why do you like me

082 letters

When he arrived at the hotel entrance, Jiang Chuan didn't plan to go up and sat in the car.No one really remembers the anniversary of Xi Yun's death.He and Nan Xichi were young at that time and didn't know what to do.Nan Xiangjun was like this, but he didn't expect that he had always remembered it in his heart, and according to the customs of Z City, he made up the anniversary of his death for three years.

Jiang Chuan lit a cigarette and didn't take two puffs. Suddenly, a shadow flew over and landed on the car door with the window half open.Jiang Chuan was taken aback, and he fixed his eyes and saw that it was the golden retriever.Cheng Jing slowly walked over from a distance, he looked so clear under the dazzling lights.

Jiang Chuan looked at him, with a thousand words stuck in his chest, pushed the door and got out of the car, pinching the cigarette with some helplessness.

Cheng Jing came over and smiled slightly: "Have you been drinking?"

"a little."

"I'll ask the hotel staff to take you back."

"Cheng Jing..." Jiang Chuan was a little aggrieved when he chased her away as soon as they met, "Are you so regretful that you don't even want to see me?"

"That's not what I meant." Cheng Jing grabbed the dog's leash, "Go up and sit down?"

Jiang Chuan hesitated: "Is Yan Qingshu there?"

"What if you're here, what if you're not?" Cheng Jing kept smiling, and that smile was inexplicably indifferent, and so light and fleeting.He took a step directly in front of Jiang Chuan and said, "Who do you want to see?"

Jiang Chuan pinched his cigarette and followed Cheng Jing up.When they reached the door, Cheng Jing didn't let Jiang Chuan in right away, and said, "Wait for a few minutes, I'll clean up."

"The people in the hotel don't clean up?"

"No." Cheng Jing pursed her lips and handed over the dog leash, "You catch up with yoyo first."

Jiang Chuan: "..."

Cheng Jing put away the medicine in the house and the toy knife under the pillow, and after seeing that there was nothing to make Jiang Chuan suspicious, he went to open the door again, with the same indifferent look: "It's so late, why is it so late?" Thinking of coming?"

Today is Xi Yun's death day... After hesitating for a moment, Jiang Chuan didn't say this sentence, watching Cheng Jing get the golden retriever to the balcony.He and Cheng Jing have known each other for so long, and they have always had a very close relationship, but suddenly they were strangers, and it was rather awkward.He didn't like the feeling, very much.

Cheng Jing looked more at ease, and asked someone to bring a tea set, and made a cup of strong tea for Jiang Chuan to hangover.

A bottle of beer can't get you drunk, Jiang Chuan didn't say a word, Cheng Jing handed it to him and drank it, after drinking a few glasses, Cheng Jing paused.The two looked at each other dryly, Cheng Jing suddenly twitched the corner of his mouth, and walked in front of Jiang Chuan.

He leaned over, put his arms over Jiang Chuan's shoulders, and leaned against the back of the leather chair behind him, with a half-smile: "Jiang Chuan, with your appearance, I would think you still like me."

Jiang Chuan looked at him.

This posture seems particularly awkward at the moment, but in the past, the two of them often used various intimate postures, hugging each other and chatting together, kissing ears and cheeks, not getting tired of it for a long time, just feeling that it was not enough.

Jiang Chuan restrained his urge to hug Cheng Jing, but Cheng Jing suddenly let go of his hand and lowered his head to kiss his lips.

"Procedure……"

Just as Jiang Chuan was about to push away, Cheng Jing fell into his arms.Single sofa, two people intertwined.Cheng Jing kissed until the corners of her eyes turned crimson, she rested her head on Jiang Chuan's neck and panted, but her hands moved restlessly between Jiang Chuan's waist and abdomen.

"Cheng Jing us..."

Jiang Chuan was stunned by Cheng Jing's actions, and was particularly aggrieved: "You and Yan Qingshu..."

