farmer and fox

This year, He Xi spent a chaotic and peaceful winter.Something happened to his family, his father went to jail and his mother got sick, he lost his job and stayed at his younger brother's house with nothing to do every day.

Life seems to be at a low point, hopeless and unfortunate, but life is so peaceful that he has enough time to think about many things.For example, future plans, such as his relationship with Hu Li.

After the accident, the only friend who kept in touch with him was his best friend in college, Yaoyue.It's strange to say that he suddenly doesn't want to see those work partners, those who are joking and having fun on weekdays. I don't know if it's because he feels unhappy, so he doesn't dare to face those happy people anymore.

One month after the end of psychotherapy, the doctor suggested that he try to leave Hu Li and go out alone, take a walk in the park, visit the supermarket, press the road, whatever, just to let him adapt to the crowd.

Hu Li was worried, so he asked Yaoyue to accompany him, and the two went to the milk tea shop they used to go to in college. It was on the corner of the old city. After many years, nothing had changed.

Yaoyue was a very quiet person, he didn't talk much, ordered a drink according to the old rules, and then sat down with He Xi.

He Xi used to be a chatterbox and was responsible for enlivening the atmosphere, but now he suddenly became silent, which did not embarrass each other.

The room is very well heated, so you need to take off your coat and cold-proof and warm-keeping products. Yaoyue wears a lot for fear of the cold, and takes hats, gloves, and scarves one by one.

"Haven't thrown it away yet?" He Xi took a sip of hot cocoa and noticed his scarf, "I heard from Dongyang, who gave it to you in high school?"

Yaoyue was taken aback for a moment, looked down at the pure white scarf in her hand, and nodded embarrassingly: "I'm used to it."

"Yueyue." He Xi's eyes were loose, and he asked casually, "How long have you been?"

Yaoyue thought for a while: "It's almost ten years."

"I really admire you for persisting for so long." He Xi was confused, "How did you know that you like boys? Have you never liked girls before?"

"No." Yaoyue shook her head slightly, "I just fell in love with it all of a sudden, I don't know when, maybe it was when he snatched my schoolbag, maybe it was when he bought me breakfast, maybe it was when he gave me flowers, or It may be when winter is waiting for me at the school gate."

"Too much." Yaoyue smiled lightly, "Maybe every moment."

What I like is probably after many years, I found that I can recall all the details with that person, even including the color of the shirt he wore that day, and the posture of carrying his schoolbag.

"What does it feel like to like someone?" He Xi frowned. This question has been bothering him recently. "The goddess I fell in love with for the first time in junior high school. I thought she was beautiful and had personality. Later, I found out that she was dating Hu Li. I I was just angry, and then it seemed that I didn't like anyone anymore."

"Everyone is different." Yaoyue chewed the pearls in her mouth, and said vaguely, "But if you like someone, you will know it. But some people may not admit it."

"Don't admit it?" He Xi felt strange, "Why, what's wrong with admitting it?"

"Because this person may be a friend for many years, may be a friend of the same sex, may be someone who once hated, or may already have someone he likes. Sometimes people are very fragile and need to find reasons to convince themselves so that they will not be so sad." Yue glanced at He Xi, "That person could even be a relative or friend."

"Hey!" He Xi was a little furious, "Do you know something?"

"Before going out, Hu Li told me that you are together?" Yaoyue asked tentatively.

"Fuck off, I didn't agree!" He Xi was annoyed, "I don't know what happened that night, but I kissed him to comfort him."

"If it's not someone you like, why would you want to kiss him?" Yaoyue asked puzzled.

"We've been like this since we were young." He Xi swallowed, looking for a reason, "If he does something good, I'll reward him with a kiss."

"No, I think he likes you very much." Yaoyue affirmed, "The way he looks at you has never changed."

"That's why I'm upset." He Xi bowed his head, why didn't he understand, but, "He's my younger brother."

"I think..." Yaoyue bit the straw and whispered, "That's all an excuse, an excuse for you not daring to admit your feelings."

He Xi was taken aback for a moment, and looked at Yaoyue with wide eyes. His friend was obviously a cowardly person who messed up his feelings, but when it came to dealing with others, he was surprisingly sensitive, almost to the point.

He was just wondering why he was so entangled in his heart, why he felt both happy and sad after hearing Hu Li's confession.

If you take it apart, it is so obvious.

He is happy because Hu Li's liking is what he wants, the joy after getting it. His sadness is the brotherhood and social rules, which imprison the response he should have and the reaction he should have made.

He Xi suddenly felt that he was more cowardly than Yaoyue.

"You think I like him." He Xi asked.

"Yeah." Yaoyue nodded.

"That's why I was stupid." He Xi sighed, his thoughts gradually became clearer, he recalled what happened in the past few months, the things that were originally a mess that made him depressed and miserable, gradually became clearer.

"Something happened in my family." He Xi frowned, exposing the moldy darkness in her heart, "My dad killed himself, I can't figure it out, he is obviously a person who cherishes life very much, why would he do such a wrong thing."

"Actually, I can figure it out. I have figured it out a long time ago, because he was greedy for his utilitarianism and changed his original intention. I just pretended not to know about such a simple question."

"Because Hu Li was responsible for me from the beginning to the end. He helped me compensate, help me deal with the follow-up, and help me take responsibility." He Xi paused, "Because he loves me."

Yaoyue quietly faced the tree hole and didn't speak.

