miss a useless name

49.

Cheng Shen slept with his arms around him until midnight and had a ridiculous dream.

He dreamed that he invited a group of clients to go to the sauna. It was so hot that the elders were shirtless and covered in sweat, and the sweat pooled into water, reaching ankle depth.Later, he couldn't bear to take a shower, and the hotter he showered, the more he sweated, and he got wet again after putting on his clothes, which directly woke him up.

After waking up, looking at Yu Yan in his arms, Cheng Shen couldn't help scolding his mother.

God damn sauna, he hugged an automatic "humidifier".

"Yanyan," Cheng Shen lifted the quilt and shook Yu Yan's shoulders. He was caught in some kind of nightmare, and he was sweating, and his pajamas were almost wrinkled out: "Wake up, Yanyan."

Yu Yan was frowned by him, looking so hard to wake up, his face seemed to have been drenched by water, strands of broken hair were wetly stuck to his forehead, and large drops of sweat slid along the corners of his jaw into his neck.

That part of the neck is like a piece of white porcelain soaked in water, smooth, delicate, and looks fragile, as if it could be broken by any big movement.

Cheng Shen was a little flustered when he realized that he couldn't wake up Yu Yan.He hooked his neck to hold Yu Yan up, the sweat on the man's face instantly soaked his chest: "Yu Yan, don't sleep, wake up."

Yu Yan groaned, as if a hand was vigorously dragging him to the point of no return, he didn't struggle, and even wanted to sink, but there was a "thud, thud" in his ear, who's heartbeat was so fast, and he directly pushed that One hand was scared away.He returned to the flat ground, and the moment his feet touched the ground, the pain intensified and engulfed him.

His face was slapped, Yu Yan slowly opened his eyes.

The heart fell back to the chest, and Cheng Shen's body sank suddenly, feeling a layer of cold sweat on his back.

But soon he discovered that Yu Yan was not really sober.His eyes are empty, without any focus.

Yu Yan's lips and teeth were slightly parted, his breath was trembling and ethereal, his tongue licked the tip of the knife, his mouth was full of blood, he muttered unbearably.

"What?" Cheng Shen didn't hear clearly, and put his ear to Yu Yan's lips.

He swallowed hard, his breath was shallow and cold: "... so sad."

"What's wrong with you?" Cheng Shen touched Yu Yan from head to toe: "Is...you did it too hard?"

Yu Yan closed his eyes again, struggled slightly to push back, trying to push Cheng Shen away.He looked very uncomfortable, his mouth was sticky, like a cat moaning: "...don't touch me."

Cheng took a deep breath and caught Yu Yan's dream in a few words.He often asked Yu Yan what he dreamed about, and Yu Yan would tell him exactly what he dreamed about, and he would always use silence instead of one or two exceptions.

He didn't ask, knowing how much pain was hidden between those drooping eyebrows and tight lips.That was the beginning of Yu Yan's nightmare, the crux of all his anxieties.

Yu Yan slowly stopped moving, his breathing was gentle, and he fell asleep again.Cheng Shen took off his clothes and carried him to take a bath. During the process, Yu Yan woke up once in a daze and didn't resist him anymore.

It was already four o'clock in the morning after all the tossing, Cheng Shen held Yu Yan in his arms again, and patted him lightly on the back.He doesn't know when Yu Yan will recover, and he doesn't know how long it will take him to forget, maybe he will never forget, but it doesn't matter, he will be with him for the rest of his life.

·

The next morning, Yu Yan seemed to have completely forgotten what happened last night, and he leaned lazily on the side of the bed to watch Cheng Shen change his clothes.

Cheng Shen took off his pajamas, his shoulders and arms were tightly muscled and beautifully stretched into sexy lines with his movements.

Seeing a long scratch on his back, Yu Yan rarely felt teased: "Did I scratch that?"

Cheng Shen couldn't see it, but he did feel a slight tingling: "Well, the bad cat scratched it."

