Self-denial System [Rebirth]

Memento 2

A sound of footsteps came from far to near, clearly audible in the slightly empty cell.

Step by step, very light and slow, as if walking and relaxing.

Disciple Fu Yun, who was waiting at the door, listened to the sound of footsteps for half an hour before finally waiting for someone who came out slowly.

"Master, you are here."

Gu Jingyin didn't answer, but just nodded slightly.

Hearing this, several people stepped forward and planned to lock the cell again.

Gu Jingyin suddenly turned around: "There is no need to lock it."

Several people raised their heads with puzzled expressions.

"He's dead." Gu Jingyin said five words without a tone.

Hearing this, several people looked at each other in blank dismay.

Gu Jingyin suddenly laughed, and said slowly to himself: "This last trick is really powerful, I didn't even expect it..."

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The dome of the main hall is wrapped with intricate dark red lines, dotted with silver gemstones here and there, like stars in the dark night; the stone pillars around the main hall are surrounded by strange and complicated patterns, and occasionally a few small crimson flowers bloom between the patterns.

Dozens of men dressed in ochre-colored clothes stood on both sides of the main hall. The dark red robes seemed to be stained with blood after being slaughtered for a long time, making the already gloomy hall even more depressing.

In the center of the hall sat a man with a gloomy expression and bowed his head in silence.

In front of the hall stood two groups of women, with black hair hanging down their shoulders and white clothes stretching across the floor.

Gu Jingyin slowly raised his head, his fingers slowly pinched five deep marks on the sandalwood armrest, and his tone was still cold in the cold weather: "What are you doing here?"

Su Qiyue saluted, and said in a gentle tone: "Su Qiyue of Cangxue Mountain, come to welcome my husband back to the mountain."

Gu Jingyin put his arms on the armrests on both sides, slowly crossed his hands in front of him, leaned his upper body on the back of the chair, and said in a low voice: "He is already dead."

Su Qiyue didn't raise her head when she heard the words, her tone was still calm: "I know, that's why I came here specially to pick him up."

Gu Jingyin didn't speak, his right hand tightly held the knuckles of his left hand, almost cutting off the knuckles.

"I know that if he comes here, it is absolutely impossible for him to go back properly. So I implore Sect Leader Gu to be lenient at this time and allow me to take him away."

Gu Jingyin said: "What qualifications do you have?"

Su Qiyue's face is still peaceful, her voice is even more peaceful, she doesn't care about the expression of the person in front of her at all: "Mu Chen is my husband who is about to get married, and the master of Cangxue Mountain. Considering you, Sect Leader, I am even more qualified to do so."

Gu Jingyin's eyes were gloomy, and the knuckles in his palm suddenly made a dislocation sound.

Could it be that everyone in this world is qualified to take him away, but I am the only one who is not qualified to keep him.

Gu Jingyin's chest seemed to be clogged with blood, and he was so sleepy that he couldn't speak.

There was only silence in the hall.

Silence from dawn to dark.

The sunlight outside the hall gradually dimmed, the sun set and the moon rose, the sky turned from dark yellow to azure blue, and the few scattered stars were gradually hidden by the mist.

"it is good."

Gu Jingyin's voice was hoarse, and he said a word to her.

Su Qiyue calmly replied: "Thank you, Master Gu, for your understanding."

At this time, it was another year of cold winter, when the wind and snow were swaying, two groups of women specially dressed in white walked slowly in the night, like a long plain onyx.

The plain onyx belt gradually drifted away in the snowy night, and finally drifted into the sky.

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"Master, that woman is the only one who can be in charge in Cangxue Mountain now, why did the master let her go? If he took the opportunity to detain her, wouldn't Qingluan, who is weak now, be included in his bag? Isn't the headmaster's long-cherished wish for many years..."

Gu Jingyin sneered: "A long-cherished wish?"

What is my wish?Is it to annex Qingluan?

ridiculous.

I used to think that since he has so many other things worth caring about in this world, he should destroy all of them, so that he would have no other reason not to come back to me.

But I never thought that for the so-called ridiculous "freedom", he would rather choose death than me.

