Tang riddles

Zhang Ruohan would sometimes pick up a pen, wanting to write down her current mood on paper.But every time this happens, the final ending is just to sigh without saying a word.There are too many and too complicated words in her heart, and thousands of stuffy thoughts are formed, and she doesn't know where to start.

After 12 years of waiting, there is still no result. In a trance, she even forgot her age, herself, and why she had to wait.Copying and chanting scriptures every day, meditating, reading quietly at night, playing the piano occasionally, without making tunes.After eating vegetarian food for more than ten years, I have forgotten the taste of meat; the thin soup is like water, and I can't taste the shallowness of the taste.The days are flat, repeated and reincarnated, and every day feels like a lifetime.

It was a day when the autumn colors were getting thicker, she went to the kindness to worship the Buddha, and saw a poem on the poem inscription board hung densely in the Big Wild Goose Pagoda, and she was suddenly stunned.She stopped for a long time and read repeatedly:

Sauvignon Blanc in Chang'an.

Luowei crows at the golden well fence in autumn, the slight frost is sad and the color is cold.

The solitary lamp was lost in thought, rolled up the curtain and looked at the moon and sky, and sighed, and the beauty was like a flower separated from the clouds.

There is a long sky of Qingming above, and there are waves of Lushui below.

The long road is far away and the soul flies bitterly, but the soul of dreams is less than the Guanshan disaster.

Long lovesickness destroys the heart and liver.

The sun is shining / the flowers contain smoke when you want to be exhausted, and the moon is bright and you can't sleep without worry.

Zhao Sechu stopped the Phoenix Column, and the Shuqin wanted to play the mandarin duck strings.

This song is intended to be passed on by no one, and I would like to send it to Yan Ran with the spring breeze.

Yijun is far away across the blue sky. In the past, Hengbomu was now a fountain of tears.

If you don't believe me, my concubine will be heartbroken, and I will come back to see the mirror.

The beauty is full of flowers when she is there, and she spends the rest of the bed when she goes.

The embroidered quilt in the bed does not sleep, and it has been three years since I smell the lingering fragrance.

The fragrance will not die, and people will not come.

Acacia yellow leaves fall, white dew wet moss.

The signer was Li Bai. Even Zhang Ruohan, who hadn't asked about world affairs for several years, knew the name of Taibai Jiuxian.This "Long Lovesickness" comes from his pen.

Really good writing, Zhang Ruohan sighed.After looking at it for a long time, she asked the monks in the temple for pen, ink and paper, and copied it down.It's not that she is afraid of forgetting, in fact, she remembered this poem after reading it once.I copied it down, but I wanted to fulfill my wish.As a result of her wish to express her feelings, her pen can't write her worries, so she can only use the poet's wonderful pen to talk about her thoughts.

After finishing writing, she threw the paper into the censer of Mercy, and watched the ink words being swallowed by the orange-red flame, her eyes were astringent, and she blinked, as if she was in tears.

I have been in and out of Buddhist temples for ten years, but today I was smelled of incense.She slowly closed her eyes, turned around for a while, and left with Wu Ya.

This year, Zhang Ruohan was twenty-three years old.Since she was 15 years old, all her experiences in the past eight years have been lackluster and miserable.The only happy event worth mentioning was her marriage, which was more a farce than a happy event.In the past eight years, there has been an endless stream of proposers in the Zhang Mansion, and nine out of ten of them return disappointed.The remaining one or two are ignorant people that are rare in that world.Although these people annoyed her, they also added a bit of flavor to the peaceful, indifferent and even dead life of the Zhang family.The people in Zhang's house probably thought the same as her.

Up to now, only two or three people are still persisting.It can't be said that she is not persistent and tenacious, but it makes her admire.

However, it is just admiration, she is a person who has left the world, unless the person who can bring her back to the world returns, she will escape the world far away and never marry for life.This is also a fact that her relatives have already accepted.Zhang Ruohan is indeed not suitable for marrying anyone, and many people, after seeing Zhang Ruohan's determination, also understand that marrying such a woman home will be difficult for them.

The master continued her journey of traveling around the world as soon as she was in good health and entered Buddhism.It has been five years since she left Chang'an, and she only came back once halfway, that is, when her mother passed away more than half a year ago.

Mother Tan, after all, was unable to withstand the torment of illness. She was weak, and when Zhang Ruohan came out of the womb, she was also congenitally deficient.After giving birth to Zhang Ruohan, Tan's body has left the root cause of the disease, and it hasn't recovered after all these years of raising her.After Zhang Ruohan's accident, his health deteriorated even more because of his inner depression.After several years of procrastination, I finally got sick.For the whole year of last year, Zhang Ruohan, in addition to the pure life of a Buddhist layman, stayed in front of his mother's bed to fulfill his filial piety, and took care of his mother's daily life with his own hands.From her mother's illness, to being diagnosed as incurable, to holding her mother's hand and sending her away, Zhang Ruohan was very calm throughout the process.She did not cry, nor did she show the slightest sadness.It's not that she's not sad, on the contrary, she can no longer express too strong emotions, all her emotions are not like ordinary people, but go inward, the more sad, the calmer she looks on the surface.

