why do you like me

002 go home

The text message reads like this -

"Hi Jiangchuan, my name is Cheng Jing, I just transferred to Xitangkou last year, and I am a sophomore in high school. Aunt Jin told me about your situation, and she asked me to help you with your homework in the future. Considering that making up lessons is not only about improving your test scores, in Before you go back to school, I will first pay attention to your psychological problems. I hope that from now on, you will not easily conflict with others, don’t care too much about other people’s eyes, and close your eyes and take a deep breath when you feel unwell. Aunt Jin will go to Hospital, I’ll go find you and meet and discuss in detail.”

The phone has been out of use for a long time, and when it is turned on again, all the official text messages from China Mobile are received, among which is Cheng Jing's message.Jiang Chuan seemed a bit puzzled at first, but then he heard Jin Min mention Cheng Jing repeatedly along the way, and he gradually found it quite amusing.

Although he said that he was mentally ill to someone he had never met before, Jiang Chuan didn't care about it when he thought that Jin Min liked Cheng Jing so much.Leaving this point aside, Jiang Chuan felt inexplicably that Cheng Jing's tone of introduction had the tone of a conscientious, stern, obedient top student who was on a blind date for the first time.When he saw it suddenly, Jin Min happened to mention Cheng Jing's name, and Jiang Chuan casually asked, "Which Cheng is which Jing? How old is it? Male or female."

After knowing that it was a boy, Jiang Chuan imagined a boy with thick bottle-bottomed glasses with a rigid hairstyle and circles—this kind of caricature made him care less about the impoliteness in that text message.But I didn't expect that Cheng Jing not only didn't have a rigid hairstyle, but also looked so stunning.Especially those eyes, calm and moving, especially moving.Being watched by such eyes, Jiang Chuan only felt that he met a spring water, which was very comfortable.

When he felt comfortable, he was especially prone to profligacy, subconsciously put one calf on the other thigh, leaned his elbows on the table, and looked at Cheng Jing with a smile on his cheek, a mixture of three points of ruffian and seven points of handsomeness, with charming dimples.

Cheng Jing was very calm. She sat down opposite Jiang Chuan and took a sip of water before correcting the other party's misunderstanding: "Psychological problems are not the same as mental illness. You have misunderstood me. You have been out of touch with society for eight months. What needs to be done most now is not tutoring, but to adjust the mental state to normal..."

Jiang Chuan interrupted him: "You still think I'm mentally ill."

Cheng Jing pursed her lips, looked at Jiang Chuan momentarily, and said calmly, "Well, if you feel uncomfortable, you can tell me, I won't treat you as a psychopath."

Jiang Chuan: "..."

Jiang Chuan suddenly felt that this person was really funny.

Most people will be annoyed after their good intentions are misinterpreted, or anxious to explain it again.Cheng Jing did not, but chose to admit the other party's understanding without hesitation, as if being misunderstood was not something that needed to be eagerly proved.

Jiang Chuan didn't understand why Cheng Jing did this for a moment.This person's appearance is too deceptive, such a calm and beautiful face, even when the corners of his lips are pursed, there is no expression, there is a kind of cold porcelain-like delicacy.

Jiang Chuan badly wanted to see the appearance of cracks in the porcelain...was it equally beautiful and delicate.So he said: "I feel quite uncomfortable now, are you a doctor, please give me some advice."

Cheng Jing stared at him, as if judging the authenticity of this sentence, then moved his eyes down, and landed on the leftovers on the table, and said: "You eat too much spicy food, it burns your stomach, and you are angry." a bit big."

He took out a fist-sized plastic box from his schoolbag, and when he opened it, there were three layers, divided into several small compartments, filled with colorful pills.Cheng Jing picked up a tablet, put it on the napkin in front of Jiang Chuan, and said, "Stomach medicine, cools down fire and helps digestion."

Jiang Chuan couldn't help but laugh.

No matter what Cheng Jing said, Jiang Chuan did not believe that he was mentally ill, oh no, it was a psychological problem, to be precise, it was social phobia.Jiang Chuan felt that this was too fucking nonsense, and it would be more plausible to say that he has a tendency to retaliate against society.

Cheng Jing didn't argue with Jiang Chuan either, and when Jiang Chuan was almost done eating, he took out 100 yuan from his wallet and handed it over, saying, "You haven't taken Line 2, the terminal is Xitangkou, you can go back by yourself. "

"Why did you give me 100 yuan to take the subway?"

"Before you sit, you go and buy a traffic card."

"I have."

"Here I am." Cheng Jing took out an old traffic card from his pocket, "Aunt Jin gave it to me when I first arrived at Xitangkou, so let me buy it from you now."

"You have such a beautiful face, you don't even want it." Jiang Chuan raised his eyebrows, "I have words on it."

"I know, your name." Cheng Jing remained expressionless, "I put tape on it, so I can't see it."