Gu Jingyin got up from his seat and walked slowly to the gate of the palace.The flying snow outside the house was profuse, occasionally fell into the hall, and instantly turned into a puddle of water.

Seeing this, the other disciples in the hall stopped talking and remained silent for a while, when suddenly someone asked in a low voice: "Master Xu, you really care about that Mr. Xu..."

Gu Jingyin said: "I care about it very much. I hate him to the bone."

The last four words seemed to be difficult to speak out with clenched fists, and the voice was trembling.

Gu Jingyin always felt a dull pain in his heart, which was so painful that he was bleeding.It wasn't until this moment that I finally realized that the original feeling was hatred.

hatred.

He gritted his teeth with hatred, pierced his heart, and burned his bones.

"You all go out." Gu Jingyin's voice was hoarse.

When everyone heard the words, they all left silently and disappeared into the snowy night.

Gu Jingyin slowly raised his head, sporadic snowflakes stuck to the ends of his hair.Stretching out his hand in the air, a snowflake fell into his palm.

Gu Jingyin slowly watched it melt in his hand, and slowly clenched his fist again.

The tighter the grip, the more blood seeped out of the fingers, and it dripped down on the floor.

The hatred became more and more intense, almost swallowing the entire heart.

He hates, hates that person.

Ten years ago, at Mochi Peak, I wanted to tell that person that I knew what happened to Liu Zhen and I didn't blame him, but that person didn't even give me a chance to explain it; seven years ago, I found that person again after trying my best. , but that person would rather die than stay by his side for a moment longer.

That person would rather believe one sentence of other people's nonsense than believe his own confession of hundreds or thousands of sentences.

That person would rather spend all his time taking on an irrelevant responsibility for someone else's entrustment than to be with himself with peace of mind.

My gentle words to him made him think it was a means; my imprisonment and oath of sovereignty to him actually strengthened his determination to leave.

If you let go, that person will never take the initiative to come back; but if you don't let go, that person will go further in extreme ways.

So what is the purpose of my ten years of hard work?

After waiting for ten years, I have waited for nothing except a decisive parting every time.

Nothing at all.

Gu Jingyin only felt that the hatred in his heart was burning like a raging fire, and even the bone-piercing wind could not extinguish it.

Now, I really have nothing.

Every time that person leaves, someone will stand up and criticize himself with righteous indignation, and someone will stand up and take him away justifiably.

And I seem to be the person in this world who is least qualified to have him.

The most unjustified person.

"Why..." Gu Jingyin gently raised his eyelashes, looked at the flying snow in the sky, reached out to catch a snowflake, and rolled it between his fingers, his trembling voice was inaudible in the howling north wind, "But you You said before that you want to be husband and wife with me...why do you still avoid me...why do you break your promise..."

The night's gust of wind suddenly became violent, blowing the snowflakes outside the house up and down indiscriminately, and also blowing away this incomplete sentence.

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total darkness.

No sound, no light.

Xu Mu returned to the darkness he was familiar with.

Only this time, he didn't have the strength to speak.

Tears were still on his face, and the sobbing could not be stopped.

[Because you sent a forced termination signal when opening the limit, the limit cannot be fully opened.Such behavior is a violation and you will be punished. 】

Xu Mu covered his face with his hands, he didn't want to see or hear anything anymore.

If the punishment is death, then let yourself die completely.

If he really died, it wouldn't count as cheating him again.

[After one hour, you will enter "Nothingness". 】

nothingness?

Xu Mu's heart trembled suddenly.

He vaguely remembered where he seemed to have heard this word.

Xu Mu rubbed his eyes, breathed a sigh of relief, and recalled it carefully in his mind.Many years ago, Su Boling seemed to have said to himself that punishment is to enter the realm of nothingness and repeat the painful memories of the past.

To suffer repeatedly in painful nightmares is a punishment that seems worse than death.

But Xu Mu didn't feel scary at all, but had another feeling from the bottom of his heart.

--happy.

The joy of being rescued from a desperate situation.

No matter how painful the memory is, it is also a memory. Since it is my own memory, there must be Jing Yin——

If only I could see him again—

As long as I can see him again, I can use any method.

