set up a sound-proof barrier before Jiufang Ziyan fired the cannon, using the technique copied from An Muxi .Fortunately in misfortune, the enchantment is clothed, as for how many decibels it can separate, I don't know.Now he only hopes that Jiufang Ziyan can restrain himself a little.

"Well, hello." He squatted down, trying to look harmless, "We are managed by the mountain management, we have a question to ask you..."

Jiufang Ziyan interrupted him impatiently, and asked straight to the point: "Have you ever helped a tree demon obtain a false certificate recently? If so, nod your head and shake your head if not. Hurry up, we're rushing to the next one."

"Uh, I..."

"Hesitating, that's it." Jiufang Ziyan pointed a small light cannon at her forehead, "Where is he?"

"I, I don't know..." The snake demon couldn't help crying, "I, I just helped him get an ID card..."

"Then do you still have any impression of the information on the ID card?" Liao Qingshu asked gently.It made him feel ashamed to make a pretty girl cry.

The snake demon shook his head: "No... He, he was very cautious. After getting the certificate, he deleted this part of my memory."

Liao Qingshu's expression became strange upon hearing this.Jiufang Ziyan explained: "Some capable monsters can indeed do this, nothing surprising."

"Uh, I know, it's just..." Liao Qingshu faltered and didn't say any more, but his expression was still weird.Jiufang Ziyan looked at him puzzled, turned his face and continued to press on the snake demon: "What do you remember?"

"I, I really didn't..." The snake demon was sobbing, and before he finished speaking, he saw a golden light gathering on the X-stick on his forehead, and immediately said sharply: "I still remember! I remember he asked me... …Ask me if I can get a student ID card!”

Jiufang Ziyan and Liao Qingshu looked at each other, and continued to press the snake demon: "Student ID card? Why does he need a student ID card?"

"I don't know... He just asked me if I could apply for a student ID card for University A, and wanted a card. I said I was not familiar with human universities, so I couldn't do it, so he, he just said forget it..."

"University A?" Liao Qingshu repeated thoughtfully, looking at Jiufang Ziyan, "He wants to go to University A?"

"University A?" Jiufang Ziyan also repeated very seriously, but his tone was full of doubts and enlightenment, "What is University A?"

"It's the nearby university, 985." After Liao Qingshu finished speaking, he nodded to the snake demon and said, "The information you provided is very valuable. Thank you very much for your...uh, cooperation."

"No, you're welcome?" The snake demon stammered back, staring at Liao Qingshu with astonishment as he forcefully broke away Jiufang Ziyan's hand holding the X stick, and half-dragged him out of the door. Forgot to leave cash as compensation for the door.

The snake demon shivered for a while, and finally got the strength to get up.She staggered to the table and quickly put on her makeup. She took a deep breath and took another deep breath. Finally, she calmed down and started today's live broadcast beautifully.

"Hello." Suddenly, Jiufang Ziyan's impatient voice came from behind her. She was pointing at the camera and yelling at a certain Jiufang whore. Her body softened, and she immediately slid down the chair, tears streaming down her face. He came out: "Master Jiu, Master Jiufang, I'm a slave... I'm a concubine... I didn't do it on purpose... I know I was wrong..."

"What's wrong?" Jiufang Ziyan was confused, and shouted out the door again, "Wait a minute! We're castrated!"

Castrate?Who is he going to castrate?

The snake demon was stunned, and then cried even harder: "Don't, Master Jiufang! I was wrong, I shouldn't scold you, and I will never pretend to be a woman again, cheating guns, cheating rewards and asking others to give me gifts, don't be eunuchs!" Get rid of me! My mother is the only cub!"

"How many litters your mother gives birth to is none of my business? I want to eunuch..."

"What are you doing to me again!" Liao Qingshu rushed back angrily, "Did the cigarette drop? Where did it drop! It's obvious that you put it in my pocket for trouble..."

Liao Qingshu dragged Jiufang Ziyan away.The snake demon sat on the ground shaking for a long time, finally supported the table and got up, glanced at the live broadcast room that had been blown up, raised his head and wailed: "What the hell is this—"

Under the isolation of Liao Qingshu's barrier, her voice was not heard by people outside.A creeper leaf lying outside the apartment wall trembled slightly when it heard the sound, and transmitted the trembling frequency along the vine, leaf by leaf.

The same frequency has been transmitted to the whole creeper, and then passed to the nearby sycamore through the creeper, and passed along the sycamore tree on the street, and the sycamore tells the information to a potted plant on the balcony through the leaves. The bonsai told another bonsai, and one tree told another...

Until finally, the vibration frequency of the leaves traveled through several streets and was transmitted to a succulent plant in a flower pot.It vibrated its thick blades very seriously, demonstrating the movements accurately.

"Ah, that's it, they know about the school." Beside Suorou, a boy with a clean and delicate face was nodding slightly with his chin in his hand, "But it's expected. If they want to come looking for it, let them do it." Anyway, I will definitely not be the one who regrets it.”

He smiled nonchalantly, stretched his waist slightly, and a call came from the living room behind him: "Muman, are the flowers ready yet? It's time to eat!"

"Okay, senior! Here we come!" Muman agreed, stood up, patted the shirt on his body, and a touch of green flashed across his thin white fingers.