i have a chromosome want to meet you

"My dream is to become a doctor and help the world to save people. I believe that in ten years time, I will be able to put on a white coat and tell my patients that I will do my best to help you recover." Accompanied by the cold In the night sky, Chu Xiuyuan recited the composition word by word.

"I think all my obsessions in my life are the white coat. I will wear it to pick up the patient's case for the first time, wear it to write the first prescription in my life, and wear him to the ground in the end. I hope that my life At the last moment, we can all struggle in the consulting room of the hospital, and in the ward where the pain of the patients is relieved."

The moonlight was bright and cold, shining in Chu Xiuyuan's eyes: "Like the moon that appears every night, before I get the admission letter, that white coat will appear in the future I imagine every day, even if the dark clouds cover the Without the light, she's still there."

Dad took a puff of cigarette, then spit it out silently.

"There have been two times in my life. The first time was the moment when I received the admission letter with great joy. Looking at the words "School of Public Health" on the letter, I thought I had sent it to the wrong address. "Chu Xiuyuan smiled bitterly, "At that moment, I felt that my life had come to an end."

Dad flicked his fingertips, and the soot fell on the ground.

"Do you know what I thought when you came to persuade me that being a doctor is not a good profession?" Chu Xiuyuan kept the smile on his mouth, which was ugly and glaring under the cold moonlight, "You Said that before you became a doctor, your mother might have left, and you always thought about saving others, why didn't you save your mother first."

"After Mom cut her wrists in the living room, you blamed me for being ignorant and provoking her even though I knew she was emotionally unstable, saying that I almost ruined the house." As he spoke, Chu Xiuyuan could no longer maintain the smile on his lips. "From then on, in order not to aggravate my mother's condition, I buried my dream with my own hands. I burned my primary school composition. I never wanted to pick up my own case and take a look at it."

"You let me follow her in everything, even if I don't want to do it, but how can I face the person who tore and obliterated my dream for more than ten years? How can I treat her calmly? You know how much I spent Only when I have strength can I tell her with a smile, I know you are for my own good, I am fine. But how can I be fine. Every time I see her, all I see is my grave, and every time she talks to me, it reminds me Me, my primary school composition has long been burned to ashes, and I can't put it together again."

"I want to be a doctor, is that wrong?"

The sparks of the cigarette butts flickered in the dark night, but they couldn't burn a little temperature.

"Ha..." Chu Xiuyuan sneered, "You know, when my high school classmates learned that I got a high score in the test, which was a full 20 points higher than Linba, they called me to congratulate me, and my heart Do you know how I felt when Zhu Zhao looked at me in amazement when I went to the public health to report? He asked me why I didn’t go to Linba, but I couldn’t answer a word.”

"I have no way to tell them that my dream is dead. I can't say it. It seems that if I don't say it, I'm still alive."

Chu Xiuyuan turned to look at his silent father: "Dad, am I still alive?"

Dad suddenly stubbed out the cigarette, and after a long silence, he said, "You're right, I can't even smoke a cigarette now." It was he and his mother, Chu Xiuyuan's closest relatives, who killed Chu Xiuyuan with their own hands. Xiu Yuan's dream.

For his mother's illness, the person he felt most sorry for in this world was Chu Xiuyuan.

Chu Xiuyuan raised his eyes and looked at the night sky again. The moon still reflected the sun's light, but it was softer than the sun: "Dad, I want to live, can I live?"

"You want your dad to support you in changing your major?"

Chu Xiuyuan smiled suddenly: "I don't expect you, I know you can't do it. In your heart, mother will always be the first."

Dad seemed to be strangled by the throat, unable to say a word.He was overwhelmed by the disappointment and ridicule in Chu Xiuyuan's words.What did a father do to make his own son laugh at himself and say "I don't expect you".How incompetent is he for his son to have no hope in him?

"Later, I had a second obsession. He made me suddenly realize that I was still breathing." Chu Xiuyuan touched his lips. It was the place Song Yu had kissed before, and it still remained in his imagination. Song Yu licked softly yet firmly, "If my dream is destined to be ruined in the summer of my college entrance examination, at least don't take away my last obsession and last hope. What I pursue is to live two It's just words."

"Dad, is it difficult?" Chu Xiuyuan didn't look at his father, and his voice seemed to be blown away by the wind, "I want to know that I'm still alive, is it difficult?"

Dad took out a cigarette and turned on the lighter, but it couldn't light no matter what, he pointed it four or five times, lit it, and took a deep breath: "I'm sorry, Dad."

"I don't need your apology, I just want to know my last obsession, whether I can still have him, and whether I can stop burying him with my own hands." Chu Xiuyuan stared at his father firmly, it was from his heart cries, "I want to live, I just want to live like myself."

"What do you want Dad to do for you?"

Chu Xiuyuan clenched his fists: "I fell in love with someone. His name is Song Yu. When I was with him, I finally stopped suffering from the irritability and despair of being buried in my dreams. I felt the beating of my heart. I I found a new purpose. At that moment, I suddenly realized that I was still alive, and fortunately I was alive."

"What target?"

"Cure him. Be with him."

"Cure him?"

"He has OCD."

Dad was surprised: "Your mother's obsessive-compulsive disorder?"

"Yes." Chu Xiuyuan nodded, "I promised him my whole life, and I promised not to give up on him. He has many symptoms because of me, and I have to be responsible for him."

"Yes..." Dad clamped the cigarette butt tightly, watching the cigarette burn for a while, "Is it the boy in the post that almost made your mother sick?"

Chu Xiuyuan let out a long breath: "Yes."

