dreamer

Later, Ji Changsi left safely, which was not expected by Ji Ziyang at the beginning. He failed and lost to a secondary personality.

Not only did he fail to heal the guy in front of him, but he was tricked by a sub-personality.

When Wei Xi opened his eyes, Ji Ziyang just showed him a tired smile, and then went downstairs alone to light a cigarette.

From then on, for several days, Ji Ziyang seemed to be a different person, and his whole person became a little decadent.

Although he was still by Wei Xi's side every day, his words suddenly decreased. To Wei Xi, who didn't talk much at first, one was on this side of the house, and the other was on the other side of the house. I can't speak a few words all day.

It's not that Wei Xi didn't notice Ji Ziyang's change, but he only felt a little bit of joy at this change, because then he would have more time to miss Ji Changsi, he could hide in the room for a day without being disturbed by anything, he finally I have my own private space again.

However, although Ji Ziyang didn't talk as much as before, and his whole person became more and more quiet, his scorching gaze was still the same as before.

As long as Wei Xi stepped into his line of sight, he would stare at people intently, and sometimes he would even be frightened by Wei Xi, as if Ji Ziyang would pounce on him and eat him in the next second.

In fact, Ji Ziyang didn't have any beast fantasies about Wei Xi, he was just still immersed in the questions Ji Changsi threw him and couldn't extricate himself.

Does he really love Wei Jiale?

He examined Wei Xi over and over again, trying to find the answer from him.But after looking around, he still thinks that he loves Wei Jiale very much, but if he really loves him, then why is he still unable to fully accept this guy in front of him.

Later, when Xu Fei asked about the reason for Ji Changsi's appearance, Ji Ziyang suddenly remembered the original intention of talking with Ji Changsi.

Xu Fei looked at Ji Ziyang for a while, observed Ji Ziyang's state, and thought about the recent events, after much consideration, he finally suggested to Ji Ziyang, "Why don't you give Wei Xi to me, after all, you don't care about Wei Xi. ..."

But Ji Ziyang couldn't find a reason to let go for a while, "I want to see again..."

"When do you want to see it again? To see how powerful your little love rival is? Or to be jealous of Wei Xi? Or to worry about them seeing each other again?"

Ji Ziyang was suffocated when he heard the words, and didn't know how to answer.

"I know you still can't let go, but if you drag on like this, it won't do anyone any good."

Xu Fei's ultimatum kept echoing in Ji Ziyang's ears, making Ji Ziyang even more exhausted.

In the end how to do?

How to sort out this relationship?

Ji Ziyang was constantly troubled by these problems, and was finally defeated when he came home and saw Wei Xi sitting on the ground drawing.

He came behind Wei Xi and stopped him before Wei Xi turned her head.

"Don't look back, just keep drawing."

Saying this, Ji Ziyang sat behind Wei Xi, thinking of Wei Jiale when he was a child, imitating his appearance and leaning on Wei Xi's back.

Then Ji Ziyang felt Wei Xi's stiffness, this person was always like this, no matter how long he had known him, he would still resist any touch from Ji Ziyang.

So Ji Ziyang's heart became more tired in an instant, but he still calmed down patiently in a low voice, "I don't know what to do, let me lean on for a while, I'm a little tired."

He is really tired. In the past, Wei Jiale always liked to lean on him like this, which filled his heart with a sense of pride; he is the one Wei Jiale wants to rely on, and he is very important to Wei Jiale , that made him very proud.

But now he has become the guy who wants to rely on others, in fact, thinking about it carefully, even though it seemed that Wei Jiale was always relying on him back then, in fact, he also couldn't live without Wei Jiale.

After being away from Wei Jiale for so many years, he has changed a lot. He restrained his willfulness and tempered his character, but he always felt very tired. He knew that except in front of Wei Jiale back then, he had never been able to live like himself.

His mother said it, and Ji Changsi said it too, they thought he treated Wei Jiale as a toy.

But how can he explain his feelings clearly? He really didn't treat him as a toy, he just didn't know what to do to love him.

After an unknown amount of time, the guy being leaned on finally relaxed slowly.

Wei Xi moved slightly, and continued to write in the notebook with her head down.

"Wei Xi, talk to me."

"say what?"

