drink moonlight alone

Are you angry?

Indeed it is.

What are you angry about?

Angry at his father's bullshit?Or Zhou Weiyue's protection for herself?After all, in the final analysis, if Zhou Weiyue hadn't sacrificed herself to block it for her, then her father's angry slap must have landed on her face.

Zhou Qingyan recalled in a daze that it had been a long time since he had let his emotions dictate so recklessly, and when he recovered, he had already blurted out an impolite rebuttal.Perhaps what the teacher said is not unreasonable, growth is nothing more than grinding away the edges and corners of youth step by step, waiting for reality to cover one's mouth, waiting for the voice of one's heart to be trapped in the chest forever, waiting for oneself to become a slick adult who hates philistines.

Whether it's the education in the family or the innate personality, Zhou Qingyan has always been calm and calm, even if he is angry, he rarely shakes the ground.But this time he was really angry, but Zhou Qingyan couldn't explain why he was angry.To sum it up in words, he can only blame himself for all the unhappiness. It is because he cannot satisfy his parents, and he makes Zhou Weiyue worry about himself everywhere. Everything is because of himself.

"I'm sorry." Zhou Qingyan stood in front of Zhou Weiyue, and the two of them were in a posture of up and down, so that Zhou Qingyan's gaze was bent down, half of his eyes were covered in shadows, and the other half was bright and clean.

Zhou Weiyue asked: "Why?"

"I asked you to slap me for no reason, and I also suffered from my father's temper." Zhou Qingyan spoke slowly, as if full of some kind of true feelings, so thick that he was so thick that he tried to hide in the sudden The fishy and salty sea breeze and tide.

"Why did it happen for no reason?"

"Ok?"

"In the final analysis, isn't it me that is the source of the conflict between you and Dad?" Zhou Weiyue raised her hand, brushed away Zhou Qing's temple hair that fell from the side of the ear to the eyelashes, and hooked it back to his ear.

Zhou Qingyan closed her eyes tightly in frustration, and let out a long sigh, "Yes."

At that time, the handkerchief stuck to the side of Zhou Weiyue's face had already been covered with heat, and it was not cold at all. The remaining running water slid down his sharp chin, and dripped on the collar to form water stains. Zhou Qingyan removed the handkerchief, Carefully looking at the red palm print on it, fortunately, the swelling has gone down a lot, at least if you don't look closely, you can't see the clue.

After looking at it for a while, Zhou Qingyan stretched out her hand tremblingly, bent her knuckles and touched the skin on her head that was colder than the rest of the skin due to the ice compress, and stroked it lightly.

"Don't you ask?" Zhou Qingyan lowered her eyes, looked left and right to make sure that there was no one around the pavilion, and then sat next to Zhou Weiyue, leaning gently on Zhou Weiyue's shoulder.

Zhou Weiyue asked back: "Ask what?"

"I have a crush on you for 12 years."

As the words fell, Zhou Weiyue's expression was a little surprised in the corner of his eye, but he didn't show it. He pursed his mouth with a curved smile and remained silent, making Zhou Qingyan involuntarily feel that his uneasiness was like fried eggs on a hot pan at this moment. The side facing the fire is almost burnt, but it has not been turned over by the person in charge of the spoon.

Since the two were not together, Zhou Qingyan had thought about it countless times, what kind of posture, expression and tone she would use to tell Zhou Weiyue truthfully during those 12 years when she was ashamed to speak.It's as if Jian Rong once asked Zhou Qingyan about this deep topic. At that time, he swore that he would tell the other party about it.

And at this moment, even if the timing is not as favorable as I expected, it can even be said to be unexpected, but what has happened has already happened, and shrinking back will only make me loathe myself.Those devious years have passed, and Zhou Qingyan didn't intend to use the secret love as a weakness to manipulate Zhou Weiyue's emotions. After all, feelings are very pure, and liking is liking, just because It's this person, that's all.

"Want to hear a story?" Zhou Qingyan straightened up, faced Zhou Weiyue, and blinked lazily, "But it's a bit tedious."

Zhou Weiyue quietly took Zhou Qingyan's right hand into her palm, and murmured: "Yes."

"Then don't fall asleep listening to it."

