No.18 Years of Waking of Insects

Toyosaki paused, and added: "...It's not that he never came back, but that he never came back again."

Lu Jinghong noticed that there was a slight tremor in his calm voice when he said this, and realized that the uncle he was talking about had an important meaning to him.Moreover, he has never been so serious and objective in telling a story about his Japanese relatives in front of his face.

So, he responded seriously and signaled Toyosaki to continue talking.

Unexpectedly, Toyosaki suddenly turned his head and asked him: "Then why do you think I brought you here?"

Lu Jinghong realized something was wrong when he asked him this question.

Now he is getting more and more confused about what he wants to do. At first, he thought that his conscience was not lost. In order to repay his kindness for saving his life, he was sent here to retire. By the way, after death, he can chant The Buddhist scriptures are super personal.But in the past few days, his attitude was indifferent, and it was good if he didn't torture him to death on the road.

Lu Jinghong shook his head sincerely and remained silent.

Toyosaki said slowly: "Because of you, you are different from them."

Lu Jinghong turned his head to look into his eyes, squinted his eyes slightly and asked, "Listen to what you said, who did you want to bring?"

Toyosaki's eyebrows and eyes remained the same as before, and he said lightly: "Why, are you jealous?"

Lu Jinghong obviously didn't expect Toyosaki to be here suddenly. At this time, under such circumstances, he said something so unclear, coughed twice in embarrassment, and said: "Who knows which girl you like, I I don't like other girls..."

Toyosaki looked into his eyes and continued to ask: "Are you, you don't like girls from other people's families, or...don't you like girls?"

Hearing this question, Lu Jinghong blushed rarely, and concluded: "I...you don't care what I do, anyway, I'm not interested in robbing you for a wife. Girl, I'm even less interested."

As a result, after his answer, Toyosaki's originally gentle face became indifferent at this moment, and his voice became a little cold: "You still care so much about my being Japanese?"

Sensing that his mood suddenly became cold again, Lu Jinghong secretly thought it was bad, for fear that if he became murderous or something.Quickly smiled and shook his head in denial: "No, no, I'm not shy, you see I'm nervous and won't say..."

Before he could finish the excuses he made up, he was pulled into his arms by Toyosaki in front of him, his warm breath lingering in his ears, seemed to be the only temperature in this desert Tibetan plain.

Lu Jinghong was so frightened that his body stiffened and he did not move.

Toyosaki chuckled suddenly, leaned into his ear, took his words, and murmured: "Why are you shy, I haven't said anything yet."

Lu Jinghong twisted his face and buried his head, suddenly felt that he was slapping himself in the face, obviously the other party hadn't farted yet, so he thought that he was going to tell him something serious.Now, where to put his old face...

"Put it in my arms, okay?" Toyosaki's faint voice sounded from above his head.

"Ah?" Lu Jinghong subconsciously raised his head in doubt, and just happened to look straight into his bright eyes.Inside, there seemed to be a silent sea of ​​stars, but now, it seems to be waking up.

Seeing his puzzled look, Toyosaki curled the corners of his mouth rarely, and asked again: "Can you put your face in my arms?"

"How do you know..." Lu Jinghong asked sullenly, he obviously didn't say anything just now.

Toyosaki recalled his depressed and self-hatred expression just now, and said softly: "I was not sure at first, and I was thinking about how to round up the words if I guessed wrong, but now it seems that there is still a bit of a relationship between us. There is a tacit understanding."

When Lu Jinghong heard this, he felt that it was not good for him to stay in his arms all the time. If the monks in the temple saw him later, he would be ashamed.

So he broke free from Toyosaki's embrace, looked at his face seriously, and said to him: "I...we..." But after only a few words, he paused for a moment and didn't know how to continue.Because in this quiet and moon-deep ancient temple, he found that he could no longer see himself clearly...

Toyosaki looked at his hesitant to speak, stroked his black and white intertwined hair with his slender fingers, sighed slowly, and said softly: "Although we are all men, you are alone, and I , no one can stop my decision. If you care that I am Japanese, we can stay here forever, regardless of worldly affairs."

Feeling his slightly cold fingers, Lu Jinghong trembled slightly, but he didn't know whether it was the body trembling more or the heart trembling more.

"No, I don't even care..." He closed his eyes and said slowly.

What he cares about may be only his few life spans.Originally, he had nothing to worry about in this mortal world, but now, after all, he couldn't escape the word "love".

The little monk in the daytime walked to the door of the Buddhist hall at this time, and a crisp voice sounded: "You two benefactors, you can fast now." Then he politely turned his body to the side corridor and said, "Here please."

Lu Jinghong restrained his emotions and took the lead to follow.Toyosaki was expressionless, and walked slowly to the fasting room in the back courtyard.

There were already five or six monks sitting in the fasting room, wearing cassocks and sitting at the wooden table, fasting quietly.The abbot is probably still sorting out Buddhist scriptures in the sutra room at this time, and the young monks personally delivered the fasting meal to his room in the evening, so including the whole temple, there are only a few people.

The young monk chose another clean small square wooden table for the two of them. On it were four steamed buns of highland barley noodles, a plate of green vegetables, and two bowls of porridge.

Lu Jinghong ate steamed buns and drank porridge. He never thought that he would be so hungry. At first, he thought that although the temple was poor, at least a few more steamed buns should be put on it.But seeing that the porridge bowl was really big, he didn't worry about it anymore.

After eating, they borrowed the bathing pool in the temple to take a bath, and changed into men's Tibetan robes from the farmer's family.Fortunately, although the temple is poor, it happens to have two compartments, so that Lu Jinghong and Toyosaki won't be awkwardly entangled in who will eat first and who will go first.

