kiss you in the rain

8. Bitter coffee and sweet cake

Du Guangyan didn't know why he agreed to meet that person, but he was indeed standing in front of a coffee shop now, hesitating whether to go in.

Yan Ge's ex-boyfriend?That means that Yan Ge likes men, is he gay?Although Du Guangyan doesn't dislike being gay, after all, he has a gay who is in love with him, but Du Guangyan is surprised that Yan Ge once had a boyfriend.

"Doudou?" At this time, a deep voice came from behind, calling his name in the game. For a moment, Du Guangyan thought he had time traveled. When he turned around, he saw a young man who was slightly taller than himself. The man stood behind him. Seeing Du Guangyan looking back at him, the man introduced himself, "I'm Jin Yuge, Yu Jin."

"Ah, hello, I'm Du Guangyan." Du Guangyan was a little surprised, because in his imagination, Yu Jin was a mature and stable person wearing a suit and tie, while the person in front of him looked like an ordinary person wearing a short T.

"Go in." Yu Jin walked past Du Guangyan and opened the door for Du Guangyan, indicating that he could go in, so Du Guangyan walked in nervously with his fists clenched.

"What to drink? You're welcome." Yu Jin walked to the ordering counter and looked back at Du Guangyan. Du Guangyan glanced at the menu and said, "Lemonade is fine. I don't like coffee very much."

"Understood, you can find a seat first." Just after speaking, Yu Jin suddenly thought of something and added: "It's better to be quiet."

"Secluded..." Du Guangyan muttered in a low voice, then turned around to look for a seat, but he found that there were not many customers in this store, that is, the seats were chosen randomly. "Then take a corner."

Then Du Guangyan walked to a round table against the wall and sat down. After sitting down, he couldn't help turning his head to look at Yu Jin. At this time, what he thought in his head was: "He is Yan Ge who once loved people?"

So it means that the two of them will hold hands, hug, kiss, and entangle with each other?

Du Guangyan didn't think about it anymore, because he felt that he would become very strange if he continued to think like this. At this time, Yu Jin ordered a good meal and came to Du Guangyan.

"Don't you want to eat something?" Yu Jin sat opposite Du Guangyan, not shy at all when meeting a stranger for the first time.

Du Guangyan shook his head and said, "I'm quite full at noon, so I won't be hungry now."

Yu Jin nodded with a smile to express his understanding, and then he said, "I won't beat around the bush, let's get straight to the point."

"I'm Yan Ge's high school classmate, but in a different class. I was with him in the second year of high school, and we broke up before the college entrance examination. Now it's just a very ordinary friendship. You don't have to worry about anything."

"Eh? Worried? What am I worried about..." Du Guangyan didn't know what Yu Jin meant by worrying, so he asked.

"I just set aside my relationship with Yan Ge first to save unnecessary misunderstandings in the future, and then I came to you today to talk to you about you and Yan Ge."

"Me and Yan Ge?" Du Guangyan was even more at a loss.

"What do you know about homosexuality?"

"..." Yu Jin's question was either incomprehensible or unable to answer. Du Guangyan was speechless for a moment. Disgusting unbearable?"

"That's not true. To be honest, there are such people around me, er, so I don't think it's okay." Du Guangyan thought that Yu Jin didn't know Xu Ning anyway, so let's just say it. Another reason is that he I want to know about Yan Ge's past, so I want to take this opportunity to shorten the distance with him.

Yu Jin looked very surprised when he heard this. He couldn't help but start to look at Du Guangyan, and found that there was nothing special about Du Guangyan. He was just an ordinary student. Maybe it was because of his expression or his eyes that moved him at a certain moment. Yan Ge, Yu Jin thought about it and said, "Hey, that's quite surprising. By the way, how tall are you...?"

"The third year of high school begins."

"Oh~ it's a very crucial year." Yu Jin said meaningfully: "Usually, I am a senior who is older than you? It can be said that I should discourage you from concentrating on your studies, but..."

"If you are the one who can pull Yan Ge up, then I am willing to give you a push."

"Pull it up?" Du Guangyan asked puzzled.

"Do you know why we broke up?" Du Guangyan looked at Yu Jin's eyes and shook his head, when their order came, Yu Jin thanked the waiter, then looked at the coffee and cake in front of him and said: "I and Yan Ge unexpectedly likes to eat sweets very much, although we are both men, don't you think this is strange?"

Du Guangyan took a sip of lemonade and shook his head, so Yu Jin continued: "But Yan Ge's world is as bitter as coffee, and I am the one who brought him this taste."

