I'm not a scumbag

Bucheng did not express any opinions. He is not a person who likes to criticize others, nor is he qualified.The three views can be inconsistent, but there is no need to say it.

"Does he know?" Bucheng asked.

"Did you say Xie You? You know, although you never said it, after all these years, you know it." Yao Hua said.

"So many years?"

Yao Hua flicked the broken hair from his ears and put it behind his ears, "Yes, his father and I have always been members of this club, starting when Xie You was three years old."

Bucheng was silent for a while, thinking of some bad things, and thinking of many possibilities.

Seeing that Bu Cheng frowned slightly, Yao Hua knew that although the other party didn't say anything, he must not be used to this kind of behavior in his heart.

"His father and I were born in relatively open families, and our concepts are similar. Sex and love are never the same thing, and there is no necessary connection between them. We can try with different people to meet our physical needs. , but this does not prevent my favorite is still his father." Yao Hua said, "Ethics and morals are essentially a kind of social norms. Since they are social, they must be artificially stipulated. Some people think that they should be However, some people think that such regulations are okay, as long as they do not harm the interests of others and are voluntary, we do not think this is something that violates the principles of ethics, although most people in society still do not accept it.”

Only after Yao Hua finished speaking did he feel that he had said too much, as long as they knew this in their own minds, there was no need to explain it to others.

"Sorry Xiaobu, I'm not trying to instill our values ​​in you."

"I know, I'll go back and have a look at this matter." Bucheng said, "I'll go and walk over there. The evidence and so on are destroyed by you."

Yao Hua put down a heavy stone in his heart. MJ has existed for so many years. Of course, it not only has achievements in business, but also has a close relationship with some departments.

Bucheng went home early and did not tell Xie You.

The moment the door opened, they almost looked at each other.

Xie You, Zhong Kai, a very delicate and beautiful man, an old man with slightly curly hair.

The four of them had a happy chat like old friends, and an outsider in Bucheng was a little embarrassed.

"Um, this is me, my boyfriend, um." Bucheng heard Xie You introduce them.

The old man was kind and nodded slightly to say hello, and Bucheng also greeted them symbolically, and sat down beside Xie You.

"A senior, Professor Ji, a psychologist from X Academy." Xie You said to Bucheng, "You should know Zhong Kai, this is Professor Ji's graduate student, currently in the second year of research."

The one who was more surprised was Zhong Kai. How did he become a boyfriend after the promised funder.

Professor Ji looked at Bucheng for a while, and suddenly realized, "You seem to be the boy who followed Xie You before? I remembered, and it really is, time flies so fast."

Bucheng also remembered that before Bucheng was hospitalized with appendicitis, it seemed that Xie You had visited this elder. Xie You didn't say who it was, only that it was an elder, and Bucheng didn't ask much.

When Bucheng came, they seemed to have finished their business, they were talking about some old things, but it was Zhong Kai who talked a lot.

Bucheng understands, it should be the old man and the young and beautiful man who came to see Xie You, and Zhong Kai heard that they were coming to Xie You, and he hadn't contacted Xie You for a long time, so he followed the young and beautiful man. It's just that Bucheng didn't quite understand why a psychologist brought his students to see Xie You.

In the end, Xie You and Bu Cheng went downstairs to send people away.

Zhong Kai refused to accept it, "Okay, you boy, you kicked the house after you got angry? Do you remember that you haven't come to see me for a few months?"

Xie You choked back, "Who is the busiest person who doesn't have time to make an appointment with me?" He said with a meaningful glance at that beautiful man.

Zhong Kai laughed awkwardly.

It's even, as expected, they smell like each other, both of them are sleazy bastards.

"To be honest, let's go have a meal together some other day, and call this buddy... No, your boyfriend too."

"can."

"Let's go first." Zhong Kai said.

From the moment he entered the house, Bucheng's eyes almost never left Xie You.

Xie You couldn't laugh or cry, he knew that if he didn't explain this, it would be difficult for him to get over it.

In the past, Xie You might have passed away vaguely, and there was nothing to say about the past, but now, he also knows that he can no longer be vague about Bucheng. Be honest with people.

He has to tell him what Bucheng wants to know, without reservation.

"I'm his patient. He brought his students here to set an example for his students by treating me as a successful case of disease treatment." Xie You said.

"What disease?"

"Depression." Xie You said with a smile, understating it, "Can't you see it?"

Bucheng's expression was calm, without much ups and downs.

Instead, Xie You was surprised, "Aren't you surprised?"

Bucheng was not surprised, because he checked it out, he paid attention to it, and felt that some of Xie You's words and deeds were strange five years ago. The morning is light and the night is heavy, and he can't sleep almost every night. Occasionally, he feels like he has gone to another world. , and the songs he wrote, almost all reveal the struggle of life and death.