"Whatever, talk about you, talk about work, you can talk about Ji Changsi, just don't be so quiet."

Wei Xi smiled when she heard this, "...what's the matter with you?"

"It's nothing." Ji Ziyang leaned against Wei Xi's back, his voice was muffled, "it's just a little dull."

"... Ah... Then, here you are."

Wei Xi straightened her back, turned over a page in the sketchbook in her hand, turned around and pushed Ji Ziyang down in front of her.

"I?"

"kindness."

Ji Ziyang looked at Wei Xi in confusion, "What do you mean?"

"Let's draw. When I'm bored, I draw."

Wei Xi blinked at Ji Ziyang, and handed him the pen, "Here."

"Don't, don't, don't... I paint, that's... the level is too high, you can't accept it."

Ji Ziyang quickly threw the pen and waved his hand, got up from the ground, and looked at the drawing papers hanging on the wall.Those are all Wei Xi's works, some have been published, and some are free to practice.

His eyes followed the rows of drawing papers and landed on the easel in the corner.

"You always cover it, why?"

"Because it's not finished."

"What did you draw?"

"…people."

"Who?"

Ji Ziyang turned his head to look at Wei Xi, but Wei Xi pondered for a moment and didn't speak.

Ah, Ji Ziyang understood, he remembered that Wei Xi said before that he couldn't draw a person.

"...Can I see it?"

Wei Xi hesitated, "Yes."

Ji Ziyang walked to the easel and lifted the white cloth on it, revealing a picture that was almost completed.

It was a simple half-length portrait, very finely drawn, every strand of hair was detailed, but the only thing left unfinished was the face.

It was a face with no facial features.

Ji Ziyang stared at the painting for a while, not knowing why, although he didn't know what Wei Xi saw in Ji Changsi's eyes, but he felt that this faceless portrait looked familiar.

"...How do I feel that I have seen him somewhere..."

Wei Xi smiled, "You've seen him before, didn't you say you've seen Chang Si?"

"Ah..." Ji Ziyang was stunned when he heard the words, and quickly coughed to cover up, "I, what I said, but this one looks... smaller, like a high school student..."

Wei Xi also froze for a moment, unconsciously a trace of wandering confusion appeared in his eyes, "Will it be?"

"Well, look at this dress, and the collar, it's very similar to a school uniform. It's very similar to my childhood shirt. It's also this kind of shirt."

"what…"

Wei Xi lowered his head, his eyes flickering, and he suddenly remembered the feeling that flashed in his mind when he was painting Ji Ziyang.

Once upon a time, he also said to Ji Changsi that Ji Ziyang is a bit like you.

And when he was drawing Ji Ziyang's eyebrows and eyes that day, Wei Xi also suddenly felt that the eyebrows and eyes on the picture were so similar to someone he couldn't draw...

"Is he fine?"

Just when Wei Xi couldn't help feeling confused in his heart, Ji Ziyang came to him and sat down.

"He treats you very well, right? Much better than me."

"…this…"

"What's wrong with it?" Ji Ziyang sighed, and asked Wei Xi seriously, "What's wrong with me?"

"You are not inferior to him in any way." Wei Xi thought for a while, then smiled lightly, "Actually, you are a bit alike."

"Me? With him? Stop making trouble."

"Just a little... Like, he hates you as much as you hate him."

... Well, why would Kiko Yang expect such a guy to be able to pay attention to the art of chatting?

"That's why you let me stay by your side?"

"What do you mean?"

"Because I am like him, so I obviously didn't like restoring my memory before, so I agreed to my request."

"No, you are a bit like him, but you two are incomparable." Wei Xi shook his head, continued to pick up the pen, and drew a few strokes on the sketchbook spread on the floor, "But you are a good person, not bad. .”

Ji Ziyang looked at Wei Xi, waiting for him to continue.

"We are friends, and I would like to help you."

Wei Xi drew a few strokes, then looked up at him and smiled, "Just like he treats me, because we are friends, he has been helping me."

Ji Ziyang raised his eyebrows, pursed his lips and shook his head.

This fool, he still doesn't understand, he thought Ji Changsi just regarded him as a friend.

