Continuation of "Gone with the Wind"

Chapter [-] Travels to the North

She chatted with Andrew for a few more words, but she saw that he was absent-minded, so she left with interest.Originally thought that Andrew might be able to give her some advice, but the result seemed to add new troubles to him. The guilt made her not pick on how rude Andrew was for not saying goodbye to her. In fact, she didn't care about it before. Politeness is used to keep a distance from people you don't like, and you don't need such false tricks with people you like.That's right, she likes Andrew quite a lot, between friends—sometimes she even thinks it would be nice if mom and dad could keep friends.

Dad didn't come back at lunch just now. In fact, this kind of situation happened quite a lot. Every time he would send someone back to report, and my mother always responded with "know it", and didn't even care about his whereabouts at all. It was picked up by the orderly standing respectfully in front of her.But Dad didn't seem to be affected, so the figure of the young orderly became a part of her memory, even though she was still young at that time, and her mother had already taken her away from Dad when she was still young, but that afternoon under the sun The straight figure was burned into her retina.

Thinking about it now, if it wasn't for this blue uniform, she would have forgotten her life in the north for a long time.I was also persistent enough at the time, my mother always wanted her to forget my father, although she never said this to her face, but not saying it is an attitude, a better attitude.Repeated emphasis will only make people impressed, and forgetting is always done inadvertently.She did almost succeed. It's not that she didn't want to fight against forgetting, but memory is not unbreakable.The tall but lonely figure who came on behalf of her father was washed away by time like a cobblestone at the bottom of the river. She had long forgotten the looks of those orderlies, and even her father's appearance. Only the neat blue uniform, It is reflected more clearly in the superposition of countless memory illusions constructed by her to resist forgetting.

The strange thing is that she didn't see anyone come back today to say where her father was, because she couldn't come back for some reason. From the time the table was set until the servants took down the tableware, Dad's share was left untouched.I don't know if she was thinking too much, but her mother's expression seemed a little uneasy, and her eyes drifted to the door from the dining room to the living room from time to time, as if she was secretly expecting something.

Different from ordinary children, the question that Angela often thinks about in the north is "whether mom loves dad?" In the south, it becomes "why doesn't mom love dad?" After meeting Jack, it becomes "how can I love dad?" Let mother fall in love with father", and now it is "whether mother and father are willing to be together forever".But it is too difficult for her to think about these issues since she has never had any experience in love. She will not say the word "love" lightly. She is as clear about "love" as her mother. There are the majority of people in this world, but they all live more easily than their mothers. My mother sees things too clearly, but she doesn't want to see them too clearly. It must be difficult for her to feel happy in her heart.She was already like this a long time ago, and no one can force her to change. This is her own life principle, and it is also the noose she put on herself.Angela didn't understand why her mother was willing to do this.

Paul returned to his room after eating, and Miss Scarlett's sharp eyes were useless as the door of his room was closed, and when she looked at her mother again, she regained her softness.At this time, my mother called someone and asked them to take her back to the room to rest.Although Angela had no intention of going to sleep at this time, she still went back upstairs with a full stomach of doubts.It seemed that Mama and Miss Scarlett were going to discuss something again, and it was a pity that I couldn't eavesdrop.

The servants were all sent out, and although Langli was sure that even if they were here, they would automatically become deaf with ears, she waited until the servant closed the door of the living room before she spoke: "Scarlett, is that child disrespectful?" Do you like it?"

Scarlett knew that she was asking about Paul, and she was so annoyed that she was so busy trying to cheer herself up that she forgot that there were other people at that table.But the lies that were spread out for convenience cannot be taken back, and her expression is indeed very strange to people who don't know the truth, so she can only laugh and say: "No, I like that child very much, but there is It was a bit too naughty at the time, which made people worry.”

"Really? Boys at this age are naughty enough. I've overthought, sorry." Lan Li didn't seem to be completely convinced, but she still wisely stopped talking about this topic. Scarlett thanked her for her understanding, But I also feel that it's a bit tragic that Disson can't enjoy this kind of preferential treatment.