I will never hurt him again, I will never leave him again, I will explain everything to him clearly, and I will listen to him explain everything clearly, I will never be suspicious of him because of what other people say, and I will never be jealous of him because of myself. With a single thought, he chose to leave completely.

Never again.

Xu Mu hugged his legs and buried his face in his arms, trembling all over.

It wasn't until now that he realized that he wasn't the wronged one at all.

Perhaps the person who is tempted first will be the one who is hurt the most.

【Do you regret leaving? 】

"I...probably..." Xu Mu replied sullenly, still without looking up.

[Remember, never doubt the person you love after hearing one side of the story.Because you love him, it is easier to be blinded...]

"What's the use of saying this now? Don't say it... Please don't say it anymore..." Xu Mu buried his head deeper into the crook of his knees.

[You feel that he has tried his best against you, but you have never thought that he did not tell you what happened to Liu Zhen that night. It was not because he wanted you to feel guilty about him, but because he was afraid that bringing it up again would make the relationship between the two of you worse. There is a gap between you, he doesn't want the past to affect your repaired relationship...]

"I told you to shut up, don't say any more... Please stop... what do you know? Don't you also guess? Shut up..." Xu Mu covered his face with his hands closed his ears, and took a breath.

Xu Mu kept this movement until he felt a strange change in his surroundings, then he opened his eyes and stood up.

I saw that I was wearing white clothes at the moment, standing in a small wooden house, outside the house was the quiet night and faint snoring.

Xu Mu turned around and found a young man in white lying on the couch in the room, who seemed to be sleeping soundly.

Xu Mu wanted to take a few steps forward to see clearly, but his eyes suddenly became sore.

That person, you don't need to get too close, you only need to take a look from a distance to recognize who it is.

He didn't expect the reunion to come so quickly, which caught him off guard.

I still look like I was dressed in white ten years ago, but my heart can no longer be the same as it was ten years ago.

Xu Mu took a deep breath, walked slowly to the side of the couch and sat down, and saw that the blood in front of the young man hadn't dried up, and there were still a few paw marks of the dreamer's soul on his clothes.

Xu Mu did not expect that his first painful illusion was not when he died or when he was injured, but when he saw him injured for the first time.

If you don't stand on the outside, you will never be able to see through your own heart.

Xu Mu sat quietly by the bed for a long while, reaching out to touch the boy's face.

He withdrew his hand abruptly.

it is true.

like real.

Xu Mu stood up abruptly, wanting to go out of the house, but slowly slid down the bed and sat on the ground.

Xu Mu covered his face with his hands, but he still couldn't suppress the soreness in his eyes. Two hot tears gushed out from between his fingers and slid down his arms.

[I remember that you were not such a person in the past. You never cried before your death. Why do you cry every now and then? 】

Xu Mu still covered his face and was speechless.

[Okay, I'm just going to say the last sentence again.Because this is "Nothingness", the functions of the system are temporarily unavailable, which means that I will not appear again for a long time in the future. After the end of "Nothingness", the system functions will be re-enabled.I wish you happy. 】

Xu Mu covered his face and took a few breaths, trying not to stop crying before standing up.

I saw that the boy on the couch had already woken up.

Xu Mu quickly sat down, hugged him in his arms, and pressed him tightly against his chest.

Thin, small body, soft black hair, and a faint milky smell that belongs to children and teenagers.

Nothing is wrong.

This is his Jing Yin.

"Brother..." the person in his arm suddenly hummed softly in his arms.

Xu Mu's heart trembled when he heard it, and he let go of him.

"Is it senior brother..." The boy's voice seemed soft and waxy, as if he hadn't woken up.

"It's me..." Xu Mu tried hard to speak calmly, but his voice still trembled uncontrollably.

"It's me..." Xu Mu replied while reaching out to hug him, "Let me hug you..."

"There is a senior brother in this dream, so I would like to do it for a while longer." The young man obediently leaned back into his arms, and said slowly against his chest.

When Xu Mu heard these familiar words, a bitterness suddenly filled his heart, very bitter.

