Young Sovereign, he wants to die every day

"Young Master Yan." The voice sounded again.

But Yan Xubai didn't dare to turn his head back, nor did he dare to respond.This is obviously a very familiar voice, didn't he come here just to find this person?

"Don't worry, there is no one else here."

Hearing the voice getting closer and closer to him, Yan Xubai almost trembled, the jasper-colored porcelain bottle in his hand was tightly squeezed, and even a little sweat broke out in his palm.

The footsteps seemed to stop three feet away from him, "If you are afraid, pick up your sword."

sword?

Yan Xubai lowered his head, and found that the porcelain vase that he was holding in his hand had turned into a long sword. The blade was slender and dark green, and there was still an aura glowing under the blade.

Is this worry-free?Yan Xubai was puzzled, at this time he should only have Wuyou.

"This is not worry-free, nor is it breaking the mountain." The man's voice continued, he sighed, and said, "Look at me, I didn't come to hurt you."

Yan Xubai still didn't dare to look back.The worry in my heart appeared inexplicably, but this feeling seemed to have been experienced many times before.

"I don't want it." Yan Xubai replied, his voice was small and slightly crying, as if he felt the fear welling up from the bottom of his heart.

"No one will hurt you again."

Yan Xubai questioned, with a trembling voice, "You... who are you, and how do you know."

"If you have been so afraid, you will never get well. I promised to treat you, but you still have this kind of knot in the end." The man said softly, "I thought, as long as I stay in your spiritual consciousness forever, you will be fine." You can keep your mind forever."

"It's wishful thinking after all." The man laughed at himself, "But, let you go through it again, is it too cruel for you?"

Yan Xubai couldn't understand. Apart from fear, all he had left was doubts, "What the hell are you talking about? Are you my husband? Why do I think you are not."

Speaking of this, Yan Xubai suddenly felt a pain in his abdomen. He lowered his head to look, only to find that his abdomen clothes had been stained with blood at some point, and the excess blood had gathered into a small puddle at his feet.

He was a little unbelievable, why did this happen, why did he get hurt here?Obviously no one attacked him.

"Ayu, I don't have time." The man's voice sounded again, along with his footsteps.

"Don't! Don't! Go away!" Yan Xubai waved the sword indiscriminately. Although his abdomen hurts, it doesn't seem to affect his movements. It seems to be the most common flesh injury.

"Ayu, this is the last chance. If it doesn't work...I...I don't know what to do." The man's voice was low, as if he was facing life and death, "Since you don't want to, let me do it."

The sound of footsteps came from far and near, and the sound of the last step was just around the corner.This man came in front of Yan Xubai, the hand holding the long sword was restrained, and he lowered his head.

Even if he couldn't move anymore, he didn't dare to look at the person in front of him.

The man raised Yan Xubai's hand holding the sword, and put the blade on his neck. He looked at Yan Xubai, and saw that his body was weak and his skin was transparent, as fragile as the wings of a golden cicada.

"You...what are you going to do?" Yan Xubai raised his head, and the first thing he saw was a pair of peach blossom eyes, which were filled with affection and the sadness of parting.

"You regretted not doing this at the time, but if you do it today, you will untangle your heart." The man held Yan Xubai's hand, and slowly exerted force, until there was blood on his neck along the blade, dripping onto the ground drop by drop , and merged with the original blood puddles.

"Don't...don't..." Yan Xubai refused, but he couldn't stop what he was doing.

"Don't be afraid... nothing like this will happen again." The man said with a smile, holding Yan Xubai's hand again, and exerted a little more force on the sword, "You must live well."

Yan Xubai wanted to let go of the sword, but tried many times but failed, he didn't want to.

He never thought of doing this. Although he was anxious at the time, the last thing he wanted to face in his life was that night. He didn't believe that his husband would treat him like this.

He watched the man in front of him gradually become transparent, just like the Yunxiu he had seen before, lying in his arms to lose his soul.

"Ayu, so, I also forget my wish."

"Sir! I don't want to do this." Yan Xubai felt extremely sad in his heart, but in such an emotion, he threw away the sword in his hand and quickly stroked the wound on the man's neck with his hands. "Fu Guilan, how can you make such a good decision!" He was already crying, not in a hidden voice, but directly, "How can you do this...how can you!"

But the man in front of him is still like this, gradually becoming transparent, gradually turning into starlight, and gradually dissipating.

"Don't—! I don't want you to go! I want you to stay in Yanmen forever! Be with me forever!" Yan Xubai cried and said to him.

