mediocre novelist

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At this time, even Hong Kong black conscience Nakahara Nakahara has finished working overtime. I thought that Dazai likes to fish so much, he should have left work early, so I called him and told him that I would not be able to return to Yokohama after a while, and let him Help tell Odasaku and the others

"Are you really going to adopt/adopt/child/child/?" It can be heard from his tone that he is interested in this matter, "What kind of child is it?"

"No, I confiscated/adopted/the child." I said, "Well...the matter is a bit complicated, I'll tell you about the orphanage after the investigation is done."

"These days when you don't come back, I will be bored if there are no surprises." Dazai's tone couldn't tell if he was really regretting

"Don't worry about that." I showed a relaxed smile. I didn't judge the authenticity of the other party's words. He was very happy to say that I was already happy, which showed that he still had at least a sliver of hope for this world.

"why?"

"You will receive manuscripts in the past few days. Let's explore the world of words, Mr. Dazai, there is a treasure that does not shine at the end of the road."

"The kind of adventure where the rest time is spent on suicide?" Dazai asked with a light smile

"...Don't get hurt all over again." I sighed

"Then my teacher, Su, you should come back sooner. In this way, maybe my body will be less injured?"

After hanging up the phone, I sat on the sofa, touched my pocket but couldn't find a cigarette, and then I remembered that I had quit smoking for a long time

I used to smoke when I was irritable, and drink heavily when it was severe.At that time, I thought that everything in this world was bleak and dull, and there was no fun at all

It takes me only a few days to master what ordinary people need to practice hard for decades

There is no doubt that I have a talent that most people in this world don't have

But my extraordinary talent brought me more than praise. I was feared and excluded by everyone, but at the same time, I was respected and loved

In the end I can only be alone

I can't feel the fatigue and joy of learning one thing. All things bring me the same feeling. I gradually find that I am no longer interested in this world.

What else can I do?

If I was full of love for everything when I was young, then it is completely different when I grow up, and only beauty can attract my attention.Of course, no matter how reluctant you are, it won't take long before the throbbing when you meet a beauty will dissipate, and there will be no more ripples in your heart

It can be said that I was terrible at that time. If something new and novel that I had never seen suddenly appeared in front of me, if I became interested, it would be considered a crime. accept

——That's why my father resolutely opposed my going into the other world, and didn't even disclose the information of the other world to me at that time. If I walked into that world in that state, I would only gain more than I lost

Fortunately, I was disciplined by my parents. I was restrained in such a bad way in the past, and I can still be called "kind" in the eyes of people who don't know the truth.

To learn those things that are not interesting, to see the scenery that is not interesting.It doesn't make me happy to do this, but as long as it kills time, as long as it gives me a false umbrella... that's enough

I can't let my parents worry about me, can I?Even a rotten guy like me has someone he wants to protect

I have read many poems and books and seen many famous paintings.I only used pen to describe fantasy when I was a child, and I have no patience to look at pen and paper when I grow up

At that time, I was like the weeds on the barren plain. I could only watch the sun rise and set day after day. There were no other creatures around me, and I could only wait for my own withering.

Until the arrival of the system, I was attracted by the unknown displayed by the system, and finally brought up the pen again

——I met Odasaku later and was healed by him?Embrace the world again?

Unfortunately, no

no one reached out to me

no one

My parents couldn't understand my embarrassment, so they had to use their own methods to restrain me from doing things that I would regret

Oda Saku couldn't save me either, he could see me clearly but he couldn't save me

I got the supernatural ability to change the "unknown" in the next second, this is the real reason for my relief

When my parents found out that I was different, their expressions were guilty and worried, but they still held up their smiles and stroked my head to comfort me

I know that there are always people around me who are worthy of my sacrifice, so even when the beast inside is roaring fiercely, I will still pretend that nothing has happened

After I got the supernatural power, everything was different. At that time, I felt like I was "reborn". I quit smoking and drinking, and wrote books every day.

Maybe it's the influence of different abilities, or maybe I am finally willing to look directly at this cruel and beautiful world, and I have found a reason for me to live

I struggled out of that swamp

——On that night, I met Osamu Dazai

His eyes were cold and empty. Before becoming a Hong Kong gangster cadre, he had planned several "famous" cases, and he was an existence that even his colleagues would be afraid of.

Seeing Osamu Dazai so disgusting and fearful to outsiders, I have nothing but pity for him

The same pain, the same no one to save, want to save yourself but hate it, want to ask for help, but others don't understand

Osamu Dazai is similar to me, but also the opposite

At that time, I was a little more restrained than him, and he was far smarter than me①. In his eyes, it seemed that there was nothing to hide. The meaning of appearing in front of him was to wait to be analyzed and evaluated by him, and then discarded.

"Disqualification in the World" can eliminate all abilities, I can't solve his pain like I can solve my own pain

But I still want to save him, no matter how much time and energy it takes, I want to hold an umbrella for him in the rain

"En? What?" Ango Sakaguchi, who was the last to arrive, took the manuscript handed over by Osamu Dazai, "Dazai, did you write the book?"

"I didn't write it, it was written by Gensei." Osamu Dazai lowered his eyes, his tone was a little lost, he took a sip of green tea

After reading it carefully, Ango Sakaguchi put the manuscript on the table. He pushed his glasses and thought for a few seconds before saying, "This character is based on Dazai you? You are very similar."

"It can only be said that we are very similar." Osamu Dazai stared quietly at the glass in his hand, it is not filled with brown liquor like in the past

...It's not like the past.Osamu Dazai's eyes are dim

That's right, the current Yuansheng is nothing like the past Yuansheng, he has completely struggled out of the stinky quagmire, he even wants to pull me out

really......

The author has something to say:

①: There are deletions, the original sentence is a comment I saw in a certain video of Linghou cp, the source can't be found: "I was a little smarter than you at that time, and she was far more gentle than me"

Guess, did Yuan Sheng come back alive in the end?

Speaking of which, I just wanted to write a sand sculpture novel

Almighty male lead→Wouldn’t it be boring to live like this→If he is truly omnipotent, he will hate the world instead→Suga · Dazai No. [-] · Yuansheng

...emmmmm

edited

edited again

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