miss a useless name

11.

"Mom, I'm staying at a classmate's house tonight, and it's raining too much." Yu Yan stood in front of the window holding his mobile phone and called Lin Qiuhua. From behind, his shoulders and back were slightly stiff, and he seemed a little tense: "No, his grades Well, first in grade."

After saying this sentence, Yu Yan didn't say anything for two or three minutes. I don't know what Lin Qiuhua said on the other side. In the end, Yu Yan just responded softly: "Understood, thank you mom."

He hung up the phone and stared at the phone screen in a daze.

Cheng Shen came over with a glass of lemonade, and the warm glass stuck to Yu Yan's forearm: "Finished?"

Yu Yan seemed to have just realized it, nodded and took the cup: "It's over."

Cheng Shen looked at his expression, and there was a bit of undisguised worry hidden between the brows, so he asked, "What's the matter? Your mother said you?"

Yu Yan took a sip of lemonade, and the slightly sour taste flowed down his throat into his lungs.He explained: "No, she's just a little worried."

"worry about what?"

Yu Yan put the cup on the table, reached out and grabbed the waistband of his trousers and lifted it up: "I'm worried that I will learn badly, I have never stayed at other people's house when I grow up."

Cheng Shen was a little surprised. Recalling his childhood, his mother often had no time to take care of her due to work, and when she was tired from playing with the children, she took advantage of the opportunity to spend the night at other people's homes.Later, when I grew up, I became a brother when I was young, and I played like crazy after studying, even day and night, and staying overnight was commonplace.

"But it doesn't matter," Yu Yan said, "I told my mother that you are the first in grade. If she doesn't believe me, I'll show her your test paper."

When it comes to study, Yu Yan's energy is back up again.He turned around the room to find his schoolbag, picked it up from the ground, and then grabbed a handful of pants.

"The opportunity must not be missed, and it will never come again." Yu Yan hugged Bao and said solemnly: "Such a beautiful day, Cheng Shen, can you give me a few more questions?"

First of all, Cheng Shen didn't see where the beautiful scenery came from tonight's heavy rain, and secondly, he didn't want to understand why he still had to study since it was a good day.But looking into Yu Yan's eyes, he realized that his thirst for knowledge had probably reached a fiery level, and he didn't have the heart to say "no" for a while.

Cheng Shen let Yu Yan sit on his desk, and watched him take out his homework book, exercise booklet and pencil case, and put them on the table neatly.Just after taking a shower, her hair was still wet, and the short stubble swept across the neckline due to the movement, and it was dizzy with water marks.

"Hey wait..." Cheng Shen pointed to the bathroom: "There is a hair dryer in the cupboard, dry your hair before writing."

Yu Yan stroked his hair, looking a little tangled, it seemed troublesome.

Cheng Shen's heart itch.Yu Yan is not the same as when he first met, the frost of indifference and alienation gradually melted away, and the distance between the kindness piled up on the appearance and the seemingly introverted personality was slowly shortening.He seems to have seen a more real Yu Yan, he will be dissatisfied and complain, and he faintly learns to refuse.

"My hair dries quickly," Yu Yan pouted to discuss, "I don't want to move it anymore."

Cheng Shen is happy to see such a change, and feels that he cannot let it go away.He couldn't help softening his tone, and said persuasively: "You will catch a cold. If you get sick because you don't blow your hair in the rain, I won't be sorry."

This trick is really useful, after hearing what he said, Yu Yan took action immediately.

The hair dryer hummed, and the scalding wind blew through the soft hair.Cheng Shen looked down at Yu Yan's exercise book, took a pencil to highlight the key and difficult points, and scribbled down the hints.

Even so, he still couldn't calm down.

Until Yu Yan kicked the slippers again and appeared in sight, with white insteps and ankles that could be held with one slap.

Cheng Shen raised his eyes like a frightened bird, wanting to look elsewhere, but uncontrollably fixed his eyes on Yu Yan's face.

Yu Yan was a little bored, so that he gave Cheng Shen a resentful look.He didn't know how many times he grabbed the waistband of the trousers tonight, and pulled it up together with the underwear inside, complaining dissatisfiedly: "Your trousers are too big for me!"

With a "puchi", Cheng Shen laughed.At the same time, he found that his chaotic mood calmed down a little bit.

At 11:30 in the evening, Yu Yan and Cheng Shen each occupied one side of the desk, and the room was so quiet that only the sound of the pen nib scraping the draft paper could be heard.The gentle desk lamp enveloped the green youth, and cast their shadows on the opposite white wall.They were separated by some distance, but they seemed so close.

After an unknown amount of time, Cheng Shen pushed away the chair and stood up.The slender knuckles tapped the book in front of Yu Yan twice, and asked, "Are you hungry, can I bring you potato chips?"