"Why, do you want Yan Qingshu to come with you?" Cheng Jing licked the corner of Jiang Chuan's mouth, which smelled like bitter tea. Before Jiang Chuan could react, he pulled out the belt and bound Jiang Chuan's wrist.

Who the hell wants to come with Yan Qingshu!Jiang Chuan was anxious and angry, the fucking Cheng Jing had never said such a thing!That idiot Yan Qingshu has led Cheng Jing into ruin!He looked at Cheng Jing angrily: "Let go of me."

"No." Cheng Jing curled his lips, and sat down on Jiang Chuan's body like a child, covering Jiang Chuan's eyes with his hands, and leaned over to kiss Jiang Chuan's Adam's apple.

He kissed all the way down, biting the button and using his tongue to untie it. He took a long time to untie two pieces, and his eyes fixed on the ring hanging on Jiang Chuan's chest.Jiang Chuan took off his own ring, but kept the other one for Cheng Jing.Cheng Jing's eyes flickered, feeling sad and happy, this person loves me.

The eyes were covered by Cheng Jing's hands, and the sense of touch was infinitely magnified.Jiang Chuan felt Cheng Jing's kiss all the way down, leaving an emotional shudder on his skin.His body had already reacted, he felt embarrassed and angry, unwilling to respond, and asked Cheng Jing to stop.

Cheng Jing smiled lightly and licked his sensitive ears, then let go of one hand to look at his lustful eyes.The clothes are still there, but the chest is naked, and the hot spots of the two are offset.Cheng Jing took off his clothes and stretched himself out with one hand. He was impatient and wanted to let Jiang Chuan in after a few moves.

Jiang Chuan finally became anxious: "You will hurt like this!"

He was about to be driven crazy by Cheng Jing.I don't want to have sex in this kind of relationship, but Cheng Jing is completely dominant, and she doesn't care about it.Seeing that Cheng Jing failed to enter after several attempts, Jiang Chuan gasped and said, "Cheng Jing, let go of me, be obedient, let go of me, I won't leave."

Cheng Jing stared at him fixedly, his eyes a little distracted, and finally leaned against his chest after a long while, and slowly loosened the belt around his wrist.

Jiang Chuan didn't leave. When he woke up, it was just dawn, and Cheng Jing was lingering in his arms and was about to wake up.Jiang Chuan hugged him, Cheng Jing didn't move, and soon fell asleep again.

Jiang Chuan looked at Cheng Jing who fell asleep unconsciously, and thought he had a dream in which he and Cheng Jing broke up, and now that he woke up from the dream, Cheng Jing was still by his side, so lucky.Looking at the completely unfamiliar hotel room, he returned to reality, thankful that it suddenly turned into a kind of absurdity.

After a while, Cheng Jing finally woke up.Feeling refreshed, he found that his limbs were tightly wrapped around Jiang Chuan.Jiang Chuan didn't say anything, just looked at him like that, he let go a little embarrassed, and said "sorry".

Jiang Chuan became furious instantly. He pressed Cheng Jing's retracted arm and said, "What are you, Cheng Jing? Don't you regret it? Why do you still do this?"

"It's very comfortable doing it with you."

Cheng Jing's words made Jiang Chuan so angry that he threw off the quilt and got out of bed, and ran to the living room to get dressed.Cursing while wearing it: "You don't even wear a fucking condom, you don't do anything, you are so comfortable."

Cheng Jing also sat up, hugged the quilt and buried her face in it, laughing nonstop.How bad I am, he thought, looking up to see Jiang Chuan standing in front of the room with his clothes on, his face full of anger.

Cheng Jing: "Let's go after breakfast, there is a kitchen over there."

Jiang Chuan: "..."

In the early morning, Jiang Chuan didn't want to quarrel with Cheng Jing, so he turned to look in the refrigerator.Cheng Jing casually found a robe and put it on, leaning against the door frame to watch Jiang Chuan busy in the kitchen.

