It's too late

1.

The sun shining on the bed outside the window seemed to be the result of the owner carelessly forgetting to draw the curtains last night.

The person on the bed opened his eyes for a while and then closed them immediately, and put his hands on his eyes to block the stinging sunlight on his face.His temples kept throbbing, and Mu Shaohua felt his head was about to burst from pain. Sure enough, there was a price to pay for a hangover.Endure it for a while, the situation is not better than before, Mu Shaohua angrily threw his hands over his eyes on the bed, turned his head away from the sun and opened his eyes, staring at the wall dimly for two or three seconds , turned his head to look, and found that he was sleeping in a strange place, he can guarantee that he has never been here.

Belatedly, I realized that I was naked with a blanket covering my body. When I lifted the blanket, I found that I wasn't even wearing a pair of underwear.Mu Shaohua thought to himself, didn't he get drunk last night and have a one-night stand with someone else, right?

He remembered that Li Xin came to drink with him last night, Li Xin probably wouldn't watch him being taken away, this place doesn't look like a hotel, it should be Li Xin's home.No, he fucked Li Xin after he got drunk. Thinking about this situation made his aching head even more painful. It would be better to have a one-night stand with someone he doesn't know.

I got up from the bed and stood on the ground, my legs were a little weak, I walked to the closet and opened the closet, and found that most of the clothes were suits, I found a new pair of underwear from the bottom drawer and put them on, and found a relatively large casual Dressing up, it's okay to barely wear it.

When I went to the washroom, I found new ones such as toothbrushes and towels had already been prepared.After Mu Shaohua figured himself out, he walked to the living room and saw bread and milk on the dining table in the living room, and the owner carefully left a note, so he picked up the note on the table to read.

Shaohua:

There is milk and bread on the table. If you get up early, you can eat it directly as breakfast.But I think you drank too much last night and didn't wake up too early. If it's really too late or you don't like to eat, there is pasta in the refrigerator, and you can heat it up in the microwave before eating.

After reading the two sentences, he threw the note on the table again, picked up a piece of bread and gnawed it, and looked around the house. The room was not big, but it was well lit, and the room was very clean.Just looking at Li Xin's room, he knew that Li Xin is a clean person, otherwise ordinary people would like to use light-colored things, and they are not resistant to dirt.

People who look at his dormitory know that when buying anything, you have to consider the issue of tolerance to dirt. The only people he knows well...Only Zheng Li likes to be clean. Every time he goes back to his dormitory, he has to help him tidy up his things and clean the whole dormitory. Clean once.Because of this incident, as soon as Zheng Lu came, everyone in the dormitory joked: "Shaohua, this child is just like your wife. She cleans up for you every time she comes here. She is really virtuous. You still don't want to marry her back home." .”

At that time, I was already pursuing Zheng Lu, so naturally I would not explain it, so everyone was happy to make jokes so that Zheng Lu could understand earlier and know his intentions earlier.How did Zheng Lu answer back then?Thinking of it, Zheng Lu would always blushed and say, "I treat Brother Shaohua as my own brother." He thought Zheng Lu was shy, and he didn't want others to know that he was with a man, making jokes about himself, I am not an inconsiderate person, so I pretended to be angry and asked the people in the dormitory not to make jokes.

"Brother." Mu Shaohua pondered these two words carefully in his mouth. The bread could be swallowed, but these two words could not be swallowed for a long time. How could he be so stupid? .

In Li Xin's house, Mu Shaohua didn't feel like an outsider at all. He walked around and was familiar with the environment. The feeling is too good, too gentle.

Walking to the door of Li Xin's study room, he opened the door and walked in without hesitation. The room was nothing special. When he saw the bookshelves, Mu Shaohua's first impression was that there were too many kinds of books, and not all of them were the kind that successful people must have. There will be books on economics.Mu Shaohua took a closer look, and found that there were even fairy tale books for children, as well as fashion magazines, paintings, and music.No wonder I am not bored chatting with him, I love reading so much, I can chat about any topic.Mu Shaohua thinks that anyone would like to chat with Li Xin, especially he is a person who can chat and is a comfortable person. Mu Shaohua gave Li Xin a high evaluation in his heart.

