Roommate says he's straight

After a very friendly meeting, a very meaningful mutual assistance agreement was reached. On the bus back to school, Chen Mengyuan was obviously in a better mood. She leaned back in her chair and sighed: "The tiramisu in that restaurant Su Ke is really delicious."

Luo Meng turned her head and asked, "Do you like tiramisu very much?"

"Well, my favorite in West Point." Chen Mengyuan nodded heavily.

Luo Meng smiled, a little bit just in time for the joy of her confidant, and said: "What a coincidence, I am too."

Chen Mengyuan's eyes lit up, and he asked excitedly: "Then do you know any place in City A that sells this delicious food? Let's forget about this restaurant. It's so expensive per capita. I'm too embarrassed to come in and just order a tiramisu. .”

"Of course there is." Luo Meng's first reaction was the Chenguang Library, the place that made him laugh and cry.

He told Chen Mengyuan, and the other party had obviously heard of it, and said, "That is a very literary and bourgeoisie place, right? I heard from my roommate, take me there next time you are free! I can tell, it is definitely worth following you." delicious!"

The two chatted a few more words on other topics, and found that their preferences were very consistent.

They are not very good at spicy food but like spicy food. They both love to eat barbecue, and they all like exquisite and creative dishes. When chatting, the topic revolves around eating. Realizing this problem, the two They looked at each other and smiled a little embarrassedly.

Chen Mengyuan studied graphic design at the Academy of Art and has many years of art skills. Luo Meng was quiet when he was a child and had studied sketching for several years. They changed the topic and they also had a good chat.

Girls from the Art Academy lived in Beiyuan. Luo Meng helped Chen Mengyuan carry the luggage all the way. When passing by Beiyuan Supermarket, Chen Mengyuan wanted to go in to buy some pencils, so Luo Meng went in with her.

In front of the stationery shelf, Chen Mengyuan picked out a pencil of HB, 2B, 4B, and 6B, turned around and smiled at Luo Meng: "I guess you haven't used a pencil since you graduated from high school. My mother used to say that I don't use pens. It's eating pens."

Luo Meng also laughed, and replied, "I haven't used up the pencils I bought when I was learning how to draw, and they are still in the study."

With a sound of "click", Luo Meng heard the movement, and turned his head to see two girls running away holding the mobile phone in a panic. He frowned in doubt, didn't think too much, and sent Chen Mengyuan back to the dormitory.

After returning to Xiyuan, he still didn’t see Zhang Chenguang. Thinking that we usually have dinner together, and today I forgot to inform him that he didn’t look for him, Luo Meng was a little disappointed. He asked Wu Hang and Bian Yutao: “Has Zhang Chenguang not come back?”

Wu Hang replied: "Yeah, I haven't seen anyone since I went out in the afternoon, I thought I was with you."

Luo Meng returned to her seat, took out her mobile phone and hesitated to ask him where he had been, but did he have the qualifications and position, and his heart became heavy again. Luo Meng looked at the night outside the window, completely clueless. In the starry night, the moon with a missing corner hangs in the sky, just like his heart that cannot be taken back after handing it over, is already incomplete, and he is still worried about whether there will be a more fragmented day.

Zhang Chenguang asked Chen Xiaoman out for a drink.

He and Chen Xiaoman are old classmates who are both familiar and unfamiliar. Chen Xiaoman came to city A in the fourth grade and became Zhang Chenguang's classmate. He was still in the same class for three years in junior high school, and the same school in high school. Chen Xiaoman went to the United States in his second year of high school, but every year these old classmates Will find time to party, not to mention unfamiliar.

But Zhang Chenguang has been a class leader, a top student, and a famous figure in the school since he was a child. Although Chen Xiaoman has good grades, he has always been a little transparent in the circle because of his personality and other reasons. The two of them don't have much contact with each other except for their daily classmates.

After hearing that Zhang Chenguang invited him alone, although Chen Xiaoman went to the appointment on time, he was still at a loss.

Especially when he saw Zhang Chenguang at the bar, the other party asked him: "Do you have any cigarettes?"

Chen Xiaoman really felt that Zhang Chenguang had run into an evil, he had never seen the other party smoking, Zhang Chenguang was known for his self-discipline and self-motivation.

Having said that, he still took a bag out of his pocket and threw it over.

Zhang Chenguang took out one and held it between his fingers, and borrowed a fire from Chen Xiaoman to light it.

In fact, even he himself finds it a little funny. He has never liked the smell of cigarettes, nor does he look down on people who like to smoke. In Zhang Chenguang's eyes, smoking is something that incompetent and boring people do to relieve their inner depression. He doesn't need it. .

Who wants Feng Shui to take turns, let's see who is spared by the sky.

Chen Xiaoman, who is well-versed in human affairs, can see at a glance that this proud son of heaven has also fallen into a situation where he is trapped by love and uses tobacco and alcohol to relieve his worries.

The most embarrassing thing was that he obviously didn't know how to smoke, he choked before taking two puffs, and coughed embarrassingly.

Zhang Chenguang watched Chen Xiaoman turn his back to snigger, and stubbed out the cigarette butt in a bit of embarrassment.

He said, "Have you laughed enough?"

