I heard you don't know Mary Sue? [Transmigration Book]

What does it feel like to hug someone?

Before meeting Feng Wulin, Feng Mo actually didn't know about it.

In the past, his mother didn't like him, she drank heavily every day and often didn't come home, and when she came home, she was drunk and cried bitterly, crying and muttering about the past between her and the man she loved the most.

Ever since Fengmo could remember, he had never seen her laughing happily. Almost all his childhood was filled with his mother's tears and resentment, so that even he himself didn't remember whether he had ever laughed. It seemed that he had never laughed. In the early days, he didn't know how to laugh, cry or talk.

When she is in a good mood, she likes to self-mutilate every time she is in a bad mood, taking a knife to cut various wounds on her hands, and then crying and laughing crazily.

When Feng Mo was young, he didn't understand why his mother would do that. He didn't dare to go there at all, and he would be caught together as soon as he went out.The first time he ran into him, he didn't understand, so he ran over to stop him, and his entire back was covered in blood. If the neighbors hadn't found out and sent him to a small clinic for bandages, he might have lost too much blood and died.Later, he could only hide in a corner where the lights couldn't reach and watch her secretly. He didn't dare to go out until his mother was tired from crying and fell asleep, and then he dared to go out and hide the knife in the house, and then went to the medicine box to find medicine for her to rub.

When he was a little older and more sensible, he finally learned to put away all the sharp weapons at home before his mother came home, and would rather be caught and beaten by her than tell where those things were.That was the only way the young Fengmo could think of to protect his mother.

There was never a hug between them, and the only physical contact was probably when his mother beat him and when he applied medicine for his mother.Most of the time, Feng Mo himself can't understand why he regards his mother as the only obsession in his previous life, and he chooses not to give up until he really dies. Probably because she is the only relative in his childhood full of darkness and loneliness. Even the pain was almost all caused by her.However, by the time he realized that he had gone the wrong way, it was too late.

Ways of expressing intimacy like hugs and kisses were foreign to him.So every time Feng Wulin hugs him, Feng Mo subconsciously feels happy and novel, he likes everything that makes people feel warm.

That emotion was very gentle, relaxed, and warm, and it was different from any emotion he had ever experienced before.He could clearly feel that the other party cared about him, which Feng Mo had never experienced before, so he cherished it even more.

However, for friends, that kind of hug is too intimate, it completely exceeds the boundaries between friends, and has even become ambiguous, but neither of them reacts to it.

Feng Mo had no experience at all and did not understand, Feng Wulin committed the crime knowingly, such an overreaching move was what he wanted, why not do it?

For Feng Wulin, this is just the beginning, he wants so much, so much that if Amo knows now, he may feel suffocated and depressed, but he doesn't have any desire to stop.No one can stop what he wants to teach Feng Mo.

"Amo, do you know what the two closest people like to do?"

A deep and beautiful male voice suddenly sounded in the quiet study room, but there was no sense of abruptness.

Feng Mo was laying on Feng Wulin's shoulder with his eyes closed, he was startled when he heard this, he opened his eyes with some doubts, stood up and looked into the other's eyes.

He was originally hugged by Feng Wulin and sat sideways on the opponent's lap, but he was caught off guard and kissed several times with his ears in his mouth, before he covered his red ears and asked for a change of position. Rin reluctantly agreed, and then he fell asleep on the young man's shoulder with his arms around the young man's neck.

This question asked by Feng Wulin is not easy to answer, the closest person...to what extent?Is it a unilateral feeling of closeness or a good relationship between both parties?If it was only one-sided, it would probably be to sit and communicate peacefully face to face, at least that was the way he wanted to get close to his mother most in his previous life.

The memo on the floating mobile phone screen has been opened, and a sentence slowly appears: "Let's sit and chat happily, no matter what."

Feng Wulin looked at the screen and raised his eyebrows, he raised his hand and touched the back of Feng Mo's head, the black hair under his palm felt warm and soft, a lock was curled up between his fingers, twisted around, slowly rubbing, Let go of your fingers again, and gently pinch the back of Feng Mo's neck with the palm of your hand, feel the delicate skin under the palm, and slightly close your dark blue eyes, "Is it chatting? In this way, there is indeed a deepest love in A Mo's heart." Someone close, who is it?"

Feng Mo's body froze slightly, he pinched his fingers subconsciously, he glanced at Feng Wulin's calm and serious expression, lowered his head and pressed his lips tightly, his bloodless face was a little paler now, his lips opened and closed Together, but feebly found that he could not make a sound again, the guilt and sadness in his heart even made him forget the fact that Feng Wulin couldn't hear what he said, and there was no need to speak at all.

