make do

The caller is Mu Qing.

It had been a long time since Yan Chen heard his cell phone ring, and he was still a little dazed for a while.

After the call was connected, Mu Qing's tone was still familiar, and she probably asked Yan Chen what he was doing recently and his plans after retiring from the circle.

Yan Chen hesitated for a moment, and decided to tell the truth.

Mu Qing on the other end of the phone was silent for a long time, just when Yan Chen thought she would not speak again, Yan Chen heard a slight whimper on the other end.

"...Do you really consider yourself a saint? Yan Chen..."

Yan Chen was speechless for a moment.In fact, the person he hates the most is the saint.Because the role of the saint is always acting as a positive heroic figure, Lian Chen claims that he is not a hero, and he can't do anything selfless and fearless.Therefore, the word sage should be far away from him.

What he did was actually a very selfish decision. Most of this decision was because of Lu Xuyi, and a small part was because of his fans who had been supporting him.

"No...I'm not...you know, I never wanted to be..." Yan Chen was a little hesitant, because Mu Qing's sobs on the other end of the phone got louder.

"You didn't?!" Mu Qing was so angry that her voice trembled a little, "Yan Chen, are you careless? Otherwise...how could you tell me that you are going to die so casually?"

Mu Qing didn't lower his voice, the receiver's voice was still a little loud, and Yan Hongwen seemed to have heard it a little too.Although he was a bit puzzled, Yan Hongwen didn't say anything after all, he said something in a low voice and went out first, then got up and left the ward.

And Mu Qing here didn't listen to Yan Chen's explanation at all, and said helplessly after cursing, "Where are you at the hospital?"

At this time, Yan Chen's arrogance had completely disappeared, and the phone was hung up after saying the name of the hospital.

Mu Qing arrived at the hospital an hour later, feeling cold, with messy long hair and red eyes.

"Couldn't you find someone with a successful match?" Not wanting to ask anything else, Mu Qing asked the key point as soon as she opened her mouth.

Yan Chen smiled bitterly and shook his head slowly.

"Then what are you going to do?" Mu Qing bit her red lips, gnashing her teeth when she said these words.

"Procrastinate..." Yan Chen lowered his head and played with his fingers. When facing Mu Qing, he was always extraordinarily honest: "It's a day if it can be delayed. If you really can't hold on... then choose euthanasia."

"You bastard!"

Yan Chen's last words were like the last straw on the camel's body, and Mu Qing broke out completely.But she couldn't yell at Yan Chen, this is a hospital and Yan Chen is still a sick patient.So all the anger was swallowed by her, and the last thing she said was gnashing her teeth - "You are such a bastard!"

Yan Chen's eyes were empty, just before Mu Qing came, Shen Cheng had already told Yan Chen about the treatment he was going to receive next.Yan Chen can accept anything, because for him now, how long he can live is no longer important.

He has done almost everything he wanted to do in his life, and got everything he wanted. The only person who is sorry is Lu Xuyi and there is no one else.He has no desires or desires now, and he probably just wants to have less pain when he leaves this world.

Yan Chen didn't take Mu Qing's scolding to heart.Because he also understands that for others, his decision will never be understood by others.But Yan Chen didn't expect others to understand, he just hoped that they wouldn't be too sad after he left.

In fact, Mu Qing also understands in her heart that her persuasion is useless, unless she finds a matching bone marrow and lets Yan Chen receive a bone marrow transplant, everything else is meaningless.

Yan Chen now has no desires or desires, and even has no hope of surviving, but it doesn't mean that other people who also want him to live give up.

————————————————————————————————————

Chemotherapy started the day after Yan Chen recovered from his cold.

Once a week, three weeks a course of treatment.

The white blood cells were indeed under effective control, but after the first chemotherapy, Yan Chen lost more than half of his hair.Then came a series of side effects such as bleeding, anemia, and infection.

Yan Chen had a bad appetite, and he basically vomited when he turned around after eating, and this happened again and again, making him lose weight at a speed visible to the naked eye.

The frequent gum bleeding also made him have to endure the constant smell of blood in his mouth.

These are nothing, but what really scares everyone is an IV infusion, because the new nurse's technique is not accurate, and the injection failed to directly penetrate into the blood vessel, and the bleeding port with the big eye of the needle started to bleed profusely, and it couldn't be stopped. live.

Afterwards, Yan Chen was pushed into the emergency room, and a blood bag was transfused, but the blood that could not stop suddenly stopped by itself for some reason, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

And the new nurse who gave Yan Chen the injection almost lost her job because of it.In the end, it was Yan Chen who pleaded for the little nurse after waking up, and Shen Cheng gave up.

It has been two months since Yan Chen entered the hospital. Although the secrecy work is done well, a small number of people still know Yan Chen's identity.

This new little nurse is one of them.I deliberately found someone to change shifts, and finally saw the male god in my heart, but I couldn't bear the sadness. If I was not careful, the needle would be crooked.