Jiang Xing felt that there was nothing attractive about Jiang Chuan, but Cheng Jing felt that everything about Jiang Chuan was fatally attractive.This person is not perfect, he can't plan his life, he has too few ideas, and he only likes to circle around the people around him.What a terrible thing to say, it does not meet the secular definition of success at all.But Jiang Chuan didn't have any idea about the so-called success, he just wanted to keep the people around him, and he did it.So far, all the people around him are still...

Cheng Jing looked down at his faint shadow on the floor, but I couldn't keep anyone around me.

During breakfast, the two of them didn't talk much, but they wouldn't be as tense as they were talking and could quarrel at any time.Jiang Chuan watched as Cheng Jing finished eating a bowl of porridge, a piece of toast and half a glass of milk, and said, "When Xingzi was being treated three years ago, there was a man in the hospital who was chasing my mother. Do you remember?"

"Well, remember."

"He proposed to my mother."

"Auntie agreed?"

"That man also has a child at home, a little older than Xingzi. My mother wants to wait until Xingzi goes to college before getting married, otherwise it will be bad for Xingzi."

"That will have to wait until next summer at least." Cheng Jing said casually, "Can I go... Or, I can send a gift there."

"Come here, don't bring Yan Qingshu."

Cheng Jing laughed.

He didn't want to use Yan Qingshu as an excuse.No matter how it was rumored outside, the two of them were not a legitimate couple.But Jiang Chuan was so stubborn that he didn't think so, thinking that the two were in a relationship.He felt a little sour, and felt that Jiang Chuan was too cute.

At this moment, he squinted his eyes at Jiang Chuan, and said calmly, "Next summer, who knows who I will bring there."

"Cheng Jing!"

Jiang Chuan was really going to be offended by Cheng Jing's cynical and frivolous attitude, "So you don't want me even if you find someone casually, right?"

He was a little sad: "You are right. I am a person who lacks imagination for the future and has no plans. A long time ago, there were many people who pursued my mother. But my mother trusts others too easily. I am afraid that she will meet The second Jiang Guodong. I think she is very hard alone, and I hope she will remarry. I have never thought about what I should do after she remarries. Xingzi is not young, and she has special ideas. I don’t know what she wants in the future. Why, but you won't be with me anyway."

He looked at the boy opposite, "I will indeed become a person. But it is you, Cheng Jing, who makes me become a person."

Jiang Chuan left before finishing breakfast, and Cheng Jing sat at the dining table the whole time.The golden retriever walked up and down the room, as if looking for traces of Jiang Chuan.Cheng Jing ate his breakfast slowly. He was already very full, but he wanted to finish all the food on the table.

During the game, Jiang Chuan sent people to deliver the food, and he tried his best to eat it all.

In fact, the food made by others is not bad, especially the chefs of big hotels, who can make it completely in line with the taste after communication.Those are the only things he likes to eat. No matter what kind of delicacies other people make, he can't help but compare with Jiang Chuan's.With a comparison in mind, I don't want to eat other people's cooking, just stuff a few mouthfuls, and I will be satisfied.

It was almost ten o'clock after eating, and the last few mouthfuls were all cold. Cheng Jing asked someone to come in to clean up, and went to the bathroom to wash up.He didn't know how it ended last night. Anyway, he just clung to Jiang Chuan, and he guessed that he was also stuck to Jiang Chuan when he took a shower.He touched the messy hickey on his neck, and felt that Jiang Chuan was really cute.

He didn't want to leave the room where Jiang Chuan stayed, so for the first time in a long time, he didn't go to the club during training time, and he nestled on the sofa to do data, with the golden retriever squatting beside him.

I was too full and my stomach hurt a bit, so I got stomach medicine and took two tablets.At noon, the housekeeper came to ask about lunch, Cheng Jing felt that he was not hungry yet, so he shook his head and said no.The housekeeper only thought that he didn't eat anymore, so he said, "Then I'll prepare fruit and vegetable juice for you?"

Cheng Jing smiled: "No need, bring a cup of coffee over in an hour."

