independent filmmaker

After hanging up the phone, Xie Lansheng went to wash his hands.He turned on the faucet and kept washing it, as if he wanted to get rid of the touch of the microphone, but the intense sound of running water couldn't hide the surging blood in his ears.

Film wasted.

The film is useless!The film is useless The film is useless! ! !

His brain was numb and his temples were throbbing.

So now, what is he going to do?The film and shooting funds were used up a month ago, the team broke up, Qi Yong has returned to the United States, Nannan and Xinye are gone, and the whole half year has been wasted.

He shouldn't have gone to Australia to do the post-processing of this film, and he shouldn't have sent the films together to save money. He should at least have packaged the films separately just in case... But there is no "if" in everything, the worst has happened.

He has never sent an international package, and he doesn't know there is "customs clearance".He just felt that he couldn't check the samples anyway, he could only recognize the good ones and the bad ones, and he sent them one after another and together, they were all the same.

Xie Lansheng's accusations against himself have even turned into heart-pounding regret.There seemed to be a ball of fire in his chest that was about to explode.

He thought of the scenes of "begging for help" with his relatives, the scenes of borrowing a camera from Mr. Wang, the scenes of picking up the train to buy film, and the scenes of inviting Xin Ye to play "Wang Fusheng". I thought of those days when I drank with the village chief and had stomach bleeding, and also thought of those days when I invited Cen Chen and Qi Yong to join... The scenes were so real, but all of them were useless efforts. It's ironic now to think about it.Not only he himself was doing useless work, but also more than a dozen other people including Nan Nan, Xin Ye, Cen Chen, and Qi Yong were all doing useless work.

He also thought of what Nathan said, "The customs officer in charge of inspecting the package has a better understanding of the cultural industry... So, he determined that the items in the package were contraband and there was something wrong with it, so he carried out the customs inspection without hesitation."

Xie Lansheng covered his face with his hands.

He just wants to be a director, he just wants to make a movie, why is it so difficult?

He couldn't even help thinking, would it be easier if he worked like thousands of screws, without ideals or ambitions?Like everyone else, he honestly works as an assistant director or even a scene reporter at Xiaoxiang Factory, wouldn't he be happier?Or, as his parents said, he didn't take the Nortel exam at all, but the University of Science and Technology. Would life go smoothly?

How many people have to go through so many twists and turns at work?So much unknown, so much unknown, so much self-blame, so much regret?

To put it bluntly, everyone lives the same way, only he is so hypocritical.

He knew that panic and panic were not the true face of life.

Xie Lansheng sat in front of the table, his whole body was weak and his brain was numb.

He has a weight on his mind.It just hid in the thick darkness and peeped diligently, neither coming out nor leaving, just staring at him.There seems to be something tied to the bottom of the heavy object. If he really lifts it, he will have to face something much larger than the previous heavy object. He didn't make a single film last year, and after another year of tossing, he is still doing nothing.

Xie Lansheng felt that if a family member or friend saw his expression at this moment, they would not be able to recognize him as the always optimistic person. He probably felt that this was a clumsy painter using him as a model to express his sorrow to his heart's content.

Until ten o'clock in the evening, Xie Lansheng was still in a daze.

Someone burned paper at the intersection outside the window.The flames shot up very vigorously at first, but slowly dimmed, and finally turned into a pile of ashes. Once the wind passed, they danced and then fell down one after another.Xie Lansheng felt that it was especially like his journey, where enthusiasm was high at the beginning, and there was no trace in the end.

…………

Xie Lansheng didn't even feel like eating for the whole day.

He just lay on his own bed, leaning on a small pillow, hugging a small quilt, staring at the ceiling in a daze, wishing he could sleep for a long time.

This state continued until the early morning of the next day.At around nine o'clock, Xie Lansheng received a call from Xin Ye who was far away from the Shanghai Film Studio, asking him how the film was and whether it had been received in Australia.

"Xinye..."

