[Comprehensive] How to kill a rabid dog gently

Yuzuki

After Dazai Osamu disappeared, Akutagawa Ryunosuke had a very difficult time.He didn't want to believe that Osamu Dazai really died in the mission, and the goal he was trying to pursue came to an abrupt end, but if Osamu Dazai really didn't die, another kind of anger made him suffer even more—he was abandoned by Osamu Dazai .

He is like this, always silent, always melancholy, nervously thinking over and over again about the aborted ideal or the possibility of being denied, fueling the fire in his chest again and again, making the resentment burn more intensely.

The flame was so hot that he could hardly think about other things. It wasn't until the snow fell that year that he realized that winter had come for a long time.

February

Akutagawa had a dream last night, but he didn't remember anything when he woke up.

The winter hadn't passed yet, and he was inexplicably anxious about it. Occasionally, Ryunosuke Akutagawa would think that the sound of falling snow was too noisy, making him unable to concentrate on thinking, such absurd thoughts.

Regrettably, no one can destroy the order of seasons, including him naturally, so Akutagawa can only follow the slow flow of time patiently, and follow behind it.

But it was too slow, it was really too slow, the anger that once occupied his entire field of vision finally began to fade away little by little, and finally those unwillingness and resentment were burnt into crystals, like something that was always red and hot, but always fused together with the heart tin nugget.

Although the pain was still warm, things he had been trying to ignore inevitably emerged from the ashes of the old.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke had the same dream again.

Forgetting this time can no longer be his excuse.

Yayoi

It was night when he woke up, the snow had stopped falling, Akutagawa seemed to be driven by a nightmare, and suddenly opened the box hidden in the deep part of the closet, and the white fabric was exposed in his sight, it was still warm and soft, as if He has no complaints about Akutagawa's deliberate neglect.

For a second, he suddenly felt unbearable, and he left there, crashing into the stillness of midnight.

Akutagawa thought that he probably wanted to run away, in fact he had been doing this all the time, he stopped going to the apartment where she lived, stopped eating sweet things, tried to isolate everything with her from his life, But he forgot that it was because he was too clear and unforgettable that he could avoid them one by one in this way.

The gentle and sad voice of the person in the dream is still in my ears.

"Akutagawa-kun, maybe you will also experience confusion and hesitation..."

Then, her smile gradually brightened.

"But even then, don't stop—leave the past behind and keep going."

The winter in his eyes is full of traces of her, but when he walked into the depths of this winter, he found that there was no one there.

Except for himself.

While it cannot be accelerated, time cannot be stopped by human will.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke's winter is about to flow through his fingers.

Then, spring came.

Yuzuki

Osamu Dazai received a postcard from Sumiya that spring.

When sending it out, she also had no way of knowing where Dazai would be in the corresponding season, so she left the first one in their shared home, and the address and time of each posting were attached to it. The end of a postcard, the one in Dazai's hand is already the fifth one.

On the back of this postcard was the scene of Yae Sakura and Hina Matsuri, Dazai stared at it for a while before turning to the other side.

Cheng first made seasonal greetings, talking about the temperature and rain, and then she talked about some trivial and interesting things. She never felt boring when talking about these things, probably because everyone can feel them, and she really loves and cherishes them. everything.

Cheng never mentioned any dark, cold or sad things, as if there had never been a parting, she really wrote this postcard when the cherry blossoms were in full bloom, and sent it from the distant spring breeze.

Finally, she said at the end.

"Dazai, I look forward to meeting you when summer comes."

Dazai sighed slowly.

"Summer, next is summer..."

Not only summer, she also said that maybe she will see him again in autumn, winter and spring.

Although Osamu Dazai knows better than anyone else, she has been sleeping in the icy sea forever.

Satsuki

Osamu Dazai would occasionally find a figure similar to hers in the crowd, and whenever such a moment struck, he would drop everything in his hand and chase after that figure.

Every time he catches her up, but every time after he catches up, Dazai realizes that this back figure is not like her at all.

He still carried a complete suicide manual with him, still committed suicide on a whim, and at the same time, he failed to quit the bad habit of looking for her in the crowd.

Hope—don't worry—disappointment, Osamu Dazai went through this process repeatedly, mustering courage again and again, and being injured again and again.

As if he had forgotten how cowardly he tried to avoid the pain in the past.

water without moon

The postcard of this summer is the pattern of wind chimes and fireworks display.

Dazai Osamu did not rush to read it, but picked up a pen and wrote on the blank space on the back.

"It's shameful not to reply all the time, Ah Cheng, but after all, I don't know your address, so let's write it here first."

"I, later left the port mafia and experienced a period of wandering... But now I found a pretty good place called Armed Detective Agency."

Dazai paused for a moment before continuing to write.

"Is this one step closer to your expectations?"

After finishing writing, Osamu Dazai finally read the postcard.

This time is also the same season greetings, the same trivia... But, there is one thing that has never happened before. In this postcard, Cheng mentioned parting for the first time.

"Dazai, when you read this, we must have separated. Perhaps our fate as lovers has to come to an end, but in the days to come, I will still miss you."

she says.

"But I still have something to tell you."

"Even though my body has gone to the other side, my soul is still traveling, maybe, I mean maybe, one day, I will return to where you are again."

"At that time, even if my appearance changes, please try to recognize me again."

"May we meet next fall."