Cai Wei

【Eight】

The bombing continued for several days, and the hut where Lin Ximing and I temporarily lived was not spared.

During yesterday's bombing, a shell clamored to hit the house that had been borrowed for nearly three months.It was Saturday, and Lin Ximing and I went out to buy some food. The hawkers were buying green vegetables covered in dust on the ruined walls.Unexpectedly, the air defense alarm sounded before all the desired items were purchased.All of a sudden, the vendors’ vegetable baskets fell to the ground, and people flocked and scattered like birds and beasts. When the bombing was over and Lin Ximing and I came back, we saw only the winter clothes that had been drying while we were still hanging on the broken laundry poles. The bed where the old dream was temporarily sent during this period was overturned by the air current and flew more than ten meters away.

Lin Ximing and I looked at each other, and couldn't find any other modifiers to describe our mood at this moment except helplessness.

Being homeless, I went to my colleagues at Tsinghua University, hoping to find a temporary place to live. Lin Ximing stayed in the almost ruined place, trying to find something to take away.

Fortunately, the house that Professor Zhang Xiruo rented was a double room. He only needed one room, so he rented the other room to us.When I went to visit, he was a little worried about whether the two of us would feel cramped in a room.I had no choice but to smile slightly and said that the current situation does not allow picking and choosing, but although Lin Ximing and I have different surnames, we love each other as brothers and don't care about it.He didn't say anything anymore, just made an appointment to have a few drinks together after moving in.

When I went back to find Lin Ximing, he was standing beside a wooden trailer, looking at the ruins in front of him.It was almost dusk, the setting sun slanted the shadows, and the traces of the bombers flying by seemed to still remain in the sky. The glow of the sun shone through the thin clouds, and it was really as oppressive and thick as blood.

I stepped forward and hugged Lin Ximing's waist from behind. He was a little taller than me, and I rested my chin on his shoulder, "What are you doing in a daze?"

He glanced at me and pointed to somewhere in front of him. I looked in the direction of his finger and saw a sloping lime wall covered with a layer of blood orange by the evening sun.I vaguely saw a red figure, and my heart shuddered.In fact, such blood marks are not uncommon these days, but... this is a complete... person.

The shock wave of the bomb hit the wall heavily, crushing it into a human-shaped meatloaf, which naturally left such a complete human imprint.

I didn't know what other reaction I should make other than being silent. I felt the hands around his waist being covered by him, and the temperatureless sun silently took away the last ray of sunlight and sank below the horizon.

"Let's go."

"Let's go."

【nine】

The continuous bombing by the Japanese army put the whole of Changsha in panic.Before I left Beiping, I wanted to write a book about the manners of scholars in the Spring and Autumn Period, but because the war has not continued, and the current situation, I don’t know where to find relevant materials, and I don’t know if these materials will be available after the war. Whether to keep it... What's more, I don't know when the war will end.

Due to the war, the Changsha Provisional University Standing Committee decided to continue southward and move to Kunming.Kunming is located in the southwest, far away from the front line, and there is the Yunnan-Vietnam Railway that can lead to foreign countries, so there is a more reliable transportation channel for purchasing related equipment and books.If the inland land falls in the end...you can also use the Yunnan-Vietnam Railway to travel outside to preserve the last cultural fire for the Chinese nation.

The Standing Committee finally decided that Changsha Temporary University will be on winter vacation from January 1, and the teachers and students of the school will report in Kunming on March 20.

In the last class I taught in Changsha, I looked at the young and immature faces in the audience, decided not to speak the "Spring and Autumn" that I had prepared, and turned to write Yue Fei's "Manjianghong" on the blackboard.

Angrily rushed, lean on the railing, rested in the rain.

Lift our sight, the sky and shouts, grand, vehement.

Thirty fame, dust and soil, eight thousand miles, clouds and moon.

Don't wait to be idle, white your head, empty and sad!

Jingkang's shame is still unresolved.When will the hatred of courtiers be eliminated?

Drive a long car and cross the Helan Mountain.

Aspirations hungry for the Hulu meat, and laughed and thirst for the blood of the Huns.

Be from scratch, clean up the old mountains and rivers, overturned Que!

I wrote very quickly, the handsome lowercase letters were connected together, and there was some emotion that was about to burst out, bursting out in the lines of Chinese characters.Every stroke, every word, every time I raise my hand and put down a pen, every time I recite silently in my heart, it seems to flash back to the picture, the bombing with thick smoke, the mother of Besko at the station, the one curled up in the luggage The child next to him, the unkempt professor holding the sauerkraut jar, the people who fled under the shells that day, the bloody human print, the one standing against the bloody setting sun, standing between the fallen wooden beams and the rubble everywhere. on my love.

There seem to be thousands of emotions in my heart that I want to pour out. Those images that I can only face in silence on weekdays suddenly turned into some kind of fuel, maybe firewood, maybe coal, maybe oil, maybe saltpeter, gunpowder, It is a flammable and explosive emotion.That kind of powerless helplessness, that kind of indignation of having more than enough heart but not enough energy, that kind of long-simmering grief and anger, all piled up into a higher and higher pyre, waiting for a spark to leap up.

After writing a word, I feel that my face is covered with sweat, and it's hard to say.

I suddenly understood the meaning of Yan Zhenqing's "Nephew Memorial Manuscript", and it was so emotional that it could really resonate with the words.