Dad wanted to raise his hand holding the cigarette butt, and leaned hard on his knee again.He vaguely guessed that Chu Xiuyuan had something to do with that boy before, and he really wanted to have a good talk with Chu Xiuyuan because of his mother, but now, his mind is full of Chu Xiuyuan's words "Daddy, am I still alive?" So fragile, so hopeless, as if it could disappear into the world anytime, anywhere, as if it had never been here before.

"I want to live, I just want to live like myself."

"I felt my heart beating, and I found a new purpose. At that moment, I suddenly realized that I was still alive, and fortunately I was alive."

We gave him life, should we deprive him of the meaning of existence again and again.

"Can you tell me about you and him?"

Chu Xiuyuan smiled: "The first time I met him was in a lecture..."

Chu Xiuyuan talked a lot, about Song Yu fighting against the rumors on the forum for him, about how he had hurt Song Yu, but he still stayed by his side, running for him on the road to change majors, about Song Yu The psychology lecture specially set up for him talked about how he was struggling between sexual orientations, and finally talked about Song Yu's illness.

Because he was unable to come out with Song Yu, Song Yu became ill. It was later discovered that all of Song Yu's symptoms during the time with Song Yu were related to him.

Maybe Song Yu never liked him, but he must be responsible to Song Yu, because he likes him.

"I want to be with him and when I'm with him, I know I'm alive. I'm going to do my best to heal him."

The cigarette in Dad's hand changed one after another, but he just let it burn. When Chu Xiuyuan finished the last sentence, Dad took another deep breath: "How important is he to you?"

"Just like your mother did to you."

"Even if he doesn't like you?"

"Even if mom doesn't like you."

"Little red guy! Knowing that daddy has nothing to do with your mom, you can use your mom as a bargaining chip!" Dad sighed and pointed to the balcony door, "Get out, let me think about it, give me one night, let me think about it."

That night, Dad and Chu Xiuyuan didn't sleep.

Dad sat on the balcony by himself, smoked two packs of cigarettes one by one, tore off another two packs from the top of the curtain, and went back to the balcony to continue smoking.And Chu Xiuyuan sat by the bed, watched the orange light on the balcony flickering from the window, and saw the morning just like that.

At five o'clock in the morning, it was still dark, "click", the door of Chu Xiuyuan's bedroom was gently opened, and his father sat next to the bed, smelling of cigarettes, next to Chu Xiuyuan.

Chu Xiuyuan nervously looked at his pale and emaciated father, and his father patted Chu Xiuyuan's shoulder: "What you said to me yesterday, you should also tell your mother about it in two days."

Chu Xiuyuan shuddered, and his bloodshot eyes suddenly lit up.

Dad, this is... agree?

"You are not afraid of mother..."

Dad scratched his head: "Your mother can communicate with you except that you are a doctor. I will watch my mother here, even if I don't sleep for a week or two, I will watch her."

At this moment, Dad made his most solemn promise to Chu Xiuyuan.

Chu Xiuyuan looked at his father incredulously. He had thought of many possibilities, such as refusing, beating and scolding, ordering him to leave Song Yu, or cold war and severing ties. He also thought that his father could understand him.And Dad's reaction was better than anything he could have imagined!

He even suspected that he was dreaming.

Great, Dad understands him, Dad actually understands him!And Dad will try to persuade Mom!

"Oh." Dad looked at Chu Xiuyuan who was so excited that he couldn't speak, "Is it unexpected, is it surprising, is it exciting?"

Chu Xiuyuan hugged his father violently, his voice choked up: "Dad, thank you, thank you..."

Dad patted Chu Xiuyuan's back and shoulders, suddenly rejoicing that he made this decision.

"I used to always ask you to give way to my mother. In fact, when I changed my choice, I couldn't stop my mother. I have always regretted and felt guilty. But I didn't know how much pressure and pain you were under until yesterday. I am not a good person. Dad, I am the accomplice who buried your dream of being a doctor." Dad sighed, "So I will hold on to your new goal, and let you see that Dad can be a competent husband and a competent father. .”

Chu Xiuyuan touched his fast beating heart, only to feel that all the smog was blown away at this moment, revealing the only thing left in Pandora's Box.

The sky brightened up.

"But Dad has a request." Dad said seriously after a while, "Remember to protect yourself, don't make me come back with some messy problems, and if you don't get along with him, I hope you can come back and get married Have a child."

How could there be messy problems, we still wear condoms for enemas!

As for the second half of the sentence, Chu Xiuyuan directly ignored it.

Dad let go, and it is impossible for Chu Xiuyuan to haggle unwisely, just nod, and he is about to nod.

"But to be honest." Dad wiped his face, "I really hope you can find a healthy person, because it is very tiring to take care of your mother who is crazy, and there is one more person in the family who needs to be taken care of. will be hollowed out."

Chu Xiuyuan suddenly laughed: "Kidney Treasure Tablets?"

"Little red guy." Dad also laughed, and slapped Chu Xiuyuan on the back of the forehead.

Chu Xiuyuan's mouth was grinning to the ear, but he restrained himself again, with a serious expression, so serious that his father subconsciously sat upright, hearing Chu Xiuyuan's tired voice, but his tone was firmer than the most important day in his life.

"My own people, I can take care of," he said.

The author has something to say: Dad: Don’t make me come back with some messy diseases

Chu Xiuyuan: How could it be? We have already used Durex’s Ai Ai series of apple, strawberry and orange flavors, as well as Durex Love, Durex Vitality, Durex Love, Durex Double Insurance, Durex Passion, Durex Stylish, Durex Love Durex thread pack Durex ultra-thin pack Durex colorful fruity pack Durex cool pack Durex bump thread pack Durex bump thread cool feeling Durex bump thread heat

dad:……

Chu Xiuyuan: Ah, no, I haven’t tried the last three, I can try it next time

dad:……

Chu Xiuyuan: Dad, you who only use Okamoto can’t understand Durex

Dad: I'll kill you little redhead!