Don't you say I'm a substitute

37.

"What did you say?!" Lu Haoze asked word by word.

"I mean, you like me, what does it have to do with me?" Zheng Zaochun patted the corner of his clothes, where there was a small piece of dirt, which he didn't notice when he washed his hands and dusted it off.

"No, me, you, how can this have nothing to do with you? The person I like is you..." Lu Haoze felt that his mind was tied up.

"But I don't like you anymore." As soon as these words were uttered, both Zheng Zaochun and Lu Haoze were stunned for a moment.

But, I don't like you anymore.Lu Haoze split the ten short words into three parts and automatically completed the previous sentence.

Although, I used to like you.

Lu Haoze chewed these words over and over again, unable to let go of them for a long time.Zheng Zaochun liked him, he had felt it a long time ago, his tone of voice when he talked to him and the way he looked at him put his heart on the bright side.It's a pity that he felt as if he had been lowered at that time, and he was sure that his appearance was for his money, so if he didn't tell him, he didn't know, and when he wanted to get back that feeling, Zheng Zaochun Haven't spoken to him for a long time.

If Lu Haoze remembers correctly, this is the first time Zheng Zaochun admitted that he likes him, but what's the use of it?Lu Haoze stared at Zheng Zaochun's face and the neither sad nor happy expression on that face, feeling mixed emotions in his heart.

Zheng Zaochun, after finishing the sentence just now, was carefully feeling the reaction in his body.The expected suffocating despair did not appear, and his heart was still calm, he quietly let out a sigh of relief.Originally, when he saw Lu Haoze, he was worried that there was no medicine for him here, and he didn't want to have a relapse in front of him.It seems that his illness is really cured, he no longer has to feel guilty towards Huahua and the others for concealing his illness, and he can get along well with the children in the future. Zheng Zaochun, who realized this, was very relieved, He lowered his head and smiled quickly, then looked at Lu Haoze again.

"Early spring, I admit that I got close to you because you looked a bit like Wei Yu, but not anymore. Later, I really like you. I like to see you chatting with Aunt Zhou and the others, and I like your smile. , I like to watch you draw, you are so good, I didn't use you as a substitute, you believe me, I really like you!"

"I was really wrong, all of this is my fault, it's all my fault, you can beat me or scold me, no matter how you punish me, but why do you punish yourself for my mistakes in early spring ?! The living conditions here are so bad, why would you want to come here? Look at you, you are almost out of shape, you have suffered a lot in the past few months! I feel distressed when I see it... I heard from the village head before I came The children like you very much, the new teacher, Zaochun, you actually like children very much..." Lu Haoze slowly took out the picture book from the bag at hand and held it in his hand, "After you leave, I will Only after reading the picture book you left for Aunt Zhou did I realize how much you love our children..."

"Ah!" Zheng Zaochun stood up from the stool after seeing clearly what was in Lu Haoze's hand, and screamed as if seeing something terrible.

Seeing that Zheng Zaochun's calm expression finally showed a flaw, Lu Haoze felt hopeful in his heart. He took a few steps on his knees and wanted to hug Zheng Zaochun's leg, but as soon as he moved forward, Zheng Zaochun frowned and backed away.

"Zaochun... don't you miss the children? They miss you, they always ask me when you'll be home..." Lu Haoze opened the drawing book and held it up in front of Zheng Zaochun.

Seeing the three children on the drawing paper, Qiuqiu's agility, the elder brother's calmness, and the younger brother's mischievousness, the appearance of the children that was about to start to blur in my mind quickly became clear at this moment.It was as if a tsunami had been triggered in his heart, and the memories that had been deliberately dusted in the corner swept over with heart-piercing pain. Zheng Zaochun pointed at the painting, and his whole body began to tremble violently.

"Zaochun..." Sensing Zheng Zaochun's change, Lu Haoze hurried forward.

"Don't come here!" Zheng Zaochun suddenly yelled.

"Zaochun, what's wrong with you?!" Lu Haoze's soul trembled from being yelled at, and he realized that it was the painting in his hand that stimulated Zheng Zaochun.

"Don't come here! You go! You go! Go!" Zheng Zaochun yelled, turned around and ran into the house.

Zheng Zaochun's hysterical appearance frightened Lu Haoze. He got up from the ground and wanted to chase after him, but after kneeling on the ground for a long time, his legs were numb when he stood up suddenly. Lu Haoze fell hard after taking a step. on the ground.

Getting up from the ground with difficulty, Lu Haoze limped and rushed to the door of the wooden house and knocked.

"Zaochun, Zaochun, you open the door, don't get excited, I'll go, I'll go right away, don't get excited, calm down, calm down, don't get excited..." Lu Haoze's heart hung in his throat, he was afraid that Zheng Zaochun would get excited will do stupid things.

Zheng Zaochun leaned against the door and squatted on the ground with his head in his hands.

"He doesn't care about you, and he doesn't care about the child..."

