1921

Wednesday, August [-]th sunny

Standing a few steps away from the hotel, I looked at the doorway with people coming and going, and didn't want to go in.

The night before yesterday, I suddenly received a call from my father, saying that my grandma celebrated her birthday today and asked me to come back.I didn't want to go back, but I said yes anyway.

Then I asked Lin Jian for leave, booked train tickets online, and then postponed the original appointment with Ye Aichen to move, at least until I went back to school.

Ye Aichen and I originally made an appointment to move our respective things from school to the rented house today, but a sudden phone call disrupted everything.Ye Aichen asked me if I wanted him to accompany me back, but I refused.If he wants to go home and have a look, of course I'd be happy for him to go with me, but if it's just to accompany me, then I don't think it's necessary.What do I need to accompany you?

I didn't get a bus ticket for the day, so I had to choose the night train.I staggered on the train all night, arrived in Nancheng around [-]:[-] in the morning, and then took a bus for about an hour to return home.After catching up on the bed for a while, I got up, took a shower, changed my clothes, and hurried to the hotel where the birthday banquet was held.

I wanted to go when the birthday banquet was about to start, but my father kept calling and urging me, so I had no choice but to run over with my sleepy body.

I didn't want to go in, and when I thought about going in, I would have to face all kinds of inquiries from relatives and my grandmother's disgusting expression, I felt my stomach hurt a little.

I sighed and walked in anyway.

I greeted my relatives with a smile, found my father and told him that I was here, and he asked me to go to grandma to celebrate her birthday.Grandma was sitting on a chair in front of the banquet, surrounded by people I knew and I didn't know were talking to her, presumably they were all auspicious words for birthday wishes.I walked over, called grandma, and then said a few birthday idioms I found on the Internet, and walked away consciously after finishing.

It's a bit ridiculous. When I was talking to her, people around me were praising her for having a filial grandson. She looked at me, then smiled and said some modest words to others politely.It's rare for her to smile at me, but it's a pity that there are people around who have to smile at me.I think she should hope that my mother and I will stay away from her and his son.

But I don't.

I think a little badly.

She doesn't want to see me, and I don't want to see her either.She doesn't want to see me, and I don't want to see her.She wants me to stay away from her, and I also want her to stay away from me.However, occasionally seeing her having to make up her mind like this makes me feel a little refreshed.

Anyway, I've had enough of seeing her face.

One day, I will no longer appear in front of her as she wished.But until then, bear with it.

I walked to a table of people I didn't know and found a seat and sat down. I didn't want to go to the seven aunts and eight aunts to see their faces.After confirming the time on the return ticket, I sat quietly on my seat and played with my mobile phone.

After the meal, after a while, I figured it was almost time, I went to my father and told him that I was going back to school.

"How long will you stay here, and you still have to eat tonight, so you go back now?" Dad said, his tone full of dissatisfaction.

I know that it's not that he is reluctant for me to leave, but that he thinks it's disrespectful to grandma that I've only been here so long and leaving so soon, and he's dissatisfied with this.However, I don't want to worry about his thoughts anymore.

"School is about to start, and there are still many things to prepare." I said.

Whether he likes it or not, I turn around and walk away, then take the bus to the station.

The bus started getting farther and farther away from the hotel, and my heart relaxed a lot.

I thought my life should be so depressing, but I still couldn't help but want to escape.

The car stopped and went, and I stood dangling in the car.In front of a red light, the driver braked. I couldn't stand still and bumped into the person next to me. I quickly apologized to him.

"Wu Zi?" The person next to me waved his hand and said it was okay, and then hesitantly called my name.Only then did I look up at the other party, and tentatively called out: "Wang Lerui?"

"It's really you," Wang Lerui was a little surprised, "I haven't seen you for a long time, almost four years."

I nodded.

I saw him before and thought he looked familiar, but I wasn't sure if he was Wang Lerui.He has grown taller, shed the childishness and youthfulness before, and became mature.And he also wears a pair of glasses, which he didn't wear when he was in junior high school, so I'm not sure for a moment.

I didn't know we were both going to the station until we both got off at the same station and walked in the same direction.

"I'm going back to school, so are you?" Wang Lerui was puzzled, and then explained to himself, "That's right, it's school time now."

After he and I lined up to collect the tickets, we walked towards our respective waiting areas.I was at Exit No. [-], he was at Exit No. [-], and the direction was just opposite.At the fork ahead, I still couldn't help but stop him. I wanted to ask him what he hadn't finished talking back then.I thought I forgot, but seeing him reminded me again.Although he may not remember it anymore, maybe this is the only chance, so I still want to ask.

"Oh..." Wang Lerui seemed to remember, "You are asking that..."

I thought his next words would be to tell me what that passage was about, but he changed the subject and asked if I still had contact with Ye Aichen.

I told him we were still in touch and were studying at the same university.

"Then you are really destined." He chuckled lightly, and then said, "Wu Zi, do you know what I thought of you in junior high school?"