He didn't expect that this was the last time Jiang Chuan saw him.For the game a few days later, extra food should have been delivered to the scene, but this time there was none.The girl in charge of this matter has also developed a habit. Cheng Jing was not counted when ordering food, and Cheng Jing will really be hungry next time.

Cheng Jing doesn't swear, but my sister is afraid of Yan Qingshu's swearing, so she immediately ordered another one.Cheng Jing was a little disappointed, and comforted lightly on his face: "It's okay, I can't eat it either."

It was only at night that Yan Qingshu realized that Cheng Jing hadn't eaten all day, so he asked someone to bring seafood porridge to the room, and he stared at Cheng Jing to eat.While staring at it, he complained: "People are rushing over, but you insist on driving them away. Now that people are really gone, you are so virtuous, so you are not tired."

Cheng Jing ignored him and picked out the abalone from the porridge for the golden retriever to eat.

Yan Qingshu slumped on the sofa, "You don't have to be so extreme, I won't eat Jiang Chuan."

"You won't eat Jiang Chuan, you will use his relationship with me to help you eat the financial market." Cheng Jing looked up at him with cold eyes, "You'd better, don't have any thoughts about Jiang Chuan."

What Jiang Chuan is doing is a high-risk business, and he doesn't have enough background to save the day. If Yan Qingshu wants to deal with him, no matter whether he will be caught or not, the investigation by the tax bureau and the industry and commerce bureau will consume half his life.Even if Jiang Chuan did a good job of avoiding risks, some incompetent but envious people took the opportunity to add insult to injury and accuse Jiang Chuan of some trumped-up charges, which is bad enough.

Although the professor does not interfere with Jiang Chuan's company affairs, he knows what Jiang Chuan is doing.Although there are risks, he thinks that the fear of risks in this business is the number one joke.One day, the professor called Cheng Jing over and said, "There has been no one in the financial information sector for the past two years. Now they are looking for me for a recommendation. Have you considered it?"

"Over there" are naturally several major government departments related to finance, and talents are in short supply.When Jiang Chuan was in graduate school, the professor mentioned it.But Jiang Chuan was only thinking about making money to get Xie Jiayu's company, and he didn't think about it at all.

When I mention it now, I still don’t have that idea, and said, “I’m not that kind of material.”

As far as what he is doing now, once he enters the system, there will be nothing left.Cheng Yumin is such a capable person, he had to trade with Nie Yizhi to get to that position. Jiang Chuan knew that he had nothing, pure cannon fodder.

The professor quite likes Jiang Chuan's fierce middle school temperament, but he said it with a hint of reminder: "The Shiting Group has collapsed, and the news of the transfer of assets by Zhao Chenxi and other big bosses has been spread. It is a shame to find out that you are big trouble."

Jiang Chuan heard about this, and said, "If Zhao Chenxi and the others think that they can save themselves by dragging one person into the water, then I will definitely not be able to escape. However, I helped them minimize the risk. Anyone with a brain should know that unless They will be punished by death in the future, otherwise it will be no good to drag me into the water."

Afraid of what might happen, Jiang Chuan thought about it and asked, "Then are you short of people now?"

The professor smiled at him.

Jiang Chuan didn't beat around the bush, and said, "I won't worry about public office. I have done a financial AI project before. If you think it can make a difference, I will go back to study with you and continue to work on this area." How about research?"

Jiang Chuan had imagined before that the current information technology cannot monitor Bitcoin, but when AI develops to a certain stage, it may be possible to track Bitcoin throughout the process.Mobile payment technology is fully mature, and some people imagine that paperless transactions will be realized in the future.At that time, where is the distinction between virtual currency and real currency?These forward-looking topics require bold conjectures and meticulous explorations. Among the people the professor can think of, Jiang Chuan is naturally indispensable.

Jiang Chuan brought it up on his own initiative, and the professor couldn't say anything else. Two days later, he sent an invitation letter, which was a research activity about the establishment of a regional intergovernmental financial international organization. The location was Mumbai, India, and the duration was half a year.