Yu Yan threw off the quilt and got out of bed, walked over barefoot to get close to Cheng Shen, and hugged him from behind.

Cheng Shen's T-shirt had just been put on his head, and he stopped: "What are you doing? You still want to eat my tofu!"

"Tch, what do you have to eat." Yu Yan said to him, as if he said to himself: "For so many years, I have eaten enough, it's not rare."

Cheng Shen put on his clothes, turned around and pinched Yu Yan's nose: "You're tired of me, aren't you? It's too late!"

Yu Yan shrugged and slipped back to the bed to lean on.

Cheng Shenda was disgusted early in the morning and was about to find something to do for Yu Yan: "I agreed to go to Venice for the annual vacation, and it won't be long. You can start watching the guide when you are free at home. Don't be like before, Count on me for everything, and end up sitting in KFC playing games bored."

Yu Yan didn't know what he was thinking after listening, and stared blankly at the end of the bed.

Cheng Shen called him, "Did you hear that?"

Yu Yan turned his face away, and suddenly asked nonchalantly, "Do you want to go on honeymoon?"

Cheng Shen smiled: "With you? We can't talk about the certificate. The honeymoon is for the newlywed Yan Erdu. We can only call it tourism."

Yu Yan seemed to have been poked in the temple by a needle, and frowned slightly.In the future, Cheng Shen will have a beautiful wife by his side, who can go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to obtain a certificate, and can go to the Public Security Bureau to register for household registration. That's what they call a honeymoon.

Yu Yan bit the tip of his tongue, angry at his jealousy and unwillingness.

·

Yu Yan actually wanted to see Cheng Shen's marriage with his own eyes, from stepping into the auditorium, to the oath testimony, to the exchange of rings.

He will definitely not kneel on one knee at the scene, that is the posture only used for marriage proposals.

Yu Yan didn't know if Cheng Shen had proposed to Qin Yun, but he didn't see it, so let's pretend he didn't.So Cheng Shen should be the first person to propose marriage in his life, even though he was disgusted and denied that it was not a marriage proposal.

Cheng Shen, who was the groom's officer, must be very handsome, more handsome than any other Cheng Shen he had ever seen, so handsome that he could instantly kill all the male guests present.But he may not be able to mess with his own father, after all, Jiang is still old and hot, Cheng Shen probably needs more than ten years of hard work if he wants to become a choking pepper.

When he was on the forums, he had seen many gay posts. The road was too difficult, and very few of them persisted until the end. Many people chose to marry women due to social pressure.Yu Yan read a sharing, probably the content was that after the two parties broke up, one party went to be the best man at the other party's wedding.When the other party asked "Will you marry me", he stood behind the groom and burst into tears, and then while the bride answered with the microphone, he said "I do" by covering up and aboveboard.

Yu Yan can also be Cheng Shen's best man, and he can laugh with him all day, help him pick up the bride, hold the wine, and say "I do" softly behind his back.But Cheng Shen didn't give him this chance, Cheng Shen refused to let him go, so cruelly made him a shameful joke.

So Yu Yan didn't let him succeed.

In the next few days, they had to have sex almost every night, and it was Yu Yan's own request.

Of course Cheng Shen didn't have any objections, but he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to take it anymore, and he was a little flustered, Yu Yan looked a little bit desperate, he went crazy on the bed as if he had taken drugs, he was a completely different person from before.

On the eve of New Year's Eve, Yu Yan cried with excitement, his face flushed with tears, like the rain hitting a rose, wild and turbulent, and very pitiful.

They hugged and slept that night, and later Yu Yan asked Cheng Shen to turn over and hug him from behind.

Cheng Shen asked why he slept like this.

Yu Yan replied: "You always hug me like this, I also want to try how it feels."

"What do you feel?"

Yu Yan said: "You are too big!"

Cheng Shen laughed twice and soon fell asleep.

Yu Yan groped in the dark with his eyes closed, Cheng Shen's collarbone, shoulders, chest, lower abdomen, hip bones, thighs, and his smell, all of which he had to remember.