On the contrary, there were not many things on Li Xin's desk, and a few books were neatly placed on one side of the desk.Mu Shaohua felt strange, since Li Xin had arranged everything, why didn't the photo frame be arranged properly, and it was placed upside down on the table, it was really "one hundred secrets and one sparse".Mu Shaohua walked over to prepare the photo frame.

The moment he picked it up, he glanced at the photo and stared at the photo in surprise. He knew that Li Xin was gay like him, and he knew this when he told him about the troubles of chasing Zheng Lu, and Li Xin offered a trick.Surprisingly, the photo was torn into five or six sheets, and then carefully pasted with tape.

Even though the photo was torn, it can still be seen that Li Xin in the photo is smiling happily, hugging the neck of the man beside him, and the man is pamperingly kissing Li Xin's cheek, the time in the photo is very good.It seems that the photos are from many years ago, and they are a little yellowish.

Mu Shaohua didn't understand Li Xin's feelings. It can be said that since they met, Li Xin seldom talked about himself. Every time they met, he listened to Mu Shaohua's words and Mu Shaohua's complaints about not being able to catch up with Zheng Lu always felt a little distant. , even if Li Xin was occasionally mentioned, Li Xin would subtly change the topic, and Mu Shaohua would talk again, and Li Xin would listen.

Thinking of this, Mu Shaohua suddenly felt uncomfortable. He didn't know the other party at all, but the other party knew almost everything about him. It should be said that there are no businessmen who are not cunning.

2.

After eating the bread on the table and drinking the milk in one gulp, Mu Shaohua didn't stay at Li Xin's house anymore. On the one hand, he stayed at home for nothing, and on the other hand, he wanted to go to the dormitory to tidy up his things and go out to rent a place in the future. Living in a house, originally living in the dormitory is convenient for Zheng Yu, but now people don’t have to chase after him, and he is about to graduate, so it’s better to go out and live.

When he was approaching the door of the dormitory, Mu Shaohua found someone squatting at the door of his dormitory, like a helpless bird.Of course Mu Shaohua knew who that little bird was, but he didn't know why he came looking for him. He made it clear yesterday, so there was nothing else to say.

"Why are you here?" Mu Shaohua approached and asked.

"Brother Shaohua." Zheng Li looked up slowly, his eyes were slightly swollen and red, with a worried look on his face, seeing Mu Shaohua holding his clothes, he barely raised his head and spoke with difficulty, "Where did you go yesterday?" I didn't come back all night, I was very worried about you."

Mu Shaohua and the others are in their senior year, and their roommates either go out to rent a house with their girlfriend, or rent a house next to the internship unit. Only Mu Shaohua stays in the dormitory to chase Zheng Lu.If Mu Shaohua was not in the dormitory, there would be no one in the whole dormitory, so Zheng Yu had to stay at the door of the dormitory and couldn't get in.

Mu Shaohua is not a hard-hearted person, let alone the person in front of him is someone he has loved seriously for two years. Seeing Zheng Li's embarrassed look, his tone involuntarily became gentle, and he pulled Zheng Li up: "Get up first."

Zheng Lu stood up, his legs were already numb after squatting for too long, and he couldn't stand still and fell forward.

"Ah~~~"

"What's wrong?" Mu Shaohua quickly hugged Zheng Lu.

Zheng Li replied pitifully, "I was waiting for you last night, but you didn't come back. My legs went numb just as I stood up."

"You waited for me all night?" Mu Shaohua's tone became more gentle, his movements became more gentle, and there was a trace of anticipation in his heart. After waiting all night, did he think clearly that he had a chance.