"No no no no no no no, I mean I didn't smile." Chen Xiaoman controlled his expression, turned around and said hypocritically.

Zhang Chenguang sighed, not in the mood to argue with him.

Chen Xiaoman pulled out the chair and sat down, took a comfortable sitting position, and said, "Come on, I'm ready to listen to a love story that doesn't go well but is full of passion."

This base is different from the other, and has a special meaning, so Zhang Chenguang raised his eyebrows: "You know?"

Chen Xiaoman laughed lightly, and laughed at himself: "Otherwise, why would you look for me? Isn't the only special thing about me in the circle now is that I'm gay."

Zhang Chenguang wanted to take a cigarette in distress, but found that he had already put it in the ashtray. He could only scratch his hair irritably, and then asked, "How did you find out that you like men?"

Chen Xiaoman took a sip of his wine and denied it: "I don't think I like men, all I like is my lover."

Zhang Chenguang has heard the argument that he (she) is the one who loves him (her) rather than gender, but this simple sentence is not enough to support him through his inner confusion and struggle.

He continued to ask: "Then how do you confirm that you are deeply in love with that person, even making you ignore the gender?"

At this moment, Chen Xiaoman looked at Zhang Chenguang's eyes, just like looking at an unworldly child. He smiled gently and said: "If you love someone, your heart will tell you. If you want to be close to him, want to look at him, you are willing Pay, want to make him happy, he is like a light in your heart, he can light up your dark and barren heart with a slight smile, if you happen to know that he thinks the same about you, then you will become the world immediately The happiest person in the world. If you know that no one else can make you like this, then it doesn't matter what gender he is."

Zhang Chenguang froze, every word Chen Xiaoman said gathered into Luo Meng's image in his heart.

I actually like him too, right?

Zhang Chenguang's heart has already been gradually surrendering, but the traditional concepts of nearly 20 years have allowed him to overthrow them all in a few days. When he thinks about the future, the recognition of society, the acceptance of relatives and friends, there are countless difficulties in his heart. The hurdle that was crossed.

Just like what he said to Qiao Jiayi, if he just wanted to play casually, then he would have no pressure and would have no scruples. It is precisely because he wants to take his relationship seriously that he has countless hesitation and retreat.

But now at least he can no longer deceive himself, he doesn't have any strange feelings for the boy of the same gender as him.

He has, and it's stronger than he thought at first.

During those days of the cold war with Luo Meng, Zhang Chenguang's heart was also empty. Seeing him go out with Qi Rong for the whole vacation, learn to drink, and be late, he was anxious and angry, and even became hostile to Qi Rong. Compromising with Luo Meng again and again, I feel incredible in retrospect.

This is not Zhang Chenguang's behavior style, let alone his principle of life.

But he still did it involuntarily, so what could he do?

What should I do, Zhang Chenguang asked Chen Xiaoman for help in distress: "I like a boy, what should I do?"

"What are you worrying about? The other party doesn't like you?" Chen Xiao was puzzled.

Zhang Chenguang shook his head, and told the story between him and Luo Meng, talking upside down about his inner distress, the obstacles he thought, and finally he even began to spurn himself who was not brave enough but reluctant to give up.

Chen Xiaoman shook his head helplessly, and said: "You elites really think a lot. Do you think that I have never questioned and struggled in my heart? I also grew up under the red flag when I was a child. At that time, I still secretly felt that I was a pervert. Besides, even if we only talked about conditions regardless of gender, I was an ordinary person. No matter whether it was a man or a woman, it seemed that I was not worthy of my lover. But his thoughts were very different. Simple, he asked me directly, if he was hit by a car tomorrow or my plane crashed tomorrow, would he regret that we didn't cherish the present and not be together before he died, then of course I would regret it, definitely, absolutely regret it, this would be The most regretful thing in my life, thinking about it, I have no more worries, so we are together."

Zhang Chenguang propped his head and listened quietly.

Chen Xiaoman took a sip of wine to moisten his throat, and continued: "Even if you find a perfect lover who matches all the conditions now, and you swear to spend your life together and receive everyone's blessings, there may still be problems in your own or the outside world in the future." All kinds of problems caused your happiness to come to a bleak end, but the happiness you once had is real. In the same way, even if you and your classmate Luo Meng don’t get blessings from the outside world, the relationship is ultimately two people. Even if you can't make it to the end, you still have it."

Chen Xiaoman thought he had said it all. He drank the wine in his glass and finally said: "There is no natural happiness in life. Being in love is already a very lucky thing. The rest depends on each other's hard work and management. I say everything It's over, I still have to video with my lover tonight, I'm leaving first, please treat me to this meal."

Chen Xiaoman patted Zhang Chenguang's shoulder and left the bar. Zhang Chenguang drank the remaining wine on the table in one gulp. The thoughts of freedom in his mind were rushing left and right, wanting to break out of the traditional shackles.

He had a splitting headache, wanted to divert his attention, and opened WeChat. The class group was bustling with excitement. Shao Yang Aite posted everyone and attached a link to the school's post bar.

He said: "Everyone, go and have a look, my God, Luo Meng is on fire."

Zhang Chenguang's eyes froze for a moment.

The author has something to say:

There will be a small leap in the plot soon~