Jiang Chuan explained to Nan Xichi and Jin Min, and then wanted to say goodbye to Cheng Jingdao.But he was afraid that after seeing Cheng Jing, he would be played by Cheng Jing again like last time, so he suppressed this idea.

He took a short break before boarding the plane, turned off the computer, took out his mobile phone to read the news, and couldn't help but click on the live broadcast app.Cheng Jing doesn't play live broadcasts, but his teammates do. Jiang Chuan walked around several rooms, catching a word or two of "Young Master" swishing past in the comment area, and suddenly heard a person chanting a fan's question: " Why did the young master retire?"

Jiang Chuan stopped when he was about to withdraw.

The man said: "The reason why the young master is the young master is because he is delicate and expensive. It seems that he passed out after staying up all night for a few nights. You have to watch the boss's live broadcast to ask about this matter, his people He knows best. But the boss is not in the country now, so it's useless for you to worry."

Hold.

Jiang Chuan clicked on Weibo, Cheng Jing did not update the data for several days.

It was almost time to board the plane, Jiang Chuan sighed, and called Wei Zhan.

When Wei Zhan found the club, only Cheng Jing was reviewing the game in the training room, and the golden retriever was playing by himself with a ball in his mouth.Wei Zhan knocked on the door and shouted, "Excuse me."

Cheng Jing was a little surprised: "Doctor Wei, long time no see."

He walked over, invited Wei Zhan to sit down in the living room, and then went to find refreshments.Wei Zhan watched his movements and said, "Why are you alone?"

"They went to a barbecue, and I didn't know how to eat those things, so I didn't go." He dug out a can of Jin Junmei, "Is black tea okay?"

"You don't have to be too polite. I heard that you fainted a few days ago, come and have a look." Wei Zhan put down the things in his hand, "Can you tell me the reason for the fainting?"

Probably because of the reason for psychological counseling, Wei Zhan's tone always reveals a kind of irony and patience, gentle and gentle temperament.Cheng Jing also ironed the post, but she seemed too cold.He came over with a tea set and said, "I suffered from insomnia for a few days, and I didn't pay attention to stepping on the air under my feet. I fell and passed out immediately. The doctor said that my blood sugar was low."

Wei Zhan looked at him: "Cheng Jing, I'm also a doctor."

Or the same doctor who checked you out for depression.

Cheng Jing changed the topic, handed the soaked Jin Junmei to Wei Zhan, saw the "Financial Alchemy" he had placed next to him, and said, "Are you interested in finance now?"

Wei Zhan: "I want to find some common topics with the patient, so I asked Jiang Chuan to borrow it."

This "patient" was a pun, Cheng Jing pursed her lips and looked at Wei Zhan.Wei Zhan smiled, reached out and stroked his hair, as if taking care of his younger brother.It's pointless to try this way, Wei Zhan said: "Your depression before is almost cured, but I'm still quite worried about the current situation."

Cheng Jing casually opened the book, the inside pages were older than the cover, and there was a folded blue paper between them.He skipped the piece of paper, flipped through it casually, and said, "There's nothing serious about it. I went to the doctor regularly when I was in Korea."

Wei Zhan suddenly pulled out the blue paper, "Do you remember what this is?"

Cheng Jing looked at him, not knowing why.

Wei Zhan spread out the piece of paper. The paper was clean, except for two lines of traditional Chinese characters written with a brush: last year the flowers were not old, and this year the moon is round again.Don't teach to be biased, and Huaheyue, everyone is a young man.

Cheng Jing thought for a while, and remembered that Jiang Chuan had kept it in the book as a bookmark, and then realized that the bookmark was originally a lantern, and the words on it were written by him.

"Cheng Jing, you didn't immediately remember what this is." Wei Zhan's eyes revealed worry, "If you really don't care about the past with Jiang Chuan, it's okay to forget the first gift Jiang Chuan asked you for. I'm just afraid , is another situation—the depression has been severe enough to give you symptoms of amnesia.”