However, there is no way.

With the sun gradually rising in the distance, Yan Xubai found that the person he wanted to hug had completely disappeared at this moment, without even a trace of existence.

"I do not want..."

"I just want you to come back..."

"Why do you want to leave me here alone. I still have something to say to you, how can you do this!"

Yan Xubai knelt on the ground with his head bowed, tears flowed from his eyes and dripped onto the back of his hands.

The sun is clearly rising, the golden light is dazzling, and everything is full of vitality, but only Yan Xubai is crying sadly, and his heart aches like being torn apart.

"Don't...I don't want to..."

"I don't want it!" The man at the desk suddenly woke up, his chest throbbing and vibrating, as if his heart would jump out in the next second.

"Is it a dream...?" Yan Xubai felt that his eyes were blurred, he raised his hand to wipe the corners of his eyes, and the hot and humid tears were sucked away by his sleeves.The rising sun in summer was dazzling but warm. He squinted his eyes and looked into the distance. This was the same morning as in his dream.

However, this feeling is too bad.

The pain on the back of his neck reminded Yan Xubai that he fell asleep at his desk last night, obviously utterly refusing to fall asleep, but suddenly fell into a dream.The pain in his heart was so real that Yan Xubai even thought this dream was real.

The dragon-patterned wreath on his chest was slowly glowing, which meant that he had moved his mind again, but the seal hadn't been triggered. If it had been in the past, he might have been overwhelmed by the pain.

Yan Xubai was worried, so he took two deep breaths to calm down his beating heart.He got up and walked around the terrace a few times, only to realize that it was still early.The days in summer are long, and the sunrise is early. At this time, it is just after the beginning of Mao, but the sun has already appeared from the stratus clouds, and it can't wait to shine on the earth.

The books on the table were messy, on the reclining chair there was a small blanket that was covered last night, and the half-turned book was lying quietly on the round stool beside it.The vines on the sloping shed have grown a lot, and can almost shade them all.

He walked back to the table, picked up the letterhead that Fu Guilan sent yesterday, and read it again.

Need to linger for a few more days...

He muttered it again, but Yan Xubai was still uneasy.He found the letter paper, picked up a pen and quickly wrote a few lines, then turned into a talisman bird and sent him away.

He sat at the table, anxiously waiting for a reply, but he didn't come after waiting for an hour, his fingers kept tapping on the table.There is no way for Yan Xubai to distract himself from the script on the table, the affairs of the clan, and the contacts between clans.

Haven't woken up yet?Or did the talisman bird not arrive?

When he was anxious and confused, a familiar light was caught by him. He didn't wait for the little talisman bird to fall down leisurely, but raised his hand and spun the air blade to quickly bring it to his eyes.

Spread the letter quickly.

"Ah Yu don't need to worry, it's just a nightmare. I'm still in the dojo, don't worry about it."

A few words are indeed his notes.Yan Xubai felt much calmer in his heart.

A few more days passed, about five or six days.After the nightmare that day, although he felt a little worried, but because he had received the letter as a form of stability, and there were a lot of things going on in the Yan Clan, it would be fine if he got busy, as long as he didn't have time to think wildly.

Whenever I was worried, I would think that he had written in the letter "Need to hang around for a few days." If I asked every day, wouldn't it make people feel that I was really too daughter-in-law.Therefore, Yan Xubai endured it and buried himself in books and mountains and seas every day.

There are many affairs, but I still think about it occasionally.Yan Xubai began to accept this dream, and even thought, what if he is really gone?

No, it's impossible not to be there.

Immediately interrupt your own thoughts.

Make guesses, and then stop random thinking.After such a process, back and forth, repeated many times, he gradually attributed his uneasiness to this dream.

It seems that it is much better.

Could it be that without Fu Guilan, he can live a good life without being sad?The idea was too dangerous and was rejected again.

Early in the morning, Yan Xubai came out of the house, ready to urge his disciples to have a morning class, but he saw Yan Minghuai led Xiaobai into Xiantanzhu.

"Did you get well so soon?" Yan Xubai stepped forward, stretched out his hand and scratched Xiaobai's head, the clump of little yellow hair seemed to have grown a lot now, almost covering his eyes.

Yan Minghuai untied the rein around Xiaobai's neck, and said: "Don't worry, my aunt has been raising her carefully for nearly a decade, brother, don't you think he is getting fatter?"

Yan Xubai walked around Xiaobai, looked it up, and it seemed that he really gained a lot of weight.