Feng Wulin hugged Feng Mo with one arm, and put one hand on the back of the other's neck. He felt the boy's stiffness and trembling almost immediately. He bent down to get closer to Feng Mo, and completely embraced him. Hugging tightly, he patted Feng Mo's back with his big hand, tilted his head slightly, and pressed a fiery kiss on the boy's neck with his thin lips. He whispered: "There is nothing to worry about, A Mo, Although I basically know everything about you from that diary, there are some questions I still hope you can answer me personally, I want to know about you."

In fact, when Feng Wulin speaks, he always gives people a sense of self-importance without anger. Perhaps it is because the family power struggles and fights in his youth have tempered his heart and will, and his whole person's aura is also more fierce. But when he faced Feng Mo, he was the complete opposite. He didn't put any pressure on the other party, and he was so calm and deep that he didn't even look like him.

The young man's reassurance is always very effective for Feng Mo. After the initial loss, Feng Mo calmed down. He pushed Feng Wulin to make him back away a little, took back the mobile phone on the table and typed: "I'm sorry, I hid so many things from you before, I know it's unfair to you, I'm sorry."

Both he and the original Feng Mo were clear about those things, but only Feng Wulin was kept in the dark, unprepared to face the fact that he disappeared suddenly, and it was Feng Wulin who hurt the most in this matter .Feng Mo felt extremely guilty and sad for this from the beginning to the end. He knew exactly what it felt like to be abandoned.

"What's the matter?" Feng Wulin looked at the phone screen and gave a low laugh. He pinched Feng Mo's neck, his eyes darkened, "It was my mistake not to guard Ah Mo, not your problem, Ah Mo, you never need to say sorry to me, but do you have to tell me about something? No matter what it is, as long as it is related to you, I will know. "

"It's not just this." Feng Mo shook his head palely, then realized that Feng Wulin couldn't see him, he raised his hand to cover his eyes and took a deep breath before putting his hand back on the phone, "I'm sick, except Social barriers, and a dependent personality disorder, my personality, way of thinking and attitude towards things are different from yours."

Fengmo's hand holding the phone was shaking all the time, this was the first time he had told others about his flaws so clearly, "The closest person you mentioned was my mother before, and I knew since I was a child that I had to rely on Others can live. It doesn't mean that I need help from others in my life. It means that I can't live without another person as my belief support.

In fact, my mother doesn't want me to regard her as an obsession at all. She doesn't love my father, and she doesn't love me either.But I am always insisting, insisting on finding her.

I know that I am a very selfish person, and I will not give up when I identify with a person, regardless of whether the other person is willing to accept it or not.The doctor actually thought of many ways to try to make me give up my mother, because after she died, I basically didn't want to live anymore. I know this is abnormal, but I can't help it.

I only know that unless I die, I can completely let go of her, so I gave up the last operation in my last life. Apart from the reason that it is impossible to cure, the main reason is that I don't have the desire to continue living.It was so painful that I wanted to give up on her. "

Feng Mo's hand holding the phone was so hard that his knuckles turned white, his dark eyes were full of pain, but his face was still expressionless, as calm as if he was just talking about other people's affairs.

He had no right to choose from the very beginning. He once wanted to live independently and not regard anyone as a support point for his life, but the increasing obsession could not allow him to change his mind at all.

Many times, knowing that something is wrong but unable to control it, watching him getting closer and closer to death step by step, the helpless sense of despair almost drives him crazy.

Others may never be able to understand the thinking of people like them, why they must rely on another person to live, but only doctors who have really been in it and know their conditions very well will understand the truth of suffering from this disease. How helpless and painful people are.

Who doesn't want to live freely with independent thinking?Who wants to live in that kind of uncontrollable attachment for a lifetime?If there was a choice, Feng Mo would not have died alone outside in his previous life.

But for Feng Mo, those things have passed after all. The moment he gave up treating his mother as an obsession, that is, death, he had already learned to let go of all the past, and no longer cling to that pain. The relief is indeed effective, even though he still had no desire to live when he first came to this world, he has already started to learn to let go.

The appearance of Feng Wulin, to a certain extent, gave Feng Mo a second life.No matter how many times he is reborn, no matter which world he is in, he will die without support. This sick way of thinking has long been ingrained in his mind, and there is no possibility of eradicating it.

For him like this, he regards Feng Wulin as a life-saving straw and is unwilling to give up, which is simply the greatest unfairness and deception to Feng Wulin.

Rather than saying that Feng Mo needs a only friend, it is better to say that he needs a hope to support him to live.