Cheng Jing was stunned for a moment, then quickly calmed down, and said nonchalantly, "It's not that serious, I'm just mentally ill."

Wei Zhan didn't listen to his fooling around, and stretched out the hand wearing the ivy leaf silver ring, and said, "Jiang Chuan told me everything about you, and I already knew when he asked me where I bought the ring." .I hope you are willing to receive treatment, and I will arrange for a more professional doctor to take charge, and the treatment will be kept confidential."

Cheng Jing looked at the ring on his hand.

Wei Zhan continued: "No matter what kind of relationship you have with Yan Qingshu now, he should not hinder your treatment. You don't need to worry about what Yan Qingshu will do to me. Neither he nor Nie Yizhi can touch me. .”

Cheng Jing actually has a doctor.He needs to prescribe sleeping pills regularly, and the doctor in charge of this is arranged by Yan Qingshu.Because of this, Cheng Jing didn't bother to say anything, and the depression was simply relying on drugs.

The person Wei Zhan arranged to come over was a girl with a round face, two years older than Cheng Jing, and she spoke with a bookish air.After getting along for a while, Cheng Jing found that this girl was a little cute, and sometimes she didn't know that Yan Qingshu teased her, and her eyes would only shine when talking about treatment and celebrity gossip.

The previous treatments had no effect. Cheng Jing was very afraid that he would really lose his memory. He didn't want to forget Jiang Chuan.Therefore, when chatting with cute girls, he sometimes mentioned Jiang Chuan, trying to think about some tiny details.The girl is also careful, and when talking about anything later, she will always pull Jiang Chuan intentionally or unintentionally.Anyway, now Jiang Chuan doesn't contact him anymore, so don't worry about it, and don't need to hide it, Cheng Jing just talked to the girl, as if he had gone through his childhood again in his heart, and there was no one else in the time.

It's just that sometimes when depression breaks out, the warmer the thing, the more deadly desolation, especially now that Jiang Chuan is completely indifferent to him, Cheng Jing feels that he killed something with his own hands.

He tried hard to tell himself that Jiang Chuan found Wei Zhan anyway, but the comfort only lasted half a second, and he was immediately overwhelmed by great pain.

Until more than three months later, Cheng Jing suddenly received a letter from Mumbai, India, from Jiang Chuan——

Cheng Jing, I am writing this letter to you at the port of Mumbai.

I remember when I was a freshman, the teacher asked us to write letters to people who were not around but missed us very much.At that time, I felt that I would never have the opportunity to write letters in my life, because the person I missed was by my side.

I have been in Mumbai for 108 days.Out of the urban area, there is a lot of dust, and it looks worse than Xitangkou.When I was very tired, I went to the pier alone to have a hair dryer.There are people selling puri cakes here, and there are always many children around them, dark and thin, but smiling happily.The colleagues who came together are very envious, saying that this kind of life makes people feel comfortable and content.

The best distance between people is like this, nodding acquaintances.You don't need to understand other people's suffering and misfortune, you just need to imagine that other people's smiles are the brightest in the world.

I sat for a long time, and suddenly denied the idea just now.I can't do that with you.

You mean more to my life than anyone else.I have experienced disbelief, incomprehension, hope for our future, guilt for you, doubt and resentment for myself.Maybe it's because I haven't really liked anything for more than 20 years, so I can't let go of liking you, and I can't let go of your current attitude.

After 108 days one after another, maybe I will forget you.It doesn't matter if you can't forget, I love you willingly.

Without me, I hope you can still be healthy and happy, and spend your life peacefully.

This letter was more effective than the best medicine, Cheng Jing read it over and over again, reluctant to throw it away.At night, he didn't go back to the hotel either, but walked into a cafe halfway, thinking about what he wanted to write to Jiang Chuan, even though he knew he wouldn't send it.

At that time, he received a call from Yan Qingshu: "Cheng Jing, I killed Nie Mingting."