Here, it was what he thought was a dream, but it was his own nothingness.

The young man leaned in his arms for a while, then suddenly reached out and touched his face: "Brother, do you miss that time too, otherwise, why would you come to this dream with me?"

"Yes."

Xu Mu hugged him tightly, fearing that he would disappear in the next moment, "I miss him very much, I miss him very much."

"Brother, do I really like holding you at this moment?"

"Yes."

"It's nice to be in your arms." The boy moved towards him again.

"Then don't leave forever." Xu Mu's hand holding the lapel of his shirt was trembling slightly.

The young man seemed to be taken aback when he heard the words, as if he didn't expect him to answer like this: "Really."

"It's...it's true." Xu Mu held the boy tightly in his arms with both hands, and buried his face in the soft hair behind him, "What I said is true, I want to spend my whole life... I can hug you like this..."

"Senior brother." The young man grabbed his headband with one hand and slightly pulled his face down, "This must be a dream."

Then he closed his eyes, his eyelashes trembled slightly, and kissed the corner of Xu Mu's lips.

Xu Mu didn't push him away like ten years ago, but closed his eyes and deepened the kiss.

But the young man was obviously stunned, pushed him away, turned over and got out of bed, and muttered: "I miss senior brother, I should wake up after sleeping for so long, this dream is really too long, if you don't wake up again, senior brother, you Just can't wait for me."

Turning around while talking, he said with a smile: "Brother, don't be nervous, when I wake up, we two can meet in reality."

Xu Mu sat by the bed and looked at him quietly, and smiled at him, "Jing Yin, stay here."

"Stay here?" The young man smiled when he heard the words, and continued, "Although I like both the former senior brother and the current senior brother, the former senior brother will only reject me, and he can't do what I want to do in my dream... ..."

Xu Mu didn't wait for him to continue, but got up and hugged him horizontally, and put him back on the bed: "Whatever you want, I will do it with you..."

After Xu Mu finished speaking, he stroked the boy's hair, leaned over and kissed the boy's lips.

[You really want to harm minors like this? 】

Xu Mu: ...Didn't you agree not to show up again...

[I just can't stand it. 】

Xu Mu: He's already 16 years old, can't he?

【…】

Xu Mu: I will teach him very gently.

【…】

Xu Mu kissed him for a moment, let go of him, stood up and asked, "Is this what you like?"

There were still a few red marks on the young man's fair face. After hearing this, he was obviously taken aback, and then nodded: "Mmm..."

Seeing his appearance, Xu Mu bent down and kissed his cheek, earlobe, and then down kissed his neck and collarbone.

He finally knew what it felt like, and he finally understood why Gu Jingyin, like himself now, couldn't help but kiss the person under him all over.

Because I like it, I like it very much.

I like it to my heart.

"Do you like these too?" Xu Mu raised his head and asked softly.

In the boy's clear eyes, he seemed a little shy at this moment, but he still nodded.

Xu Mu smiled, bowed his head and kissed his face again, and whispered in his ear: "You have grown up, I will teach you to do what adults do."

Hearing this, the young man's cheeks instantly turned pink.

Xu Mu stretched out his hand to touch it, and said with a smile, "Why is it so hot?"

The boy hurriedly shook his head: "No, no."

Xu Mu closed his eyes and kissed his hot cheek.The tender skin and soft lips touched each other, and Xu Mu's heart trembled more and more.

It was a feeling he had never experienced before.

A mixed feeling of bitterness and euphoria.

The bitterness of nothingness and the joy of finding it again.

Xu Mu kissed enough, and asked in his ear: "Do you feel it?"

The young man was still lying upright. Hearing this, he stumbled and said, "What... what feeling..."

Xu Mu smiled, and touched down his clothes with his right hand: "Here, do you feel anything here?"

The boy quickly turned over and sat up, dodging his hand in a panic: "No...no, no."

Xu Mu hugged him again, patted his back lightly, and kissed his earlobe: "Don't be nervous..."

Only then did the boy stop fidgeting, and whispered in his arms, "Mmm..."