Zheng Lu nodded.

Mu Shaohua took out the key from his body, entered the dormitory with half his arms around Zheng Li, and Zheng Li leaned against Mu Shaohua's body.After entering the dormitory, Mu Shaohua put Zheng Lu on the bed and squatted on the ground to massage Zheng Lu's legs.

"Call me next time, you will suffer so much for waiting." Mu Shaohua said distressedly.Zheng Lu came to him, and he felt very happy, and he couldn't help but start to look forward to it, expecting Zheng Lu to say that he finally found out that he likes him.

"Brother Shaohua's phone is not turned on."

Mu Shaohua took out his mobile phone to check, it turned out that the battery was out, so he said apologetically, "I will pay attention next time."

"It's okay, Brother Shaohua, I'm not too tired." Zheng Li immediately said empathetically, "Brother Shaohua, you're just unhappy for a while. I'm here to tell you that I really treat you as my own brother." , I didn’t lie.” Seeing Mu Shaohua’s complexion getting more and more strange, Zheng Li’s words gradually quieted down, and his head also lowered, almost buried in his chest.

Mu Shaohua stopped what he was doing, stood up, hugged his chest, suppressed the breath in his chest, and said, "Zheng Lu, what do you mean?"

Zheng Lulai just told himself this matter. I didn’t say enough yesterday, so what’s the point of repeating it again today?I don't need him to tell me how stupid I was back then over and over again.

Zheng Lu asked in a low voice: "Brother Shaohua, weren't we good before? I want to be your younger brother."

"Have you ever seen my brother have unreasonable thoughts about my brother?" Mu Shaohua said mockingly, "Zheng Lu, I don't want to see you, let's go." After speaking, he turned sideways, walked to the door, and pulled Open the door and wait for Zheng Lu to go out.

Zheng Li walked up to Mu Shaohua, shed tears, and cried, "Brother, it was fine before, aren't we very close? Why do you want that kind of relationship? And you want us to be different in the future. See you." Tears kept falling.Although Mu Shaohua couldn't bear to look at it, he also hardened his heart not to look at Zheng Lu.

"I loved you once, but I can't treat you as a younger brother. I won't be sad if I don't see you."

When Zheng Lu went out, Mu Shaohua immediately closed the door.Kicked over the chair by his feet and lay down on the bed angrily.

If Mu Shaohua hadn't fallen deeply in love with Zheng Lu, and Zheng Lu had rejected Mu Shaohua and told Mu Shaohua that they could only be friends, Mu Shaohua wouldn't even want to see Zheng Lu. , Maybe we will really be friends in the future.It's a pity that Zheng Yu wanted to be friends with him while not rejecting Mu Shaohua's pursuit, allowing Mu Shaohua to show love and cooperate with ambiguity.Mu Shaohua couldn't stand this kind of treatment, he didn't want to see Zheng Lu again.Otherwise, every time he sees her, he will feel like a fool.

3.

Li Xin opened the door, and saw the person who had disappeared during the day reappeared in front of him, and there was a big suitcase behind him, feeling that the world was magical.

"You...how could..." Li Xin wanted to ask curiously, but he didn't know how to ask.

"Can I go in?" Mu Shaohua asked tiredly.

"Of course." Li Xin hurriedly let go and opened the door, took Mu Shaohua's suitcase, and let Mu Shaohua in.

"You haven't recovered from yesterday's breakup, so you're very sad." Li Xin could see that Mu Shaohua was sad, he didn't know what happened, and now he seemed more depressed than yesterday.However, Li Xin can't help it, a broken love makes a person like this, as long as he has loved deeply.

"Do you have any wine? Have a few more drinks with me, anyway, tomorrow is the weekend." Mu Shaohua threw himself heavily on the sofa and lay down.