Yu Yan stopped writing, and looked up at the alarm clock. In the past, Lin Qiuhua had hot milk and a small fruit salad before going to bed in the kitchen at this spot, but now it is considered "under the fence", so it is not easy to make so many requests.

"Don't eat." Yu Yan licked his lips, and handed the empty glass to Cheng Shen: "One more glass of lemonade, thank you."

Cheng Shen stared at Yu Yan's lips for a few seconds, took the cup and went out.When I came back a few minutes later, the lemonade was replaced with pure milk, and I brought a ham sausage by the way.

Yu Yan let out a "huh", his eyes widened like a deer.

"Why is it milk?" Yu Yan hugged the glass, it was still hot.

Cheng Shen guessed right but didn't take credit for it. He bit the ham sausage's coat with his teeth and tore it up before saying to Yu, "I'm afraid you won't be able to sleep at night."

Yu Yan took a big gulp in satisfaction, ate the whole ham sausage, and tugged at the waistband of his trousers, feeling that it wasn't so loose.He glanced suspiciously at Cheng Shen beside him. The man was sitting upright with his head down reading a book, with earphones plugged into his ears, and the white thread stretched all the way to his trouser pocket.

Yu Yan moved closer, and Cheng Shen noticed that Yu Yan was one step ahead of him when he was about to take off the earphones.

"Why?" Cheng Shen looked at Shang Yu Yan appreciatively.

Yu Yan asked what was in his heart: "You grew so tall just by drinking milk and eating ham?"

Cheng Shen snatched the earphones back and signaled Yu Yan with his eyes to see that what was in his mug was lemonade and not hot milk.

"Genetic problem." Cheng Shen was very irritating: "I don't like to drink milk." After speaking, he glanced at Yu Yan, pulled off the other earphone, and wound it up slowly on the MP3: "Who did I drink my milk for? Someone knows."

Yu Yan was shocked, and recalled that every morning since he knew Cheng Shen, he was forced to stuff a carton of milk. Now seeing the pair of long legs in front of him that couldn't fit at a glance, he felt that God was so unfair.

He gulped down the milk, and slid to Cheng Shen's side with his homework in his arms.Since the height is doomed not to catch up, let's work harder on study!

Cheng Shen paid for his milk and had to give lectures to others. He continued to tutor until 12:30. He couldn't stand it any longer. He fell back on the bed, almost furious: "I'm so sleepy."

Yu Yan's spirit is exceptionally good, presumably the glass of milk hasn't worked yet.He asked, "What time did you go to bed last night?"

Cheng Shen lifted the quilt and got in, as if refusing to communicate: "It's three o'clock this morning."

No wonder so sleepy.These days, Xueba is working so hard, so there is no reason for me not to work hard.

Yu Yan said "good night" to people in advance, and planned to fight fiercely for another two hours.

Cheng Shen quickly fell asleep, breathing lightly and evenly.

The rain gradually subsided, and the wind blew up at night.Yu Yan was blown upright, sneezed softly, got up lightly and went to close the window.

When he turned around and saw Cheng Shen trapped in the quilt, Yu Yan found it strange, and suddenly admired the fate between people.

Just a month ago he couldn't have imagined that he would have such a friendship one day.

Yu Yan touched the pants on his legs——

It was determined that Cheng Shen was his brother who was so close to wearing a pair of pants.

At 02:30 in the morning, Cheng Shen woke up suddenly, and when he opened his eyes, he saw the figure bent over the desk in front of the desk.

The headlights in the bedroom were turned off, leaving only a lamp for light.Yu Yan was probably working on a math problem, quickly calculating on the scratch paper.The broken hair hangs down, making him look very obedient and gentle.

His own T-shirt was too big for him, and the shoulder line dropped to his shoulders, revealing his fair and beautiful side neck and thin shoulders.

That unknown emotion began to clash in his chest again, and in the quiet and silent night, Cheng Shen peeped at that beautiful luminous pearl like a thief.

Can't think any more.

Cheng Shen sat up from the bed quickly, his voice hoarse: "Yu Yan, stop writing, come and sleep."

Yu Yan was startled by his sudden sound, and looked against the light, his eyes were extraordinarily bright: "Why are you awake, did I disturb you?"

"No." Cheng Shen waved to him: "Go to sleep, it's getting late."

Yu Yan's heart skipped a beat, and he felt that Cheng Shen's waving looked like he was beckoning a kitten.He smiled and packed up the stationery, knelt on one knee on the bed and leaned over to look at Cheng Shen, knowingly asked, "Where should I sleep?"

Cheng Shen was speechless, lifted the quilt to wrap Yu Yan in, pressed his waist and asked, "Master, do you want me to clean up another guest room for you?"

