don't pass time

In the blink of an eye, it was mid-June, and the exam week was approaching. The students in Lu Yuan's class were planning to spend a lot of energy before they could calm down and face the end of the semester, so the annual gathering was scheduled for Saturday.Xu Yao, the monitor of the class, rented out a small movie theater and planned to go to the movies after dinner.

The night before the party, Lu Yuan woke up from a dream in the middle of the night. He tossed and turned in bed unable to fall asleep, so he got up to find water to drink, and walked out of the bedroom, only to find a light leaking from under the door of Yan Lang's room.He remembered that Xu Yao had told him that he had also invited Yan Lang, and after hesitating for two seconds, he walked over and stood in front of Yan Lang's door.

Since the last time Yan Lang went out drunk and came back, although the class and life are still going on as usual, Yan Lang is still the gentle teacher Yan, but Lu Yuan always feels that there is something wrong with him, as if there is another curtain between him and him The curtain can't be opened no matter what.

He shook his head suddenly, as if he was about to throw something out of his mind, knocked lightly on the door, but there was no answer, knocked twice more, still no response.Lu Yuan put his ear to the door in a slightly wretched manner, but didn't hear a sound.

He scratched his head, thinking that Yan Lang forgot to turn off the lights and fell asleep, turned around and was about to leave, but he heard Yan Lang's voice, a little low: "What's wrong?"

Lu Yuan turned around and faced the door, and said, "Teacher, tomorrow we will have dinner in class, and the monitor said that you have stayed with our class for so long, and asked you to go...to?"

There was no sound from the door again, just when Lu Yuan thought he would not wait for a reply, he said loudly: "I have something to do, so I won't go."

"Oh... how about watching a movie tonight?"

Lu Yuan quickly waited for a reply this time: "I probably won't be able to go either."

I don't know what's going on in my heart, and I suddenly feel a little lost, but in terms of Yan Lang's style of life and work, it's not normal to go there.Lu Yuan adhered to the principle of thinking too much but not too high, and always stopped the car when he was deep in his heart, so he said: "Oh... good night."

Lu Yuan went back to his room and lay on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. He couldn't see anything clearly, but he still tried his best to open his eyes, as if to confirm where he was.In the second half of the night, I finally fell asleep in a trance, but it was full of jumping dreams.

In the dream, Lu Yuan sometimes seems to be chasing Yan Lang, and sometimes he doesn't know why he is in a foreign land.Countless chaotic and inexplicable scenes flipped quickly, and Lu Yuan suddenly stood in front of a high gazebo, all he could see was the greenery on the top of the mountain, and turned his back to Yan Lang who was standing by the railing. Glancing at him, the eyes are not only the usual gentleness, but also full of gentle compassion and understanding.This is the clearest picture in the dream all night, Lu Yuan's heart froze when he looked at the eyes.The alarm clock goes off.

Lu Yuan couldn't express his feelings clearly, he was a little disappointed and a little lucky.The whole meal at the dinner party was tasteless. Although he usually doesn't get along well with people, he is happy in the crowd and sits alone in the corner, watching his classmates laughing loudly, giving him the illusion that he is outside the world.He felt in a daze that he was a bystander, and he was not qualified to enter anyone's life, including Yan Lang, who he thought he was very close to.

In the movie theater, the classmates who made good friends were all sitting together. Lu Yuan was planning to sit in the row on the right by the door with some classmates who were a little familiar Talking about how many people should move back a row, Lu Yuan raised a heartless smile as usual: "It's okay, you sit here."

Then a person walked to the back row and sat on the side of the middle aisle.

The movie was about to end, and those love stories were not Lu Yuan's favorite subjects, but they made the sentimental girls in the class sobbing in the second half.On the screen, the male and female protagonists embrace each other in the storm, the picture is beautiful, Lu Yuan thought.But that's all there is to it.Not knowing what kind of mood he was in or just unintentional, Lu Yuan looked to the right and found that Yan Lang had come here at some point, and he happened to be sitting at the door of his row, with a whole row of empty seats between them.

Obviously there is no one, but it looks like the Milky Way.Later, when Lu Yuan recalled this scene, he thought so.

At that moment, Lu Yuan was still calm, the door was not closed tightly, and a beam of light came in, and Lu Yuan saw many light and flying dust in the light.Yan Lang's quiet side face was shrouded in the light, he raised his head and looked at the curtain seriously, Lu Yuan saw the corner of his mouth curved upwards.

How can my heart be so full, it hurts a little.

Lu Yuan turned his head and looked at the long lens on the curtain, and laughed quietly.

After the movie was shown, everyone left in twos and threes, but Lu Yuan didn't see Yan Lang, and couldn't help but suspect that the Yan Lang he saw just now was his own illusion.Some students made an appointment to go to KTV, and some planned to go to the water bar. When Xu Yao passed by him, she greeted him and planned to ask his opinion, but he said casually: "Be careful on the road."

When everyone had dispersed, when Lu Yuan was left alone at the entrance of the cinema and looked around blankly, his phone vibrated and he received a text message: "The parking lot on the first floor is waiting for you."

He smiled, stuffed his phone back into his trouser pocket, and strode towards the parking lot. After two steps, he started running.