For some reason, Du Guangyan's heart suddenly tightened when he heard this, and something was about to move.

"It was I who broke up first, and the reason was that I was afraid of confessing and exposing our relationship to relatives or friends. I was afraid of worldly eyes and speech, so I chose to escape."

"Yan Ge didn't care about other people's feelings as carefully as he does now. He used to be a person who didn't know how to care. He thought that as long as people lived in the present, he didn't have to think about the future before it came. , so at that time he only wanted to be with me, he felt that as long as he was with me, everything else was not important, so he never considered that our relationship that has not been accepted by the world will bring us what a disaster."

"Since I started thinking about this matter, I have become uneasy. As long as there are people, I dare not hold hands with him, and I dare not have too intimate behaviors with him. He once told me about this matter. I quarreled, but later I took the initiative to admit my mistakes, I know he really loves me, he gave me too much love and at the same time too heavy, and these loves are not enough to support our future."

"When Yan Ge was in junior high school, he found that he couldn't fall in love with girls, but he didn't understand at that time. He didn't know that he liked the same sex until the summer vacation of the third year of junior high school. And I, I am not gay, I was not gay before, and I am not now, I just simply like Yan Ge, that's all I've loved him."

When Yu Jin said this, he lowered his eyes and looked at the undrinked coffee in front of him. After being stunned for a while, he raised his cup and took a sip. Then he put down the cup and met Du Guangyan's gaze and said with a smile: "Do you think the message The amount is too large and needs to be digested?"

"Ah, no, I listened too engrossed..." Du Guangyan's mood is very complicated now, his heart is complicated and entangled, he has never thought that Yan Ge has such a past, nor has he thought about the present. Yu Jin and Yan Ge used to love each other deeply but finally lost...to the fear of the future that has yet to come.

"It was raining heavily on the day Yan Ge and I proposed to break up. Yan Ge came to my house in the rain and asked me why I said we broke up. He asked me if you hated me, did you like someone else? Did he do something wrong? He looks terrible. I have never seen Yan Ge so anxious and overwhelmed. To be honest, I was a little happy in my heart at that time, because that said Yan Ge I care about me, but I keep telling myself not to soften my heart, and I must completely end this relationship."

"But I didn't control my emotions well. I yelled at Yan Ge. I blamed him for never thinking about what we would do in the future. How should we explain our relationship to our parents who still can't accept this kind of thing? I questioned him always When it comes to time and time, there will be a way, so when is the time, I told him that you never think about it because you just keep escaping."

"But in fact, I was the one who chose to escape in the end. After I lost my temper with Yan Ge, Yan Ge said sorry to me. I was too selfish. Ha... Actually, I am not afraid of your jokes. I really had a hand at that time." The impulse to hug Yan Ge and tell him I was wrong and we will not break up is the first time...the first time I saw Yan Ge's weakness."

"But, I won't do that, and then we broke up. Before Yan Ge left, I asked him if we could still be friends in the future. Guess how Yan Ge answered?"

"...Leave directly?" Du Guangyan didn't know the answer, so he guessed one at random.

"Hahahaha is also like his style, but it's not. He turned his back to me and said to me that we are buddies." Yu Jin smiled and used the small fork in front of him to fork a small piece of cake and put it into his mouth Li, chewed carefully and said: "However, we haven't talked since then. After graduating from high school, we were admitted to universities far apart. Although we have contacted each other on WeChat during the university, there are only a handful of them. , and during this period we haven't met once, until he asked me to help him fight a PK a few days ago."

"To be honest, I was very surprised when he came to me. I didn't know what kind of attitude I should use to face him. We haven't seen each other for a long time. We haven't met once in four years, but let him There are only two possibilities for offering to see me four years later, either he has come out of the shadow of the past and has a new love or he is still attached to me, but the possibility of the latter is very slim.”

"Yan Ge was afraid to see me, because he felt that he hurt me, so since that incident, he has become trembling, especially caring about other people's eyes, even though he still looks cheerful and lively on the surface, but in fact Deep down I've become very afraid of having a deeper relationship with people."

"But haven't you met each other once? How do you know this?" Du Guangyan couldn't help blurting out his doubts when he heard that. After he finished speaking, he realized that he had said it, so he quickly covered his mouth, but Yu Jin laughed. He shook his hand and said: "I was a little worried about him when I was a freshman and sophomore. It happened that I had a friend who was admitted to the same university as him, so I asked him to help me observe Yan Ge for me. He's doing well and has a good personality, and he's very popular in college, so it's easy to inquire about him."