"I don't know." I said.

"At that time...Actually, I really hated you." He said, "I was just like you, and my grades were in the middle and upper reaches, but every time you were in front of me. I asked myself that I was not worse than you, and even worse than you." You work hard, but you always beat me. Moreover, you often play with Wan Xinghua and Ye Aichen. Logically speaking, you should be behind me, but the fact is always the opposite. So , your grades were rarely lower than mine that time, I was actually a little gloating."

I didn't expect Wang Lerui to hate me. I thought that although I didn't get along well with others, I should be regarded as the kind of indifferent.It turned out that I was hated by people.

"Actually, I'm jealous of you. This is a very common mentality. When I see people who study better than me, I will be very envious and jealous. It will improve." Wang Lerui said indifferently, "Didn't you want to ask me what I wanted to say at the beginning? I can tell you now, what I actually wanted to say that day was 'Is it because you and Ye Ai Shen didn't focus on your studies? '."

I can't agree with this sentence. I think I didn't think about anything other than studying at that time, and I spent a lot of time studying with Ye Aichen.I can guarantee that I am studying very seriously, of course, Ye Aichen is too.

Seeing that I was not convinced, Wang Lerui said: "I don't know if you know, anyway, I think it's weird when I look at you two. You two have such a good relationship, it's not an exaggeration to say that you are conjoined twins. Even if they are best friends, but the relationship is so good, all kinds of greetings, eating and chatting with each other, don't you think it's strange that the two boys are so tired?"

Do I have a relationship with Ye Aichen?He and I are just in a normal relationship.Of course, maybe I rely on him a little unconsciously, but it's not as boring as Wang Lerui said.

Suddenly, Wang Lerui smiled viciously, and said: "I didn't understand it at the time, but after I went to college and learned a lot, I gradually understood. Actually, you two..." Wang Lerui leaned close to my ear and whispered to me Say, "Is it gay?"

Seeing his smile, I suddenly felt that he was very strange.

do i really know him

I don't understand at all what he said.

After he finished speaking, he stood up straight, and before I could say anything, he said goodbye to me.

I walked to the waiting area, rubbed the ticket in my hand, and my mind was muddled.Following the guidance of the broadcast, followed the crowd through the ticket gate, got on the bus, sat down in his seat, fastened his seat belt, and then fell asleep drowsily against the back of the seat.

The dream was fragmented. I dreamed of playing with Ye Aichen when I was in elementary school. He beckoned me to play hide-and-seek with everyone.I walked over to the tree and counted with my eyes blindfolded. After counting to a hundred, I opened my eyes and tried to find them, but I found myself standing in an empty room with no one around.I was a little scared and wanted to find an exit to find them, but this room didn't even have doors and windows.Although there is no electric light, it is bright and majestic.I called Ye Aichen's name, and suddenly someone called me from behind.I thought it was Ye Aichen, but when I turned around, I saw a mirror there.I walked over, and my appearance was printed on it, and then slowly twisted into Wang Lerui's appearance.He stared at me with a malicious smile, and whispered repeatedly: "Are you two gay?" There were fierce quarrels and suppressed sobbing around me, the mirror disappeared, and I saw me sitting On the stairs, I lay on my arms and my shoulders trembled.I know I'm crying.The crying gradually became louder, and finally turned into a loud cry.I thought Ye Aichen should be right next to him, but I didn't see it.I tried to walk over to stop myself from crying, but found that I couldn't move.I stood where I was, feeling a warm and soft touch on my face.In an instant, a familiar scene seemed to flash across my mind. Before I could figure it out, the room turned black in an instant, and the ground under my feet suddenly collapsed, and I fell straight down.In the dark falling space, Ye Aichen's serious voice sounded: "I have someone I like." I wanted to ask someone to save me, but I couldn't make any sound.In the end I gave up, thinking about accepting my fate, no one will notice me, everyone probably hates me, no one will like me.I let myself fall, and then I heard someone shouting my name, the voice was shrill: "Wu Zi!"

And then, I woke up.

My head hurts a little, my brain is dizzy, and my heart feels a little nauseous.I looked out the window and found that the car had entered the station, and I could get off in two to three minutes.

I carried my schoolbag and returned to the dormitory by car.After taking a shower, I changed out of the clothes that were stained with the smell of gasoline and car exhaust, and took a big sip of water to feel better.At this point, the cafeteria has been closed, and the dormitory building will be locked soon, and everyone else in the dormitory has not come back yet.I dug out the half bread I bought on the way out of my schoolbag, ate it, brushed my teeth and went to bed.

I think what Wang Lerui said is wrong.How could Ye Aichen and I be gay?We're just a little tighter.Besides, Ye Aichen has someone he likes, even though he hasn't confessed, but he also has a girl he likes, how could he be gay?

and--

How could Ye Aichen like me?

Wang Lerui must have made a mistake.

Or, in fact, he was joking and I just believed it?

Anyway, it couldn't be that way.

surely not.

Go back once, so tired.