Jiang Chuan looked at Cheng Jing, couldn't help but smiled, and couldn't tell what it was like.He has no fetishes, and he will not be stingy enough to care about the ownership of a transportation card. He immediately picked up 100 yuan and a few shopping bags, got up and left the hot pot restaurant.

Cheng Jing made it very clear in the text message that his concern for Jiang Chuan was due to Jin Min's entrustment.Said to discuss in detail, but in the end did not elaborate on any specific content.Jiang Chuan thought he was just stopping by to meet up and had no other intentions.At that time, there were not many people in the shopping mall. After Jiang Chuan left the hot pot restaurant, he hardly met anyone. Wherever he looked, he had no other thoughts except boredom.

It wasn't until he stepped into the subway station that a wave of passengers got off the train, and when the crowds rushed over, he realized that the action he wanted to do subconsciously was only one word——

escape.

Even if the thought is only for a moment.

In most film and television dramas, the exaggerated interpretation of freshmen who walk out of prison and see the light of day again reveals their unreality that is contrary to real life at this moment.A person who has left society and returns to the group will inevitably experience some involuntary fear and anxiety, especially when he came out of that kind of place.

Jiang Chuan found that his fingers were trembling slightly, although he couldn't see it.The scar on his face was also jumping up and down, as if he couldn't bear the hasty glances of passers-by, and wanted to escape from his face, so as to declare that he was a good man with no flaws in his facial features.

In the short time since he came out, after leaving the illusion of security caused by Jin Min, Jiang Chuan really realized that he had "come out" at this moment.

Feeling the panic in every cell of his body, Jiang Chuan had never been so sensitive before. He could even smell the paint smell emanating from the walls of Line 2, which had been in operation for nearly half a year, which made him want to cry.

Of course no tears flowed.

He didn't go to buy a traffic card right away, leaned in front of the subway bulletin board, threw the shopping bag at his feet, tried not to pay attention to the crowd around him, stared at the subway staff not far away and the security inspection machine that was handling luggage, breathing slowly Calm was restored.The smell of paint was not so strong anymore. Jiang Chuan slowly stuffed the soul that had wandered for eight months into his body, and calmly broke out of the cocoon from the panic.

He understood Cheng Jing's purpose.

When Cheng Jing appeared from the entrance of the subway station, Jiang Chuan kept leaning against the wall and looked at him with a half-smile from the corner of his eyes.

The boy still looked expressionless, not indifferent, but calm, his eyes were very focused, and he looked at Jiang Chuan without blinking.It seemed that when he looked at people, he could only see that person in his eyes.After a long time, Jiang Chuan loved the concentration in Cheng Jing's eyes very much, as if there was a thread connecting the two of them through the eyes, and all the irrelevant surroundings were separated.

At this moment, Jiang Chuan just watched Cheng Jing approaching. One of his legs was stretched out straight, and the other was slightly bent.He thought it was very funny: "How do you know so well that I dare not buy a ticket?"

To be precise, it wasn't that he didn't dare—everyone here at Fang Jiangchuan had stabbed him before, and there really wasn't anyone who dared—it was the natural reaction of his body at that moment, and he had an obvious repulsion to contact with strangers.

Jiang Chuan guessed unceremoniously: "Have you ever gone in?"

"Of course not." Cheng Jing glanced not far away, "You didn't feel anything when you were in the shopping mall with Aunt Jin, but when strangers talked to you, you were still a little irritable, right? No. 2 The line is opened after you go in, you are a complete stranger, and the security check here is strict - strange and unfriendly environment, there are many people, you must not be able to adapt to the current situation immediately - this is social anxiety."

Cheng Jing picked up the shopping bag on the ground, "As long as you don't follow the instructions of fear to escape, and don't over-interpret other people's gazes—you can buy tickets now, good man."

The "good guy" at the end is obviously a joke, but Cheng Jing's face is completely expressionless.Jiang Chuan didn't even think about it, he stretched out his hands to pinch Cheng Jing's cheeks and pulled slightly, and smiled to himself: "Please make some expressions on your face when you make a joke next time, otherwise I won't be able to hear it."

Cheng Jing: "..."

He tilted his head slightly, trying to break free from Jiang Chuan's clutches, but failed.

By now, Jiang Chuan basically realized what Cheng Jing was talking about.Before he came out, he had seen in the propaganda manual that many inmates would have social barriers after they were released from prison, and their personalities would become so strange that they could not integrate into society.At that time, Jiang Chuan looked at it in a general way out of boredom, and didn't take it seriously, and he didn't feel that he would have any social obstacles.

However, the reality is too cruel, and obstacles come first before socializing.

Jiang Chuan was never afraid of anything.Now that I understand it, I feel a little excited.The idea of ​​wanting to defeat something grew wildly in his mind, not to mention that the thin-skinned and tender boy in front of him had an attitude of "your current mental state is very dangerous", Jiang Chuan felt that he should not be underestimated.

