Continuation of "Gone with the Wind"

Chapter 4 In front of Meili's tomb

The gray cold wind whistled like countless pigeons flapping their wings, rolled up the fallen leaves scattered on the ground, and held a grand dance on its own; the gloomy sky was like the face of an angry old man, At any moment there would be a storm full of fury like a lesson to a child who has run into trouble; there was no one on the street except a carriage that looked new and was slowly rolling over the uneven road, and Scarlett could feel it. The lack of strength and the occasional bumps transmitted from the ground along the wheels to her body.

She was originally the kind of person who would not be affected by the environment, but at this moment, thinking of the purpose of her trip, she felt a sadness deeper than the scene of late autumn in front of her.

She doesn't like to recall, because she doesn't think there is anything good in the past, so she keeps looking forward, rushing forward, and at the same time looks down on her old friends who are always addicted to the past. Even if it is fine, can the past come back by itself?But since the death of Meilan and Meili, since Rhett's attitude towards her became icy cold, and since she found that all the familiar people have become strange and alienated from her, she has vaguely realized that her thoughts may be It was wrong, but she didn't know where she was wrong.There was no one right now to share her pain, no one to share in the years of hardship that she was proud to have finally made it through.How good it was before, at least there was Rhett, his ridicule and teasing were all about his deep concern for her, allowing her to do what she wanted freely; and Melly, her gentleness and tenacity supported her.But now, Rhett has been injured by her, and Melly is also buried in the ground. The person she loved and the person who loved her are gone, and she can only rely on herself.

"Madam, here we are." The driver's voice without emotion interrupted her thoughts.She took a deep breath, feeling the cold air pouring into her body, and exhaling it warmed, and the white clouds flew straight like birds.She got out of the car, paid the coachman for money, and walked to the cemetery alone.

Where is Meili's tomb?The rows of tombstones in front of me are very neat, like the phalanx of the Yankee army, showing off their might, declaring their occupation of life.But in her eyes, they all look the same, the same ugly, and the same don't care about being ugly.Scarlett held back her psychological discomfort, and scanned the words on the tombstone with her eyes.I finally found it. Next to Mei Lan's tomb, on a tombstone that was obviously newer than the others, was Melanie?Wilkes' name, there are many bouquets of flowers left by the people who visited the tomb.Scarlett walked over gently, as if Melly had just fallen asleep and was afraid of waking her sweet dreams.

She bent down quietly and put the golden chrysanthemum in her hand in front of the tomb, but she didn't stand up immediately.She kept this uncomfortable position, folded her hands on her chest, and made a sincere confession to God for the first time in her life.

"God, I don't ask you to forgive my crimes, because my crimes can't be burned cleanly by the fire of hell. The only good friend of my life is buried in the tomb. She is a rare good person in the world, but But I always laughed at her and cursed her to die early, just because I was stupidly infatuated with her husband. But she never had doubts about me, loved me wholeheartedly, and supported me to do everything I wanted to do. She is so fragile, but she is much braver than me. She didn't do anything wrong, but you took her away early. I can't question this fair sentence, I know you are punishing my selfishness and stupidity , let me live alone in the world to atone for my sins. I only ask for your mercy, so that her holy soul can go to heaven and never have sorrow. Even if I have to go to hell after death, I am also willing."

After confessing to God, Scarlett felt a little exhausted. After all, she had just recovered from a serious illness. Dr. Meade repeatedly emphasized that she could not go out in the near future to avoid the cold, but she ignored these and continued to confess to Melly.

"Melanie? Wilkes, my only good friend in this life, no, in fact, I don't deserve to be your friend at all, but you have always embraced me with your kindness, fought side by side with me, and supported me wholeheartedly, Love me. And what the hell have I done, I've been cheating on you, I've been hating you because of Ashley, I've been cursing you in my heart to die sooner, I'm the worst woman. But now, you really leave me But when I left, I felt sad. You can blame me if you want, I didn't deserve your love, but you gave me so much, and let me finally understand who the person I really love is, at all Not Ashley, but Rhett, as you said. But Rhett is gone because I was too stupid to understand him, and he left me with my heart broken. Melly, What should I do, how can I win back his heart?"

Suddenly, she felt that she shouldn't disturb Meili because of her own affairs, so she immediately changed her words and said, "I'm sorry, Meili, I shouldn't make you worry about me because of this kind of thing. Before you leave, I promise Thank you, take good care of Ashley and Xiaobo, and treat Ritter well, I remember, I will help Ashley's business without letting him know, let Xiaobo go to Harvard, and try to get Ritter back Heart, love him well, don't worry. Meili, my friend, may you bless me."

After finally finishing what she was holding back in her heart, Scarlett felt that the big stone that had been weighing on her heart had been lifted away.She wanted to straighten up, but she didn't expect that the long time of bending over and confessing had exhausted her physical strength that hadn't fully recovered. She felt a golden light buzzing in front of her eyes like a bee flapping its wings, and then fainted. past.