"The last lesson", I put down the chalk in my hand, "I want to talk about Yue Fei's "Man Jianghong" with my classmates."

"We all know the background of this poem. At the end of the Song Dynasty, a large area of ​​the Central Plains fell into the hands of Jin soldiers. Yue Fei was heartbroken when he saw this scene, so he wrote this poem. We should also know that this poem expresses his anger directly from his heart. And resentment, and the desire to serve the country. But these are not what the teacher wants to discuss in this class."

I stood still on the podium, "In the face of national crisis, how should we defend our home and country?"

"Since ancient times, scholars have been handed down to the present, all of which are proud and proud." I walked between the desks, "Su Wu in the Han Dynasty was unyielding to the Huns, which is called steadfastness; Fang Xiaoru refused to surrender to Zhu Di, calling him a martyr."

I looked at those faces that could still be called children, and my mind gradually cleared up, as if some dense mist was dispelled by the early morning sunshine, and the confusion that had troubled me for a long time turned into a firm determination with my words belief.

"We praise their integrity and admire their strength of character, but what have they done for their country? Have they changed anything?"

"At the end of the Qing Dynasty, Tan Sitong reformed and reformed. Before he was sentenced, he wrote a poem "Inscription on the Wall in Prison". The last sentence of the Jueming poem said, "If we go out with a roar to the sky, we are from Penghao people", so he was generous. To die. He sacrificed his life to seek the law, and the Reform Movement of [-] was the beginning of ideological reform.”

"It goes back to the beginning, and it is read in the tomb. There is also Wang Yangming who unites knowledge and action, and with the insight of a scholar, he strategizes and wins thousands of miles away to defend the land of the Ming Dynasty."

"I am not from Penghao, so I should have other means to serve the country. If I am not a person who holds guns and cannons, but entrusts my life here, is it not a waste of money? If you really have a skill, if you have the heart to serve the country, If you apply what you have learned, where can you not serve the country? Those who are good at using words may record the facts and keep them as documents, or they may devote themselves to propaganda and call more people to resist Japan. Those who are good at chemistry can also research new weapons and manufacture weapons that meet the current conditions Weapons are used in the army. Those who are good at geography may not be able to explore the terrain and draw detailed terrain maps?"

I stood in front of the students and smiled slightly, "I especially like this sentence in Mr. Lu Xun's previous article "Have the Chinese Lost Their Self-Confidence?" mutual encouragement."

"'Since ancient times, we have had people who worked hard, some worked hard, some pleaded for the people, and some sacrificed their lives to seek the law'", I saw the light in the eyes of the students, as if A bright hope, "'...Although the so-called 'official history' is equivalent to the genealogy of emperors, generals and ministers, it often cannot conceal their brilliance. This is the backbone of China.'"

I walked back to the podium, and in the eyes of those young people, I saw a warm flame, a flame that could illuminate the way forward.

"I believe", that is an indescribable comfort, I finally found the purpose of my existence in this troubled world, "the path that my classmates have walked and will walk."

"Both are the brightest future of our Chinese nation."

That's right, to be a teacher, to preach and receive karma to solve doubts.As long as the culture of a nation is still there, the spirit is still there, and there is still a future.

A class discussion where everyone expresses their opinions is a bit depressing, and there is still some confusion in the childish expressions of the children, but it doesn't matter, those hopes still exist, and the light will definitely come.

As the end of class was approaching, the classroom returned to silence. I silently wanted to go up to the stage. I watched the students sitting below the stage with the cynical expressions that should be expected at this age. I remembered that they argued a while ago and said that they would wait for the winter vacation to join the army. And the last lesson before this winter vacation will probably be a node in the fate of all of us.

Maybe some children will shed their blood on the battlefield and die for the country; maybe they will encounter bandits, get sick, or even lose their lives on the way south; maybe they will not go south, and stay in the place that will fall and wait for the light; maybe... ...this will be the last side.

I wrote a poem on the blackboard at the end.

The water is discharged to the ground, and flows from east to west, north to south, respectively.

When get out of class was over, I bowed slightly and said solemnly, "Treasure".

Watching the students leave, I saw the last person walking forward quickly, writing a sentence under my writing on the blackboard quickly.

There will be times when the wind and the waves cleave!

After writing, bowed deeply to me, "Take care, sir, and see you in Kunming."

I was a little surprised. This student was the one who most wanted to join the army and go to the front line. For some reason, he changed his decision now.

"Mr. must be very surprised." His face was still very immature, with a sense of innocence, and a stubbornness like a newborn calf, "but what you said is right, my current battle is nothing but a useless life. I read Those who have studied, I will use what I have learned to find a more effective way to serve the motherland!"

As the young man said, he suddenly smiled shyly, "I actually really admire you sir."

I looked at him with some puzzlement.

"I have an uncle who has never been educated. He has always felt that the Chairman's insistence on the war is a stupid act. If he had complied with Japan's conditions earlier and paid more money, wouldn't he be able to return to a stable life. I am at home From time to time, I heard him yelling at the chairman for only wanting to get rich from the war and collect more taxes from the people. Whenever this happens, I am very glad that I have studied and listened to the teacher's class."

"Those national righteousness and family and country feelings, those unyielding will and integrity are all taught by my husband."

"So," he raised a smile full of sunshine and hope, "please continue to teach the students, sir."

He bowed deeply to me again, turned and left.

I stood there, watching his leaving figure, and then smiled.