The evil hands were pushed away by Cheng Jing. Jiang Chuan looked at the boy with a fair face and flushed face, walked happily to the small sentry box of the subway customer service center, threw the 100 yuan rolled up into thin strips into the window, and said, "Buy one Traffic card."

He bit his tongue for five characters, and the last word "ka" broke.The staff behind the window didn't notice, and lowered their heads to flatten the banknotes.

Jiang Chuan thought: Fuck his uncle's social barriers.

There were only four or five people in the subway car, and Cheng Jing was sitting opposite Jiang Chuan.He took out a kindle from his schoolbag, looked down very intently, his bangs drooped slightly, and his figure was unexpectedly cute.

Sure enough, if he grows up like this, he should be quiet and well-behaved, not the overly calm and smart before, which is too distant.Jiang Chuan sent a few text messages to Nan Xichi to indicate that he had come out, looked up and saw Cheng Jing seriously reading a book, took a photo and sent it to Nan Xichi, with two words: the best.

Nan Xichi quickly came back: You kid, aren't you, you had an affair right after you came out!

Jiang Chuan returned to his shameless nature: there is nothing he can do about being handsome.

Nan Xichi called directly, Jiang Chuan pinched him, and replied: "It's not convenient now, let's meet tonight, I have something to do with you."

The terminus of Metro Line 2 is Xitangkou.

Both Xitangkou and Xitang Ancient Town are tourist attractions, but the circumstances are very different.The latter has close to a million passengers, while the former is just a tattered Eighteenth Line.

Over the past few years, cities of all sizes have been making great efforts to develop the tourism and holiday industry, which brings in money quickly and can increase jobs without worrying about industrial pollution.However, the province is full of ancient towns, and there are already several 5A-level towns. The boss of Z City is bearded and staring, and he insists on turning Xitangkou into a characteristic cultural tourist attraction in the city, so a bunch of dilapidated and high-risk old houses are not demolished. A large entertainment venue was built nearby.Dusty and feasting coexist, and the planning is in a mess.

Jiang Chuan came out of the subway terminal, walked through the brand-new to desolate pedestrian street, and almost shed tears when he saw the familiar archway of the ancient town.

This time it wasn't because of some goddamn social barrier.

Jiang Chuan was born and raised in Xitangkou. Although this place is dilapidated and rotten, it gave him roots and a backbone.

Cheng Jing had been following Jiang Chuan in silence, but when the two of them passed through the archway, he suddenly stopped Jiang Chuan.

Cheng Jing said: "If you meet someone you don't like later, just ignore them, don't be angry."

Jiang Chuan didn't know how much Cheng Jing knew about him, and said, "It doesn't matter whether I like it or not. There are not many people in the whole street who like me."

The psychological barriers caused by social separation will be more obvious in an environment like Xitangkou.The reason is simple. Human instinct is to find a comfort zone, and only in a place that you feel familiar can you have a sufficient sense of security.But not many people in Xitangkou like Jiangchuan.The rejection given by familiar people is the deadliest.

Cheng Jing didn't know whether Jiang Chuan's situation was serious, but it was obviously not suitable for the conflict to intensify again.He fumbled for a baseball cap from his schoolbag, and Jiang Chuan was amused: "You are a treasure chest, right?"

Cheng Jing said: "Aunt Jin doesn't want you to have conflicts with the people at Xitangkou again."

Jiang Chuan raised his eyebrows, put his baseball cap on his head, and pressed his forehead slightly.If Cheng Jing hadn't moved out of Jin Min, Jiang Chuan would have created some conflicts right now.

As they walked home, they received many salutes and greetings, but none of them were aimed at Jiang Chuan.He disappeared in Xitangkou for eight months, and now he is wearing a hat that covers most of his face, and his stature has changed again. Almost no one recognizes that he is the unworthy son who stabbed a knife into his own father's stomach.

Everyone was greeting Cheng Jing.

Some people were so busy that they didn't notice who was passing by, Cheng Jing even took the initiative to go over to say hello, and then went on to say hello to the next person after they were done.

Jiang Chuan only saw this posture when he was in kindergarten. A kid as big as Doudinger would yell when he saw someone, and if the other party didn’t respond, he would rush to his ear and shout again. It must be the kind of Doudinger who is full of energy and heartless. Only then can it be done.Although Cheng Jing didn't show any expression when he said hello, Jiang Chuan was very shocked.

Walking all the way to the door of his house, Jiang Chuan took off his hat, looked at Cheng Jing seriously again, and said, "You did it on purpose, you must add trouble to me."

This time, Cheng Jing looked at him as if he was looking at a real psycho: "I have no hatred with you."

However, Jiang Chuan had a strong feeling of being tricked.Until the meeting with Nan Xichi at night, this feeling was not erased from his mind, but instead he ran towards a weirder place.

The author has something to say:

Cheng Jing: Just playing with you, beat me up?

Jiang Chuan: Don’t dare, just play casually, as long as you are happy.