But after returning to the room, he deeply realized that the real embarrassment had just arrived.

"I, you..." Lu Jinghong originally wanted to figure out who would sleep on the floor and who would sleep in the bed with Toyosaki, but he felt that if he did this, it would be too hypocritical.

They were originally two big men, so why pretend to be a chaste and strong woman?

Unexpectedly, Toyosaki saw that he stood shyly at the door and refused to go in, so he walked into the room by himself, took off his boots and got on the bed, pulled over the embroidered quilt, and closed his eyes.

The whole movement is done in one go, without the slightest discomfort.

Lu Jinghong just stood there in a daze, this guy really doesn't know how to cherish his teammates.Thinking about it, I took off my hat and put it on the table, then quietly pulled out the bamboo mat that had accumulated a thin layer of dust at the bottom of the bed, and spread it out on the open space in the middle of the room.

"Not yet." The man with his eyes closed on the bed suddenly spoke.

Lu Jinghong paused when he spread the mat.

The whole room was very silent, as if only the sound of snow melting outside could be heard.

Lying on the bed, Toyosaki said again: "Are you waiting for me to hug you?"

Sure enough, when he said that, Lu Jinghong shook unexpectedly, quickly took off his shoes, and obediently climbed onto the bed.

After all, when the two of them were in 'Fansi' last time, Toyosaki just finished asking the same question, and threw him off the second floor unexpectedly.Now that the night is quiet, he can't imagine what it would be like to be thrown onto the bed by him like a dead body.

In the end, when they got into bed, Lu Jinghong half-kneeled beside the bed hesitantly. He didn't see Toyosaki move into the bed intentionally. He couldn't help poking his shoulder and said, "Hey... I want to sleep. outside."

Toyosaki kept his eyes closed all the time, and said lightly: "Sleeping inside."

Hearing his firm rebuttal, Lu Jinghong immediately stayed by the bed and did not move.In this situation, how dare he sleep in it? If something happens later, he doesn't know where to run, will he hit the wall at that time?

"Are you worried that I will cheat on you?" Toyosaki asked, feeling that his breath was a little disturbed.

He faltered for a while, thinking, big brother, let me sleep outside, anyway, I promise I won't plot against you!

Seeing that he didn't answer, Toyosaki opened his eyes quickly, stretched out his hand to clasp his shoulder, pressed his right shoulder and turned over, and pushed him to the inside of the wooden bed, where he half-kneeled and leaned slightly on Lu Jinghong's body. , with a faint smile on the corner of his mouth.

But Lu Jinghong completely forgot that he was being pressed under him with his backhand at this moment, and just stared blankly at his slightly curved eyebrows and slightly turned corners of his mouth.

He seemed to be smiling a lot tonight.

He thought that he had always been an unhappy person.

After sighing, he shrank his pupils belatedly, and stammered: "Uh, you... what are you doing?"

Toyosaki let go of the hand that was pressing on his shoulder, stretched out his fingers to gently stroke his long hair, and replied: "Someone is disobedient, I am going to teach him a lesson."

As soon as the words came out of his mouth, Lu Jinghong instantly felt a chill on his back, moved his body uncomfortably, turned his head and said, "You, you hurry up and let go... Can you still sleep..."

Toyosaki frowned slightly, and said in a low hoarse voice: "Lying on the same bed with you, I didn't intend to sleep peacefully."

As soon as he heard it, his face turned red, and he pushed him away with all his might, only to hear a cry of pain in the empty room.

Toyosaki had already turned over and lay beside him with his force, but he stopped when he heard his soft cry, and suddenly stood up sideways and asked, "What's wrong, where is the injury?"

Lu Jinghong frowned slightly and glanced at him, he didn't hit or knock or hurt.It's just that the gunshot wound I received in Weixiang Pavilion a few days ago has not completely healed, and it just hurt again because of excessive force.

But looking at his nervous expression, he still shook his head slightly, and replied half-jokingly: "It's nothing, but you are too heavy, and my leg hurts just now."

Toyosaki breathed a sigh of relief when he heard it, and lay down again. After a long time, he said, "Lu Jinghong, do you regret it?"

Lu Jinghong tilted his head to look at his profile, who was close at hand. There was only one butter lamp standing on the corner of the table in the whole room, and the candle light was faint.It seemed that this was the first time he really called out his name, but he didn't regret it after asking him, and there was a bit of bitterness in his words.

He laughed suddenly and said, "What are you regretting, we obviously haven't done anything yet."

Toyosaki described what he said in a low voice: "That's right... I didn't do anything..." He also turned his head to look at him seriously, and said, "Then how about..."

"Don't don't." He immediately shrank back into the bed, afraid of what he might do.So he quickly pulled the quilt, covered himself, closed his eyes tightly and said, "Sleep quickly."

Seeing him dodging in such fear, Toyosaki also gently closed his eyes.Quietly feeling the breath of the people around him, I wanted to slowly stretch my left hand, which was frozen under the blanket, to his right hand, but thinking that my hand was extremely cold, I bent my fingers and stopped moving.

After a long time, he asked again in the dimly lit room: "You said at first...whether the gender is the same is not important, so what is really important?"

Lu Jinghong didn't expect that at this moment, here and now, he was still struggling with this topic. He paused and said, "It's... a question of whether we are willing to abandon the world and stay together for the rest of our lives."

But now, he thought... Maybe he has completely fallen.

Even if he has no life, he will spend his remaining days to stay together.Anyway, he won't live for long, so it's better to be a self that he has never seen before, at least... This is the self he will least regret.