"Let me think about it," Zhou Qingyan cleared his throat, and looked at the intersecting hands of the two seriously, "I found out that I liked you that year, and I would feel palpitations, shyness, cranky thoughts, and arousal. I even dreamed of doing those shameless things with you. But I was afraid, afraid that you would not accept it, and afraid that people around would cast unfriendly eyes on you, so after frankly discussing with my parents, my father gave me two There are two options, one is to stay in China, but your parents will cancel your adoption; the other is to go abroad, and after a long time, I will naturally forget this meaningless relationship."

"But it's a pity that I didn't do it. Even in a foreign country, I still can't help myself to pay attention to your affairs. Through Jianrong, there are many people you don't know. And the dishes you like are not Accidentally, but I have made a lot of deliberate efforts."

"Even if I know that you have a girlfriend in China and live a good life, I still like you."

At the end of the sentence, Zhou Qingyan watched Zhou Weiyue holding his hand trembling slightly, then raised his thumb and stroked the protruding knuckles on his head. He was silent for a while, "It's heavy, right? You don't have to worry about it..."

"elder brother."

Zhou Weiyue lowered her head, the shadows cast by her slender eyelashes almost concealed the emotions in his eyes, but her voice was so hoarse and obscure that it seemed to have been rubbed down by sandpaper.Just as Zhou Qingyan was about to speak, she saw Zhou Weiyue's Adam's apple slid up and down for a while, and then raised her head, her eyes intersecting in the air were straight, and the fundus of her eyes was so red that it seemed to be bleeding.There are many inexplicable and complicated emotions mixed in it, such as incomprehension, anger, helplessness, sadness, and many more, so many that even if you scratch the cocoon, you can't tell the reason.

"Do you really think so?" Zhou Weiyue said with red eyes, every word.

Zhou Weiyue was angry, and still very, very angry.

Zhou Qingyan felt it clearly the moment she met Zhou Weiyue's gaze.

That expression was clearly like an extremely angry wolf cub trying to suppress his instinct to show his claws, and controlled not to tear his skin with his sharp teeth, to drink blood and eat flesh.Every word he spoke was trembling, as if he was about to crush his teeth, sharpening them with difficulty.

Zhou Qingyan just wanted to comfort her with a shiver, but in the next second, Zhou Weiyue's eyes began to fill with water, and then it burst out of the eyes in an instant, and fell on the back of Zhou Qingyan's hand tick-tock along the cheeks. superior.

At the same time, the wind blew up, rustling the grass at the feet and the osmanthus leaves above the head, like a piece of crumpled rice paper, which contained the taciturn ravings of the old literati, and the green and yellow leaves with two or three tips were blown off , After hovering stubbornly in the air, he finally fell into the mud.Farther away, there are fishing boats returning to the port, and the kites are circling and returning to their nests. The so-called golden autumn has not yet been seen on this island. It seems that as long as the heart belongs, everything will come as expected.

After Zhou Weiyue finished that sentence, she seemed to have exhausted her strength, and she didn't say anything anymore, allowing Zhou Qingyan to wipe away his tears, holding the inside of his wrist and rubbing it flatteringly.

I don't know how long we have been silent with each other, anyway, when Zhou Qingyan came back to his senses, the sun had already hidden half behind the overlapping mountains, leaving the sunset as thick as a watercolor that cannot be fainted.

"I haven't talked to Wen Muqing, and I'm not doing well in China. I miss you very much. I want you more than my surname Zhou." Zhou Weiyue broke the silence.

A very simple sentence is enough to stop Zhou Qingyan's mind from functioning.

Of course Zhou Qingyan understood the meaning of this sentence. All the choices he thought he had made for Zhou Weiyue were in vain, leaving indelible scars between them.Zhou Weiyue did not have a good life after she left, those were just superficial, they tacitly pretended to be a good life for each other - Zhou Weiyue liked her own time, perhaps more than she thought Long, I am afraid it will not be much less.

But Zhou Qingyan no longer had the courage to ask.Even if they are together now, the 12 years of wasted time difference are like a gap stretching at both ends, forever straddling the two of them.

Regret?

Regret, but it's useless. After all, if regret is useful, there will be so many cynics in the world.Life teaches us that the choices we make are all leading to different forks. It may not be smooth all the way, but it is by no means a mistake. Those thorns and gravel that go around and hurt our muscles and bones are just for the reunion and the rest of our lives. foreshadowing.

"I'm sorry," so Zhou Qingyan didn't care whether anyone would pass by now, the phone in his pocket kept ringing, he just held Zhou Weiyue's cheeks, and put his lips on them, "I love you."

The author says:

I will finish the whole article today!