Rest and Be Thankful

Monday, April 12

"I'm afraid you'll have to get another one."

Cam stared at the back of the plumber's head, thanking himself for the fact that he was still focusing on the old boiler, instead of seeing the obvious drooling expression on his face when he heard the news, as if there was something real in his throat. something stuck.

"How much will it cost?" Cam asked.

Cam spent three days praying for the heating system to restore itself before he had to call Alan Glenn, the only plumber for miles around.The sudden cold snap forced him to succumb, fearing that the water pipe might burst at any moment.

Allen looked back at Cam.He is a rare person with less gray hair, but his skin is smooth and wrinkle-free, and his black eyebrows are thick, making it difficult to judge his age.As he calculated the price in his mind, those two shocking bushy eyebrows frowned. "It's an old system," he said finally. "All told, I reckon it will cost fourteen or five pounds."

Cam pursed his lips and nodded slightly.He had hoped it would be a minor inconvenience and not cost a fortune.Bad luck.

He hasn't had much luck lately.

"It seemed to work fine, though," Allen added, as if to cheer Cam up a bit. "How long have you used it?"

"As far as I know, it's been here since my family bought it," Cam replied. "More than 20 years."

"That's right, people don't do such a good job anymore," Allen said with regret, and he turned his head to look at the dark lower cupboard. "The new ones don't last as long."

They all contemplated for a moment the malfunctioning boiler: the once-white shell had been stained gray, beckoning of its age.Massive amounts of rust creeping down the hull line envelop the entire bottom corner like patches of eczema.

Why can't it last a little longer?Cam can't pay for repairs and updates right now.Just no money.He pursed his lips, not letting Alan discover his despair when he heard such ordinary news.His stomach churned with resentment at the thought of Allen gossip about himself with the other villagers.He could think of what gossip those people would say.

He can't seem to afford a few thousand pounds for a new boiler.Business must be bad...

Cam cleared his throat. "So, you're saying you can't fix it?" That's a bit off.What he thought was a kind of plea, but when he said it, it was a bit like... unbelief.Apparently, that was the tone Allen heard, and when he looked at Cam, he looked a little insulted.

"Yes," said the plumber tensely. "Anyone who asks will tell you that."

marvelous.Now he thought Cam was questioning his integrity.

Cam thought about telling the truth that he couldn't afford anything.But in the end he just said, "Okay then, thank you for being so urgent that you can come here immediately." He flinched at the lingering callousness, but Alan didn't mind.His annoyed expression disappeared, and he even gave Cam a friendly nod.

"It's all right," he replied, picking up the toolbox.But judging from the next sentence, he didn't grasp Cam's subtext. "So, want me to get you some catalogs out of the car? You gotta order a new water heater fast if you want me to get work done fast. New Year's is not a good time to buy parts."

"Oh no, come on!" Cam blurted out.Allen frowned in confusion, while Cam racked his brains to find a reason. "I—uh, I might as well ask someone else if they can fix it."

The air was quiet for a while, and Cam's heart sank. He realized that this time he really pissed off the neighbors.Immediately following his previous statement, this one made him sound like he was suspecting Alan of ripping off, or that he thought Alan was a shitty plumber.No matter what, the man in front of him was about to get angry.

Cam opened his mouth to try to redeem some of the damage, to take back what he had just said, or to explain it, or to apologize—whatever—but he couldn't find words of reassurance except to acknowledge the fact that he had nothing left.

Before Cam could say anything, Allen had already passed him and walked to the door. "Well, I hope you find someone who can cultivate," he said dryly. "Hopefully your pipes don't burst in the meantime. Snow is forecast for this week, you know."

Then he went out and strode to his van.

Cam watched him go, cursed inwardly, then sighed, closed the door, and turned to face his small, shabby, fucking depressing little house.

He needs a new boiler.

He needs a fucking fifteen hundred pounds.One thousand and five!

Omg.

Now he can barely pay the bills.In fact, he has a lot of travel and activity reservations for next year, but he has to stay until the end of April.The weeks that followed were long, cold, and fruitless.

Cam walked back to the living room, sighed and sat down on the old sofa.As always, every time he thought about his predicament, he felt his guts churning and his heart beat a little faster.It's a classic symptom of stress and anxiety, and he gets it.I also know how to take a deep breath and think in a positive direction.He's always worried a little too much - his brain can always make him think of the worst in two steps at once.But the problem is, he can't see the bright side at all.It was inevitable that there would be no financial income for the next four months.