He will take 27-year-old Cheng Shen with him to hell.

When the twelve o'clock bell rang, Yu Yan said softly, "Happy New Year."

Then he let go of his arms and turned around to hug himself.

·

At the beginning of the new year, Cheng Shen was woken up by the alarm clock on time.

He turned over to hug Yuyan, and said in a rustling voice, "Good morning baby, happy new year."

Yu Yan opened a pair of clear eyes: "Good morning."

They got up and washed together, brushed their teeth in front of the mirror, and threatened to fling toothpaste on each other's faces.

Yu Yan saw the razor on the table and suggested, "I want to shave for you."

Cheng Shen remembered Yu Yan's handiwork, he once gave him a big cut, and before he could groan, he was scared to death.

Cheng Shen had lingering fears: "Are you trying to take revenge on me?"

Yu Yan felt that he was a villain, at least today Cheng Shen was going to attend the engagement banquet as a groom-to-be, how could he make a mistake in such a trivial matter.

Bringing the shaving foam, Yu Yan rubbed the white foam around Cheng Shen's chin in a circular motion, then held the razor tightly and shave gently.

It is sometimes difficult for him to concentrate after taking the medicine, but now he is serious and serious, treating Cheng Shen's beard as a flower and plant that needs careful care, and taking care of him meticulously.

It was done in a few minutes, and Cheng Shen nodded in satisfaction. In exchange, he would also shave Yu Yan.

Yu Yan didn't like to use a razor, so he handed over the electric one to him, and let him use it with all his might.

Cheng Shen rarely sprayed styling gel on his hair today, and the broken hair that he usually scratched at random was brushed back and combed wildly, making him even more damn handsome.

This man is still smug, he picked the most expensive suit in the closet, but he is holding the tie that Yu Yan gave him in his hand.

To be honest, this tie is quite expensive, but compared with Cheng Shen's outfit, it's too shabby.

Yu Yan couldn't quite understand Cheng Shen's psychology of taking the tie he gave him to get engaged to another woman, but he didn't refuse, and tied a super beautiful knot for Cheng Shen.

When the bow tie was pushed to the neckline, Yu Yan stood on tiptoe slightly, and he sincerely said to Cheng Shen, "Congratulations in advance."

Cheng Shen put on a cashmere coat, bent one finger slightly to lift Yu Yan's chin, and the refreshing taste of mouthwash was sent between his lips and teeth. He put Yu Yan's lower lip in his mouth, kissed him like licking honey, and said, "Thank you." ,wait me back."

Cheng Shen went out like every morning in the past, he knew that no matter how far he went, Yu Yan would definitely wait for him.

As soon as the door was closed, Yu Yan also started to clean himself up.

He left Shengyan Technology for more than two years, and he hasn't worn a formal suit for a long time. The suit in the closet was brought by Cheng Shen by mistake.

After Yu Yan changed, his shirt was loose and his suit was loose. He couldn't support this suit anymore, it looked a little funny.But he didn't care, and borrowed a deep tie from the drawer.

If Cheng Shen took him as a gift, then there is nothing wrong with him taking Cheng Shen.

Then he put on a long black down jacket. He is not as frost-resistant as Cheng Shen. The winter in Beicheng is too cold. Yu Yan realized this in the first year he went to the north, but he never thought of leaving at that time.

After tidying up, Yu Yan rubbed his face in the mirror. He looked very sick, his face was pale, his eyes were black and blue, and he was skinny. He looked unhealthy, as if he might die at any time.

Yu Yan seemed to understand Cheng Shen's desire to keep a backup.

But there is no way, his body is already like this, and it will not get better at all.Yu Yan misses his sister a little bit, if Yu Wen can borrow some makeup from her here, so that he doesn't look so bad.

Yu Yan doesn't want to think about it anymore, he has been getting into the corner more and more recently, and often gets stuck in a thought for a long time and can't get out.

He took the car keys and went out without any cover on his face. Now that things are not bad, he is not afraid of anything.