"Feng Wulin, I haven't told you the truth from the beginning. My mother passed away, and I couldn't live. After coming here, I really didn't know why I was alive at the beginning, so after you appeared," Feng Mo said in a low voice. I closed my head and eyes, and continued to write, "I need a belief to live, and you are that belief. I'm sorry, I haven't made it clear to you. I know it's wrong for me. I just can't help it. I'm sorry."

Feng Wulin didn't have a smile on his face when Feng Mo began to write the first sentence. He just silently watched each word appear on the screen until he stopped completely. It was dark, and the light shone on his tense side face, showing a strange and evil gloom and beauty. He paused for a long time before opening his mouth in a low voice: "Amo, you mean, in your life... if you don't I, can't live?"

His voice was so soft that he could almost say to himself, "When you come here, the first person you see is not me, but Fang Xiaoqiao who treats you very well, but Amo didn't choose her, why? ?”

"The person she wants to like is not me, but Feng Mo. What they see in their eyes is Feng Mo, not Feng Mo." Feng Mo lowered his head weakly, not looking into Feng Wulin's eyes, and answered honestly : "Only you saw me. You are different from everyone else. I'm sorry."

But Feng Wulin didn't get angry on the spot like the boy thought, in fact, he used almost all of his willpower to control himself not to want Feng Mo on the spot, after restraining for a long time, he couldn't help but beat Feng Mo hard. He hugged him hard, wishing he could directly rub the boy into his body.

Feng Wulin's suppressed low laugh came from beside his ear, the voice was extremely hoarse and deep, but the laughter made Feng Mo panicked, he hugged her back blankly, his body was aching from being strangled.Immediately, he was loosened a little more, his chin was pinched and lifted by the young man, and his lips were blocked before he could react in time.

The lips were skillfully held, biting and kissing repeatedly, sucking and licking tirelessly over and over again, the tyrannical force seemed to swallow him up, with a crazy desire to possess and control, entangled and rubbed the kiss stickily It even hurt him a little.

Feng Mo struggled helplessly, trying to avoid Feng Wulin's lips, but was tightly imprisoned in the opponent's arms and could not retreat. The young man's muscles were tense and his whole body was burning hot. He felt like his whole body was going to burn. He just struggled Turning his head away a little, Feng Wulin chased after him domineeringly and continued to lick and kiss, without giving anyone a chance to flinch.

Immediately, the jaws were easily pried open, and the domineering lips and tongue invaded every corner of his mouth inch by inch, the tip of the tongue was caught by the hot tongue to suck the kiss, and was licked against the root of the tongue, Feng Mo's face was suffocated It was flushed red, one hand clenched Feng Wulin's shirt, and he lifted his head weakly to bear it, the sensitive parts of his mouth were occupied one by one, his tongue was numb from being sucked, and his breathing became more and more rapid.

After the kiss, Feng Wulin backed away slightly, took a deep breath of the restlessness in his body under the air pressure, and kissed the tip of the boy's nose with some insatiable desire, rubbed his thumb against the boy's hot cheek, and then realized that Feng Mo was still in a daze He didn't move and didn't breathe, he patted the boy's face lightly to bring him back to his senses, and said in a hoarse voice: "Idiot, breathe quickly, do you want to suffocate?"

The words were obviously reproaches, but the tone revealed the opposite intimacy and tenderness.

He thought he was probably really crazy, he couldn't control himself to kiss Feng Mo even though he couldn't see him, he couldn't pay attention to other things at all, he just wanted to hold her in his palm forever and never let him go. It's fine to be tied to your side for a long time as long as you can see yourself.

Perhaps at the moment when A Mo told himself that he could not live without him, whether it was because of mental illness or emotional tendencies, it was impossible for him to let go.

The author says:

①This chapter explains why Feng Mo identified Feng Wulin when he just crossed over. Those foreshadowings and foreshadowings are really not written for fun... They will not fall in love at first sight for no reason. In fact, there is no such thing .If it was love at first sight, Mr. Feng should like Feng Mo now, not the tail ghost Feng Mo.

②Small theater:

Veteran driver [dumbfounded]: President, you have a really strong taste...so you are the driver!

Feng Wulin [Xuanbao Maniac]: I am willing.Ben doesn't have Armor, do you?

Veteran overturned driver: Of course I... no.If you don't agree with each other, you can drive and take jujube pills!But I still want to say: I love dog food, dog food makes me happy.

③Little angels, I didn’t write Beng, did I?Recently, I have been so busy with my research. I was in the laboratory twelve hours a day. I stayed up all night and my negative energy was a bit too much. I was worried that I would bring in my emotions while writing. mwah.