The little nurse also blamed herself very much, and kept crying after the incident.

Yan Chen already doted on his fans, but now he couldn't help defending them.Although she was scolded by Shen Cheng and Mu Qing for quite a while, at least the nurse's job was saved, Yan Chen smiled helplessly.

With the end of the third chemotherapy, his white hair can be regarded as saying goodbye to him completely.When Yan Chen is free, he likes to touch his round head. Although he didn't look in the mirror, it shouldn't be ugly when he imagines it, so he doesn't dislike his appearance.

After chemotherapy, because of the decline of the immune system, everything that Yan Chen came into contact with had to be sterilized, except for eating and drinking, he had to wear an N95 mask at all times.Yan Chen said goodbye to all mobile phones.

Apart from Mu Qing, Yan Hongwen was in the ward, and of course there was Cheng Yang from Shencheng who was there every day.

But today, there is another friend whom I haven’t seen for a long time——Liu Liang.

After a moment of shock and realized that the person in front of him was Yan Chen, Liu Liang burst into tears instantly.It is said that men don't flick their tears lightly, but they haven't reached the point of sadness.Liu Liang couldn't stop crying this time, so he just let it flow.

Yan Chen was a little helpless, wanted to comfort him but didn't know how to speak, so he simply closed his mouth and didn't say anything, making Liu Liang cry enough.

After leaving the hospital that day, Liu Liang planned to come to the hospital to see Yan Chen every few days, but unexpectedly, a relative in his hometown died in a car accident.The whole family went back to their hometown to help their relatives deal with the funeral and help with compensation.Such a delay, I didn't expect it to be two months.

After finally resolving his relative's matter, Liu Liang arrived in Kyoto the day before, and showed up at the hospital the next day.But he never expected that Yan Chen not only lost his hair, but also became skinny and skinny after only two months of seeing each other!

"Bone marrow... still no news?" After finally calming down, Liu Liang asked with a trembling voice.After being Yan Chen's assistant for so long, how could Liu Liang not know about Yan Chen's rare blood type?

Yan Chen shook his head calmly.Yan Chen's face was so thin that it was only the size of a palm, and a mask almost covered more than half of it, and Liu Liang couldn't see his specific expression clearly.

"Then... what about the relatives?" Liu Liang was anxious.

Yan Chen still shook his head.Lin Jing was a tough bone, no matter how hard Yan Hongwen gnawed at her, he couldn't move her.Although Yan Chen didn't have much desire to survive, but hearing what Lin Jing did, he was still a little sad.

That was his own mother, the mother whose blood was thicker than water.The mother who stood by and kept making sarcastic remarks after she became seriously ill.If it was someone else, Yan Chen would definitely have no sorrow or joy.But after all, Lin Jing is different.

It is said that only mother is good in the world, why can't Yan Chen feel it?

"Then what should I do!?" Liu Liang stood up from the chair anxiously, his red eyes still red.His face was full of bewilderment and bewilderment, and his eyes were full of heartbreak.

Yan Chen couldn't help comforting: "It's okay, it's still a long time, the blood bank is already looking for matching bone marrow all over the world, the world is so big, you can always find it, right?"

"Yes! The world is so big and the population is so large, you can always find it!" Liu Liang was really comforted, nodded heavily, and kept repeating Yan Chen's words.

Yan Chen thought it was funny, in fact he laughed too.Mu Qing who was sitting by the side couldn't help being stunned, since Yan Chen received chemotherapy, this was the first time he laughed so happily.

Seemingly thinking of something again, Liu Liang suddenly asked: "Brother Chen, are you still going to tell Brother Yi?"

Yan Chen smiled, and was taken aback for a moment.The thing that has been persisting in my heart for a long time seems to be pushed by an invisible force, and it is a little shaken.

After a long time, Yan Chen said: "No need. He probably doesn't want to see me either."

Liu Liang stopped talking, and after sitting for a while, Yan Chen became tired and began to close his eyes for a nap, and Liu Liang could only come back another day.

When Yan Chen opened his eyes again, only him and Mu Qing were left in the ward.

After a moment of daze, Yan Chen remembered where he was.The person who hadn't mentioned his name for a long time, after Liu Liang's inadvertent inquiry, still left uneven ripples in his calm heart.

"Do you really don't want to see him?" Mu Qing couldn't help but ask.

"Huh?" Yan Chen didn't understand why.

"Lv Xuyi," Mu Qing looked directly into Yan Chen's eyes, and paused every word: "Your ex-husband. Don't you want to see him?"

The smiles at the corners of his mouth piled up into bitterness, which poured into his already impenetrable heart, and the iron-walled heart was corroded to tatters.Yan Chen's disguise was broken for a moment, but he quickly repaired it.

——"Why do you think? What do you think?"

As soon as the words came out, his throat seemed to be strangled severely, and Yan Chen could hardly breathe.