When the car drove out of the underground garage, Yu Yan caught a ray of sunlight, and the light hit his eyes impartially, casting a layer of gold on his eyes, which made him more human and angry.

The news about the venue of the banquet has been announced long ago. It is at the Huating Hotel in Financial Street, one of the most upscale hotels in North City, which shows how much Cheng Shen attaches importance to Qin Yun.

Three or ten minutes later, Yu Yan arrived downstairs at the hotel.He sat in the car, raised his eyelids and looked up.Cheng Shen didn't invite him to the engagement ceremony, but he came uninvited, looking a bit cheeky.

The names of Cheng Shen and Qin Yun floated continuously on the LED electronic scrolling screen at the entrance of the hotel, and there was a stand in human form at the entrance, just like the photo in the newspaper, I couldn't get tired of using it over and over again.

Yu Yan curled his lips, feeling that high-end hotels are just like that, so earthy.

At the gate of Huating, cars are only allowed to temporarily park for 5 minutes, so Yu Yan didn't get out of the car, he stared intently at the constantly beating characters, and drove away when the time was up.

He also couldn't understand his own behavior, since he didn't plan to go up, he came here to do something, dressed so formally, it seemed that Cheng Shen really planned to ask him to be the best man.

But no matter what, Cheng Shen didn't have this chance now.

Yu Yan went home again, changed his suit and put it in the closet, and wore a white sweater, which was the couple outfit that Cheng Shen bought back then, Yu Yan felt nostalgic.

He pulled out his chair and sat down. The desk was facing the window. Cheng Shen worked at his desk here every day. When he looked up, he could see a row of plum trees.

Yu Yan wondered why it hadn't snowed yet.

He sighed, spread out the notebook, and wrote a line of words with a few strokes of the pen.He planned to leave this notebook to Cheng Shen as a memory for future memories.

After finishing writing, Yu Yan put his hands on his chin and looked at the scenery for a long time, as if he had never seen it before, but there was no nostalgia in his eyes.

He sat for a long time, smoking a whole pack of cigarettes.Looking at the time, it was ten o'clock in the morning, and the ceremony should have started.

So he turned into the kitchen, found a goblet, and opened a bottle of red wine very emotionally.

This is Cheng Shen's treasure, and I don't know if he will be angry when he finds out, but it doesn't matter, at that time, he couldn't find anyone if he wanted to get angry.

Yu Yan shook the wine glass, leaned against the floor-to-ceiling windows of the living room and toasted to the air, he felt that he should say something, after thinking for a long time, he muttered: "Don't be afraid when you come back."

Anyway, Yu Yan felt that if it was him instead, he would be terrified to death, and he probably would leave a psychological shadow in the future.

He drank half a bottle, and finally his face turned red after drinking.Satisfied now, Yu Yan returned to the bedroom with the soles of his feet fluttering, opened the drawer of the bedside table and took out two medicine bottles.

There is a limit on the quantity of medicines that doctors can prescribe.But Fang Kaifeng made a miscalculation, and only took two slices of Anding Yuyan prescribed for the first time, plus the newly prescribed one later, it was simply too much.

Yu Yan swallowed one Valium with half a glass of red wine, then swallowed another, one after another, finally got impatient, poured it directly into his mouth, chewed it, chewed it, swallowed it, finally subsided.

He slowly lay on the bed, the hour hand pointed to eleven o'clock, he didn't know where the party was going, but it had nothing to do with him.

He felt sleepy and wanted to sleep, but the corners of his mouth were hooked.

Because of the pain, torment, ferocity, sudden loss of control and madness, the jealousy and resentment that filled his heart, all had nothing to do with him.

After today, he can separate from Cheng Shen and pursue their own lives.

They bridge to bridge, road to road, and no one is in the way.

Recalling the memory, through the hazy shadows, Yu Yan saw the boy who was sweating on the basketball court in a trance.

How nice it would be to stop at that time.

But that's okay, they're all free now.

He was finally free.