After my mother passed away, the family held a funeral, and the master hurried back and performed the ritual ceremony for my mother.After that, Zhang Ruohan wore mourning for half a year and lived in a hut in Zhang's cemetery, guarding her mother's tomb.Recently, he was forcibly picked up by his father and brought back home.Zhang Ruohan didn't resist, looking at her father's graying beard and his aging face, she couldn't bear it.

That autumn, Zhang Ruohan lost her mother.At the end of the twelfth lunar month of winter, the case of the empress who hated winning the witchcraft broke out, and the whole court was shocked, and the nobles in Beijing were in danger.In the spring and March of the following year, the queen died of claustrophobia.Seven days later, Li Jinyue, who was far away in the Anbei Protectorate's Mansion, returned to Chang'an after ten years.The poor princess of Jin State failed to see her mother for the last time.As soon as he came back, he was imprisoned by his father in the princess mansion, unable to get out even a single step.Not long after, news broke that she was seriously ill with depression.

Zhang Ruohan sometimes wonders whether she and Li Jinyue lost their mothers one after another, whether it is their fate.But she changed her mind and thought again, what sins the two of them committed in the previous life, in exchange for such a fate in this life.

That's right, isn't she and Li Jinyue having a bad relationship?If it wasn't for Chi Shi's return later and Li Jinyue let go, she and Li Jinyue would have been entangled like this for an unknown period of time. This knot will become more and more deadly, and one day, it will bring irreparable consequences between them.

And how she planted that cause by herself in the first place, she really didn't know.When she realized it, a flower of evil had already bloomed, spreading wantonly and entangled between the two of them.

She still remembered that at that time, she heard the sad news of the queen's death, and also learned that Li Jinyue was under house arrest in the princess mansion after her return.She was anxious and worried about the safety of her former friends, so she resolutely went to the princess mansion regardless of her father's objection.Although Li Jinyue couldn't go out, the guards of the Princess Mansion didn't stop people from outside from entering.Zhang Ruohan was let in by the forbidden army because of his friendship with the princess in the past.

When she stepped into Li Jinyue's bedroom, she saw Li Jinyue lying drunk beside the bed.There were pots and pans all over her, and the smell of alcohol was overwhelming in the room. She leaned against the edge of the bed with her head tilted, sleeping like a child.The tears hanging down his face were distressing.

Zhang Ruohan sighed deeply, and went to clean the house for her.The wine jar was moved out, she changed Li Jinyue's outer shirt with her own hands, wiped her face with a warm handkerchief, helped her onto the bed, and covered her with a quilt.

Then she lit the Ningshen incense and stood by her side.Until Li Jinyue woke up, Zhang Ruohan fell asleep beside her couch at some point.A warm hand was stroking her cheek, waking up the sleeping Zhang Ruohan.

Zhang Ruohan raised her head in confusion, looked at the owner of the hand, and bumped into the beautiful phoenix eyes of Li Jinyue, who was full of tenderness and fascination.I haven't seen her for several years, Li Jinyue's figure has grown taller, and her face has become tough due to the wind and sand in the frontier, but the fragility revealed at this moment is in sharp contrast to that toughness.Zhang Ruohan's heart trembled slightly, and she actually felt that she was so transparent and fragile like glass that people wanted to protect her.

But the hand covering her face caused some subtle embarrassment in her heart.She dodged without a trace, stood up, the bewildered expression on her face was replaced by a calm expression, she asked softly:

"Are you okay?" There was concern in his tone, "You drank too much wine, I'll pour you a cup of strong tea." He got up and went to the tea table to pour tea.

Li Jinyue didn't answer, and when Zhang Ruohan came back holding the tea, she found that she was staring at him intently.

That subtle embarrassment hit Zhang Ruohan's heart again.She pretended not to care, and handed the tea to Li Jinyue.

When Li Jinyue took the tea, she held Zhang Ruohan's hand together, and then let go after a while.Zhang Ruohan retracted his hands into his sleeves uncomfortably.

At this time, Li Jinyue spoke, her voice was still hoarse after a hangover:

"Lotus maid, long time no see."

"Well, it's been more than ten years." Zhang Ruohan replied softly.

"How are you doing?" Li Jinyue asked.

Zhang Ruohan just smiled, this question is actually meaningless.

"You are still waiting for her." Li Jinyue said.

Zhang Ruohan nodded silently.

Li Jinyue opened her mouth, but stopped talking.Zhang Ruohan found that the strange light in her eyes was much weaker.After a while, she put on a playful face and said:

"Back then, I... and her, I guessed that you would be beautiful when you grow up. However, when we meet again today, you are more beautiful than I imagined. I don't know how she will feel when she sees you again."