Just like he and Wei Jiale, the guy in front of him who didn't have amnesia, had no way of knowing in the end, if Wei Jiale didn't have amnesia, would he have the same feelings for him.

And Wei Jiale back then would never know, but in fact, he had always liked him from the beginning to the end.

Ji Ziyang looked out the window and sighed.

Alas, it's all fate, it's just such a mistake.

Thinking of this, Ji Ziyang leaned over Wei Xi's body again, and leaned his head on his back.

Wei Xi pursed her lips helplessly, look, it is this kind of character that can do whatever she wants, especially like Changsi.

But thinking of this, Wei Xi smiled helplessly.

Ji Ziyang closed his eyes and asked him, "What are you laughing at?"

"It's nothing."

Wei Xi's voice was still light and ethereal, but the next words made Ji Ziyang's heart skip a beat.

"...I like leaning on him like this too..."

"…kindness?"

Ji Ziyang opened his eyes, straightened up and asked Wei Xi's back, "What did you say?"

"I said, I also like relying on Ji Changsi like you." Wei Xi didn't look back, and was still drawing in a mess on the notebook, but he didn't stop, "I'm afraid that Ji Changsi will be angry, and he will ignore him when he gets angry. I... so when he is angry, I will lean on his back... As long as he does this, he will not continue to be angry with me..."

After finishing speaking, Wei Xi turned around and smiled faintly at Ji Ziyang, "Just like you did just now."

A few understatement words, to Wei Xi, are just recounting the little memories between him and the person he likes.

However, for Ji Ziyang, such words unfortunately pulled his heartstrings again.

The sense of confusion that was very coincidental before reappeared, and he tried hard to think about everything he knew about the relationship between Wei Xi and Ji Changsi in his mind, and then pieced together some fragments of words.

"You also like noodles with vinegar?"

"Here you are! Breakfast was prepared by Ji Changsi for me."

"...I like leaning on him like this, too."

"As long as this is the case, he won't continue to be angry with me."

"Actually, you guys are kind of alike."

...Every personality has its reasons for its appearance, either the shadows and stimuli experienced in childhood, or the past experiences and traumas.

So, which indelible experience of Wei Jiale does Ji Changsi represent?

Suddenly, Ji Ziyang straightened his back, looked at the easel in the corner, and looked at the figure in front of him who bowed his head and painted with an unbelievable gaze.

He opened his mouth to say something, but he didn't know where to start.

Wei Xi continued to draw the picture in his hand, but couldn't see the bursts of red and white emerging from the face of the person behind him.

After an unknown amount of time, Ji Ziyang asked him again in a low voice.

"Wei Xi, tell me about Ji Changsi again."

"Didn't I say it many times?"

"Let's talk about it, what did his parents do?"

"...his dad was an engineer."

"...where's his mother?"

"...something like a strong woman."

"Ah...does he often cook you breakfast?"

"if it is possible."

"Is it all eggs and milk?"

"There will be other things too," Wei Xi thought for a while, "and give me candy."

Ji Ziyang nodded, although these are trivial things that are not surprising, but there are some settings, why do they look so similar.

"You said that Ji Changsi left you?"

"...Well, he changed schools for a while..."

"Why? Is he willing to leave you?"

"Because his parents are leaving, he has to go with them. Besides, there's no one who can't bear to part with me."

"so…"

Ji Ziyang rubbed his eyes, he felt a little sore in his eye sockets, "Then how did you all get in touch?"

"write a letter."

"write a letter?"

"Well, he'll write to me."

"..."

Ji Ziyang felt a little overwhelmed, but he still sniffed and tried to pretend that nothing happened, "Can you show me the letter he wrote to you?"

Wei Xi turned around and looked at Ji Ziyang incomprehensibly, "...why?"

"Nothing, just curious, can you show me?"

Wei Xi hesitated, as if he was in a difficult situation.

"Show me, I don't want to read the contents, just the envelope."

Wei Xi thought for a while, then got up and walked out of the studio.

Within a few minutes, he walked in with a storage box in his hands, and then put the box in front of Ji Ziyang.

Ji Ziyang looked at the box, then at Wei Xi.

Then under his gaze, Wei Xi opened the box, took out a letter from it, and handed it to Ji Ziyang.

"that's it."