Lu Yuan didn't know why he wanted to see Yan Lang so desperately, maybe it was to prove that the smile he saw just now was not an illusion, and further prove that the appearance of Yan Lang in his life was also not an illusion, even though Yan Lang was always the one he saw. An impenetrable fan.Now he wants to hug Yanlang with a feeling of gratitude, even if we will part ways one day, he still wants to thank him for actually entering his life.

When Lu Yuan walked into the basement, his smile was bright, with a flamboyant youthful air, Yan Lang couldn't help being stunned for a moment.When he walked over and got into the car, he couldn't help but ask, "What's so happy about it?"

Lu Yuan replied loudly: "It's exam week soon!"

Yan Lang smiled: "Is it a holiday because the exam week is over?"

Lu Yuan: "No!"

Yan Lang raised one eyebrow to express his confusion, Lu Yuan smiled: "Do you need any reason to be happy?"

He finished his speech and shook his head, he could always be choked by Lu Yuan, because Lu Yuan's logic in dealing with things most of the time was: Does this need any reason?

So he also smiled, stopped talking, started the car and left.

The car drove for a quarter of an hour or so before realizing that the route was wrong. Based on the principle of proximity, Xu Yaoding's movie theater is actually not far from the school. Even if Yan Lang's house is on the other side of the school, he should have arrived long ago.So he glanced sideways and realized that he was walking on an unusual path.

The wind didn't stop in the evening of June, and he inexplicably felt that there were some long-term memories coming towards him, he couldn't hear the words clearly, and couldn't see the expression clearly, only the emotions from nowhere came over his heart, all with old feelings of emotion.In such an inexplicable emotion, the joy that had just been raised was hidden, and Lu Yuan's voice slowed down a bit: "Aren't you going home?"

Yan Lang pretended to be mysterious and smiled: "Take you somewhere."

This is the most ordinary day in June, there is wind in the evening, and it is rare to see stars in Yucheng. Lu Yuan is inexplicably sad and happy, and finally there is a peaceful state of mind, but that peace has an old meaning.Looking back a long time later, he felt that kind of state of mind, to use a word that was used so much by later generations and became a bit hypocritical, but still powerful and poetic, was called desolation.

At that time, the young Lu Yuan hadn't experienced too many ups and downs in life, even though his life had too many dark places that others could not see.It's just a lonely growth process, a faint witness to the inevitable death process, and a sudden closeness and care, but it is enough for a teenager to start to transform in a certain moment.

Is growth related to any specific event?Maybe, for some people it is like this, but for some people, growing up is just a momentary thing, a turbulent wave in the heart, or a superficial touch.Realizing the vastness of life and the universe, at that moment, the change only happens in the heart.

When Lu Yuan examines the past, he often suspects that day was a dream, just like most of the memories and experiences in his life, they are all fake, because they are too beautiful, so they are fake.He didn't dare to tell the difference, but forced himself to recall the proof over and over again, proving that everything existed, but unfortunately he couldn't even figure out whether he really existed.

Yan Lang took him up to the highest mountain in Yucheng. Standing in the gazebo on the top of the mountain, he could overlook most of Yucheng. In front of his eyes were the lights of thousands of houses. It was so beautiful that it was unreal, but the top of the mountain was pitch black with only the wind.With the starry sky above his head and the world beneath his feet, Lu Yuan heard Yan Lang say, "Happy birthday!"

Lu Yuan was stunned. In fact, he didn't remember that this day was his birthday. He almost never celebrated his birthday when his grandfather was around. It seemed that the Lu family didn't care much about it, and he never deliberately remembered it. .Hearing what Yan Lang said, he checked carefully in his heart, and found that it was really his birthday. After thinking for a while, he remembered that he would be twenty years old from today.

He didn't know what to say for a while, so he stood there without moving, and said loudly, "Unhappy?"

"No, no, very happy." Lu Yuan showed a characteristic smirk, "It's just that I didn't realize it was my birthday, so I was shocked!"

Yan Lang thought this child was so cute, and wanted to press his head into his arms and rub it well, but he couldn't let go of his reserve, so he smiled: "After thinking about it for a long time, I don't know what to give. The wind sends you."

Have you thought about it for a long time...?Lu Yuan was stunned for a moment, then laughed even more happily.

Later, the two stood side by side on the top of the mountain, each silent.Feeling the wind, Lu Yuan suddenly entered his heart with the words "Nian Tiandi Zhiyouyou", his nose was sore, and he didn't come to think, this is Chen Ziang's mood, right?Yes, it is Chen Ziang's mood. It turns out that from ancient times to the present, people's feelings about the sky and the wind are interlinked.I can't express it myself, but in fact, the same feelings have been written by the ancients long ago.

Lu Yuan, who thinks he has no literary talents, deeply sensed a kind of joy at this moment. He felt lonely at the same time, as if he couldn't touch anything when he stretched out his hand, so he simply gave up extending his hand, even if Yan Lang could Stand next to yourself.Because there are always places that words and words cannot touch, because the "independence" at the time of "sorrowful and tearful" is the existence that disappears in an instant like the wind, disappears and is eternal.

The author has something to say:

I wish everyone happy!