"With... a stalker? Ah sorry, I didn't mean to... just want to complain."

"Hahahahaha it's okay, I really felt like a stalker at that time." Yu Jin ate another piece of cake, and then continued: "In short, Yan Ge has changed, and later I also noticed it from his social dynamics. He used to post all the happy and angry things on the Internet, but now he updates one in a few days, sometimes not even in a month."

"Then you haven't thought about contacting him?" When Du Guangyan heard the current story, he began to feel that the two people in front of him were such a good match, but he was always just a listener to the story about these two people, and he was not the protagonist of the story. .

Yu Jin stared at the coffee cup in his hand, shook his head lightly and said: "I can't go to him, it will make Yan Ge more afraid, and his condition will be worse, Yan Ge needs a brand new one. Someone completely unknown to him is coming to guide him out of the shadows of his past, but that person will never be me."

"Then Yan Ge finally met this person, and this person is sitting in front of my eyes now."

"Me?" Du Guangyan pointed to his chest in a daze, and Yu Jin nodded, "Well, it's you."

"Why me? Yan Ge and I have only known each other for about half a month?"

"I don't know about this. I have to ask Yan Ge himself for details, but what I can be sure of is that Yan Ge didn't reject you but took the initiative to approach you. This is the best proof." Yu Jin drank the last sip of coffee , took a deep breath and stared at Du Guangyan's eyes and asked, "Tell me, do you feel sick when you hear this?"

"what?"

"It's the fact that Yan Ge is addicted to you."

"Indulgence... is it too exaggerated?"

"Exaggeration? That kid can't figure out what the pain is now. I'm still saying it euphemistically."

Du Guangyan opened his mouth but didn't know what to say. To be honest, the amount of information in this moment was too much. He couldn't even remember how the topic jumped from the story of Yu Jin and Yan Ge to himself. It's not the protagonist of the story, why is he involved?

This made him, a bystander, completely at a loss as to how to react. The audience who had been silently eating melons was suddenly spotlighted on top of their heads, and the microphone stand stood in front of him, waiting for him to say a word.

"I... I don't know, I don't know about this kind of thing..." Du Guangyan hugged the lemonade cup tightly, and squeezed the plastic cup to make a "click" sound. Seeing this, Yu Jin said: " Let me put it another way, have you ever liked anyone?"

"Yes, but that was junior high school..." However, Du Guangyan was interrupted by Yu Jin before he finished speaking: "Then you think back to how you felt at that time, and then think back to everything you have encountered since you met Yan Ge And how you feel right now.”

"Is there anything that can overlap?"

Du Guangyan shook his head while thinking, "I don't know..."

"Ah, why are you so not frank? I heard that you are a very frank person." Yu Jin raised his forehead, but he had no choice but to ask straight to the point: "So do you hate Yan Ge?"

"it's OK."

"Do you like him then?"

"do not know……"

"Then what do you think of Yan Ge?"

"Ah...it's pretty good, it's very humorous but also feels very reliable."

"Does that mean there is a possibility of falling in love with it?"

"..."

Yu Jin looked at Du Guangyan's demeanor of asking three questions, and sighed in his heart, so he thought it was better to use that method.

"Oh, by the way, I passed by his supermarket and I heard from his mother that Yan Ge seemed to have a fever yesterday, and it seemed to be quite serious." Yu Jin ignored Du Guangyan's reaction intentionally or unintentionally, and said word by word: "Yan Ge is very serious." It's rare to get sick, this guy rarely even catches a cold, and he suddenly had a fever, I don't know how he is doing."

"Has he had a fever?" Du Guangyan asked subconsciously and nervously when he heard that Yan Ge had a fever. This reaction made the corner of Yu Jin's mouth raise an imperceptible smile, and Du Guangyan continued: "Then why don't you go and see?" he?"

"I think he doesn't want to show me his weakness again, and I think there are better candidates than me now." Yu Jin raised his eyes and glanced at Du Guangyan who was flustered, and then the next second He lowered his gaze to the half cake, but he didn't eat it.

"Go and see him for me? Just as my reward for buying you lemonade?" Yu Jin leaned back and looked at Du Guangyan, who had already given the answer, and smiled softly.

Later, Yu Jin said something about Yan Ge. After Du Guangyan left, Yu Jin sat in his seat for 10 minutes before leaving. When he left, the bitter coffee was gone, and half of the sweet cake was left piece, but the half piece happens to be the most creamy and sweetest part.