"Since you haven't felt it yet, then you can kiss me." Xu Mu said softly.

"Will it be?" Xu Mu let go of him, looked into his eyes and asked.

"Well... yes..." The young man's face was already flushed red at the moment.

Xu Mu smiled, lay down with his arms around him, and said to him, "Then it's you."

The boy obediently climbed up on him immediately, and pecked his face.

"Not enough." Xu Mu looked at him with a smile, and said softly, "Again, just like I did to you just now."

The boy nodded and kissed his lips again.

Xu Mu immediately bit his lower lip lightly to prevent him from leaving, put his arms around his body to prevent him from getting up, and said vaguely: "Don't stop..."

The lips and teeth are intertwined, and the hair is intertwined.

The white clothes of the two were in a mess at this time, and their belts and hair ties were scattered all over the bed.

Xu Mu reached out to touch his lower body: "Now, do you feel it?"

The boy reflexively wanted to hide again.

Xu Mu held him tightly with one arm to prevent him from dodging, while the other hand moved back and forth unscrupulously inside his lower garment.

The boy's cheeks were still flushed just now, but at this moment they suddenly turned pale, as if he was frightened.

"No...don't...don't..." The young man quickly grabbed his wrist with both hands, trying to pull his hand out from under his shirt, but when he couldn't pull it out, he raised his head again, looking at him in horror.

Xu Mu sat up and kissed him while moving: "Why not."

"Don't be like this...no need..." The boy turned his face to avoid him and said intermittently.

"You don't like it anymore?" Xu Mu asked in his ear.

Hearing this, the young man hurriedly shook his head: "I don't... like..."

Xu Mu smiled: "In the end."

The boy nodded, and whispered: "I like it..."

Pausing for a while, he continued: "As long as the brother does it to me... I like it..."

Hearing this, Xu Mu rubbed his face with the other hand: "Why are you so cute?"

Xu Mu stopped what he was doing, untied his shirt, and asked, "Now, do you feel uncomfortable here?"

Following his movements, the boy involuntarily backed away: "It's...a little..."

"Don't hide." Xu Mu took his arm and pulled him in front of her, "I'll help you, it won't be uncomfortable if I help you out."

"Lie down." Xu Mu said gently to him.

The boy hesitated, and wanted to continue shrinking to the corner.

"Be obedient." Xu Mu pinched his face.

Once the boy's face was pinched, he couldn't hide, so he lay down tremblingly.

Xu Mu smiled, leaned over and sucked his (**

The boy sat up abruptly.

Xu Mu had no choice but to raise his head again: "What's the matter with you?"

"No, no... nothing."

Xu Mu had no choice but to put on the gentlest tone and talk to him: "Let me tell you, you don't need to be nervous. You are already this old, and you can do these things long ago."

The young man wanted to say something, but he couldn't say anything: "But me... and senior brother... I can't... no... I... can't..."

Xu Mu said gently: "If you don't know it, I can teach you."

The boy's words became even more confusing: "It's not this...I...I don't, dare not...this, I'm afraid...afraid..."

Xu Mu smiled and said, "What are you afraid of? What are you afraid of?"

The boy knew that he couldn't speak clearly, so he stopped talking this time and just shook his head frantically.

Xu Mu had no choice but to sit up again, put his arms around him, and asked him softly, "Do you like me?"

The boy nodded: "Yeah."

Xu Mu stroked the young man's back up and down, and then continued softly: "Then...are you happy doing this with me?"

"Ah."

Xu Mu smiled: "Then you know, people who like each other will do these things."

The boy replied in a low voice: "Well... I know..."

Xu Mu patted him on the back: "Then what are you afraid of?"

The boy still lay on his chest, without answering.

Xu Mu continued to ask: "Is it because we are both men?"

The boy nodded.

After hearing this, Xu Mu pushed him away, looked down into his eyes, and said with a smile: "What's there to be afraid of? I won't let you suffer. Listen, I'll teach you a way. Wait a minute, don't Open your eyes and take me as your wife, how about it."

The author has something to say:

Let's post it under the car, the online review, let me study how to post it without being locked.