My deskmate is gay

【thanks. 】

I thought I would live alone in a world of one person.

However, I met you.

I don't know what state of mind you had when you saw me for the first time, I just know that we are not people from the same world, just like two intersecting lines, we will be farther and farther apart soon.

But... I can't get rid of you more and more.

You are long-winded, but full of caring words.You are domineering, but full of likable mannerisms.

I was like this, falling step by step, unable to extricate myself.

I don't even remember our meeting at the beginning, I only remember that there was a teenager lying on the seat next to me, blocking my steps.

You are the first person who will put food in my bowl and talk non-stop.You are the first person who was scolded by me and will stay by my side.You are the first person who accepted my past and was willing to be with me.You are the first person who hugged me and said that you would cook for me for a lifetime.

You are also the first one to say that you like me.

I have never felt what liking is. It is you who let me know what kind of taste it is. It is sweet, but the moment I eat it, it is bitter.

There was no sign at all, the days together were very long, but very short, so one day, you looked at me tiredly, and the words in your mouth cut me into pieces cruelly.

At that time, I suddenly realized that all along, I never seemed to care about your family, you and I only talked about my frivolity when I was young.

Nothing about the parents.

Whether it was my negligence or your deliberation, I don't know.

I asked you: "Do you want to be with me all the time?"

I asked you: "Have you always loved me?"

You promised: "I'll always cook for you."

You promised: "I will accompany you to Holland and witness happiness."

but……

you have grown up.

This is what you said to me on the wedding day. I don't understand what kind of mood I came there at that time, and what kind of mood I faced with your appearance.

I drank the wine, through the transparent wine glass, my eyes were slightly blurred, but I still saw the girl next to me clearly, oh no, your wife.

The bride is beautiful and suits you well.

My heart hurts, but there's nothing I can do about it, isn't it?

Milo, since this is the case...then we have no choice but to never see each other again.

Leaving waddlingly may be my best curtain call.

Leaving may be my best choice, and sealing up our memories may be my best attitude.

I hope that one day, I can also hold the hand of the person who will not let go of me, go back to the original starting point, and tell him everything with a smile.

Then, he stroked my head and whispered softly: "It's okay, I'm still here."

I also hope that everyone who leaves a mark on my youth will get their own person.

Like Ye An.

Maybe he is the one who will be by my side, but he lacks a little unknown emotion, even if I forget the past with you in the next second, I can't accept him.

He is like a friend, teacher, brother, worthy of deep friendship, but unable to be a lover.

The quicksands of the years are still falling, and I flew to Holland.

The happiness there is what we all look forward to. Even if you are gone, I will take in all the happiness alone, and then cherish it carefully.

Maybe?That's my new starting point.

[Thank you for making my memory so vivid. 】