"Huh? What's wrong?"

Suddenly hearing Xin Ye's voice, Xie Lansheng's grievance came up, a bit like a stray dog, with wet face: "Xin Ye... If, I said if, there is a problem in the post-production in Australia, all the films can't be used, all efforts will be in vain Now, do you think I should stick to it?" It was the third time to turn on the machine again.It was the first time to start the official launch, and it was the second time for Qi Yong and Cen Chen to start after joining. Now...

Is this God preventing him from doing this?

Xinye's voice was calm and cool, but with strange strength, he said, "Then do it again."

However, Xie Lansheng somehow felt that Xinye's back would not hurt while standing and talking, and he said dejectedly, "Redo? It's easy to say..." The film was useless, even he wanted to escape a little bit.

"It's easy to do." Xin Ye remained calm, as if he could see through everything, "Lan Sheng, no matter how difficult it is, can it be more difficult than last time? As long as you can accept it in your heart, redoing is just repetitive work, so it's not difficult." .”

"..." seems to have some truth.

Because the film has been scrapped, the company did not start work later, and the bulk of the funds are still in the account, probably less than 19 yuan. He only spent 6000 yuan, so he may not be able to think of a way. Lucky said that by inviting them to be sponsors, they can save nearly [-] at once... Rebuilding the team and reshooting "Rooting" is easier than last time.

After thinking about it, Xie Lansheng asked Xinye: "Xinye, have you ever felt that you will not be able to survive?"

Xinye said, "Yes."

Xie Lansheng asked again: "What is it? Can you tell me?"

"Well," Xinye's voice was calm but reassuring, "I felt this way several times when I was taking the Chartered Financial Analyst exam at Harvard."

"...what?" What Financial Analyst?

"Maybe it is called Chartered Financial Analyst in Chinese? If you want to enter an investment bank, you need to get this qualification. Although I major in economics, I want hand-on experience." Finance and business majors are rarely offered during the training stage, and they feel that they are too low-level and too philistine. Finance itself is not difficult to learn, and you can get started after work. Therefore, investment banks favor economics majors like them, which are also related majors after all.

"Oh oh..." Xie Lansheng didn't quite understand.

Xin Ye continued: "At that time, I had to pass the exam four times before I finally passed it. It took me two years to study for 15 hours a day, eat for two hours, sleep for seven hours, and do nothing else. Because of sitting for a long time, I seldom drink water, and I have kidney stones.”

Xie Lansheng: "Eh?" Xin Ye is so embarrassed?

Xin Ye continued to immerse herself in the memory: "I am reviewing all the time. I only knew at that time that a 0.5 mm refill can fill 25 pages of A4 paper."

"Xinye—" It also sounded miserable.

"After four times, I passed. Everything is meaningful, and the other people who are preparing for the exam are all thinking the same way. So Lan Sheng, don't worry, you will definitely get what you want, and you will find what you pursue. As long as you can get there in the end." At the end, no one will care whether you drive a car or a tractor. Believe me, I have met too many people. Those who are more successful are far more stubborn than ordinary people, even paranoid. They will not give up until they reach their goals. The attitude is also what makes these people special.”

"I've heard," Xie Lansheng recalled an article he had read for no reason, "your school library is still overcrowded at four o'clock in the morning, and everyone is working hard. Geniuses don't just appear out of thin air."

"Yes," Xinye said, "so they all succeeded."

"Xinye..." Xie Lansheng wiped his face, "Thank you, you are right, as long as you keep going, you will be able to take pictures one day. It's not like me just now." Thinking about it carefully, maybe, the most beautiful moment Well, it was the moment when he sold the movie, looked back on the hardships along the way, and thought, 'Fortunately, I never gave up'.

"Ah That's good."