As soon as he was let go of the rein, Xiaobai returned to a familiar place, and immediately flung himself about in the courtyard, jumping around beside Yan Xubai.Seeing its appearance like this, Yan Xubai also felt light in his heart.

"Brother, are you going to the Disciple Hall?"

"Correct."

"Then I'll be with you."

The two went out of the Moon Gate Cave, chatting all the way, and arrived in a short while.The disciples' morning class also started, and Yan Xu came to urge him day in and day out, so these teenage disciples practiced more attentively than before.

After staying for more than an hour, Yan Xubai thought that he could go back to deal with his affairs, so he told Ming Huai to let him continue to take care of the students' studies.Yan Minghuai responded, and he also walked away gently, so as not to surprise the disciples who had entered meditation.

Back in Xiantanzhu, Yan Xubai saw that Xiaobai had gnawed the newly prosperous flower garden half bald, he stepped forward to pat it on the head, and said to himself: "He has been away for more than ten days, Xiaobai also wants to go to the dojo to see him, right?"

Xiaobai chewed the grass, looked sideways at Yan Xubai, and gurgled.

Yan Xubai got on his horse, and instead of leaving from the Yanmen Mountain Gate, he went directly into the air, crossing the barrier of Longsuo Mountain and heading directly towards Luoyang.

There was a whistling wind in his ears, but Yan Xubai's heart was calm, and he didn't panic at all. He seemed as calm as he usually went to inspect the affiliated sect.

After more than half an hour, Yan Xubai saw the rolling mountains and recognized that Luoyang was nearby. He patted Xiaobai's neck again and said, "Hurry up."

Xiaobai let out a long cry, stepped on the clouds and flew, and arrived in a short while.

Yan Xubai put Xiaobai away, crossed the foot of the mountain for investigation, then went up the mountain along the mountain road, passed a barrier to protect the mountain, and finally arrived at the entrance of the dojo.He saw a dozen or so disciples gathered in Jianping not far away, thinking that they were probably going out for training or wandering.

It just so happened that there was an acquaintance among the disciples guarding the entrance of the dojo.

"Sect Leader Yan, why are you here?" The young man's complexion was still good, it seemed that the incident a month ago did not hurt him, or that the Taoist's body-protecting techniques could make people recover well.

Yan Xubai smiled, and said, "I'm here to find Mr. Fu. Also... pay a visit to Sovereign Han."

Qi Lian said: "Master has been away from the mountain for many days. But Sect Master Han is here, so he should be in Mingtang at this moment. If Sect Master Yan is willing, I can take you there."

Hearing the answer, Yan Xubai was taken aback for a moment, but immediately hid his astonishment and said, "That's very good."

Seeing Yan Xubai's reaction, Qi Lian felt puzzled in his heart, thinking that his master and Yan Zongzhu had a very close relationship, why Yan Zongzhu didn't know about Li Shan.

But he didn't intend to ask more, because Fu Guilan also told him before leaving that if Sect Master Yan came to ask, he said he didn't know, and only said Li Shan.

Both Qi Lian and Yan Xubai are people who don't talk much, so on the way to Mingtang, the two of them rarely asked or answered.

Yan Xubai entered the Mingtang courtyard, and saw many Taoist elders coming out of the hall, Qi Lian beside him said: "Today, the suzerain is discussing matters with the elders."

Yan Xubai nodded, planning to wait in the courtyard until Han Feizhou came out.After standing for a while, he found that Qi Lian behind him didn't intend to leave, so he said, "I'll just wait here by myself, if you have something to do, go and do it." He said, his tone was like treating Ming It's normal, and there is no alienation.

Qi Lian also seems to be very used to it, probably because of the feeling he developed during the few days in Yanmen.He bowed and left the courtyard without saying a word.

Yan Xubai stood under the tree, feeling a little uneasy.Seeing that the sun was getting brighter and the surrounding area was getting hotter, but his palms were cool. Although his palms were sweating a little, it wasn't because of the sun at all.

Two more people dressed as elders came out from the hall, after the two walked out of the courtyard and disappeared from the mountain path, Yan Xubai saw an old figure, pushed back the curtain, and walked out slowly.His face has not changed, it is still in the state of green pines and cypresses, and the majesty between his brows and eyes has not diminished in the slightest.

"Sect Master Han."

Yan Xubai yelled and walked towards Han Feizhou.

People who get along with him every day may not be able to see it, but Yan Xubai can see the sadness in his eyes.