Lanli was very clear about the goal of the training. Scarlett only needed to be able to make it look like the real one, so she just had to follow what she said.Although it's true that a week can't have a big effect on people's changes, Lan Li's arrangement is obviously because she doesn't want her to be too much affected by the north.She felt that Lan Li was too worried about this, not because she would not be affected, but because she didn't care about the influence.For Scarlett now, as long as she doesn't talk about those topics that slander the south, she can have a good conversation with any northerner.She understands that this kind of change is just a castle on the quicksand, and she can overcome her natural aversion to the "Yankees" who are almost prejudiced, but she is always a Southerner through and through, and the land in the South and everything that grows out of the land are Holy, if any northerner dared to show contempt for it, she would never tolerate it.Unfortunately, most southerners don't have this idea, and they are destined not to understand it.During the reconstruction period, she only did business with the northerners against her will to survive. At that time, she also hated the northerners, but no one understood, and the resulting isolation made her terrified. She believed that "Scarlett had something she had to do" instead of supporting her association with the Yankees and Republicans. Her words Scarlett would never forget: "These people robbed us, tortured us, and starved us, Brought us so much... I can't forget it, I never want to forget it. I won't let my little Beau forget it, I'm going to teach my grandson to hate these people, if God let me live, I will And to teach my grandson's grandson to hate these people." "Nor do I want to force myself to conform to circumstances, and I would never want them to help, if that means the Yankees."The strongest question in her words echoed in her mind at this time, "Scarlett, how can you forget"?She hasn't forgotten these, of course she can't forget them, but what's the use of remembering them?She needed the Yankees' help, even though it was the Yankees who had taken Rhett.She had comforted herself that not all the Yankees were bad, but what the southerners hated was not any specific person, but the "Yankees" as a whole, and then developed to the whole northern land.Hate is exclusive, but the exclusiveness of the southerners made them close themselves, hiding in their hard shells like nautiluses and dreaming, and it was not until the war broke out that they really woke them up—of course not everyone, there are many people still Unwilling to wake up and accept the reality - "not enterprising, conceited", Rhett's mockery of the southerners is appropriate.Still, he went to war, for the honor of the South.The culture of the South has penetrated into the soul of every bloody Southerner, whether consciously or unknowingly.Southerners say that only in this way can one be a true Southerner.

But Scarlett now had doubts about this statement that had become a Southern tradition.She came to the north and saw the factories in the north. Although it was only for a short time, the power represented by the machines deeply shocked her heart.She immediately realized that the northerners' victory in the war was not a gift from God. When the steel monster encountered bold words, the decency that the southerners worked hard for was crushed by its sharp teeth.In fact, those steel monsters themselves are harmless, if no one comes to start them.If northerners can manipulate them, why can't southerners?Rhett said there wasn't a decent iron foundry, lumber mill, coal mine, or iron mine in the South. Isn't that the fault of that damned tradition?If Southern men had the brains to put their money in iron ore instead of gray braids, Southern women wouldn't spend so much money just to stand up to Confederate martyrs—every day One is their relatives - the tombstones burst into tears.

While Scarlett was learning etiquette, she let her mind run wild, but she firmly grasped her expression and did not show any signs of distraction. Lanli didn't notice anything, and she still passed on the northern customs she knew in detail. .Seeing Lan Li's peaceful and serene face, Scarlett gradually gained the courage to talk to her about Deason.She knew that Lanli was a southern lady in the traditional sense, while Deason could be regarded as a typical representative of the northern culture she first explored. Such two completely different people had their destiny collided because of the war, just like two people who originally coexisted peacefully. The parallel lines of the two were accidentally intertwined, but since the moment they intersected, they have gradually drifted away.Scarlett wanted to help them, because of Rhett, because they should be together, because the South and the North shouldn't be so far apart even though the cultural and historical divide between them is not so easy to bridge.Forget it, there's no need to make it so lofty, she was just moved, and it has nothing to do with the big problem of the estrangement between the North and the South.But before she could speak, Lan Li suddenly got up and went to the library. When she came out again, she held a strange-looking book in her hand. Looks like old paper.

"I really didn't expect to find this." Facing Scarlett's questioning eyes, Lan Li did not hide her surprise, "I mean our family history. The part I found was after my family traveled to the north. Written notes. Although it is a bit old, it is still very comprehensive. You can read it. In fact, you already know almost what you need to learn. After all, men all over the world have so many demands on women, and the rest is simple Yes, just look at it and remember.”