Ji Ziyang looked at the letter, and couldn't help looking through the rest of the letters in the box. Indeed, each letter had a postmark with the recipient's address written on it.

It's just that when he saw the handwriting on the envelope, his heart was pulled tight for an instant.

"I, can I have a look at the letter?"

"...Just this letter, nothing else."

"Thank you."

There was no unnecessary expression on Wei Xi's face, she just felt that Ji Ziyang in front of her was a little baffled.

The moment Ji Ziyang saw the envelope, Wei Xi noticed that the man's hands were trembling; and when Ji Ziyang opened the envelope to take out a folded letter paper, Wei Xi saw that the guy's hands were trembling even more.

"Are you OK?"

Wei Xi was a little worried about him.

But Ji Ziyang didn't answer him right away, he just lowered his head, and then easily unfolded the strangely folded letter paper.

Such a move really surprised Wei Xi, because it was Ji Changsi's usual method of folding letters, and he taught him how to open them in person. If he didn't know how to open them, it would be easy to tear up the letter paper.

But Ji Ziyang spread out the letter paper easily, must it be because Ji Ziyang also knows this folding method?

Wei Xi looked at Ji Ziyang suspiciously, but Ji Ziyang didn't look up at him.

Ji Ziyang only focused on the letter in his hand, frowned again, then slowly folded the messy letter paper in a familiar way and stuffed it back into the envelope.

The folding method of the letter paper is very unique. Although there are creases everywhere on it, it is still difficult to restore it as it is without knowing how to fold it.

However, Ji Ziyang folded the letter paper smoothly and put it in the envelope, then sorted out the pile of letters, closed the storage box again, and pushed it in front of Wei Xi.

"...The handwriting is poor," Ji Ziyang sniffed, and tried to smile at Wei Xi, "It's far worse than your handwriting."

"nor."

"...It looks like a lot of effort, it's always written in a mess."

"It's not that bad."

"...At that time, I was lonely by myself. I...I mean Ji Changsi, I couldn't stay by your side."

"kindness…"

Wei Xi's eyes blurred for a moment, and he remembered the boy in the white school uniform and shirt who had appeared in the dream, and the voice that had sounded in the dream countless times.

'It's really hard to live alone...'

Wei Xi's eyes wandered away for a while, and she gradually came back to her senses, "It's okay...but as long as you can keep writing to me, it will be fine."

Hearing this, Ji Ziyang frowned visibly, but still tried hard to control his emotions, "Then what if... what if he doesn't write to you one day?"

"No, he won't."

"Are you so sure? You didn't worry about it before. He transferred to another school and left, maybe he forgot about you?"

"Don't worry, how could it be?" Wei Xi raised his head and smiled at Ji Ziyang, "Because he is Ji Changsi, he won't ignore me."

That smile was so bright, like Wei Jiale when he was a child, like the sunshine in spring, it hurt Ji Ziyang's eyes all at once.

"He said that no matter what happens, he will never want me."

"I believe in him."

Something shattered in an instant as Wei Xi's voice fell.

Once upon a time, the young Ji Ziyang took Wei Jiale's hand and swore with the other finger to the sky, "No matter what happens, I will never let you go."

Ji Ziyang couldn't hold on anymore, he ignored Wei Xi's inexplicable expression, quickly got up and hid in the bathroom, turned on the faucet, and covered his eyes.

It's embarrassing, he's quite a big man, but he's still so useless, crying like a child holding on to the table by himself.

Because I accidentally lost some precious treasure, even when I thought there was a chance to find it again, I became so powerless.

In the past, Ji Ziyang thought he knew everything, he knew he liked him, he knew he liked Wei Jiale, he knew they would be together, because he felt that they were made for each other.

Later, Ji Ziyang felt that he didn't know anything, because he didn't know if Wei Jiale would like him as much as he liked him.

But now Ji Ziyang felt that it didn't matter whether Wei Jiale liked him or not. He even felt that it didn't matter why Wei Xi liked who he was now.

Because he really can't compare to Ji Changsi, he really can't compare to the guy who has always been regarded as an enemy. He lost completely, and he lost speechlessly.

Because he finally knew who Ji Changsi really was, the figure he could never be against was the self who should never have left Wei Jiale behind.