I occasionally chatted with Lei Ge before, and Bucheng asked how Lei Ge and Xie You met.

Lei Ge said that he saved the life of Xie You, who was about to be beaten to death. In fact, Lei Ge felt the same strange thing. Xie You was lying on the ground, looking at the dark sky. For a moment, Lei Zhengming felt This person really didn't want to survive.Although Xie You seemed to be very grateful to him for saving him afterwards, and his temperament seemed very lively and cheerful, which was completely different from that night.

Xie You joined the band with Lei Zhengming. It seems that he was born with a talent for music, and he also likes music very much. To a certain extent, he is extremely dependent on music. He learned quickly and wrote many amazing songs. He listened positively and depressed. Very wonderful melody.

Xie You smiled and sat next to Bucheng, "It's very strange to say this, I have been a three-good student in my class since I was a child, and my academic performance has always been very good. After a while in junior high school, I came back immediately. I don’t have to worry about money, food and clothing, and my personality is not bad. My classmates like to play with me, and my teacher likes me too. win?"

Bu Cheng always felt that if it wasn't for him who was sitting here, Xie You would have been kicked to death.

"But I got this disease inexplicably." Xie You said, "I don't know when it started, or it was born like this."

"When did you find out?" Bucheng asked.

"In the first year of high school, I always felt that there was something wrong with me. Everyone said that I was the proud son of heaven. My parents would be so happy to have a child like me. But I don't think so. I always feel that I am always unhappy. Not interested in anything, 1% test paper, No.[-] ranking, all kinds of messy awards, none of which can make me feel that I am very good, and there are so many things that are worth being happy." Xie You said, "Then look at extracurricular Shu accidentally saw this, so he went to the hospital to see it."

Do you go by yourself...

"And then?" Bucheng asked.

"Then I came back with a bunch of medicines. Professor Ji said that mine is different from others, endogenous depression, have you heard of it?"

Bucheng shook his head.

"The general meaning is that it has nothing to do with whether you are optimistic or not. Some hormones in your brain are naturally less than others, such as dopamine, 5-hydroxytryptamine and so on. He suggested that I bring my parents with me. I don't think it is necessary. Professor Ji also I didn't say much, but I just left my contact information, so that I must go to him if I have anything beyond my mind in the future." Xie You said, "I feel lucky to have met a more responsible doctor."

"Will you be sad?" Bucheng said, "When you get sick."

Xie You shook his head and smiled, "That meeting was only mild."

Then there are serious times.

"When it's really serious," Xie You stopped suddenly when he said this, looked at Bucheng, opened his arms to him, and pretended to sigh, "Hey, it's really terrible when it's serious, come here, give me a hug."

Bu Cheng was taken aback, but Xie You had already stood up and moved towards him, stepping onto Bu Cheng's lap. "It's really too miserable, I have to give you a hug."

Bucheng chuckled, but still obediently raised his arm and put it on the man's waist.

"When you left completely," Xie You looked into Bucheng's eyes and said, "I couldn't sleep at night, let me declare first that I really didn't excuse myself, although there was some meaning in this regard, if you listened You will feel that you are in a better mood and you have achieved your goal, and that bastard didn't have a good life back then."

The side effects of some things always show up after a long time. Xie You habitually looked for people's shoulder sockets, but found that there was nothing around them, and realized that people had been driven away by him for a long time.

Bucheng hugged the man in his arms, rested his shoulder on the man's shoulder, and said a few words, "Well, you deserve it."

Xie You: "..."

"Okay, I really deserve it. Once again, the whole network was hacked two years ago, and I realized that my mentality is not good at all." Xie You said, "Little K was taken away by the company to be an assistant for someone else. I was so busy dealing with my negative drafts, Zhong Kai helped me a lot during that time. Professor Ji has always cared about me, and I don’t know why, but I always feel very lucky to be surrounded by good people , fortunately, it was finally fixed, and two years later, you came back."

Xie You said it lightly, but Bucheng knew that the process was far from simple, if only he would be there at that time, he thought.

This is his brother, and this is the person he likes. When he was saddest, he was not by his side.

In fact, the fact that Xie You didn't want him has both advantages and disadvantages. At least after making such a fuss for a while, people finally stopped being chaotic, and finally took the initiative to show him the whole of himself, without hiding anything, and accepting the other party completely, but This process took five years, and the cost was so high that he even had to take various risks, such as what if Xie You didn't make it through and committed suicide.

Now when Bucheng thinks of those entertainers who committed suicide in the entertainment industry, he feels terrified.

"If you make a mistake, you will be punished." Bucheng rubbed Xie You's soft sweater with his nose.

Xie You laughed, "Yes—ah—" the voice dragged on.