Yu Yan nestled on Cheng Shen's chest and giggled, feeling that the hand on his waist rubbed against him was hot and itchy, he subconsciously wanted to avoid it, but couldn't help but want to get closer.

After making a fuss for a while, Yu Yan hid half of his face in the quilt, grabbed a corner and asked Cheng Shen, "Are you not sleepy anymore?"

Cheng Shen got out of bed to turn off the lamp, the room was dark, only the shadows of the trees dancing in the wind.

"After a good night's sleep, the sleepiness is gone." Cheng Shen got into bed again: "What about you, aren't you sleepy?"

Yu Yan closed his eyes and felt it, and said honestly: "I'm not sleepy, maybe I'm too excited to sleep in someone else's house for the first time."

Cheng Shen put his hands behind his head: "Why are you so excited about this, you're learning to be high."

Yu Yan was noncommittal: "I can't help it, I have a monthly exam this weekend, so what if I'm not happy."

Cheng Shen paused: "I think you are very hardworking."

"It's not bad." Yu Yan said modestly: "Maybe I'm not talented enough, no matter how hard I try, I'm not as good as others."

In the darkness, Cheng Shen paused again.Yu Yan's grades are basically stable in the top ten of the grade, he is puzzled, where is the limit of this "not as good as".

"Why do you think so?" Cheng Shen carefully chose his words: "The top ten in the grade are not talented enough?"

Yu Yan faltered, and replied: "Maybe? I don't know, anyway, my father and my mother think that my thoughts are not in the right place."

It's not that Cheng Shen has never met parents who are very demanding of their children, but the attached high school is already the best high school in Nancheng, and the top ten in the grade is a ranking that no matter how crowded the students are, they can't earn it.Reaching this height has basically been locked in advance by the highest universities in the country. Unless you are a genius, how can you not bother?

"You feel the same way yourself?"

"I……"

Yu Yan muttered, if he said he didn't bother to think about it, he was really sorry for burning the lights every night.However, it seems that no matter what he does, how he fights, how hard he tries, how he proves, his parents always seem to be dissatisfied.Because his talent in one aspect overshadowed the other, they felt a crisis, fearing that their son, who had been obedient since childhood, would lose control.

Cheng Shen recalled that he had asked Yu Yan if he didn’t want to study science during this period of silence. At that time, Yu Yan’s response was very frank, saying that he really wanted to study liberal arts, but he changed his choice on the eve of submitting the form.

He guessed that Yu Yan's "desperation" is also related to this.

The night is the best booster for confession, Cheng Shen has never been so eager to understand a person's thoughts.He couldn't help but compare his own way of getting along with others. He could fight or quarrel, and he could talk a lot, but he never cared about inquiring, just to understand each other better.

"At the beginning of this semester," Cheng Shen said slowly, "Our Chinese teacher circulated your composition to the class. The topic of the composition that time was "If the Wind Has Color". The teacher read on it, and we read it on the bottom. Listen, I remember very clearly that the first sentence you wrote was—'The world is colorful and gorgeous, with love and hatred in full color. If the wind has color, its name should be life and death.'”

The world is so tempting, tangible things must have color, literati prefer to describe, even love and hate can add color with their pens.But as spring goes and autumn comes, there is wind everywhere, but there is no wind.A gust of wind blows through the jungle, a gust of wind blows through the snowy trails, and the scenery of the four seasons changes alternately. Everything grows and dies. It starts with the wind and ends with the wind. Looking back, it's just a dream of life and death.

At that moment, Cheng Shen felt that he had been hit.

Cheng Shen asked softly, "Yu Yan, what is your dream?"

The topic changed too quickly, but Yu Yan understood, and even silently clenched his fists, with little force, he made a few creases on the quilt.He closed his eyes and whispered as if giving up, "I have no dreams."

How can people have no dreams, whether they are unconstrained or unrealistic, what is missing is the courage to speak out.

Cheng Shen didn't force it, but just said to himself: "At that time, I was thinking how transparent the life of a person who can write such a sentence must be."

The topic was picked up unexpectedly again, Yu Yan felt longing, and began to yearn for the affirmation he had dreamed of.He turned his head slightly, looking for Cheng Shen's eyes in the thick darkness: "I..."

Cheng Shen looked over and groped for Yu Yan's clenched palm.The fingertips were lifted, and the curled fingers were straightened, touching the thin sweat on the palm.He was very patient, and made a nasal sound with ambiguous tenderness: "Huh?"

Yu Yan felt that what he had loosened was not only his palms, but also his heartstrings that had been tensed for ten years.Those expectations and requirements that are burdened on the body, at this age that is still unable to fight, while choosing to accept, you can also place a confession.

Therefore, the hand that the young man shook gave him enough courage.

"Say it, don't laugh at me." Yu Yan laughed first, and slowly confided in Cheng Shen's inclusive comfort: "I...I want to be a writer."