"I'm pretty useless. While enjoying his kindness, I don't recognize his feelings." He Xi shook her head and smiled bitterly, "I'm really not a good brother."

Yaoyue shook her head to comfort: "It's not your fault, you're just very confused, it takes time and process to recognize yourself."

"Yes." He Xi smiled, "So the fox has been waiting for me."

From when Hu Li told him that he had someone he liked in junior high school, to alienating each other because of a misunderstanding, to when He Xi entered high school and the two separated, and then to the strangeness after entering university, and the estrangement in society, it seems that he has always been moving forward between them. Go, Hu Li is chasing after him, and Hu Li doesn't seem to stop for a moment.

He suddenly realized that the man had been persisting, but he was just waiting for him to look back.

The evening glow is a bit beautiful, thick clouds cover the blue sky, it is sweet pink, elegant purple, and glorious orange.

He Xi chatted with Yaoyue a lot, until he said all the things he wanted to say but couldn't say in his heart, he felt relaxed, and felt that his soul was much lighter, and he had the potential to fly into the clouds and become a cloud.

As soon as the two got up, Hu Li called: "Brother, where are you? I just finished class and I'm going to pick you up."

"University City, Wenyuan North Road, the milk tea shop on the corner of the street." He Xi gave him the address.

"Wait for me for 5 minutes." Hu Li seemed to be on the way, with the sound of sirens around him.

"Come with me." He Xi hung up the phone and snatched Yaoyue's mobile phone that was about to hail a taxi, "They are all men with boyfriends, and they still take taxis by themselves."

Yaoyue was obedient, she smiled and said nothing.

Five minutes later, Hu Li's car drove up, and a girl sat in the back seat, and got out of the car with Hu Li.

"?" He Xi squinted her eyes with question marks all over her face.

"The school girl I met halfway is working part-time here, and I'm in a hurry, so I dropped her off on the way." Hu Li explained.

The elementary school girl's voice was waxy and she nodded her thanks: "Thank you Senior Hu, thank you very much."

"It's okay." Hu Li replied politely.

"What a coincidence." He Xi smiled, pulling Yaoyue into the car.

He habitually sat in the co-pilot, lost his temper, and closed the door with a "bang".

The junior girl standing outside opened her eyes wide. She pointed to the car and asked Hu Li in a low voice, "Didn't the senior say that the co-pilot is only reserved for one person?"

"That's right." Hu Li smiled and waved to her, and walked to the cab, "That's the man."

"Fuck!" The soft and cute junior girl suddenly burst out, she covered her mouth with her hand in disbelief, and excitedly said to Hu who had opened the car door, "Senior! I wish you happiness!"

Hu Li nodded to her and got into the car.

"You are very popular with women." After the car started, He Xi couldn't help but said, "Since childhood!"

"Brother, that girl just now." Hu Li said in a low voice with a smile, "I wish us happiness."

"You! How shameless you are!" He Xi was instantly ashamed, and reached out to cover his mouth, "What nonsense!"

He subconsciously looked in the rearview mirror, feeling very embarrassed to let Yaoyue hear this, but Yaoyue smiled at him generously, and blinked very rarely when he saw him looking over.

He Xi's mood suddenly became clear, it was a kind of open-mindedness.

He let go of his hand and pinched Hu Li's face as punishment: "What did you say to her? She wants to bless us."

"I didn't say anything." Hu Li turned his head to look at him secretly, "Maybe it's because my eyes on you are so hot that she noticed."

He likes to tease He Xi very much. Every time his brother loses his temper, he is so cute. He Xi blushes easily, but it is covered up by his irritability, but no matter what He Xi is, he likes it very much.

But this time, He Xi didn't get angry. He said calmly with a mood he had never felt before, "In the future, in this situation, don't let others guess."

"Just tell them the truth, we're in a relationship."

"Hiss", there was a screeching sound of brakes on the road, and a handsome black off-road vehicle stopped in the middle of the road without warning. The three people in the car were shocked. He Xi was frightened and wondered if this person was crazy !Don't die, dare to play like this!He was about to start swearing.

The man suddenly pressed over, covered his head and kissed him fiercely, his lips and teeth were entangled, he could only hear his own beating heartbeat, his whole body was weak and numb, he forgot everything in an instant, it was just an instinctive response, Because that's what he wanted to do too.

The two were on the street in the setting sun, suddenly parked in the car in the middle of the road, and kissed inseparably.

"That, what a pity?" Yaoyue was also very frightened. He just wanted to be a little transparent, but he couldn't think of the horns behind him one after another, so he could only stand up, "Hu Li? Let's drive the car away first, shall we? , it’s not good to park in the middle of the road.”

"I'm sorry." Hu Li was pushed away, licked the corner of his mouth, and started the car.

"It's okay." After a few seconds, Yaoyue couldn't help whispering, "I wish you happiness too."

"Ah!" He Xi was so ashamed, "Yueyue, don't say such things in such a serious way, okay?"

"Thank you." Hu Li said seriously.

Pedestrians are in a hurry on the street, and the commercial streets of the university city are just lit up, and there are groups of college students in groups, all of which are full of youthful and romantic atmosphere, but hidden under these blatant hustle and bustle, there are so many things that cannot be expressed, and how many hidden things are hidden. Love.

Who can give them the courage to confess their love to those they love?

Lively, silent, gaining, losing, loving, forgetting, no matter when and where, what year and month, whoever and what kind of love, any kind of love in this world should be blessed.