"It may be better to shoot again in all aspects. Maybe, if I send it directly to the exhibition, I will get nothing in the end, but if I change it again, the final result will be different. A movie, a person, will He has his own destiny. Well, we can re-elect the main creators of photography, recording, etc., Xiaohong and Xiaolu can help, and my daughter should be able to come back." Speaking of this, Xie Lansheng asked, "Xin Ye, do you have no schedule? Is it? Are you going to film the film?"

"It's okay," Xinye replied, "It will start up next year."

"Then, how much salary do you need?"

Xin Ye laughed lowly: "No need to add."

"Can……"

"I'm an actor, I don't get a weekly salary, and I said at the beginning that the filming is over."

Xie Lansheng thought for a while: "Then, if it can be sold in the end, hey, I don't dare to talk about it now... If it can be sold in the end, I will add another 50% to everyone."

Hearing this, Xin Ye asked him: "Are you refreshed again?"

"Yes, thank you." Xie Lansheng said, "I feel much better after the chat. In fact, I didn't plan to give up at first, but I found it too difficult, even more difficult than expected."

"Okay." Xin Ye nodded, "If that's the case, then I'll tell the truth, the experience of CFA is all made up."

"Ah?" Xie Lansheng was dumbfounded.

Xinye said in distaste: "CFA is so simple, I passed the exam within a few weeks. In addition, this exam can only be taken after the senior year, and it is only held twice a year, in December and June respectively, and I am 12 The month is already in China."

Xie Lansheng: "..." She was powerless.

"Also," Xinye said again, "We don't go to the library to read and review at four o'clock in the morning, just kidding, the library hasn't opened yet at four o'clock in the morning."

Xie Lansheng said again: "..."

powerless.Xinye is really talking about running the train, making up things to achieve his goal, and he clearly knew this from the beginning.Moreover, the king of liars is a good liar, and he can make up many details, such as "Because of sitting for a long time, rarely drinking water, and suffering from kidney stones" "A 0.5 mm refill can write 25 pages of A4 paper" , It sounds like the real thing, convinced.Xie Lansheng thinks that Xin Ye's characteristics are firstly that he loves to deceive others, and second that he can choke others, loves to talk irony, is always reasonable, always correct, and has a very oppressive aura.

However, Xie Lansheng had to admit that with Xinye's comfort and jokes, his condition was much better.

Yes, at least he is shooting by himself now, he has the final say, as long as he is not willing to give up, he will be able to make it sooner or later, he doesn't need to be hit hard.

"Are you alone now?" Xinye continued to say, "Don't think about it. My side is over too, and I'm going to the airport to return to Beijing." He planned to wait, but now he feels that the faster the better.

"Hey?" Xie Lansheng said, "No need, Xinye, take your time. I feel much better now...it's useless for you to come back."

Hearing this, Xin Ye was obviously silent for a while, but still said: "I'll go back."

"Oh..." Xie Lansheng said, "Then I look forward to it."

…………

After feeling better, Xie Lansheng was hungry.He ordered himself a bowl of chopped green onion noodles, and put an egg in it, the aroma was overflowing.Xie Lansheng set the dining table aside, sat in front of the table, sucked on the noodles, and felt that everything was okay, not that bad.

The main cost of shooting a movie is the printing of the film, so the 25 yuan is still there, or basically still.What he has to do now is to raise funds for the reshoot, sixty to seventy thousand.

Xinye said that he could play the role, and that Nannan should be able to call him back.As for photographers and sound engineers, they can always find the right ones... Everything is far from over.

After Xie Lansheng finished eating the scallion noodles, he let out a long sigh of relief, went back to his room, picked up a pen, and began to plan for another "restart" of the film.

In the end, I don't know if it was a gift from God to his mentality. At four o'clock in the afternoon, Xie Lansheng received another call from Nathan, the editor.

The author has something to say:

The Harvard story should be later!

In the last chapter, someone said that Xie Lansheng should copy the negatives at the same time, so that they would not be ruined.No... The backup is also a backup copy of the Australian company for later use. In any case, Director Xie can only send one.