Li Xin took out a few cans of beer from the refrigerator and put them on the table, opened a can and handed it to Mu Shaohua, then opened a can for himself, sat next to Mu Shaohua to watch TV, ignored Mu Shaohua, let Mu Shaohua wanted to understand, after all, there were some things that others couldn't help.

Mu Shaohua drank a few cans by himself and felt that it was not enough, so he got up and took out a few cans from the refrigerator. After drinking too much, he was willing to talk: "I saw him waiting for me at the door of the dormitory today, and I was secretly happy, thinking that he changed his mind. I didn't expect him to say that he regarded me as an older brother again."

Seeing Mu Shaohua talking to him, Li Xin turned off the TV and said: "You will know later, even if your person agrees to you now, he will never say goodbye in the future, no matter how sweet the love is, it will expire. It’s even more sad to lose it later, it’s better not to have it.” Li Xin thought of the past, his eyes filled with sadness.

"You mean yourself?" Mu Shaohua drank too much, thinking of the photo he saw in the study, he said, "I saw the photo of the study."

Li Xin was not angry, and even laughed: "No, at that time, I felt that the two of us were so sweet together, and I couldn't even think about being apart for a while, and wanted to rub each other to the bone. I think that after this, we will definitely be together forever , otherwise it is unscientific. We have been together since freshman year. At first I didn’t want to provoke him. I thought I was a homosexual. People have different paths. He confessed to me, he said he likes me and is willing to be with me forever."

"Forever! It's a beautiful promise. I believed it and agreed. I still imagined my future life from time to time. Those days were the happiest and most unforgettable time I lived. But, I told you, love is beautiful , but there is also a shelf life, if he doesn’t love me anymore, we will break up.”

"I just broke up. I was looking for death just like you. I'm not here now. So, you will be fine too."

After Li Xin finished speaking in one breath, he felt much more at ease. His love affair with Lu Yuan was a thorn in his heart, and it hurt his heart from time to time.

Seeing Mu Shaohua's painful loss of love, Li Xin did think of his relationship with Lu Yuan, taking advantage of the effect of alcohol, the atmosphere was still good, and shared what was in his heart with those who suffered.

"Really? It will get better after a long time." Mu Shaohua lay on the sofa and murmured.

"You are still young, you haven't even had a relationship with him, strictly speaking, you are still a crush, come out quickly. Don't waste time on being sad, it's best to find another target." Li Xin persuaded Mu Shao magnificent.

After drinking the last sip of wine in his hand, Li Xin stood up and said: "You can sleep in the study room tonight. There is a bed there, although it is a bit small. After this night, I will change the sheets."

After tidying up the sad feeling of just remembering the past, Li Xin went to the room to get the sheets, leaving Mu Shaohua alone to think.

What Li Xin said was not unreasonable, Mu Shaohua knew it.Yes, he has liked Zheng Lu for so long. Strictly speaking, he has a crush on Zheng Lu. Even if he behaves so that everyone around him knows that he likes Zheng Lu, what can he do?Zheng Lu didn't like him, so he couldn't put a knife on Zheng Lu's head and force Zheng Lu to say, "I like you, how can you not like me? If you don't like me, I'll kill you." Mu Shaohua couldn't speak such words.

In the past, it was not very generous to break up with a lover. The two would break up peacefully if they had no relationship. Although they were sad, they were not as hopeless as this.Could it be that Zheng Lu's words stimulated him, since he obviously doesn't love him, Zheng Lu still wants to be the same as before.How can it be the same?In the past, I was holding on to the idea of ​​living in the future, but what are I holding on to now?It's all bullshit.

Mu Shaohua felt that he was getting depressed, and he almost looked down on himself.

Li Xin came out, patted Mu Shaohua on the shoulder and said, "Don't drink too much, go to bed early." After speaking, he ignored Mu Shaohua and went to the bathroom to wash up and get ready for bed.

Mu Shaohua didn't move, didn't drink, just stared at the lights on the ceiling, which became more and more blurred.

Eyes left tears.