"He won't let you get close to the child..."

"He used you as a substitute..."

"You are different from your classmates at school, you are a monster who can give birth to children..."

"Do you dare to let them know that you have given birth to a child..."

"They are nice to you just want to hug you..."

"If you let them know that you have depression, they will hate you even more..."

"No one understands you..."

"No one cares about you..."

"No one cares about you..."

"No one can save you..."

"No!" Zheng Zaochun waved his hands in the air, struggling desperately to dispel these voices that kept echoing in his ears, but no matter what he did, it was of no avail.My head hurts like it's about to split open, and the picture I see in front of me begins to distort.

"No! I'm not a monster! I'm not sick!" Zheng Zaochun slammed the back of his head against the door like a beast, making a loud noise.

"Zaochun, open the door! Don't scare me! Please! Open the door!" Lu Haoze couldn't see the situation inside the door, and the loud noise was like a hammer hitting his heart.

"I'm not...I'm not..." Inside the door, Zheng Zaochun kept banging on the door, but outside the door, hearing the voice, Lu Haoze completely collapsed.

"Zaochun, I beg you, don't do stupid things, I won't force you anymore, I won't force you anymore, please, don't hurt yourself..." The sweat on his head dripped down his neck together with tears. Shouting outside the door made her voice hoarse, but the banging on the door continued one after another.

An hour and a half later, Lu Haoze knelt and sat outside the door. Zheng Zaochun was not in good condition, and he didn't dare to leave rashly. There was a window on the left side of the door that was half open. Zheng Zaochun would be irritated again when he saw him flipping through the window, Lu Haoze could only lean on the door and pay attention to the movement inside in a dilemma.Hearing that the voice inside the door became softer and the frequency of head banging on the door became lower and lower, Lu Haoze became more and more nervous.

"Zhouchun...you open the door...I was wrong...I shouldn't come here...I shouldn't force you...you open the door, let's go to the doctor, okay...don't hurt yourself..." Lu Haoze's voice started from the last At the beginning, he was full of energy, but later he became weak and more like muttering to himself.

I don't know how long it took, and after a sound of rustling clothes against the door, the banging on the door stopped completely.

"Early spring? Early spring?" Lu Haoze called twice, but the room remained silent.Through the crack of the door, he saw Zheng Zaochun lying motionless by the door.

"Early spring!" Lu Haoze was so frightened that he was scared out of his wits, rushed under the window and turned inside after a few tries.Throwing over to hug him into his arms, Lu Haoze hastily touched his forehead, sniffed, and heaved a sigh of relief when he found that he seemed to have just passed out.But although it looked fine on the outside, Lu Haoze still couldn't feel at ease, and firmly fixed him in his arms, he opened the door and walked out.

Tian Cong and Jin Jiajun waited in the village committee from the sun until the sun was setting. Lu Haoze, who had agreed to meet Zheng Zaochun alone, hadn't come back yet.Just when the two of them were discussing whether to go to the school to see, Lu Haoze rushed over with him in his arms.

The embarrassed look of the two people in front of them was really unexpected.Lu Haoze's body was covered in dust and mud, his leg was broken somewhere, and a small column of blood flowed down his calf to his ankle.His face was even harder to see, his forehead was dusty and sweaty, his eyes were red and swollen, his cheeks were streaked with tears, and his lips were chapped and oozing blood.And Zheng Zaochun lay in Lu Haoze's personnel ignorance, Tian Cong and Jin Jiajun looked at each other, what happened to these two people?

"Hey! What's the matter?!" The village chief was taken aback by this gesture. When he hooted, the villagers who had been peeking in at the gate of the village committee all surrounded him in the blink of an eye.

"Village chief, is there a health center in the village? Zheng Zaochun passed out." Lu Haoze's hoarse voice sounded as uncomfortable as sawing wood with a blunt knife in everyone's ears.

"Yes, yes, come with me, oh, what are you looking at, everyone go back, go back!" The village chief led the people out while leading a way, Tian Cong and Jin Jiajun followed behind.

When he arrived at the health center, Lu Haoze was completely dumbfounded. An old doctor who was estimated to be 80 or [-] years old stood in front of the only hospital bed in the room and squinted at him.

"Village chief, this..." Lu Haoze didn't know how to describe his feelings.

"Hey, this is the only doctor in Zhangwan. Does Mr. Zheng's condition matter? How about I find someone to take you out of the mountain?"

Lu Haoze looked at Zheng Zaochun in his arms and the sky outside.

"it is good."

"Don't follow, just find a place to rest, I'll take him to the town to find a doctor." Lu Haoze walked up to Tian Cong and the others and said.

"But..." Tian Cong was about to say something when Jin Jiajun interrupted him.

"Go ahead, be careful on the road." Jin Jiajun said with a serious face.

"Ah."

With their help, Lu Haoze carried Zheng Zaochun on his back, wrapped him in a sheet, tied the knot on his chest tightly, and followed the villagers leading the way.