Zhang Ruohan nodded and smiled lightly.She doesn't really care how good her skin looks.Unless, the person she loves can come back to appreciate it.

"Thank you for coming to see me." Li Jinyue said.

"Thank you, we are the only ones left after the sixth meeting. How can I not come to see you, then I am too ruthless." Zhang Ruohan said, she looked at Li Jinyue, and said, "You have to be good, I don't want to Six days later, I will be the only one left in the future.”

"I understand." Li Jinyue replied with a wry smile, she looked at Zhang Ruohan expectantly, "Will you...will come tomorrow?"

"Until you're all right, I'll come every day." Zhang Ruohan said.

"What about after that?"

Zhang Ruohan looked at her dumbfounded.Li Jinyue lowered her head, a little afraid to look at her.

"You rest well, I'll come back tomorrow."

When Zhang Ruohan stepped out of the princess mansion that day, he had a premonition of what would happen next.She kept her promise and would visit and accompany Li Jinyue every day until Li Jinyue was fully recovered.And Li Jinyue, as she expected, began to lose control of her emotions.Zhang Ruohan understood that she had just lost her mother, had been widowed for many years, and was imprisoned by her father after she came back. She was too lonely without anyone around her.She tried her best to persuade herself to be tolerant to her, and also tried her best to maintain the proper distance between them.But Li Jinyue's love came so fiercely and violently that from the initial restraint, she began to become unscrupulous.She was drunk every day, and she would try to hold her hand, hug Zhang Ruohan, cry in her arms, wrap around her arms, and tease her repeatedly with words.Zhang Ruohan was restrained and restrained, never said a word of complaint, tried to express her attitude with her body, and did not do anything with Li Jinyue beyond the relationship of friendship.

However, she was not as strong as Li Jinyue after all, until Li Jinyue tried to kiss her, Zhang Ruohan finally pushed her away bluntly.She looked at her, not angry, but told Li Jinyue her thoughts very seriously and seriously.She said that her whole life will be spent waiting for that person to return. Before she returns, she does not belong to anyone. After she returns, she will belong to her forever and will not have any emotional ties with anyone.She said: "Mamao, we are best friends for a lifetime, I hope you can cherish our friendship. If you insist on destroying it, I will not and have no way to restore it."

Her resolute attitude undoubtedly made Li Jinyue's heart full of trauma worse, and the relationship between the two of them was full of troubles because of rumors from Li Jinyue's servants.She finally stopped visiting Li Jinyue, and after pushing Li Jinyue away that time, she never saw her again.Li Jinyue came to her door many times without shyness, but was blocked by her family members.After that, she began to send gifts to Zhang's mansion uninterruptedly, all kinds of gifts were sent by herself.

Zhang Jiuling was worried, and every time he went to court, he wanted to talk to the saint about it, but he couldn't speak.However, the saint is not deaf and blind, so he naturally knows what absurd things his daughter has done.He was very angry and felt very ashamed, so he kicked Li Jinyue to Anbei again with a transfer order.Out of sight, out of mind, he has always treated his eldest daughter like this.

Zhang Ruohan didn't know what it was like in her heart, she felt bitter and helpless, only she could understand it.Was it her that caused her best friend to leave the bitter cold place in the north of the vast expanse again?Or is her only true friend to blame?But didn't she lose another precious friendship?

Maomao, why are you bothering?

This incident strengthened her determination to find Akashi.As she grew older, the shackles of family and marriage became less and less for her, and she was finally free to start looking for Akashi.At the end of the spring of the 15th year of Kaiyuan, she left home and moved into Ci'en Temple for a long time under the pretext of intensively practicing Buddhism.

On the night of the seventh day of the fifth month of that year, she rescued a wandering and helpless Dongying woman, Yuan Qianhe.From then on, Yuan Qianhe became her support in traveling around.Qianhe would often go out to inquire about Akashi's whereabouts for her, but there were so many people, and Akashi was no longer the same Akashi as before. She searched and searched, but there was no news.

In the twelfth lunar month of the 16th year of Kaiyuan, the Ci'en strange ape case broke out, the temple was blocked, and she was trapped in the temple.Since her life was not in danger, nor was she suspected of murder, the family members were not in a hurry to take her out.

On the twenty-sixth day, she felt something in her heart, and went out of the yard to the plum garden, looking up at the snow-falling plum branches, in a daze.Suddenly, she noticed that not far away, there was a person standing still, staring at her intently.When she turned her head, she saw a handsome man in a blue official robe standing under the plum tree with his hands behind his hands, his lacquer-like eyes were full of dark and taboo emotions.

Looking back now, I can't help but feel that it was really a glimpse of ten thousand years, she came back so quietly and without a sound, and pretended to be another person to deceive her for a long time, causing her many heartbreaks and tears.How can this person be so annoying, but she loves her so much.

After 16 years of waiting, the old man finally returns.

The author has something to say: It's snowing