When he started Crow Valley Adventures, he had hoped to have at least some activity bookings during the winter months—canoe, kayak, and bike racing any time of the year, and in the off-season he also big sale.He thought there would be a lot of vacationers who would like to spend weekends in different places and broaden their horizons.And then there are those companies from the city center who might want to do team building and charity projects, and maybe even business entertainment for the more adventurous business people.Cam used to work as an accountant for a large company, and he was involved in a lot of these team building, but it was a bit of a child's play for his personal fitness level.

①Crow Valley, namely GlenCroe, a famous scenic spot in Scotland, attracts outdoor adventurers and holds the "Restand Be Thankful" outdoor adventure competition with a long history every year.

That's why he decided to offer a lot of challenging projects at Crow Valley Adventures.He spent a lot of time researching and planning the itinerary, showing great details on the website and printing out flyers for local tourist information bureaus.The website has a lot of hits, and there is good business in summer, but there are no reservations in winter.It seems like he grossly underestimated how much the season affects the business.

Cam leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.He forced himself to take a few deep breaths, then rubbed his hands over his face, as if physical sensations could somehow force him back to this moment, even though his mind was still racing.

He wanted to open his laptop and go through the data sheets again to see where else the money could come from.The impulse was absurd—he had known for a long time that he would never get money anywhere.He is so familiar with his data that he can even recite it.Swallowing his saliva severely, he forced himself to sort out the cold and ruthless reality:

He's been doing it for a year, but the business is still losing money.

He has no source of income this winter.

He needs to repay the bank debt every month.

His severance pay was gone.

He has nothing left.

Next month, he has to pay off the debt with a credit card.

All of this was bad enough, but there was one more thing that made it all unbearable: His parents put their house up for him as a mortgage — not the one he never had. The small, shabby holiday cottage I've been coming to since I was six.No, they used their house as a guarantee, and they planned to downsize the house in a few years in order to free up the pension with little capital supplement.

That's what really makes Cam's stomach churn with fear.

Cam sat on the shabby sofa for a long time, staring at his knees, thinking in his mind, but in fact it was more like a racing car on a track, turning round and round to return to the same ruthless fact, the same fear and regret.

Finally, when the mobile phone rang, he raised his head, frowning, listening to the unfamiliar ringtone from the kitchen.It was a Christmas melody he knew well, and could remember its words:

"You'd better be careful; you'd better not cry...②"

②The lyrics come from the famous Christmas song "Santa Claus is Coming" (Santa Clausis Coming to Town).

It's Eli.

He jumped off the couch and walked straight to the phone buzzing on the kitchen chopping board.He grabbed the phone, slid the screen away with his thumb, and held it up to his ear.

"Eli," he snarled, "are you fucking fucking with my ringtone again?"

Ellie giggled like boiling a kettle. "Catched by you," she admitted, before continuing almost without a pause, "So guess what? I'm coming to see you today. Join me for lunch."

"Do not you have to work?"

"I'm on the evening shift today. I see—let's meet at that nice café in town. One o'clock?"

"If you're coming to see me, why don't you just come to me?"

"Going to your place for a cup of bad soup? No thanks. Besides, I try to eat a better lunch every time I have a late shift."

Ellie is a nurse in the emergency department, and she is overwhelmed with various alcohol-induced injuries during this time of year.

Cam paused before answering. "Got it, but, uh, do you mind if we don't go to that cafe?"

"Okay." Ellie sounded a little confused. "Is there any other good place to go?"

Cam thought desperately. "Tavern?" he suggested weakly.

"You mean 'The Stag'? They don't serve food, right?" Ellie sounded suspicious, and the last thing he needed now was for him to ask him why he didn't want to go to the cafe so much.

And he wasn't banned from the store anymore.At least not officially banned.

Besides, Rob Armstrong isn't there every day.Not even most of the time.Often it was the woman named War who was the shopkeeper.

"Oh yes, you're right - the Stag doesn't serve food," he forced himself to spit out the response cheerfully. "Okay, uh--then I'll meet you at the cafe. One, right?"

"Wonderful," Ellie sounded delighted. "By the way, I'm bringing your Christmas present."

"Oh, I can still get real presents now?" he said, trying to put a hint of humor in his voice.Ellie went to their parents' house for Christmas with a bunch of presents bought from a 24-hour gas station convenience store and wrapped in paper torn from the holiday edition of the Broadcast Times.Cam got a box of Milisole and a copy of the latest Attitude ③-he liked both, to be honest.

③ "Attitude", a famous British gay magazine.

"Of course!" Irri replied angrily. "Told you I had an idea, didn't I?"

"Hmm. That's why you came to see me on December 29th?"

"Certainly. Then—one o'clock, in the café."

"See you then," Cam confirmed.

He hung up the phone and stared at the phone.

He hoped Rob Armstrong wasn't in the store today—he didn't like being kicked out.Otherwise, Yili would really roast him.