"Uncle, why did you let him go? It's going to be dark soon, and the mountains are so dangerous!" Tian Cong yelled after Jin Jiajun.

"Didn't you see that Zheng Zaochun is in a bad state?"

"But they can observe and observe here at night, and wait until dawn tomorrow! It's safer than climbing the mountain at night!"

"Maybe you're right. Maybe Zheng Zaochun just fell asleep and there's nothing wrong with him, but he's afraid. If Zheng Zaochun makes a mistake, he will never forgive himself in his life." Jin Jiajun looked at the two little ones at the entrance of the village. Light spot, I hope they have a safe journey.

Tian Cong was silent for a long time after hearing this.

The next day, Jin Jiajun didn't know that Lu Haoze and the others were already in the county until he received a call from Lu Haoze.It turned out that after arriving in Tonghua Town last night, it was not just the wind or something else, Zheng Zaochun suddenly developed a high fever, Lu Haoze was worried that there was something wrong with his brain, so he begged a local to drive a bungee to the county overnight.

It was already past two o'clock in the morning when we arrived at the county seat. Fortunately, the medical conditions in the county hospital were much better than those at the bottom. As soon as Zheng Zaochun went there, he had an emergency head CT scan. The diagnosis was mild malnutrition and fatigue, and the doctor prescribed nutritional support for three days.Lu Haoze was worried, and told the doctor about Zheng Zaochun's illness in detail.

"From your description, I can only judge that the patient may have hyperventilated breathing under emotional agitation. As for the problem of depression, you can wait for the psychological doctor to go to work tomorrow before consulting in detail." The doctor snapped He closed the medical record folder and said.

"Oh okay, doctor, you don't know, I'm really afraid that he won't be able to wake up like before." Lu Haoze said.

"Don't worry too much. There is nothing abnormal in the CT results. He will wake up naturally when he sleeps well. He won't sleep for a long time like you said. But you, I'll make an order for you to go Let’s take a picture, didn’t you notice that your feet are so swollen?” Woke up from the bed to see a doctor, the doctor stumbled and saw a limping man with bloody arms and legs, and thought he was The patient, it turned out that the person in this man's arms came to see the doctor after a long time.

"Oh, I was in such a hurry, I didn't feel it." Lu Haoze looked down, and saw that his right ankle was really swollen, and when he tried hard, he really felt a heart-rending pain.

"It's all like this, don't you feel any pain?" Half an hour later, the doctor asked in amazement while holding Lu Haoze's X-ray.

"I didn't feel it before I came here, but now I feel a little pain." Lu Haoze replied honestly.

"It hurts a little?! Are you kidding me?! This is a fracture, brother! Look, it's almost dislocated! You need to reset it and fix it quickly. The one on your knee should also be dealt with quickly!" The doctor saw that Lu Haoze wanted to stand up, and shook his head. Pushed him back into the chair.

"Okay, can you fix it in the ward, my...brother is in the ward, I have been out for a long time." It turned out to be a broken bone.As early as the time when Zheng Zaochun fell to the ground in the small courtyard, he felt a burning pain in his leg, but at that time he put all his thoughts on Zheng Zaochun and didn't care.Later, when I went out of the mountain in the dark, I stumbled and slipped several times and nearly fell Zheng Zaochun to the ground. It was probably at that time that I broke a bone.

"Oh my god, you can calm down, your brother is fine, I think something is going to happen to you!" Although the doctor said so, he still helped him move back to Zheng Zaochun's ward step by step.

"I'm going to reset your technique, bear with it, don't cry about the pain." The doctor said while grabbing Lu Haoze's calf with one hand and his foot with the other.

"Hush...he's still sleeping, doctor, please keep your voice down." Lu Haoze gestured to the doctor with his lips.

The doctor rolled his eyes in his heart, but he was doing the reset carefully in his hands.

"Okay, don't move around, don't walk on the ground, ring the bell to call me." Ten minutes later, Lu Haoze's right foot was tightly wrapped in plaster.

"Can Xie help me push the bed next to my brother, I want to lie next to him."

The doctor saw that the cold sweat from the pain just now had not fallen on the man's face, so he made a noise to go to touch his younger brother.This is a brother who loves my brother so much...

After spending a long time trying to put the two beds together, as soon as Lu Haoze got close to Zheng Zaochun, he couldn't wait to grab Zheng Zaochun's hand.

"Thank you, doctor." Lu Haoze thanked him sincerely.

"You're welcome, the wounds on other parts of your body will be cleaned up by a nurse in a while, so take a good rest."

"it is good."

The author has something to say:

Happy Friday!Hold on, it's the weekend~~~

I haven’t written in these two days but I’ve been thinking about it. I decided to follow my own ideas to improve the plot and ending (the author’s unscrupulous confession that has been completely released)

Thank you for your comments and encouragement, my heart is warm~